BookWorm84

BookWorm84

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Fictions
Reviews
BreakDown

Just read this. Easy top 20 on RRL.

5/5 grammer

5/5 plot

7/5 character development

7/5 character conversations

5/5 pacing

5/5 plot armor (there wasn’t any, cept literally that one time)

5/5 ... just friggin read this already. Why isn’t this an example of how to write LITRPG somewhere in the news or facebook or whereever? 

This was a great ride. Worth your time.


The Misr Effect:  Key of Life

Linny... don't you dare stop.  This thing is amazing!

MOAR!!! (Please)


Insania Online

Fairly exceptional world.

This was a regularly updated story on an epic level similar to LMS. The idea was quite unique and fun. The plot is well crafted and plods along like most LITRPGs...sorta about the MC and how they overcome stuff and not too much based on the hero cycle like traditional fiction/writing.

-1 star for grammar but its not the worst I've seen. Just not the best either. Small typos that let it stay readable but could be structured much better.

Supporting cast are unique and well written. MCs quirks are not too annoying and believable to a point. Reminds me of a few people I know.

Story is now updated infrequently but I suspect the author might be getting back into it. 


Fantasy Online: Hyperborea

Read this. It won't waste your time. This author set this within his universe created in part by his other series "The Loop" (also worth reading). Hilarious characters. Great storyline. You will enjoy this.

This universe is set in virtual, steampunk, fantasy, and futuristic settings. The main plot is set in a fantasy world that allows items from other "settings" except for those which use restricted mechanics which in turn cause self-damage.  Its a well thoughtout LITRPG world scene and I am thoroughly enjoying this unique take on the genre.

5/5 in all catagories. No real detractors noted for anything mechanical to the story, pace, or development. I felt that it moved along nicely and easily. Its a fun read.

Critique:

Certain stat edits should be revisited and checked against the text. Caught 2 errors total (in like 14 chapters so...like professional level good).

Illegal mechanic inducing items should show their feedback damage to the user more clearly. I understand it from your other books, but I felt the total picture was slightly underclear.

I will be following this eagerly. 


The Eagle's Flight

Epic, Professional Quality Story!

Don't be misled by the low chapter count. Each chapter is close to 10k or more words.

This is my initial review:

Character development 5/5

This is real fantasy writing. The world is developed and interactive. This story does not seem to rely on an overpowered MC and instead is introducing each pawn and piece as a connected puzzle. Well done and I am enjoying the character interactions in-spite of a slower opening than some might choose.

Grammar 5/5

Can I score this 10/5? Found 1 error in 20k words. This is professionally edited level of work.

Story 5/5

I thought about knocking it for a slow start but then realized that I was still sucked in. All the exciting elements are developing (War, Politics, Greed) and by the end of even the first chapter it begins to come together in a rather fun way.

Style 5/5

Some will dock this part becuase of pacing. I find I do not mind its slower start and epic level story telling. Give it a shot, it might surprise you. (I am, however, a fast reader.)

 

Good luck to the author! Keep the posts coming.

 

Critique:

It might help to seperate point of view shifts into their own smaller chapters to break up the flow. I found my attention drifting for a monent at each transition because I didn't always catch the POV shift. (Totally common for nearly every story.)

Sp? X1 (Practice not practise).

Beautiful descriptions. Sometimes the tone can be majority-passive so be careful with that.

Practice fight scene showed good promise with fight scripting. Looking forward to see how you handle skirmishes and wars.


Medic!~

This is a great read. The author needs to push for a finish and then style it in small short stories maybe 30-40k words each or so.

Their style is perfect for that kind of short story fun.


Underworld - Level Up or Die!

Chapter 6 and its got me hooked.  Great start, action right away.  

 

Great Grammar.  
Character development is nice.  Not too over the top. I like the loner MC types over others.  Interactions with the others provides decent amusement and a bit of fleshing out of characters.  

I'll try and rerate this when it gets to the end of a major story arc or the end of "book 1" whenever that might be.  Meantime, this is worth your effort to save to a reading list.


Emerilia

Original. Well Thought out. Awesome Start.

Don't stop!  Keep them chapters coming!  Love what you've done with the plot and setup.  

 

I like your MC and his talents.  I am looking forward to new chapters and learning about the world, stats, and mechanics.  


Loser of Tarinath

Must Read. A Top 10 Story here at RRL

Just sit down, dedicate a weekend and finish this masterpiece to its current chapter.  You won't regret it.

 

Witty, clever, well thought-out (even if you didn't plan it purposefully Zap), and honest.  This story will have you flipping "pages" and wanting MOAR!

 

5/5 in all aspects.  This is the first story I've reviewed to have received a 5/5 score.  Could be published with minimal editing and formatting.


Alistair’s Great and Powerful Startup Dungeon

Worth reading.  Minimal grammatical and typo errors.  Well laid out plot and progression.  Fun fight scenes and actual risk (no automatic wins here).