God Of The Realms
Its such an interesting concept, but the gramma is bad, i hate to let myself limit jusrt because of bad grammer, but i just cant take it. The author needs an editor.
This is gooood. Lol like i really like this story it is A Nice new kind of story... by that i mean that it happends in the 21. Century, instead of in the middel ages! It is not A fantasy World but! A modern Day World not a sci-fi world, Well not yet anyways... with all the new stuff he is inventing.
This xianxia story is one of the best stories I have read so far! And i have read quite a few! I really like the hole other dimension home thingy!
The mc is also great! He is thoughtful and his mental development is also well written! Although I find the puppets development a bit lacking, it is to be expected From a relatively new writer.
The grammar is perfect! In the sense that I maybe spot one gramma fail or so per chap, it is usually a typing error like the k in 'like' is moved forward once like this 'lkie'. The gramme In this story is much better than most stories here on royalroadl.
Overall I just think this story is amazingly good!... however... there is one problem.... THE AUTHOR FUCKING DROPPED IT!!!!!! GOD I AM MAD AT HIM (or her) DAMMIT DONT JUST DROP IT LIKE THAT!!!
Just because there were some stupid idiots who didn't like the story and kept criticizing it and calling this story, shit! God I want to kill them! What a bunch of assholes...
Sorry about that I just had to get all that rage out of my system... I am feeling much better now... actually not.. now I am just sad because the story is getting dropped... please start writing it again...
Oh and Xamd look at your overall rating... it is very good for a story, most stories have 3-4 stars... u have 4 and a half! That is better than mearly all the stories I read!
well that was my review... just please start writing this story again... please... oh! And Btw I just wrote this after reading your message...
oh! And btw again! I personally can't see how people would think this story is shit... and I didn't see anyone in the comments saying so... did they pm u or what?
And again. Please start writing this story again! I am begging u! We'll see ya later... hopefully u will have a new chapter our by then... if not I will slaughter your family and everyone u care about...
- God of the realms...
why did U have to destroy this Master piece like this?
i have read Halfways through chapter 3 and I can't force myself to read any more and my stormach churn when I read this there is a couple of reasons:
1. The way u write the story makes it hard to follow. It like u are missing half that is happening because of the poetic way u have written this story.
2. The mc is not only unrealistic resistant to flames, but he is also very calm in a situation where his parents dies. I mean his first reation to his carriage just suddenly exploding in flames is to run in and save his parents? Just ignoring the flames and somehow dragging his parents out of the carriage walking through flames suffering no wounds or burns.
3. The mc is forgiveness incarnated, I mean his parents fled from somewhere to give him freedom and on his mothers deathbed she says he should be free and live his life well. And yet the next day he is captured by slavers and being branded as a slave there by taking the freedom his parents sacrificed themselves for away from him. And he doesn't even hate them he actually seems to be getting along with them, which does not make sense si ce he is just a 12 year old boy and those people just took away what his dead parents sacrificed themselves for.
4. When u are reading this it feels like u are reading this blind. By that I mean there is no description of his surroundings. From reading those 2 and a half chapters this is what I know about he appeance of the persons involved: dad: jet black hair mom: n/a mc: he is 12, Jase: n/a Rahuul?: n/a cavil: very thin and old. His surroundings: he is in a forest on a road. There are remains of his carriage, the slavers carriage is also on the road, there are campfires with people around, the graves of his parents.
Great story thanks for taking the time to write it:)
will wait for more chapter to give a final review.
I really like your story Theres is just one thing i am confused about the proluge i didt get who said what and who was that adventure and woman and shadow it was just confusing but it was good. :D keep up the good work. :D