Re: Free First Chapter Feedback!

#401

ArthurScott Wrote: I've actually review-swapped with you on ScribbleHub, I'm pretty sure. And I've entered in the same thread, IDK if you remember me haha. 

Anyway, I'm down for this! Link is here!

Mmm. I've done like three review swaps in my life and only one on Scirbblehub and I don't remember you. I looked through your stories posted here, did you have something there that you didn't upload here? Like a typical Joseph Campbell fantasy? Anywho

Would keep reading. 

That was quite nice. I didn't find the whole amenesiatic start to be very gripping or interesting, but everything was solid and I think the base premise seemed fun. Granted, I'm a sucker for those "games where one person can win stories," and I'm doing one myself lol. So yeah, good all around could just maybe use some setup structurally, unless you intend to do it out of order with flashbacks or what have you. Cool cover too. 

Re: Free First Chapter Feedback!

#403

StgBria Wrote:
ArthurScott Wrote: I've actually review-swapped with you on ScribbleHub, I'm pretty sure. And I've entered in the same thread, IDK if you remember me haha. 

Anyway, I'm down for this! Link is here!

Mmm. I've done like three review swaps in my life and only one on Scirbblehub and I don't remember you. I looked through your stories posted here, did you have something there that you didn't upload here? Like a typical Joseph Campbell fantasy? Anywho

Would keep reading. 

That was quite nice. I didn't find the whole amenesiatic start to be very gripping or interesting, but everything was solid and I think the base premise seemed fun. Granted, I'm a sucker for those "games where one person can win stories," and I'm doing one myself lol. So yeah, good all around could just maybe use some setup structurally, unless you intend to do it out of order with flashbacks or what have you. Cool cover too.

It's the guy that did FROST (I changed the cover of the story so that's probably why you don't remember). 


I assume by structure you mean a prologue etc? Like something before? Surprised

Re: Free First Chapter Feedback!

#404

ArthurScott Wrote:
StgBria Wrote:
ArthurScott Wrote: I've actually review-swapped with you on ScribbleHub, I'm pretty sure. And I've entered in the same thread, IDK if you remember me haha. 

Anyway, I'm down for this! Link is here!

Mmm. I've done like three review swaps in my life and only one on Scirbblehub and I don't remember you. I looked through your stories posted here, did you have something there that you didn't upload here? Like a typical Joseph Campbell fantasy? Anywho

Would keep reading. 

That was quite nice. I didn't find the whole amenesiatic start to be very gripping or interesting, but everything was solid and I think the base premise seemed fun. Granted, I'm a sucker for those "games where one person can win stories," and I'm doing one myself lol. So yeah, good all around could just maybe use some setup structurally, unless you intend to do it out of order with flashbacks or what have you. Cool cover too.

It's the guy that did FROST (I changed the cover of the story so that's probably why you don't remember). 


I assume by structure you mean a prologue etc? Like something before? Surprised

What was frost about. . . 

Actually disregard that. I was considering it using other structures and was ignoring that amnesia had some unique quirks in the story telling. All good. 

Re: Free First Chapter Feedback!

#405

StgBria Wrote:
ArthurScott Wrote:
StgBria Wrote:
ArthurScott Wrote: I've actually review-swapped with you on ScribbleHub, I'm pretty sure. And I've entered in the same thread, IDK if you remember me haha. 

Anyway, I'm down for this! Link is here!

Mmm. I've done like three review swaps in my life and only one on Scirbblehub and I don't remember you. I looked through your stories posted here, did you have something there that you didn't upload here? Like a typical Joseph Campbell fantasy? Anywho

Would keep reading. 

That was quite nice. I didn't find the whole amenesiatic start to be very gripping or interesting, but everything was solid and I think the base premise seemed fun. Granted, I'm a sucker for those "games where one person can win stories," and I'm doing one myself lol. So yeah, good all around could just maybe use some setup structurally, unless you intend to do it out of order with flashbacks or what have you. Cool cover too.

It's the guy that did FROST (I changed the cover of the story so that's probably why you don't remember). 


I assume by structure you mean a prologue etc? Like something before? Surprised

What was frost about. . . 

Actually disregard that. I was considering it using other structures and was ignoring that amnesia had some unique quirks in the story telling. All good.

It was the book about a disease in Canada. Snowy weather. Your response was that it was well written but you weren't interested contextually. Along those lines. XD

Re: Free First Chapter Feedback!

#406

ArthurScott Wrote:
StgBria Wrote:
ArthurScott Wrote:
StgBria Wrote:
ArthurScott Wrote: I've actually review-swapped with you on ScribbleHub, I'm pretty sure. And I've entered in the same thread, IDK if you remember me haha. 

Anyway, I'm down for this! Link is here!

Mmm. I've done like three review swaps in my life and only one on Scirbblehub and I don't remember you. I looked through your stories posted here, did you have something there that you didn't upload here? Like a typical Joseph Campbell fantasy? Anywho

Would keep reading. 

That was quite nice. I didn't find the whole amenesiatic start to be very gripping or interesting, but everything was solid and I think the base premise seemed fun. Granted, I'm a sucker for those "games where one person can win stories," and I'm doing one myself lol. So yeah, good all around could just maybe use some setup structurally, unless you intend to do it out of order with flashbacks or what have you. Cool cover too.

It's the guy that did FROST (I changed the cover of the story so that's probably why you don't remember). 


I assume by structure you mean a prologue etc? Like something before? Surprised

What was frost about. . . 

Actually disregard that. I was considering it using other structures and was ignoring that amnesia had some unique quirks in the story telling. All good.

It was the book about a disease in Canada. Snowy weather. Your response was that it was well written but you weren't interested contextually. Along those lines. XD

You sure it wasn't a first chapter feedback like this thread?

Re: Free First Chapter Feedback!

#407

StgBria Wrote:
ArthurScott Wrote:
StgBria Wrote:
ArthurScott Wrote:
StgBria Wrote:
ArthurScott Wrote: I've actually review-swapped with you on ScribbleHub, I'm pretty sure. And I've entered in the same thread, IDK if you remember me haha. 

Anyway, I'm down for this! Link is here!

Mmm. I've done like three review swaps in my life and only one on Scirbblehub and I don't remember you. I looked through your stories posted here, did you have something there that you didn't upload here? Like a typical Joseph Campbell fantasy? Anywho

Would keep reading. 

That was quite nice. I didn't find the whole amenesiatic start to be very gripping or interesting, but everything was solid and I think the base premise seemed fun. Granted, I'm a sucker for those "games where one person can win stories," and I'm doing one myself lol. So yeah, good all around could just maybe use some setup structurally, unless you intend to do it out of order with flashbacks or what have you. Cool cover too.

It's the guy that did FROST (I changed the cover of the story so that's probably why you don't remember). 


I assume by structure you mean a prologue etc? Like something before? Surprised

What was frost about. . . 

Actually disregard that. I was considering it using other structures and was ignoring that amnesia had some unique quirks in the story telling. All good.

It was the book about a disease in Canada. Snowy weather. Your response was that it was well written but you weren't interested contextually. Along those lines. XD

You sure it wasn't a first chapter feedback like this thread?

That's what I mean yeah. It was from the same thread but on ScribbleHub :)