The style. Very unique style, the politics of this superhero world is very decently though trough with laws that almost make about as much sense as some that exist in the world today. Evil ish supercorp is building sentient bio weapons for god reasons for evil corps, and cover up its escape for other good reasons(hint: its cash. But the reason for it being so valuable makes sense) , economy makes sense, politics makes about as much sense as politics do. Infrastructure makes surprisingly amount of Even the giant monster ruling the city neighbouring the one in our story takes place in makes sense.
Story: escaped superweapon trying to blend into the crowd, and makes friends. After all who doesn't like the guys from r/totallynotrobots. Although he keeps getting a sader and sader past among his friends "did you know sodas came in different flavours? Mind. Blown."
Grammar : excellent. We all blame weird structure on the mc.
Characters : the characters are excellent. The mc learning to fitt in is a wonderful thing that he does with out anyone thinking aaaaaaanything is off with the weird murderous goffball.
The rest of the cast is also solid. Daughters of known villains and students trying to make enough to pay for college all take up henshing for their own in character reasons.
Only flaw is that there is not enough of it yet.
gramar is bad, and the style is hard to follow. the author clearly has an idea of what he wants to tell, and the storyy and what is happening is so clear in his head, that he forgets to put anything of it down on the paper.
redo it, and it might become a proper story. you clearly have the story in your mind, it just needs work. allot of work
The mc is... Not that bright.
He buys skills he has no need for, like gun skills when he, and the entire world, has 0 guns total. He will get those later, but don't question if he needs them after using the weapon for decades or if he can earn the skill outside of the skill store ...
Author has an idea what he wants to happen and doesn't always think about if the order makes sense
Writing is OK, but not great. Plazing the mc a hundred years into the future and having him use today's gear is also questionable ... Especially after decades of worldwar.
Guess it's a decent time waster, but it doesn't belong on trending in it's current form. Other vice, bog standard isekai so far...
Quite similar to the other work of the author
The work is not original if you are looking for a unique and engaging story or am interesting new take on an old subject, This is not it.
It is However, a decent time waster. Its not great, but it is not bad.
The game system in this world is very different than all the rest you encounter on rr, but you can tell its well though out.
In a very much connected subject, the world building is excellent. We haven't yet seen much of the world, but what we have seen is great and makes sense in accordance with the premise of the world.
It can be abit hard to keep up with the veird perspectives of the world, but that is good as it allows us to see the world from the confusing perspective that it is, inworld
Characters are great. They make mistakes that are believable. They have assumptions. They exell in some things and are weak at others.
We haven't seen any true romance yet but it might have been hinted at.. .
Well worth a read, if only to experience the difference from the standard systems
soo... to upgrade the score with an actual reveiw.
The style is solid. the author uses 2 magical systems in his world, a "softish" spiritual magic system and one "hard", it those are terms familar to you. both well balanced with it's own proes and cons. and the inworld philosophical discusion between mages about them, and why a true true mage knows both is well thought out. religion and goverment is clearly thought out, witouth being slamed into our faces. racial tensions exist, and are well thought out and ofthen even have a decent explenation in different cultures
Story: yet again, solid. everyone is rational. their thoughts and plans make sence from their own perspectives, sure the hero is less racist than almost everybody else, but she has reasons for it, such as acctually trying to live what is pretched. bit naive, but still shown as inteligent and capable of learning. The sexual content part is pretty much a lie though. romantic undertons and bordelo workers that dress slightly skimpy is about as far as it goes.
Characters: Very, very solid. as stated in the story, everyone is rational. their thoughts and plans make sence from their own perspectives. if they act like an idiot, they probably have a reason for it. sure, not always a good reason, but sometimes the racist lynchmob realy just hate those darn greenskins, and thinks a filthy halfbreed is should stay away from their hot arian women. the corrupt official is more likley to bring down his extortions on a dude of collour. their likes and dislikes makes sense, and not everyone will agree with decitions but can still act mature about it. hollywood rarly makes their characters this solid or real
wow, there is alot of edge here. fairly decent gramar, and litle to no spelling mistakes.
just... if you do decide to read this, be prepared for edgelord extream. no good things can hapen to the MC for more than a chapter, then everyone has to betray her again, or push her down into further missery, just so she can be even more edgy and evolve faster into a higher ranked demon/angel hybrid. when it hapens once, fair enough. secund time.... meh, sure, she needed to get away. but third time in under 5 chapters? not even tuching on slave torture dungeon prolog. there is such a thing as to tragic a backstory. atleast let her rest or setle into her new resting place before you destroy it. or she loses pretty much nothing, she wasn't even free 1 month before you sent her back to the torture dungeon.might as well not have her escape in the first place. you became so enamored in destroying her happines, that her missery got in the way of you telling us her story.
The story seems OK. Very inspired by upgrade specialist, but seems OK.
But the grammar... Mate, even your edited version is horrible. I can read most things, and my own grammar is not super good, but this was painful
Get a proof reader, or the story is unreadable. And it really does have potential to be fairly decent
Couldn't get long enough to comment on characters due to the grammar
while this story is dead, i am reviewing in hopes of someone taking inspiration from it and make their own. one of the best superhero stories i have ever seen, uniqe and funny, logical and engaging. its a crying shame that the author disapeared. human playing AI have never been done this well, op power is balanced by being properly ballanced even in a pay to win world. AI is having AI problems.
A great story. takes the old clasic mech animes and show a different side to them. having a datenight determined by a battle, using mechs and explosves? well, whom is going to pay for that? who fixes the arena after your hormonial teens dump half a ton of tnt on it? You want to use your american unit mecha in a place that uses SI mesurments? Service half the schools worth of mechs over night after you have a war over a blockheaded idiot? Are you mad?
Legal battles, keeping up with licences, cheating gallore, the dark underbelly of the rich and famus, employe abuse. totaly-loyal-nonbribable-overworked-techs that would betray their employer for a decent nights sleep, or a cup of coffe, or a lolipop. or, you know, acctually humane working conditions... and if someone does subpar work, then it was probably Jhons fault, you know, that guy that totally works here in case someone asks.
keep your code clear, your security updates on point, and your workers happy, and you will maybe succed in the world of rigs. or atleast suffer less damage from corporate espionage