Aspects; The primary source of defense for the sapient beings integrated by the system. Summonable from a drifter’s mana, aspects took many forms, forms learned through slaying the monsters made by the system in the universe—creating a copy of said monster fighting on their behalf.
To gain strength, drifters needed to slay monsters and level their aspects, grasping their way to reach a stage where evolution happened. From there, each created their own versions of those monsters, conjoined by multiple species and forms as they rose through the ranks.
Their growing power gave them a shot to thrive—to grapple fate into their hands. Those deemed extraordinary rose, charmed the hearts of those stuck with them, formed groups, then kingdoms, then empires, then they searched the answer through the stars and the infinite expanse of space.
Such was the world Theron Gray woke up into.
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This was originally a much more critical review, but the author has addressed a lot of the issues that were listed. It's still not perfect, but I think it's in a much better state than it was and writing is difficult, so i've updated my review.
I will keep the point that the author seems to struggle a bit with adequately describing to the reader what is going through the MC's head and thus the logic of what's happening in the story, but i think he's much more mindful of that now.
The story has a decent core idea, I only take a star off for the final quality of writing. A few things bothered me while reading, but if you can set them aside the story is a pretty decent go at the monster-trainer genre.
My first issue is the prevalence of the backstory to our MC and his story. Or more precisely, the lack there of. Our MC survives 3 years in a post-apocalyptic wasteland, scavenging scraps before our story really begins. Despite that, he has 0 survival skills whatsoever. Never does it occur to him to eat the raw meat of the numerous animals he bests, nor does he give much thought at all to the fact he is slowly starving to death. In fact, none of it really comes up or is even thought about until the MC is on the brink of death. How someone lasts 3 years in a hellscape with that mentality is beyond me.
My other main irk is the MC's flatness. It's particularly clear when he inevitably runs into a character he could have dialogue with. Weirdly, it feels like the few instances he has of human contact he doesn't shy away from, but also makes only a minimal attempt of gaining any useful information. Between him having virtually no reaction to the new world he finds himself in, the weird intuition he has about certain encounters, and the lack of any defining character traits, the MC feels like a hollow plot puppet we follow around. Thankfully he's mostly alone talking to his monsters, so it is fairly easy to look past.
As it stands now, this story is a decent, if mildly bland story. However, it feels like this story could become amazing once it goes through a modest rewrite. It's got the progression pacing, and the cool monster ideas. Now it just needs the MC and cast of characters.
Thanks Balex for writing this, and I look forward to how it progresses from here. :)
The idea is simple enough. Pet based system and extended world.
use of commonly known animals with slightly different traits to establish an understanding of how the system works. However, there is no world where a wolf would be able to kill a tiger 1v1. The physical abilities of the wolf would have to be significantly enhanced beyond what is reasonable for what is being described. On top of that the because of a wolf's anatomy and how they hunt there is still little chance a wolf would beat a tiger.
bears are also incomparable but let's continue with the tiger example.
they are the apex predator in the most dense survival competitive environment in the world. 1v1 very little is going to beat a tiger.
the main character to walking around with a wolf.
once the different animals and creatures have magic and stuff their physical capabilities won't matter as much. But the tutorial is using only mildly enhanced animals.
a wolf's joints aren't made for a lot of maneuver. They hunt by ripening at limbs tiring out what their killing. A tiger hunts with adept manuvarablity of both its front and back claws and are genetically programmed to rip out throats as fast as possible.
Bears are deceptively fast for pound for pound power they hold. They would rag doll a singular wolf then eat it alive, literally.
The animals idea isn't bad and could work but they three opening animals are two far in terms of capabilities.
what would have been better would be for the opening three choices to be different system variants of wolf and to have a system enhanced scavenger animal as the first mobs to level on.
Only once the MC is majorly enhanced and both he and the environment are far in the magic, logic irrelvant part of the story should heavy hitters like bears and tigers get brought up.
it wouldn't even have to be very long before the system muddies the waters of who could kill who. It just isn't passed for it to make any sense by its own logic.
this is only really a critique for the early chapters. Past the first evolution it really doesn't matter and it can go nuts.
I really like the 'loner-vibes' in this one. It has resonance with a pseudo neet like me. The dialogue has not been an issue so far, the world building is excellent I just wish there were pictures but, there aren't any so...yah. I think its pretty good overall, I just wished that maybe, even though it may be nigh impossible, to have different descriptions for the animals even though they might be the same species, specifically for the aspects.
Realy good story. Something new, the grammer is good the style also good. The only problem is that there are only 12 chaptets.
Like I said there are no problems with the style. It is very fast-paced story.
Personaly I would choose the tiger. Becouse wolfes are very generic and often chosen.
Interesting premise and a decent writing style but everything else about this story seems lacking. The MC and characters are pretty 1D. MC is also a loner edgelord, this type of protagonist went out of style back in early 2000s. The plot for the past 20+ chapters has been the same, grind experience, raid dungeon, level up, etc. If you came here for something more, you will be sorely disappointed. Author needs flesh out the main story line rather than spend time on grinding. Will see if the story improves over the next few chapters.
This is just up to champter 15 thus not really fare into the story.
Up to now I quite like the story. It's basically a litRPG system survival story focused on Monster summoning.
The system really forces itself into the story with sudden events and quests and thus is quite a bit on the moderated side of system litRPG and not super free. This is also represented by random skill assignment to the MC by the system. The one out of 3 generic summon choice at the start feels a bit simple but there appear to be many different ways to further evolve the monsters in the future.
The "kill that monster x times and unlock it" is a very basic mechanic and hopefully gets spiced up a bit later on.
The MC generally behaves intelligent if a bit reckless and forgets simple things. For example food and early self made weapons (spear /shield) aren't really stuff the MC thinks about.
Generally a nice story even tho the system randomness and intrusion is a bit iffy. Feels a bit like a coin flip if the story will develop great or not but as mentioned reasonable good start.
Wow, this is something I've been trying to write and get right for years now, but I've never been able to. Give this a read and I guarantee you it won't disappoint.
So far the character development has been stellar and the pacing quite good. Though I hope the MC gets a lion aspect soon, then an eagle or dragon to complete the trifecta of Lion, Dragon and Wolf.
Really good story so far! Only has twelve chapters so far but the story has started off very stong and hopefully keeps it up. I wish there was a more clear chapter schedule though so that I knew when new chapters will be released. I think that this book will probably end up doing very well when it ends up being published
Starts solid and keeps it there like any good beginning. MC uses their head and recognizes the potential issues and benefits a summoner brings to a survival. And, a big And here, uses those plans to move forward, to struggle on.
The story paints him as a pragmatic, resourceful, and careful survivor. Thrown into a apocalypse long before we meet him, we find a man at an end no one wanted. All the blame for it has long fallen to the wayside as people still try to live.
Enter the prize, a system has found what's left of the world and given survival a chance. But can mankind make themselves more? Or are we going to make the same mistakes?
The tutorial has begun, and the people are just finding their feet in a place that could spell defeat screaming in the dark or a victory with summons more than one man could hope to achieve. What will it be? Will the man grow stronger and evolve into more? I can't wait to see.
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