Re: What is love, no, really.

#21

DrunkMinstrel Wrote: And then there is the one that start off really sweet and then crash and burn because the wife is a girl that is a party girl and a career woman.
Party girl? Career woman!? Oh gimme gimme gimme gimme.

I don't care if she has a dozen blue-suit execs wrapped 'round her pretty finger.

So long as she comes home to me.

🎼🎶  She likes to shake her ass. She grinds it to the beat.
                     She likes to pull my hair when I make her grit her teeth.
                     I like to strip her down. She's naughty to the end.

                     No doubt about it. She's a bad, bad girlfriend.

😸

Re: What is love, no, really.

#24
There's a lot of different ways to love. And what's more, reading about them is always a minefield. Because a lot of people think love has to be a certain way, or it is not 'healthy'. 

I'm not advocating to be tolerant of abuse, or saying that people *cannot* have unhealthy relationships with each other. But there is a darker side to love. Love is not merely being happy to see another person happy. Love is when you are sublimely happy to see another person happy because *you* made them happy. There's a certain possessiveness there, the idea that you are somehow special to them. And there's a certain fear, and even terror and horror that lies beneath it. Deep love, after all, is exactly what's going to shatter your soul if you ever somehow *lose* the person you love. It's why trust is so important; you need to know you're special to them, and they need to know they are special to you. You're playing with fire, when you love, because love, the exact same thing that makes you feel so happy when you're with someone, is precisely what will destroy you if they were hurt, or killed, or if it turns out they never loved you as much as you loved them. 

Re: What is love, no, really.

#25

CloverCloverClover Wrote: There's a lot of different ways to love. And what's more, reading about them is always a minefield. Because a lot of people think love has to be a certain way, or it is not 'healthy'. 

I'm not advocating to be tolerant of abuse, or saying that people *cannot* have unhealthy relationships with each other. But there is a darker side to love. Love is not merely being happy to see another person happy. Love is when you are sublimely happy to see another person happy because *you* made them happy. There's a certain possessiveness there, the idea that you are somehow special to them. And there's a certain fear, and even terror and horror that lies beneath it. Deep love, after all, is exactly what's going to shatter your soul if you ever somehow *lose* the person you love. It's why trust is so important; you need to know you're special to them, and they need to know they are special to you. You're playing with fire, when you love, because love, the exact same thing that makes you feel so happy when you're with someone, is precisely what will destroy you if they were hurt, or killed, or if it turns out they never loved you as much as you loved them.


I think you absolutely nailed why I felt this triangle theory felt so flat to me. Like a Mary Sue of theories, it's missing a certain human element of flaw. Love is often pretty selfish, especially young love. The triangle might be more true for a mature relationship between people who have figured things out for a few decades, but it's not necessarily going to be so true in that lovey dovey honeymoon phase where that perfect person is basically ones whole world and you feel empty because they went to see their family for a weekend or something. 

Re: What is love, no, really.

#26
Here is the thing though, since it is different for everyone then you cant really quantify it as you don't love me more than I love you, or I don't love you as much as you do. How do you actually weigh love? It is not possible so it is silly to try to measure it.

Which is why I hate hearing people argue over it, like 'oh you don't love me' you can't tell me how to love, your love is different than mine.