Free feedback for first chapters
So first of all, I don't consider myself an expert by any means. However, if there's one thing that I am, I'm a reader, and I know what I like when I read it.
Like most of us here, I write as a hobby and I'm constantly seeking to improve my own work and to understand how to deliver and more interesting and effective story. I absolutely love the magic and the skill that goes into writing truly compelling novels and like a lot of us, wish I had readers explain to me why they do or don't like parts of my story. Originally I had planned on writing full reviews. However, with the time that i have, i wouldn't be able to get to many people. Therefore, in order to get to as many people as I can, I think it's best if I offer my feedback specifically for new author's first chapters.
The first chapter of the novel is absolutely paramount in a web novel. Webnovels, and fiction in general is an incredibly competitive genre, and RoyalRoad is no exception. Therefore, i believe the best thing i can do for you is to let you know why your novel does or doesn't pull me in as a reader. I'll give my honest opinion and let you know why I reacted that way as a reader, and hopefully, with that insight, it'll help you understand that first impression that you're giving to readers other than myself.
That being said, I won't be able to get to everyone, but I'll try to get to as many as i can
Before you reply, here are a couple of notes.
1. Your story must be at least 2 weeks old
2. Because it's only a first chapter review, the minimum word count will only be 1k, however, if i REALLY enjoy your story, I'll keep reading and provide further feedback on other chapters
3. I'm not some god tier author and i don't represent the entirety of the RR readerbase, but I will give you my absolute honest opinion of your story and it's up to you whether or not you'll listen to it or not. If i critique your story, I'm not the be all and end all of whether or not your first chapter is good or not. Listen to all criticism, but don't take it all to heart you feel me?
4. "Why only first chapter?" you might ask. "The real meat of my story isn't until 10 chapters in.". Because here's the lesson that I've learnt when writing my webnovel that I'll need to apply for my next one as well. When someone reads my story, they're giving to me something that's so much more incredibly precious to me than their money, it's their time. My work is competing with anime, video games, youtube, and even porn. PORN I TELL YOU!! So if I want someone to read my work, then it'll have to compete with whatever else is going on in their life and so if a reader has to slog through 20,000 words to get to the good part of your story, then your job as an author is to make sure that the good stuff in your story is happening WAY earlier. Otherwise, it doesn't matter if you've written a masterpiece by midway through, no one's going to get to it to read it.
Hopefully this post doesn't seem condescending, that's not my point. I'm really passionate about reading and even 2 years in I'm barely at the base of the mountain when it comes to writing. But i want to see more people succeed on RoyalRoad and beyond that, I just want to read more wonderful stories.
You can find my own story here, https://www.royalroad.com/fiction/33114/the-master-of-names . If you're skeptical about the quality of my feedback, you can read my first chapter yourself and decide for yourself whether or not you believe that my words would have any value to you.
I'll try to read as many as I can, so leave your links and synopses in the replies below.
Much love, Karingano
A super robot story
Among monsters and men
The Treasure King
A stranger in Sorceror Town
Diaries of a Fighter
The Lost redeemer
Order and Fate
Synopsis: A young wizard journeys through a dark forest. He encounters strange creatures, a witch, and travels to a cursed village.
Edit: Sorry, JUST noticed my story isn't actually quite 2 weeks old yet. Feel free to skip it
Any criticism or compliments you may have in regard to my novel, called DOTS, would be greatly appreciated.
And thank you very much for this most generous act! 😃
I only post short stories, so some of my first "chapters" are under 1k words unfortunately, except for my newest, Destination: Tomorrow (post-apocalyptic lesbian romance), but that's only a few days old on RR.
If not, I totally understand!
This is my novel, https://www.royalroad.com/fiction/35450/the-treasure-king
If you don't mind, please leave some feedback and perhaps a review, thanks!
Thank you for your offer.
This is the link to my story:
It's a thriller (with some subtle supernatural elements, which come into play much later on, some romance too and action) and it takes place in Japan.