An untitled WiP, a terrorist explodes & is transferred...

The premise is as in the title. For this unpublished fantasy work-in-progress I'm calling the protagonist a terrorist, as he screams out a certain phrase in the beginning; yet I'm not saying what nationality or religious background he is -- so I don't want any racism or bigotry in the readers: only the fictional deity who transfers him can dump crap all over the character.

So this guy ends up being sent to another world, in what is an unusual setup, not unlike a dungeon -- except all above-ground. It's a fifty meter radius "bubble" of what appears to be surrounded by open grassland, and that surrounded by other biomes; that means it is one hundred meters across, or 323 feet and some inches. Everything outside of the bubble appears as if hand-drawn and charcoal-shaded drawing (sort of like that one music video from the 80s, "Take On Me"); yet everything inside the bubble is at full color, only it is gray rocky ground. To the south is apparently desert or tundra; on an occasion he can see what looks like a caravan of people and beasts of burden crossing in the distance, from west to east. Just outside the bubble on the east side is a little stream -- so close to fresh water, yet so far. Further east and northeast is open plains leading to gentle hills, with possible signs of habitation farther away yet. Into the north and northeast, grassland falls away to an ocean view, which he presumes is a saltwater ocean. In the immediate west of the bubble, mere hundreds of meters away, a dense forest, from which he can see goblin tribe sentries being dispatched on a nightly detail.

Also, the "ground" in this space has an unusual property: it is firm to the touch like hardened rock, yet springy like a bouncy-castle if you try jumping. So, no grass, no trees, no clear distinction that he will have air to continue breathing, no nothing but a flat space to sit on and wait. He cannot leave this space, things on the outside cannot see in either but they can come in, if they somehow wander into the space on their own.

In the opening narrative, the vengeful deity states he has plans for the space he's sending this failed-terrorist into, that he could care less about the person but what happens to the space and the land around it is an important point. This god takes opportunity to try to drop rocks from the sky on top of this guy, a rather harsh way to send a message and also leave the guy with building materials. It seems the guy is given a rather open-ended mission to fulfill, but for the life of him, he cannot see what it is. (At least, after a woeful admission, the falling rocks cease in their brutality.)

At least in the beginning few chapters I've written, a week into his new life, he will come to have a few starting companions. A slime wanders into the space on its own, and has a rather forced intimate session with him -- and there will be romance and sex. A tribe of goblins in the forest suffer from an orcish raiding party, and ten fleeing goblins are chased from the forest by one lone orc, and seek shelter in his space -- until they get stronger and return to kick some orcish behind.

So he decides he's going to be like a mayor of this little space, and try to build a community -- at least for his own sanity, if not the unknown intent of the deity. One clue the deity leaves is that he could somehow expand the bubble to encompass more land, but no clue just how to do so. Hilarity might ensue; but chaos definitely will, as the deity will not leave him alone to his own devices too long.

That's it for the premise; I'm an accomplished writer in other senses, so I'm not looking for writing tips, but commentary on this writing project is desired.

I'm working on adding to the plot, and finding out whether the plot so far has any theoretical holes in it. Any artful mappers want to take this on, and make a map for it? I'd be pleased if you could. Beyond this I am asking for comments or questions, hints of things you would like to see or not see, or anything which might fill up the general direction I'm taking this story.
New Reply