Gamer

Well... wow. I like this story. Apparently, enough to finally make that account worthwhile.

Oh well. Here's my analysis. I'll copy the format of fleeny13, if you don't mind.

Style - 3.5

As a Gamer story, it automatically merits 4 stars to me - so far, the idea is good, not too cliche yet. Several of the errors in the original manhwa (like building up a skill only to not use it later; nice job on the banker!)  have been evaded, however you have your own mistakes.

For one, you fail to use foreshadowing. Much. While it is indeed in the summary that there is a God, and all that other info, in the story itself there's no warning before the big guy popped up. Likewise, what was possibly foreshadowed failed to turn out as anything important - like the original game itself that was destroyed, other than becoming the Cause of Applied Plebotinium.

Try checking out the terms Chekhov's Gun/Gunman/Gag/Cut/Skill. Being aware of them makes it a lot easier to remember to use them. Also, check out the Asspull as well - some parts of the story verged on using them, which is a big red flag. To put it simply if you don't want to look it up though, just learn on to plan ahead.

Story - 4.0

Story is nice! It's quite original, actually, even if the whole '80 quests; 80 worlds' is a little iffy on the matter. Mate, I liked how you started the story in Earth, where there is no magic available. Made me wonder on how you would change it into the higher pace, and then- blam, didn't see the portal coming.

Though, what I find unsightly is the high amount of unnecessary violence. Especially at the beginning! Sure, you foreshadowed what was going to happen back when the club was mentioned as 'something that could kill a man' before it all happened, but really? Wasn't there any other option, like knocking them out or something?

Then at the current arc - honestly, I also kind of dislike the whole 'berserker' idea, but you sold it to me nevertheless. Not that I had to accept it without grumbling, I assure you. Though, contrary to other people, I actually liked the smaller details, like the whole juggling and playing with magic. It made the fic a little more cheery, especially compared to the whole mass murder scenes...

I sure hope that you use the Light thing plenty! Light is the usual source of healing magic - not only is it a Gamer staple for the MC to have a healing skill, it would be a nice balancing act to do; you know, learning to heal people after breaking them?

If you don't like the healing idea though (like saying it's too cliche), just consider this. Healing is a terrifying thing in the hands of a capable fighter. One - that means he could heal himself, so imagine the looks on the faces of those who did their best to cut the MC's arm off, only for it to heal back. Two - it means he could heal others, which is not only a good support skill but also more reason as to not hold back. If he doesn't die, I could just heal him back. So it's alright for me to bust his ribs and break his legs!

Character - ??

This, I can't finalize yet. Your MC is still not really 'in there' after all. But I can comment on what is currently available.

Honestly, I liked the guy at first. Inquisitive. Likes games. With a sense of humor. Realist. Sometimes kind of impersonal, but we all have those moments! But then came along the Wham Episode, and well... yeah. He became kind of 'off' for me.

I think it's the whole shock phase. You see, he just murdered people. And his rationalization is, it's just a game, so we can ignore it. The subsequent increase in Sci-Fi and Fantasy themes didn't help either - I think now, instead of having the MC playing life as the game, the game started playing him.

You actually pointed it out - he became both the literal and figurative pawn of at least one supernatural power, and he's practically entailed to a questline without having a choice in the matter. Thus, the MC simply became a game character - one whose moral compass and orientation is variable to his surroundings.

Need to be evil? Alright. Need to be Messianic Archetype? Sure, just wait on that! Need to be a Manipulative Bastard? Great, I wanted to do that!

Just... settle him for a minute, could you? Like really, really, make him sit down and just think about the direction his life had gone for now. He knows the quest, he knows magic, but it seems that he doesn't know himself.

Where did the initial MC go?

Overall: 3.75

It's a nice story, but there are plenty of things to do just yet. But as you have just started (I mean, 20+ chapters already and it's still on the first quest) there is plenty of time remaining. I just hope you work on them. :)

Well, goodbye, and I hope you update soon!

I am enjoying this so far, the concept is obviously good. I for one would gladly have this ability.

Thestory is still in it's early stages and, just like the author stated, doesn't have a clear goal as of yet. 

The mc is just a normal guy who's simply trying to survive. Even though he is killing them instead of actually trying a little harder to incapacitate his enemies, I'm sure he's a good guy.

I still don't really understand why he got the ability (not gonna spoil how) and am not sure if that is going to be explained, but I am very curious of what will become of this ff. So for now 3 stars for the story since what has happened in the story were all a series of random events (IMO).

The grammar is better than most authors's ff's but not perfect that's why not the full 5 stars, but it is nowhere near bothersome so don't worry. 

I also like the first perspective aproach because I always like to know what's going on inside the mc's mind. 

All in all definitely worth your time.

But please improve your uploading speed!

The Gamer is the Manga that introduced me to the legendary moonlight sculptor.... 

It was the beginning..... 

BTW if you desecrate it...... I'll haunt you forever. 

Great start though. 

Bad. Really, cause in every change of world, his attitude change and that is really,  REALLY disturbing to me.

(A little bit spoiler alert below)

I mean one moment his a demon(1st world) and now his a guilty, scared, paranoid guy(2nd world). Can ya stuck in to one attitude or characteristic or whatever? But all in all, the stroy is good.

 haha interesting, initially i thought this was just a rip off, i did not see that plot twist coming :P

Good work. I hope it will be uploaded steadily.

So where do I start, first of all if you don't like slow starts then please skip this FF. While it's a slower paced story, it's still wild at times. What i consider the first arc (Power building) slow, its jam packed full of interesting information. The pacing for the story is a little erratic but still enjoyable. And the story is overall excellent. 

*Minor/Spoiler*

There are a few things I don't like in this story, mainly with the power progression. The Author spends alot of time inventing and explaining the Powers early on, but easy changes them to fit the story progression. While I understand why he does this, to keep the story unpredictable, it's still a little hard to keep track of. The main character also changes emotional states quite easily, like at first he was distraught about killing, then he was emotionally unstable for a while. After that he went from not killing for a while to mass murdering massive amounts of people. All this happened in the first 20-30 chapters, over the course of a few months. Those changes feel to fast for me, from almost having mental breakdowns, to killing 2000 people and not even thinking about it to much, but that's my opinion. Also the pace of the story is slightly jarring. But no more complaints other then some slight grammatical errors, easily fixed by a prof reader...

But there are many things I love about this story. First the story is fresh and unpredictable, even though it starts similar to the Korean Manhwa The Gamer. The story quickly diverges from the Manhwa and turns into its own story. This story is great from how funny it is and sad/serious it can get at times. I would deffinetly recommend this to anyone who likes an unpredictable ride.

P.S. My favorite chapter so far is 35, so much win in the chapter.

You have really done well to fill in the gaps left by the gamer web novel. This is very exciting, looking forward to your novel! I am going to follow this FF all the way. 

Some points of improvement: It will be good to redo your paragraphing slightly. Every sentence on a new line is quite disruptive unless you have an emphasis to make. 

It's different, the story is not predictable. Great job, even though I dislike gore I still enjoyed reading the adventure that's about to happen.

I wasn't sure how much I would end up liking this novel, because I really like The Gamer. But this pleasantly ended up exceeding my expectations! And I'm really glad the author didn't end up making 10+ chapters of Jon simply grinding his abilities; It instead jumps right into the action, and furthers the story while usually briefly stating how he ended up raising his skills.