Underworld - Level Up or Die!

by Elorion

A thousand year old succubus has grown tired of devouring men. With the help of a lich lord, she invents a new spell that will allow her to grow more powerful in a much less distasteful manner.

Elorion is just your average high school student lazing around during summer break and thinking about bacon. After a solid gaming session, he removes his VR headset to find a monster waiting to kidnap him.

He wakes to find that he’s not alone. Nineteen other students have also been taken. The last thing he expects happens next. He is given the ability to use magic and level up! There’s a catch. With his dormant talents unlocked he must grow in power to please his new master.

To level up he must face the monsters of the Underworld. If he doesn’t fight he will die. But if he does fight, will he survive?

Note: This book has been published and only 10% of the first few chapters are here on RoyalRoad.com.

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Elorion

Elorion

Level Up or Die!

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Osborn
Overall
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Story
Grammar
Character

Good start but then it gets bad

Well, this story had a promising beginning. A mc with interesting abilities, that gets stronger relatively fast and on his own.

He is able to exploit his skills to get stronger faster than the others, and he also takes some risks to gain new abilities from enemies (which is good). Risk and reward, that's the way to go. Through the story you can see how the mc takes the lead among his companions in both terms of power and treasures/wealth.

Up to here it's good. Unfortunately all that changed at chapter 13, the moment the author decided to turn everyone in the story into completely generic characters with pretty much the same abilities and level. This totaly destroyed the story for me. Why did the mc go through all that trouble to gain his abilities if now eveyone is able to learn all of them without any effort at all? Why did the mc spend all those hours training without sleep to level up if everyone got a ton of free levels now? Why did the mc bothered to safe money from hunting if now everyone got a ton of wealth without doing anything?

Man, the author completely destroyed everything that made the mc good and turned him into "random guy nº 115". If at least his personality were anything to be proud, I could have bothered to read a little more, to see if the story gets any better. But he is one of those socially awkward guys, shy with women and totaly lacking any ruthlesness in general.

So, I expected more from the story. It's a pity, cause it had potential to become good.

Abaddon34
Overall

Really enjoying the re-write. Keep up the good work. 

A well rounded piece with thought out characters and just when you think the MC is ok, along comes something to kick his arse^^.

Good balance and enjoyable story. Well worth it if it goes Amazon.

 

13lack12ose
Overall

I really liked this book, it was a fun read. The story follows Elorion a high school age kid that gets kidnapped away to a underworld type LitRPG world where he is branded along with others and forced to "level up or die" so that the brand he got can transfer energy to the succubus that branded him. The MC is a blue mage and a light mage, meaning that he can gain abilities from monsters that he either sees or had used on him and that he also can heal. As protagonists go he is a bit OP but the author owns that aspect of the character and I really enjoyed Elorion as the hero of the story. One of the things I especially liked was that author refrained from using teenage angst as a plot device/tool for character development that seem to be so common to protagonists in YA novels.

From a technical standpoint the writing and editing were average it is the amount of fun I found the story to be that elevated this book to 4 stars instead of 3. It was easy reading that took me only an afternoon to finish. The biggest editing mistakes IMO were wrong or missing words there were some finicky things like a couple of affect vs. effect level things but one has to really be looking to find them. The last issue I had with the plot in general is that it lacked a MacGuffin there were some vague goals like survival and escape but no larger unifying plot device; it is likely that this will resolve itself in time and Elorion will find a "larger than himself" cause that will become a centralized theme in later installments.

reddir
Overall

This has been fun to read. Its is easy to pick up and get into. It is very much a power-up tale focused on the character aquiring ability. The 'story' is also well written, but its fairly light and mostly background so far. The character are also varied and interesting, but again fairly lightly used. Mainly, it shows the author's imaginative use of powers/abilities.

starmate
Overall

PLEASE CONTINUE THIS story AUTHOR-SAMA

  1. The wait is killing mecry
ncross11
Overall
Style
Story
Grammar
Character

Just read up to ch 19. And now the wait begins. Seriously, this story is fantastic. Read it!

francio
Overall

A Truly Promising Beginning

Maybe it's a bit premature, but I really liked it and can't wait for more! Hope you keep this up! 

Spartanstoryteller
Overall

Great potential and a small suggestion

Keep it up I love this story and I really appreciate how realistic the healing magic is when he is trying to survive I also REALLY love the blue magic that's awesome as hell and I like the way they don't start at level one I never thought of it that way. Now I want to make a little suggestion...make the other survivors a little badass too. Not as epic as the main character who has a serious leg up on them but maybe show off a few intersting characters it would be surprisingly original of you if you did all in all I'm loving this story please keep it up!

nubdog
Overall
Style
Story
Grammar
Character

Ho ho ho Good stuff here

Really good , no bullying just because there are young people , no eliteist assholes or one that openly shows it anyway , not being selfish all being free and easy , god thanks for not bringing real life experiences of angst that other authors include in their works needlessly , or just being parrots copying that from other authors . U sir are someone who can actually see light and knows the principle of "if it can be good , why make it bad?" not just putting in dumb tropes like that to stir up emotions negatively but u can actually do something different , nice job :)

 

Though would be nice to have something truly unique that only the main char has not including his affinity talent , i mean i kinda like the one for all , all for one vibe u have going but even so sometimes i just like a badass unique main char u know :)

catbearpenguin
Overall

Funniest synopsis i have read in awhile but really good read