Ankur_93

Ankur_93

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Crawling Towers

Plot driven but lacking characters.

Despite what I say below, this is an innovative story and definitely worth reading. I usually don't leave un-solicited reviews but as I liked the story, I write below to help the author. You have done a good job! 

That being said, if a story were a person, then the plot would be the skeleton, characters the flesh and world-building the skin.

This story has the first in abundance, the third in moderation but almost nothing in characters, except MC.

Side characters are not even one dimensional, their existence is basically non-existent. You could replace them with a stone and you wouldn't find any difference.

For example:

1. MC is way too prepared for what happens but no one comments on it.

It is hinted that one person is either a transmigrator or something along the lines. He mumbles something along the line of 'I crossed' and MC hears it, so do the others. But what do they all do?  Zilch. That's what.

The leader of their group is a teenager who shrugs off the destruction of their world like it was just another Sunday morning. Not a Monday morning, mind you, Mondays are hectic. This obviously hints at something deeper, but what do the MC and the rest of the side characters do? Absolutely nothing.

2. None of the others are traumatised by the ending of the world. Not a single one. They accept everything as true and work towards it. Family? What family? Dreams and aspirations? What are they? Goals? Does such a thing exist?

3. MC keeps pocketing random stuff in front of everyone to use later. They could be useful for everyone but no one comments on them. 

4. MC steals valuable stuff from the shared pile but again, not a single mention of it is made by the others.

If characters could be improved upon, this would a very interesting novel.


Void Breaker

Couldn't find anything cut stars for.

There is very little I can say that'd add anything to the novel. The story is that good. I will not be minutely surprised when I see this story is the top ten of the trending list.
Coming onto the scoring:
Style: Exceptionally done. The author is well adept at conveying the character's emotions and making the readers feel them as well. The descriptions are well placed and not too much. The pacing is fast; the author doesn't care to show to each and every single fight that the MC goes through; an excellent thing in my opinion.
Story: While system apocalypse is an overdone genre, the author has managed to keep the story fresh. I like the way system is implemented and the little details that have been scattered across the story. I especially liked the bit with the MC raising all dehydrated and why it was so, which gets explained later on.
Grammar: Not much to say. At no point did I feel hindered by grammar.
Character: Now this is the star of the story. The MC is very well defined. All her goals are clear, her desires are laid bare and so is her drive. Not only this but she is also consistent with her actions. A huge plus in my book.
Overall, this has an incredible beginning. While writing this I tried to think for reasons to not give this story a full-on 5-star rating but I couldn't think of any, so good job.


Tale of Family - Book 1 - WIP

Quite an off heading for the review of a VRMMO story, isn’t it? Well, its because this story is less about the MMO and more about the people, both in the real world and the virtual. We all have read VRMMOs that had AI NPCs yet they don’t seem to matter in the grand scheme of things. Well, this is not one of those stories.
For all intents and purposes, the virtual world is a bright new world for the people to explore. It is not just a fantasy adventure trap but a VRMMO that forces its users to treat the NPCs as actual people. The author has found a brilliant method of doing this by binding a thinking NPC with the gamers and forcing them to interact with the inhabitants of the new world. Not only that, but the gamers have to keep this NPC alive as it can die just like them.
That being said, the style of the story takes some getting used to. The constant back and forth are a bit disorienting but it is an artistic choice. And the reason why the author chose this style becomes clear in the next few chapters and I ended up agreeing with the author’s decision.
The grammar is good and at times needs a touch help but it is not something that Grammarly can’t fix. The character development of the MC was also nicely done, especially her arrival in the new world and her reaction to it. Overall, this is a nice story and I would recommend giving it a try.


Montgomery and Carano

More than just a tragic romance.

No matter what the blurb paints the story as this novel is more than what it promises to be. While the premise is still the classic tale of tragedy, the story has much more to it and I am not talking about just magic. There are demons, fae, vampires and necromancers in this story, which elevate it quite a bit.
However, the main plot of the story seems to be focused on tracking and catching a thief who has been terrorising the world for about 200 years. Yes, you read that right. Two hundred. Truthfully, I like the epic-ness of the idea. 
The story starts with a fight between the younger generation of the 2 families, inspired by the classic, but the story soon spins from there as the fight is magical in nature. Fire burns and the shadow dog bites and all that good stuff. It slowly shifts away from the politics of the family the actual plot in a very natural way, something which I like.
The world-building in the story is done quite well and each chapter brings with it a piece of the world to study and observe. This creates for a great writing style. The grammar was quite good and the scenes flowed into one another, making it an easy read. The characters also seemed to possess their own personalities and differed from one another, a great plus in my book.
If I had to point out one thing, I’d say that the chapters are a bit wordy. But perhaps it is a result of etching world-building into it. Still, this does not detract one from the story so all is good. Overall, this is a good read and I’d recommend reading it.
 

Stitched

It hurts to read but I can't stop!

When the author tags this story with Psychological and Horror tags, you better believe them. This is a story that messes with you emotionally with every chapter. Every scene is a fight for survival, not only against the world but also against one's own memories, morals and guilt.

The best part about this story is that it does not start with the genesis of the apocalypse. Instead, it starts quite a time after and we learn of the horror that event brought through the haunted memories of the MC and hellish scenario she escaped from.

I also like that the MC has a goal other than just getting powerful, which keeps the MC quite grounded and keeps them going. The MC's character is easily the strongest suit of the novel. The grammar is quite good while the style of writing is rather haunting. Perfect for a grimdark story like this one. 

This story is a beautiful look into a traumatised human psyche within an apocalyptic world. The struggle of the MC against her values is nerve wrecking and does not feel dramatic or cliched. It is handled beautifully. The MC knows what she has to do to survive, despite it being against her morals. Yet, she does it as she cries but she can't move on from her actions. Her confession in the initial chapters is a beautiful example of this.

Overall, this is an amazing story. So, do give it a read. It will tear your heart apart to make room for itself.


Vylt: The New Dawn
This novel is not what you would expect from a novel of this genre. As rather than being an apocalypse novel, it seems to be taking the approach towards the slow integration of magic. The way magic is introduced into the world is also quite interesting as it is not through System or some grand event but through a virus which has a very low infection rate.
This Virus changes people into mutants or changes their race into fantasy ones while granting them access to magic. However, as much time has not passed since the resurgence of magic, the field is greatly unexplored.
The prologue of the story is also interesting. It is a scene from the VMMRPG, which seems odd at first glance. However, as the story progresses, it seems like the prologue has a much deeper meaning than originally assumed. Maybe it hints at the magic that the MC will possess. We will have to wait and see.
As far as grammar is concerned, I have no complaints. The characters are also quite believable. In the initial chapters, you would question some of MC’s actions but the reason for those becomes apparent soon after, leaving you wondering at the brilliance of the author. Overall, this is a good novel. 

No More Respawns
Although this is the story about a party of people who are stuck in a rather dire situation, it never feels so. Instead, it feels as if the god Andy is the protagonist, despite only appearing in the initial chapters. We clearly see him break the 4th wall and talk about things that he should not. This wall breaking is done in such a way that it gives a comedic element to the scene, instead of disturbing the flow of the story.
As for the 5 people that are struck with the contract for which they sold their souls, they feel more like paws dancing to the tunes of the god whose intentions seems impure. 
The thing that I like the most about this novel is that it is very self-aware. It knows what its shortcomings are and instead of shying away from them, the author has used his brilliance to turn them into plot points. I mean that author has used shitty personalities of the NPC’s as a plot point. How amazing is that?
The grammar is quite good. I have no complaints. The characters each have their own set personalities and funnily enough, they are given jobs according to their personalities.  The style is easy to read and the story has great potential waiting to be realized. Can’t wait for more!

The Primal Hunter
This is a story of coming to grips with the reality that you no longer recognise. It is also a story of someone who has to accept themselves for who they are before they could unlock their full potential and completely blossom. 
While still in its beginning stages, the story follows the MC who is just a regular joe working a 9-5 job. However, as the world turns upside down, we get to see the guy outside of that time frame. We get to know his history and his lost-passion. We see him embrace his passion with open arms and accept the consequences that came with it.
The MC is an introvert and we actually get to see this. It is not like those cases where MC is supposed to be an introvert but is the most likeable person around. If you look closely, you’d see how the situation could have been handled better but the MC didn’t because of his lack of people skills.
The world-building is fairly decent at this point, but it hints at larger things in play. Why is there a tutorial?? Who set it up? What happens to the world while humans are gone? All these questions are left to be answered later.
Grammar is fairly good and the sentences flow nicely. The dialogues are natural, which is a plus point. Overall, this is a good novel.

The Fragmented Six (Six Chances)
This feels like a story that is less about the people in it and more about the world that they live in. The author seems to have a larger goal that is to create a world that is larger than the story itself. Perhaps this image is the result of the various characters that we encounter in the story. Or perhaps it is the effect of the beautiful world-building, I am uncertain.
However, one thing is quite clear. And that is that the author has put quite a lot of effort in detailing the background of the world and the history whose lingering effect we see in the present time within the novel. The politics of the current time has its roots in the previous wars and their resulting aftermath, as is true in the real world. 
The magic system also seems quite unique with the use of conductors and the vitae which is quite different from the usual mana route. With the existence of the Vitae reserves, the author has brilliantly built wars around them to etch rich history.
Talking about grammar, the story was wonderful to read. The characters, despite being quite numerous, were all quite different and interesting. They had their own goals and motivations and more independently of each other. Overall, this was quite a nice read.
 

Angel's Dirge

Interesting take on Angels.

Unlike any other story that have read, this story does not consider the angels as a force of all that is good and holy. Instead, they are the force that has descended down on earth to achieve our destruction and annihilation. Quite interesting isn’t it?
The story starts with the main character spending a mundane day with her best friend. This scene sets up the protagonist’s character, her faults, her virtues and her problems. Mainly her status as an orphan, her anger management issues and a background in the local juvenile system. Not your regular goody two shoes, is she?
The story progresses well from there, however, it leaves quite a few questions behind. Just what are these angels? What are their goals? Why are they attacking humans? And why did the local governments do nothing against them until now? These questions also seem to haunt the main character. This implies that the author has answers for them and is only waiting to reveal them at a proper time. This hints at the deep roots of the story, something I like very much.
If there was one thing, however, it would be the pace of the story and the length of the later chapters. The later chapters feel like they are just a singular scene when a chapter should be more than just a single scene. If those two issues could be mitigated, then this novel would be A+.