Everybody Loves Large Chests

by Exterminatus

Original COMPLETED Adventure Comedy Fantasy Satire Anti-Hero Lead Harem LitRPG Magic Non-Human lead Secret Identity
Warning This fiction contains:
  • Gore
  • Profanity
  • Sexual Content

Everybody Loves Large Chests is now available on Amazon and Audible! Featuring lots of editorial love and a more enjoyable reading/listening experience!

Large chests are said to encompass all manner of hopes and dreams. Men covet them. Women envy them. But one fact holds true - everyone wants to get their hands on some big ones.

The same holds true for one intrepid adventurer - a strapping young lad by the name of Himmel. Armed with his grandfather’s trusty longsword and the dream of being the strongest, he sets out on the journey of a lifetime! It is sure to be a long and dangerous road, fraught with danger! And it all starts with a simple test - reach Level 5 in the dungeon called the ‘newbie zone’ and earn the right to become a full-fledged adventurer!

However, such things get hopelessly derailed when his adolescent mind beholds an exposed chest for the first time. A fateful meeting that would inevitably lead his life in a direction he never even dreamed of!

This fiction is written, maintained and owned by Neven Iliev. It is also a participant of the WriTEr's pledge.

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Exterminatus

Exterminatus

Chestiest Chest That Ever Chested

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Table of Contents
Chapter Name Release Date
Prologue ago
Death Comes In Many Forms 1 ago
Death Comes In Many Forms 2 ago
Death Comes In Many Forms 3 ago
Death Comes In Many Forms 4 ago
Death Comes In Many Forms 5 ago
Death Comes In Many Forms 6 ago
Eat And Grow 1 ago
Eat And Grow 2 ago
Eat And Grow 3 ago
Eat And Grow 4 ago
Eat And Grow 5 ago
Eat And Grow 6 ago
Eat And Grow 7 ago
Eat And Grow 8 ago
Eat And Grow 9 ago
Interlude - A Cheap Drink ago
Urges 1 ago
Urges 2 ago
Urges 3 ago
Urges 4 ago
Urges 5 ago
Urges 6 ago
Urges 7 ago
Urges 8 ago
Urges 9 ago
Urges 10 ago
Interlude - A little fisting goes a long way ago
Not a chapter - Q&A ago
Science!!! 1 ago
Science!!! 2 ago
Science!!! 3 ago
Science!!! 4 ago
Science!!! 5 ago
Science!!! 6 ago
Science!!! 7 ago
Science!!! 8 ago
Interlude - Justice demands retribution ago
Gainful Employment 1 ago
Gainful Employment 2 ago
Gainful Employment 3 ago
Gainful Employment 4 ago
Gainful Employment 5 ago
Gainful Employment 6 ago
Gainful Employment 7 ago
Gainful Employment 8 ago
Gainful Employment 9 ago
Interlude - That nagging feeling ago
Chaos 1 ago
Uncertainty 2 ago
Instability 3 ago
Fluctuation 4 ago
Unpredictability 5 ago
Chaos 6 ago
Chance 7 ago
Unforeseen Consequences 8 ago
Coincidences 9 ago
Randomness 10 ago
Volatility 11 ago
Interlude - The Shadow of Death ago
Unleashed 1 ago
Unleashed 2 ago
Unleashed 3 ago
Unleashed 4 ago
Unleashed 5 ago
Unleashed 6 ago
Unleashed 7 ago
Unleashed 8 ago
Unleashed 9 ago
Core Values 1 ago
Core Values 2 ago
Core Values 3 ago
Core Values 4 ago
Core Values 5 ago
Core Values 6 ago
Interlude - A Neighborly Chat ago
Death Comes In Many Shapes 1 ago
Death Comes In Many Shapes 2 ago
Death Comes In Many Shapes 3 ago
Death Comes In Many Shapes 4 ago
Death Comes In Many Shapes 5 ago
Death Comes In Many Shapes 6 ago
Death Comes In Many Shapes 7 ago
Interlude - An ASS out of U and ME ago
Moonlighting 1 ago
Moonlighting 2 ago
Moonlighting 3 ago
Moonlighting 4 ago
Moonlighting 5 ago
Moonlighting 6 ago
Moonlighting 7 ago
Moonlighting 8 ago
Interlude - Good news travels slowly. Bad news has wings. ago
All That Glitters 1 ago
All That Glitters 2 ago
All That Glitters 3 ago
All That Glitters 4 ago
All That Glitters 5 ago
All That Glitters 6 ago
All That Glitters 7 ago
All That Glitters 8 ago
All That Glitters 9 ago
Interlude - Stalking does not count as a long-distance relationship ago
Veni, Vidi, Edi 1 ago
Veni, Vidi, Edi 2 ago
Veni, Vidi, Edi 3 ago
Veni, Vidi, Edi 4 ago
Veni, Vidi, Edi 5 ago
Veni, Vidi, Edi 6 ago
Veni, Vidi, Edi 7 ago
Veni, Vidi, Edi 8 ago
Veni, Vidi, Edi 9 ago
Veni, Vidi, Edi 10 ago
Those Who Are Right 1 ago
Those Who Are Right 2 ago
Those Who Are Right 3 ago
Those Who Are Right 4 ago
Those Who Are Right 5 ago
Those Who Are Right 6 ago
Those Who Are Right 7 ago
Interlude - Barking Up The Wrong Tree ago
Not a chapter - Q&A with the author ago
Snow Day (April Fools chapter) ago
Those Who Are Left 1 ago
Those Who Are Left 2 ago
Those Who Are Left 3 ago
Those Who Are Left 4 ago
Those Who Are Left 5 ago
Those Who Are Left 6 ago
Those Who Are Left 7 ago
Not a chapter - Skill Compendium ago
Those Who Are Left 8 ago
Those Who Are Left 9 ago
Those Who Are Left 10 ago
Interlude - Once is an accident. Twice is coincidence. Three times - a pattern. ago
Hypocrisy 1 ago
Duality 2 ago
Ambiguity 3 ago
Duplicity 4 ago
Mockery 5 ago
Fraud 6 ago
Facade 7 ago
Not a chapter - ELLC World Map ago
Ambiguity 8 ago
Plausible Deniability 9 ago
Omission 10 ago
Underhandedness 11 ago
Subversion 12 ago
Deception 13 ago
Hypocrisy 14 ago
Hypocrisy 15 ago
Interlude - Happy Thoughts ago
Not a chapter - Art Gallery ago
A Hero's Burden 1 ago
A Hero's Burden 2 ago
A Hero's Burden 3 ago
A Hero's Burden 4 ago
A Hero's Burden 5 ago
A Hero's Burden 6 ago
A Hero's Burden 7 ago
A Hero's Burden 8 ago
A Hero's Burden 9 ago
A Hero's Burden 10 ago
Interlude - You Reap What You Sow ago
Upheaval 1 ago
Upheaval 2 ago
Upheaval 3 ago
Upheaval 4 ago
Upheaval 5 ago
Upheaval 6 ago
Upheaval 7 ago
Upheaval 8 ago
Upheaval 9 ago
Upheaval 10 ago
Upheaval 11 ago
Interlude - Another day at the office ago
Services Rendered 1 ago
Services Rendered 2 ago
Services Rendered 3 ago
Not a chapter - Q&A session ago
Services Rendered 4 ago
Services Rendered 5 ago
Not a chapter - A Mimic's hoard ago
Services Rendered 6 ago
Services Rendered 7 ago
Services Rendered 8 ago
Services Rendered 9 ago
Interlude - House Call ago
Winter's Bite 1 ago
Winter's Bite 2 ago
Winter's Bite 3 ago
Winter's Bite 4 ago
Winter's Bite 5 ago
Winter's Bite 6 ago
Winter's Bite 7 ago
Winter's Bite 8 ago
Not a chapter - Art Gallery 2: Electric Boogaloo ago
Winter's Bite 9 ago
Interlude - Professional Courtesy ago
Not a chapter - Best Girl Poll ago
Interlude - An Honest Review ago
Not a chapter - Kindle (re-) Release ago
Knowledge Is Power 1 ago
Knowledge Is Power 2 ago
Knowledge Is Power 3 ago
Knowledge Is Power 4 ago
Knowledge Is Power 5 ago
Knowledge Is Power 6 ago
Knowledge Is Power 7 ago
Knowledge Is Power 8 ago
Knowledge Is Power 9 ago
Knowledge Is Power 10 ago
Knowledge Is Power 11 ago
Interlude - Family Reunions Are Always Awkward ago
Year of the Chest 1 ago
Year of the Chest 2 ago
Year of the Chest 3 ago
Year of the Chest 4 ago
Year of the Chest 4 ½ ago
Year of the Chest 5 ago
Year of the Chest 6 ago
Year of the Chest 7 ago
Interlude - What Friends Are For ago
Mind Games 1 ago
Mind Games 2 ago
Mind Games 3 ago
Mind Games 4 ago
Mind Games 5 ago
Mind Games 6 ago
Interlude - Question Authority ago
Life, Luck, and Lemonade - Birthdays ago
Life, Luck, and Lemonade - Loose Ends ago
Life, Luck, and Lemonade - Blood Money ago
Life, Luck, and Lemonade - Nightmares ago
Life, Luck, and Lemonade - Problems and Solutions ago
Life, Luck, and Lemonade - Forward Thinking ago
Not a Chapter - Amazon book stuff ago
Life, Luck, and Lemonade - Fun & Games ago
Life, Luck, and Lemonade - Stress Kills ago
Life, Luck, and Lemonade - Lemons ago
Life, Luck, and Lemonade - Of Plants and Plots ago
Green Tide 1 ago
Green Tide 2 ago
Not a Chapter - Announcement + Q&A with the author ago
Green Tide 3 ago
Green Tide 4 ago
Green Tide 5 ago
Green Tide 6 ago
Green Tide 7 ago
Interlude - Another Satisfied Customer ago
Birds Of A Feather 1 ago
Birds Of A Feather 2 ago
Birds Of A Feather 3 ago
Birds Of A Feather 4 ago
Birds Of A Feather 5 ago
Birds Of A Feather 6 ago
Birds Of A Feather 7 ago
Birds Of A Feather 8 ago
Interlude - Fish Out of Water ago
Questionable Origins 1 ago
Questionable Origins 2 ago
Questionable Origins 3 ago
Not a Chapter - Fanart Dump ago
Questionable Origins 4 ago
Questionable Origins 5 ago
Questionable Origins 6 ago
Questionable Origins 7 ago
Questionable Origins 8 ago
Questionable Origins 9 ago
Questionable Origins 10 ago
Questionable Origins 11 ago
Interlude - Greed Is Good ago
Not a Chapter - Best Girl Poll 2 ago
Cloak and Dagger 1 ago
Cloak and Dagger 2 ago
Not a Chapter - Few Small Announcements ago
Cloak and Dagger 3 ago
Cloak and Dagger 4 ago
Cloak and Dagger 5 ago
Cloak and Dagger 6 ago
Interlude - Money Talks ago
Connections 1 ago
Connections 2 ago
Connections 3 ago
Connections 4 ago
Connections 5 ago
Connections 6 ago
Connections 7 ago
Connections 8 ago
Interlude - Guardian Angel ago
Not a Chapter - New Art ago
Legacy 1 ago
Legacy 2 ago
Not a Chapter - ELLC Volume 3 is now live on Kindle ago
Legacy 3 ago
Legacy 4 ago
Legacy 5 ago
Legacy 6 ago
Legacy 7 ago
Legacy 8 ago
Interlude - Thicker Than Water ago
What Lies Below 1 ago
What Lies Below 2 ago
What Lies Below 3 ago
What Lies Below 4 ago
Not a chapter - Season's Greetings ago
What Lies Below 5 ago
What Lies Below 6 ago
What Lies Below 7 ago
What Lies Below 8 ago
Interlude - Business As Usual ago
Interlude - Rule of Threes ago
The Mask Falls 1 ago
The Mask Falls 2 ago
The Mask Falls 3 ago
The Mask Falls 4 ago
Interlude - A Day to Remember ago
Not a chapter - Going on break + Author Q&A Part 5: The Empire Strikes Back ago
Greater Heights 1 ago
Greater Heights 2 ago
Greater Heights 3 ago
Greater Heights 4 ago
Greater Heights 5 ago
Not a chapter - Volume 4, Announcements, and fanart ago
Greater Heights 6 ago
Greater Heights 7 ago
Interlude - The Echo of Lies ago
Expanded Normality 1 ago
Expanded Normality 2 ago
Expanded Normality 3 ago
Expanded Normality 4 ago
Expanded Normality 5 ago
Interlude - Off-Season ago
A Whole New World 1 ago
A Whole New World 2 ago
A Whole New World 3 ago
A Whole New World 4 ago
A Whole New World 5 ago
A Whole New World 6 ago
A Whole New World 7 ago
A Whole New World 8 ago
A Whole New World 9 ago
With Strings Cut 1 ago
With Strings Cut 2 ago
With Strings Cut 3 ago
With Strings Cut 4 ago
With Strings Cut 5 ago
Afterword and Q&A ago

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Reviews
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alan lanster
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At first when you see the cover picture and the title and then the sypnosis about an adventurer, you are probably gonna think that it is one of those harem novel which is pretty much no brainer after reading the sypnosis, I thought that too. I came here seeing all those but still read because I didn't have any other thing to read and didn't have much hope for this apparently harem novel. But, then when I read the prologue, I got confused about the apparent MC getting eaten. I thought that it is one of those novels that the MC gets a major powerups after surviving a disaster?  But after I read the next chapter, I almost died laughing too hard.

WitherVoice
  • Overall Score

This story fulfilled a need I didn't even know I had. It's incredibly funny, well written, and... things. I love it so much.

The world would be a better place if everyone read this, and its equally amazing offspring, Small Chests Are Fine Too.

CrAJywood
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That was unexpected for sure! Excellent writing

Almarna
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when one finds themselves traped in a plane that have lost its engine, you start to question the choises of your life.
all around you people are going insane as they wait for the inevetable, as you look around you spot a person hwo seem oddly out of place.
he is just sitting there savoring the lunasy as a fine wine, althewhile eating the biggest icecream cone ever made
"alas i sould never have traveled with bob the house of waffels airline"

unfortunat departed
to the god of death
about his last moment

Raiooku
  • Overall Score
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One of the best stories I've read on RRL

(Slight spoiler!)

Truly, the grammar, the style of writing, and the plot itself are so good! I don't do a lot of reviews, but this story definitely deserves it. At first I couldn't believe it when I saw this story for the first time in high rankings. The picture and title really made me hold off on reading it, on the idea that the MC is just another of those typical horny teenage boys. It was until I was reading a recommendation post about stories with monsters as MCs, that I realized, maybe it was worth checking out after all. And I can tell you, it definitely was!

The_Gentelman
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The tastiest, chestiest story to ever be written.

Spoiler: Spoiler

 

Hilarious and intriguing take on the monster litrpg sub genre, I am eager to see what tasty and not so tasty situations boxxy gets into. Good job mate.

Deathlord876
  • Overall Score

Great Novel To Read For A Quick Laugh

The story is great and the characters are extremely funny.  Just don't let the title fool you.  It one of the best novels involving non-human MC's. 

tomcatfever
  • Overall Score

Singularly the best parody ... Stuff

Horrible story.  Terrifying box.  Don't read this if you dislike parody.

If you enjoy Pratchett or Leiber...  I'm going to buy the book.  Also, the audiobook.

My only disappointment is that Farfrd and Mouser haven't shown up in the Adventure's Guild yet.

Or... maybe Mø¨s´® has.

Hmm.  ß´√´®a¬†˙ø¨¨©˙†s.

PS: The author isn't Pat Rothfus.  But, I'd dig him on the C Team at Acquisitions Incorporated or on D&D Next Podcast. 

Maenorg
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A friend of mine told me about a story of a box that does shit. It sounded like fun and now see what became of me: a being living dependant on the next chapter.

 

It is the first story I read on this site, or online OF in general, and as I already read two others by now it definintely won't be the last.

The story is pretty random, in the beginning more than later on, but it builds up to something. It's not a tolkien-like where you can predict everything, and the author entertains us the same way a joke does: he wants us to make assumptions on what will happen, and then disappoints these assumptions. The disappointment is the unpredictability and therefore what creates the fun.

Grammar. I'm no native english speaker and so I can't really say much about it, but I didn't find that many mistakes, some typos or missing "s"-es and stuff, but all minor mistakes.

Oh the Characters. I got a friend of mine to read this story. I always ask him how far he read, and once he mentions someone I just go 'oh god that one' soooo good, he will.. no i can't tell. Read it. Read more!'

The author has an interesting style. By writing a LitRPG he has so much freedom to create and let people talk the way he wants to. It is an easy to read fantasy story one can identify with as nobody talks unnecessarily swollen.

All in all: I need moar chaptors plox.

Thank you so much

lutexv
  • Overall Score

The title kept me away from this for a long time. When I finally decided to read the reviews, my mind was blown away. When I read the story, I realized that this kind of misdirection jokes occurs all the time in the fiction. Now I love it.