Hey guys, Kuro here! Since this fiction was moved to another lage and i'm posting there, I have this sitting around. So, instead of deleting, I thought that I could use this to make some simple table tutorials for beginners writers that want to make somethin' pretty!
So, I will share my limited knowledge in making some tables for you guys who want to do one and doesn't have idea in how to make them!
Also, I think that the tutorial that I saw for the first time was too complicated, and hard for those who doesn't understand english very well.
So let's learn!
[Warning]: Random tags, there isn't story, just tutorials.
- Overall Score
- Style Score
- Story Score
- Grammar Score
- Character Score
- Total Views :
- Average Views :
- Followers :
- Favorites :
- Ratings :
- Pages :
Leave a review
You pretty much shamelessly ripped off a story called Spartan that popped up here some time last year. Literally the only difference is the names of characters, the fact that your MC is supposedly part dragon instead of a super soldier, and your grammar and spelling makes your story painful to read. I know you said English isn't your first language, but that's no excuse to not at the very least spell check.
I must say Kuromori, you are one of the most talented people I have ever meet in my life. Anyone who has read your story can easily tell that. Ive never quite met someone that can make someone gouge out their eyes as well as you can. Im not saying you’re not talented, in fact, I just stated you were like 2 sentences ago, but its just not in the department of entertaining people with writing. Unless your doing horror. You could make kittens and puppies the stuff of nightmares.
First off is the style of the story. Its rather bland. Its rushed, and everything feels summarized. Also one thing that erks me is how you do your dialogue. Its actually a rather common mistake on RRL. So basically, currently you are doing it as:
(Bob):I like fried dog steaks.
Technically its supposed to be:
“I like grilled cat legs.”Bob said.
Next off is story. Its actually a pretty decent idea, but it isn’t executed very well, and is suspiciously similar to a story called Spartan.. Therefore ill give it an average score of 2.5 stars.
As to grammar, its horrific. Dear god what have you done. I know you say you got a proofreader in chapter 1, but has it ever occured to you that your proofreader might have terrible grammar as well?
And last off is character. The characters are all fairly shallow, and their reactions and backstory are all so unrealistic its ungodly. They solely exist just to:
1.Move the plot forward. Not that theirs much of a plot.
2.Become his harem.
And thats just everything I got for now.
The first word of the first chapter is first which is spelled wrong. That pretty much sum up what i think about the story
Please for the love of god, edit and spell check please.
Your style is probably the only part that is decent in your story and that in itself is sketchy.
Story, the actual story is o.k not bad, but the way you have given only the big points and skip the little details which make a story enjoyable. Such as in your prologue you threw in the big points he's a genetically mutated freak, enhanced against his own will, killed all the scientist, and left. How did he escape? why were the scientist doing this? Where did they find the dragon corpse? Why did he feel that there shouldn't be other modified freaks like him and why did he think destroying one facility would solve the problem? all of that you skipped and moved right into pushing forward.
Grammar: While you do use (most the time) proper present tense verbs and such your spelling is atrocious spell check would solve like 90% of the shit you misspell as well which is the sad part is shows lack of caring on your part (I went easy and said you get 1 star cause not first language...)
Character: Most your characters make me cringe, everything is just so FORCED like when he saved the trio from truck-san (who was probably there to make them reincarnate into another world LOL.. no? *cough* ok) the male had the proper reaction WTF the female: Panties drop... ok really? REALLY? can you not force romantic feelings for the guy instantly? The best romance is one that GRADUALLY comes. Instantaneous love isn't love and is more of infatuation and it's just plain cringe worthy.
Overall I think 2.5 is a fair grade for your novel, I hope this doesnt demotivate you cause I honestly hope you improve as an author cause I wouldnt be on this sight if I didn't like to read and without authors what can I read? I just want you to improve and hope you do.
CONTENT POLICE HERE. IT SEEMS WE HAVE A THIEF! STORY IDEAS LIKE "SPARTAN" AND "RISE OF A LICH" AND PROBABLY MORE SOON!
Naw I'm just playing. The fiction ideas you got were great in all but you should polish up on your work.
The story is not original so I can't say much about it. The characters feel too... Bipolar? I think that's the word. Anyway, grammar is terrible but we can't blame you since you warned us about it. Grammar Nazis would gas themselves just reading 2 of the chapters. I feel like even though this has potential, the producer is giving minimal work effort into this. Though this is kinda hypocritical on my part since I'm a lazy bastard myself.
First off, the ideas that amalgamated this story seems nice and has potential. But, it is too fast and rough for one chapter. Moreover, The chapter is short.
However, you don't go into details, which is not a bad thing. But, you'll most likely have to cover flaws later. :)
I really liked the idea for the story. Also well you be adding mature(s--) scenes in the later chs?
so gooooood please continue and don't be a slow releaser