A Hero's Common Sense



Chapter Fourteen - I'm surrounded by perverts


I’m not a person that does anything without a reason behind the action.

Instead of following my emotions, I always tried to remain rational, despite the odds. Perhaps, because of such shallow character of mine, I took my transition better than I expected. I never allowed myself to be emotional, to be ordered around by feelings since the incident long time ago…

However, since the day I met that man, my plans were never complete, despite the sudden victories. Just like how in novels, no matter how complex and well-thought the plan was, something completely unexpected would happen, only for that man to solve the problem as a last ditch effort.

For example, even if we were to raid a bandit hideout, a high-level monster would like appear, attracted to the bloodshed. Normally, a probability of such chain of events would be incredibly close to zero, but with that man it was to be expected.

Thus, when I conceived my plan, I always had that man’s bizarre talent to get in troubles in mind, expecting the unexpected. Hmm, maybe instead of learning the art of magic, I should’ve chose to pilot a giant robot, because I sound like a hot-blooded youth right now.

Ignore that

“Boss, it’s time…”

I follow my student (gopher) to the stage, feeling the shackles on my hangs clung, matching the rhythm of my footsteps. It may be a bit dramatic, but I specially made them this way. Naturally, I can easily escape them any second. However, I still play the role of a distressed maiden.

“Let’s get this over really quick. I want to eat”

I hear Alan grumble behind me and shoot him an angry glare, making him shut up instantly. Certainly, there’s a time and place for everything, but the time to satiate that bottomless pit you call a stomach is not now, idiot.

… His frightened expression is certainly superb. I am quite pleased.

“Ahem… Greeting, ladies and gentlemen! I am glad to see so many faces at this auction!”

Akira’s boyish voice reverberates through the whole hall, despite how big it is. I am sure that a person who made this building had a very good grasp of acoustics. Instantly, nearly every person turns their attention to the stage, where I, Alan and Akira stand.

“Now, we all know why we gathered here! I present you the elven maiden from a distant land. Oh, and for your information, this pretty head would sell for quite a sum”

A soft murmur passes through the crowd. I can feel the audience intently watching me from head to toe, and some of them do so with barely restrained lust. However, a skinny man in the front rows questions loudly.

“Where is da catch, ‘ere? Why wouldn’t ya just take da reward?”

It takes me a lot not to smile at his words.

“It’s quite simple. I am sure that a man of your craft would have certainly knew of recent assaults at the docks. According to my resources, some masked warrior attacked during the slave transportation, leaving the guards unconscious and stealing the goods. Last time I heard, he was searching for an elf girl”


“I am not so confident to face an opponent who could dispatch a squad of armored men by himself. Instead, I am willing to sell this girl for a humble payment. Quite simple, yes? You may think of me as a medium of sorts, or would a matchmaker be a better title”

Damn, she got too absorbed into the role. I’m sure that Akira would’ve made a very good actress, but this is my dignity you’re selling right now. I feel their dirty gazes on me! I feel them!


Slightly coughs a sharply dressed man with a trimmed goatee. He looks like a serious person, so I am sure he will ask something reasonable, like…

“I want to ask about the product’s quality. Is she still a virgin?”

He is a pervert, too! Stop staring at me like I’m a piece of meat! Don’t stoke your chin, as if you thinking about something important!
“O-Of course. She is as pure as snow”

W-What are you talking about, Akira? You are correct, but don’t look so smug, when telling someone about this. Don’t you have a sense of shame? That’s your beloved teacher you’re talking about!

“Is that so? Then, it was a good idea to come here. After all, it’s rare to see an elf outside of their territory, and nearly impossible to acquire one as a slave. She would be the prefect addition to my harem!”

Don’t try to sound cool, pervert!

“Now-now, I am not so sure…”

A husky, but certainly womanly voice retorts. I see its owner, a tanned woman with gigantic assets and a very short dress. Finally, someone with a lick of common sense here…

“… Rather than becoming an old man’s possession, she would look better by my side. I will make sure to treat you well, little birdie”

She winked at me, licking her lips.

“Oh, and that hunk over there would also do quite well”

I am surrounded by perverts.

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