Overall review score lowered; it's gone off the deep end and there's no saving this anymore
Urgh... I guess I'll have to be the first to write a review here and admit I was reading a random Harry Potter fanfiction straight out of the ''New'' list!
You caught me
The chapters have been released quick so far and its a blessing. I hope they continue quickly because the reason I rated this fanfiction as a 4/5 is because it works very well as a guilty pleasure. Overall enjoyable; the author has directly admitted to be an amateur. This is honestly way better then some of the atrocities I've read on this website. There was care put into this.
Do note that there's a harem/sexual content tag in the story description... If broomsticks and butterbeers arent your thing...
Here's the breakdown
Style 3/5 - Its readable. Some people will be in for a shock at the beginning. Its VERY Wuxia in its writing. Completely detached sentences. To any natively English reader, you'll get a feeling that there's something slightly wrong with the pacing. To readers who know and have read wuxia novels, you'll understand what I mean. As the later chapters become a bit more dialogue focused, you feel that effect less and less however.
To the author, I recommend reading He Who Fights With Monsters (available on this website) to get a good look at short chapters with a good chapter pacing sentence structure, especially when it comes to descriptive paragraphs. If you want this to be a bit more cohesive, your chapters should also have a better, ''snappy'' cliffhanger ending to create a better reading flow. There's quite a few occasions where whats written is completely redundant as the context is self-explanatory. Also, I do want to note that some of the chapters were more well done overall, especially in the later ones, so dont get discouraged!
Story 4/5 Overall... yeah its a guilty pleasure. The pace is strangely quick which helps in the context that the style is very stiff, so at least the author is not putting us through unending descriptions. There's a bit of a ''Warlock of the Magus World'' feeling to this.
Grammar 3.5/5 For an amateur author, the grammar is really not too bad. There's a few typo but nothing abnormal. There's also some sentences which are built with the wrong verb tenses or would feel more natural reworded.
Character 3.5/5 Strangely enough again, the story has been pushed along quite quickly and the main character actions and motive are pretty clear so far. The JKR characters obviously help support this and since we all know them so well, you dont think too much about how much they do the heavy lifting in the story. I can't help but cut marks out for the motives being somewhat cringey. There's a few real world references to other works that didnt contribute anything to the story and definitelly add to that cringe.
Overall... considering the number of chapter... if you're looking for an easy to read Potter fanfiction, why not give this a try?
Force of Will took me a bit by surprise. The beginning chapters are a bit short but one quickly finds his pace here and this is surely helped by the Mc's sidekicks (a girl and a boy sidekick in a school... A traditional trio).
Style: I have some issues with the style, but this is mostly because I usually been spoiled webnovels that have tight beginning and endings (think He Who Fights with Monsters). I'm also okay with self-contained story chapters like the Wandering Inn. Force of Will doesn't reach that level but the prose is still decently structured. It reads better when binged, the story arcs meld well together. Also, this might cime off strong, but the author jokes during a particularly Theorycrafting chapter that "it had to happen". It made me laugh but also wish that it didn't have to be. I hope the Xianxia systems won't go "full Xianxia" and make no sense
Story: the setting is well done with a mix of popular genre. Unless I've missed a lot, it feels like there are very few kernels of a higher plot. If I'm wrong and the author has bamboozles us, I'm sorry. So far, it's mostly magic school slice of life. Enjoyable!
Grammar: I'm not sure how much has been revised, but I've seen way, way worse. Some obvious typos but they were rare. Author is receptive and fixing things. Kudos!
Character: falls a bit short in this category. The MC is a charmer with every girl he meets, making them blush in delight. Is this a harem novel? They ALL do it! Author, you had it right by having one lady be an asshole to the MC! Why did she fall for him too, he was being a pompous prince with his sister!
The character taking the place of Ron Weasley is especially silent and just not very engaging, there's a waste of potential. They should have their own motivations and conflicts, and too many characters were introduced too quickly diluting the whole novel's potential. I seriously recommend a refocus into their friendship. A character which is initially a rival just... Quickly becomes another love interest? Characters fall a little bit much into their archetypes as a result.
What I wrote directly above was a bit negative...
But Overall, the total was better than it's parts and frankly enjoyable, and I recommend reading the novel. Its popularity will 100% rise if the release schedule can become constant.Right now I don't know what to expect on that front. It's longevity will depend on bringing in a few more world building conflict and a focus onto important characters. The harem needs to stop! There's so much potential to have my expectations subverted and the MC be called out for the Mary Sue he's becoming. On the short term, the MC needs more conflict and challenges, he's becoming OP. I'll be following with interest.
Read up to chapter 11
I usually write long reviews but all the other posters said it better. Overall I give this work complete full marks. Its just that good.
And don't worry, it wont take long before you find out if you like it or not. Just get through the first chapter, it sets the tone well, so give it a go!
Honestly, this is a great work. if I had to single out one particular point, it would be the worldbuilding and pacing. You clearly have no idea what's going on, just like the MC does, but everything is clearly fleshed out and crumbs are spread thin and nice. The action regularily goes up to 20 then down to 0, back to 20. It keeps you on your toes in a great way.
The different factions have clear goals that our MC need to navigate, and finding out his crazy solutions to problems is a blast
The main character also has a very clear and logical thinking pattern. His actions clearly follow his state of mind. The paranoia doesnt mean crazyness, it means that there's some spooky government conspiracies and our character is living in the fringes, trying to find a place in the world.
The grammar is 100% fine and clear
Obviously we'll have to see if it will run the distance, but this is one of the best starts I've seen in a long, long while
This is still a fairly fresh novel so I'm not gonna go too deep into my review
I just want to put it out there to IGNORE THE SHORT, BAD REVIEWS. There are a few 0.5's that just make absolutely no sense. There is no big problem with grammar. Characters are not one dimensional and within the first thirty chapters there are quite a few instances of them breaking out of their shells.
Back to the novel... This has shot WAY up to the top of my ''to watch'' list here on RR
-Characters are not still, you see them all develop yet they still have their own identity. I find that the relationship between our MC and his brother feels radically different than that of his relationship with his friend and potential love interest. Huge plus.
-The pace is at a really, really sweet spot. There's often something big happening but nothing feels unnatural. Considering there's a short ''school arc'', this is actually quite surprising and a nice feat to pull off.
-No problems at all in the grammar / style. Its very easy and fun to read, flows well
-FORESHADOWING. Plot elements are placed well in advance yet arent unnatural
-Good structure in making this an attractive novel for RoyalRoad (a bit of self-contained elements in each chapter which have small cliffhangers and feel like a good ''daily serial''). I would pay to follow this on Patreon
-Super interesting story with the world expanding naturally as our MC sees more of the world (sorry for that one)
-Almost none. Some commenters suggest things for our author to fix like small discontinuities or improvements, and they're fixed if eggregious.
A must-read this season!!
Full disclosure, I support this work on Patreon and am up to date on advanced chapters
Without saying too much, The Trespasser has a really interesting concept right from the get-go. A strong story and an intriging world: just enough is being revealed at just the right pace. Its really keeping my attention on that front and makes it a great ''daily'' read, which is what I look for the most in series on RoyalRoad. Whether you like the style or not, the LitRPG elements are not obnoxious either. Its overall a lot of fun.
Our main character is a bit goofy but likeable. Other negative reviews were unfair in my opinion. Our MC is dying right off in the first chapter; as he starts to understand the world around him, his actions make more sense and he clearly grows. Other characters seem to have their own motivations as well.
Style and grammar... everything is good but its not exceptional. A big positive is that the author has been quickly correcting any typos that are found.
In short, the story and worldbuilding is great. It absolutely fills my need for a daily updated novel. Its a bunch of fun to read on the way to work and I always look forward to the new chapters.
Give it a go!
Full disclosure, I decide to support this author directly
I havent rated this perfect. ''Shade and Flow'' isnt as deeply crafted as some of the 5 star works on this website for a few reasons. There's no mind-blowing revelations in a multilayered timeloop.
But I love it in short, here's why I'm supporting this
1. Constant, self contained updates
2. Good worldbuilding and very clean litRPG structure. There's a bit of bloat when items are described but the abilities are not overwhelming like some other works. I love LitRPG but have 25 complex abilities (or literally hundreds...) just makes things tedious. Others have mentionned it but the duality of the setting is extremely well done.
3. A passionate author who's been reviewing his chapters for typos and seems just generally open to suggestions and criticism, and has been interacting with his viewers
Sometimes the luck of our characters seem to be a bit too good to be true; despite the harsh setting. There's some tough moments, but this work doesnt feel ''grimdark''. Fortunately, in the latest chapters, there's a few more moments that our characters explore the consequences of their actions and overeagerness.
Simply put, this makes for a really, really fun serial. The overall flow of the work is smooth and enthralling, a page turner; this makes for a great daily read.
Give it a go!
I usually hate this genre. It becomes a string of "but thats right, I now have access to [Overpowered Item I Havent Mentionned Before!]"
There's a bit if that in this work but I strongly enjoy the characters, the jokes , the pace of release and story and the vibe.
Its not a masterpiece but this could shortly be the kind of work I wake up to every day and enjoy on my way to work. That's something that money cant buy
Well this shot to the top of ''Popular this Week''! My review contains a bit of information from the first 2 chapters of the novel that is heavily implied in the title and synopsis.
I wont mince my words. I'm a big reader of Chinese serials of all kind. But this is BY FAR one of the BEST WORKS I've ever read in the genre.
This is mixing a lot of genres... and taking some of the ''memes'' about it and playing with them in a good way. The cultivation system was heavily simplified, which is a bit of a bummer so far, but there's still so much room for this to grow.
What I mean by a mix of genres and memes? Well... there's an isekai element where our protagonist is beaten up by a young master. He ends up creating a magical farm and is deceptively strong. Spirit beast shennenigans. Not giving face to the local sect... Anyway, you've got a bunch of classics here.
But it being told through a rational, likeable MC mixed with the viewpoint of his ''apprentice'' chicken... wow. The pace and feel of the story is just so wholesome and fun. It is a beauty.
I support a few of the bigger authors on Patreon since I enjoy their works so much, but I'm getting in early on this. The consistent updates are just the cherry on the cake.
Even if you're not a big fan of xianxia, give this a go. The story, characters, style, grammar, there's no flaw here.
I just love how some of the top reviewers are trashing this
Guys, I like going to Michelin restaurants. But everyday after work, I really want to enjoy a juicy burger and a cold beer.
A quickly updated power fantasy isekai with good grammar and plenty of badassery... yeah, I'm moist.
F' the haters. MDW, I'm already addicted. Much love!
I'm just writing this to give visibility to the work. I rarely read things on ''New'' and usually stick to ''Trending'', but I have no doubt it will make it there soon. There's only 23 chapters as of writing but I'm satisfied with what I read and am very much looking forward to see where this will go. The author's writing pace of 1 chapter a day is certainly a great plus too!
The beginning is somewhat confusing in its direction, but the synopsis says it all. The world certainly has a few catches to lead me on. There's a few discretely placed mysteries and other interesting characters with unknown motives.
All in all, give this a try. I could absolutely imagine this reaching the heights of RR, especially if the flow of chapter doesn't stop!!