DoktorPrimat

DoktorPrimat

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Change: New World

This story is nice and fresh, it has a gamer feel to it, though it isn't VR. What I do like about it is that instead of focusing on the game aspect it seems to be used to guide and help the story progress instead of being relied upon.

The story itself I find quite nice. A change happens through outer-worldy means, which results in the protagonists dilemma. The story itself is somewhat dark, as the protagonist has to adapt to the new hostile invoriment he has been placed in. This causes changes in him, which can be understood by reading between the lines, though maybe a subtle hint in the actual story to point out that his change is not something that happened on a whim, would help smooth things out.

The grammar part I can't comment too much over. I like your style, it is fascinating and draws the reader in. Though here and there I see a few typos and mistakes. 

The character is well explained and is developing really well. So keep that up! Even though we to date is around 20-ish chapters in, the story have only progressed so far, leaving not too much to see about the MC.

Keep up the good work, I really like your story!

 

-Dok

All Hail the Penguin Empire!


Universe Online

A BRILLIANT Sci-Fi Serie which you wouldn't mind reading twice!

Hello Viken! And fellow Penguins who is reading this post!

First of all, this is probably one of the best, and most detailed sci-fi series you can find out there. The detail to story, and systems such as the Aspect Web and detail to surroundings are magnificent.

The Story itself is brilliant! Some places needs a bit of tidying up on, such as progression of MC. MC seems to have it "easy" with him gaining power. Though I wouldn't really put it like that, since if you were to be in his shoes, the mental stress would be a major headache, but unfortunately we aren't in his shoes. So maybe, just maybe, give a tad more visual setbacks, hardships. (e.g. stuff breaking apart, missing important sandwich...)

Another thing might be to put more diversity into the characters. So far they seem to be more than obedient to follow all his demands. (which again, would make sense since they have litterly been on deaths doorstep before he came..) Even though the mentality for why they act like that is understandable, some things, should maybe change. (Like a revolutionary group that doesn't want him on the throne [Andrix 2.0.?] or at least some slackers maybe? no? Sandwich?)

But now I make it sound like everything is bad. Which is definitely not true! I am an avid fan, and the reason for that, is simply because of these 4 things. 1. Author is nice. 2. Author knows where he wants to go with this story 3. The possibility of how deep the history of Universe Online can go is immense, and if Author goes full BANANAs (love this word) the story would be beautiful. And 4. It's a Sci-Fi! So give me moar! (Yes, I can use that word. Because I'm a Viking. Fact.)

The style is brilliant, the MC suffers from ALS, so he doesn't have much to do other than play, yet we do get RL bits and pieces which shows us how he goes about his daily life outside Universe Online. Personally, i'm a huge Sci-Fi fan so I'm really chuffed about this style of writing. The way the Author have written it in makes it very friendly for the readers and pulls one in, so you can really feel like you are a part of it all!

Grammar is really nice, though sometimes slip-ups come through, but nothing major that really seems to disrupt the story line while reading. So keep it up!

 

Pew! That was a lot. I think... 

Well then, Penguins! by the Power of The Empire! Read This Story! 

 

-Dok

All Hail the Penguin Empire!


Dark Lord Saga (Original)

By the Power of the Empire! Read this!

I must say that this story is quite nice, the setting of the world is a bit too systematic though and the way the MC can be manipulated although he seems to have strong beliefs.

Besides that it is a very nice story, where you think you know might happen, but then the story takes a sharp turn and you suddenly think... "what now?!" and that is the amazing part.

The style itself needs an up as the world seems too systematical and that can quickly be regarded as "boring"

The story I find nice and original with the different concepts and ideas.

The character development could also use an up on it as they seems to be very easily subjected to change even though they had been committed to another act for the entirety of their life.

Anyways, that is at least what I think of it, so far.

Keep up the good work mate, your story is brilliant!

By the Power of the Empire! Penguins! Read this story!

 

-Dok

All Hail the Penguin Empire!


Immortal Soul

By the power of The Empire! Read this!

I must say that this story is one of the best I have ever read. It is thought out and well written. The author clearly knows where to go with the story, which I for once don’t. Many times stories have “Predictable” plots. Well this one doesn’t. And it is absolutely amazing! The weirdness in this story is top-noch for all of you (even if you don’t admit it – you know it…..) So penguins! By the power that hopefully will be invested in me, READ! THIS! STORY!

*Big applause from fellow penguins*

 

-Dok

All hail the Penguin Empire!


The Gam3

By the power of The Empire! Read this!

This story is very good and very different from your normal VR-story. The setting, the world, the people  and how you play the game, everything is different from the norm - and I love it.

the story is sat in a form of futuristic style, where alien life is found and interacted with, and the game itself is important in this newly found intergalactic setting. In there, there are none of thatfantasy, middleaged setting but a sci-fi style with modern and  ingenious out ofspace styled weapons. 

The MC himslef seems to a total nutcase  and needs constant attention unless you want pure dissaster!

so this story is HIGHLY RECOMMENDED to read! (At least twice!)

 

-Dok

all Hail the Penguin Empire!


Axe from North

This is a seriously good story. The MC is purfect! and the different viewpoints (Yes there is different viewpoints.) really do give it a funny feel to it. What one finds to be gold, another find to be the remnants of a tooth.

now. Read. And... Enjoy!

 

-Dok

All Hail the Penguin Empire!


The Sphere By exorcist

I went full out on this, I first found this on another website, but when I saw it was here I was overjoyed!

This is one of my top favourites and I feel the need to share it to my fellow penguins. The story is brilliant and unique, with a new viewpoint on how another reality could work.

The characters is deep, even the so-called villain is given reason as to why he is the baddie.

This is indeed a read you don't want to miss out on guys!

 

-Dok

All hail the Penguin Empire!


Game of the Mad God

This story is beautifully written, it is clear that the author has given a lot of time into story-line and characterisation, which is brilliant. There is nothing like a story that have a good plot, good reasoning and is stupendously fun to read! This story will surely leave you crackling if not gasping for air as you read along, following our MC as he ventures around in the god forsaken place the Mad God send him to!

Go author!

 

-Dok

All Hail the Penguin Empire!


Underpowered

Definitely worth a read!

This is definitely worth a read, it is fun in a way you wonder why other authors don’t write like this; well that is probably because of the personallity it takes to read it!

if one have a slight idea about them being insane, read this! It will be your Comrades in arms! MUHAHAHAHAHHA!

-Dok

All Hail the Penguin Empire!


The Fragile Monster Lord

Follow our protagonist with is frail glass like body as he by mistake let himslef get taken to another World  where he has to give it his all to survive, will he make it, or will his fragile body quit on him midway  through? How will his powers, granted by  the very thing that took him help him in his survival? Find out in The Fragile Monster Lord’s world!
keep up the good work mate!
-Dok