MintyMintyMilkTea

MintyMintyMilkTea

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Reviews
Mundus Subcavus - or:

It's still a bit early for me to get a good sense of this story, but so far it's an interesting adventure story with well thought out explanations for this story's natural laws and phenomena. 

Style: This story is written in first-person, which can be difficult to get right. So far I think the author is handling it well. My only quibble is more could be done with this first-person perspective. Right now it could be changed to the third person limited and we wouldn't miss much. Hearing more of the MC's opinions and having a stronger "voice" would help. 
 
Story: I think there's more important story beats coming up, but so far we get to the main premise quickly and know the basic goals of the characters. There's no prolonged info dumping and in the last few chapters there's been decent action. My favorite part has been the scientific explanations of the geology and this world's magic system. I'm looking forward to more.
 
Grammar: The author has a good sense of grammar, but there are a couple of typos and a couple of unclear sentences. Nothing major, just a few edits would help.
 
Character: Again, it's hard to judge with just 7 chapters, but the characters are starting to become more fleshed out. We've got a little bit of backstory and character moments to distinguish the MC, but I still need more to get a better opinion on him. As the story progresses I think we will learn more about the MC and the other characters.
 
Overall, this is a good start. The world is thought-out and the unique perspective on geology and magic is interesting. I'm excited to read more.

Phantom Ddraig

Nice high fantasy in need of editing

The base of Phantom Ddraig is well thought out. I love the mix of Arthurian legend with sci-fi space battles. There's an epic plot, fleshed-out characters, and an interesting setting. It just needs a lot of editing for those things to shine through. 

Style: (3.5 stars) The third person limited POV is handled well. We switch viewpoints to other characters in some chapters, but the switch is obvious and not confusing. However, the overall flow of the story is hampered by run-on sentences, unnecessary details, and information dumps. Some of the descriptions are great and add to the overall feel of the story. But some information about side characters and abilities could be shown rather than told. The passive voice is also used a lot. 

My advice is to shorten or break up most sentences. At least have a variety of sentence structures. Try to not start each sentence with the same word. Also, reconsider the use of had, was, being, and have been. These words can indicate the passive voice and add to the wordiness of the sentence.

Story: (4.5 stars) So far I've read up to the end of the first volume, and there is a decent plot and progression to the story. There are clear goals and stakes for the characters. Many of the secondary characters have their own plotlines we get to see play out. The climax to volume one was well set up and exciting to read. 

Grammar: (3 stars) Let me start off by saying the writing is readable and even well written in certain parts. But there are a frustrating amount of typos and repeated grammar mistakes. Many mistakes could easily be solved by Grammarly or the Microsoft Word editor. There are a lot of lowercase "I"s to the point where I was second-guessing myself and wondering if there was a significance to it. Almost every sentence is a run-on that could be split into 2 or 3 sentences. I found myself having to reread a lot sentences. I think spending some time with a free online grammar editor could make this story much more readable.

Characters: (5 stars) Each character feels unique and is nicely fleshed out. The dialog between characters helps add to their personality. Despite the multitude of characters, everyone was easy to distinguish and remember. 

Overall, I think there is a good story here. It just needs some work to unbury that potential.


Runes & Brews

Great World-Building Slight Slice of Life

The first chapter really hooked me. I loved the MC and all the unique spells, classes, and races. As another review mentioned, the story does seem a bit slow, but to me it's still an interesting read.

Style: Clean and consistent third person. Everything makes chronological sense and all the dialog is easy to follow.

Story: The story starts off with Theo the MC opening an alchemy/enchanting shop in a new town. There's some conflict with the city's merchant guild and a romantic subplot, but it seems like those might have already reached their conclusions(?) So far there's not a big dramatic conflict driving the story. The main goal for the MC is keeping his shop open and helping out his love interest's adventurer party. Not bad goals, but it seems different than the synopsis promised. Maybe things will change as the story goes on.

Overall the story seems more Slice of Life than other fast-paced, high-risk stories.  [Edit: There is a Slice of Life tag I missed in the description, so everything makes more sense now] There are good action scenes, but so far a lot of the story has focused on world-building. I love all the thought and detail that's gone into the different character classes and the alchemy of this world. The explanations about enchanted items and potions are interesting to read and make the world rich and believable. I can tell a lot of thought went into the world-building for this story.

Grammar: Not bad. I spotted one or two typos but the author has a good grasp of grammar.

Character: The MC was introduced well and I'm liking his character. We've learned a little bit about his backstory and his motivations. I think he could use a stronger guiding goal or motivation, but maybe we are still building up to that. There are a lot of supporting characters that have unique traits and personalities. Sometimes I feel like some secondary characters change personalities or do things that seem out of character. Maybe as the story goes on their actions will make more sense. 

Runes and Brews has a well-thought-out world that's fun to read. The story isn't the peak of tension, but it's well worth your time if you enjoy great fantasy worlds. I'm looking forward to more.


Stitched

Great Gritty Survival Fantasy

It's been a while since I've read well-written gritty realism. So far Stitched reminds me of a mix of the Hunger Games, The Walking Dead, and my own post-apocalyptic daydreams. There's also a dash of litRPG going on with the MC being able to check her stats and improve her abilities.

Style: Writing in the first-person can be a challenge but I think it works well here. The author handles the MC's inner thoughts and descriptions beautifully. Everything flows nicely and it easy to read (at least in writing style, maybe not psychologically).

Story: There is a clear goal of survival and revenge, but there's also a lot more going on. The author does a good job of balancing explanation with leaving some things unexplained to keep you wanting to read more. There is some backstory and information about this post-apocalyptic world, but nothing is information-dumped. Around chapter 9 or 10 things get a little repetitive with fighting off scabs again and again, but I can feel the author is building up to something. I think everything has been laid out in the background so everything comes together later.

Grammar: No mistakes found. Great grasp of grammar.

Character: Well fleshed out MC. I think it will be interesting to see her character growth. She has a strong backbone and is someone you want root for. I'm interested to see how she grows her stitched ability. 

Overall, I'm really enjoying this story. Don't let the horror tag scare you off. You're going to miss out on a great story!


System Change

Enjoyable read so far. True to its name, System Change involves the MC changing from one game-like system to another system. So far it's well-written and well thought out. The first chapter starts with a post-apocalyptic game system vibe, but then we switch into an isekai feeling story with villages and nobles.

I'm interested to see where this story will go. No major style or grammar issues so far. A few paragraphs could be split up more in my opinion but in general, everything is formatted well.  

It looks like the author has put a lot of thought into the leveling and exp system which is fun to see. The wall of stats and titles in the first chapter was a little intimidating, and honestly I didn't read them at first. But the following chapters made me want to go back and read it. All the class descriptions and skill explanations have also been fun to read and think about.

I always have mixed feelings about OP characters, they can be fun to read at first but they can get boring quickly. It can be difficult to write compelling character growth and arcs if they've already reached the top. Of course, it can be done. I think this story has the potential to remain interesting with the new system to figure out and maybe stronger adversaries. 

The MC's personality is fleshed out and his character stays consistent. I'm enjoying his carefree yet annoyed attitude. The secondary characters could use more depth.  So far the people we have met in the second system world are a little stereotypical, but I think this might change as the story goes on and we learn more. 

Great start. Looking forward to more!