Tenebroum (Dungeon Core)

I love this book. I've been looking for good duneon core stories, but most of them end up as either a town buildig simulator, or they just stop being a dungeon core story. I don't see this story going either of those ways any time soon. I am giving this story 5 stars for being original, and being good at it

I greatly enjoyed the work so far, and I must add that if you had some sort of Pa-tr-eon I would gladly donate like 10$ or so a month to help keep the creative juices and motivation flowing. I also guess I have to make a besechment towards you that we keep the lizards around for longer, because I really like the idea that the little murder swamp will eventually turn into a full blown deity.

I love the concept this novel is fresh and i like how he isnt a dungeon but basically became a deity like entity not only that i like the world building and the grammar is great there are no mistakes to be honest if this had more chapters this definitely would be trending

Normally I'm not big into dungeon stories, but this one has caught me.

The writing is detailed enough to picture the desolate swamp, without going overboard into annoying purple prose. It's a fine balance, and shows DWinchester's skill as a writer.

The growing creepiness as the wraith grows in power and infects the humans who search for the treasure it's hiding is exquisite. Also the obsessiveness of the wraith drew me in. And what the wraith does to gain more power actually made me cringe a bit.

There were some minor editing mistakes and typo's, but nothing that jumped out and became annoying.

It's a bit too early to go into great detail about the story. But it's off to a great start and it's picking up speed.

Definitely going to read each chapter as it's updated.

Edit:
The story is now up to 22 chapters and going strong.
The editing is getting better, the plot is progressing well, and more devious plots and actors are being introduced.

Definitely worth reading.

I am not as well versed as others on the dungeon core genre on this site, but, from what I have seen, this should certainly be considered one of its best.  It is dripping with atmosphere as a true evil is born from a single act of treachery that leads to the descent of darkness across the land.

For those reading this review in October, would recommend in particular.  It is a perfect read for a dark and stormy night or good old Hallow's Eve.

Style:

Style is fantastic, the author knows the tone to set to give this tale a dark and creeping horror vibe throughout.  If you are looking for something fun to read on a dark night, this is a good choice for those looking for something different than normal horror.

As a writer myself, the only thing I would say is the story needs a bit more sentence variety.  There are a lot of longer sentences that could be broken up into smaller, bitier chunks.  I also saw a lot of similar structure in the sentences, with several spots in the story where several sentences in a row start with the same word.  Is this necessarily a problem?  No, but considering how close to perfection the style is, I felt it was enough to dock half a star.

Story:

Narratively speaking, it is a descent into madness from a singular treachery.  One could say, in the grand scheme, it is a fun morality tale on why you shouldn't betray an associate in a random bog. 

This is, bar none, the strongest element of this work.  The story begins small, but each chapter raises the stakes and threat of the wraith.  Every step of the way, it is clear that nothing will truly stop its progress or further descent into villainy, and that we are witness to a kind of tragedy for that all that succumb to it. All the chapters had me hooked from start to finish to see where things would go next or how else the wraith would grow in power and overcome its foes.  Up to the point written, it has not disappointed on any level.

Grammar:

Similar to style, the writer is quite skilled.  The word choice and descriptions used add to the horror tones and clearly a lot of thought went into them.

However, as I am somewhat a grammar nazi, I must admit a couple issues caught my notice and were minor detractions.  Again, not enough to take a full star, but there is some missing punctuation in the first chapter that made certain points in the narrative drag on.  I tried to catch them all and leave them in a comment, but my computer decided to reboot when I went to bed last night and I lost them all. 

This is only a problem in the first chapter, though, as I did not notice any further issues in later chapters.

Character:

This rating solely relies on the power of the MC.  It is a remarkably well written eldritch monster in the making.  You see through the narrative it's shift and descent as it goes from a singular focus of protection to one of expansion and domnination.  It is worth the journey to see how the MC progresses.

One thing stopping it from a full 5 stars, however, is we are currently bereft a good antagonist for this great force.  It is possible this is not something within the scope of the story, but I do believe that this change would be enough to elevate the character score to a full five stars.

A dungeon core story that is not really about a dungeon. There is no system or stats, only a collection of dark spirits merged into a single undead entity slowly spreading their evil infulence over the world from its swamp. Every powerful foe it defeats gets added to the collective broadening its knowledge and power, other lesser foes get revived as undead to serve it for eternity. 

Tenebroum is hands down my favorite horror story on RoyalRoad. I find this particular work to be a breath of fresh air in the dungeon core genre. The story cultivates a delightfully dark atmosphere with themes of corruption and malice that really captivated me. 

Style:

The style is probably my favorite aspect of the writing. It really manages to convey such vivid imagery without bogging the story down.

Story:

I've found the narrative to be interesting and engaging. I particularly enjoy how gracefully the author handles larger time scales, without resorting to jarring time skips. Additonally, there's a definite sense of progression as the story moves along.

Grammar:

The text flows well, and I didn't notice any grammatical or spelling issues.

Character:

Another strength of this story, I apprectiate that the author committed to the protagonist's personality. I find too often that stories start out trying for a "villainous" MC, but fail to really commit. So I really appreciate how unapologetically evil Tenebroum is.

Some of the side characters could use a bit more development tbh, but I think that's just something that will occur naturally as the plot moves along.

Tenebroum has been a pleasure to read in my experience, and I would definitely reccomend it!

'Tenebroum' is a grim and grisly tale of corruption, greed, madness, obsession, and darkness. Darkness, above all else. The author has a superb command of the atmosphere, and knows how to build tension not just through the presence of horrific acts, but through the abnormal absence of blood and gore. Though blood is present in spades, the story need not rely upon shock value or sheer gore to cause appropriate dread. If you're looking for a dark fantasy with plenty of horror, consider it. 

Loving this story so far. Very unique perspective for a necromancer novel unlike all the other ones on this site that just use systems for it rather than how liches form in the first place. No major grammar mistakes along with the sentences flowing extremely well as I read through it. 

This author really knows how to write grimdark!

Personally, I can't really appreciate the story and it's atmosphere the author is slowly building because I was just again reminded of the fact that I don't enjoy Horror... 😅

But the pure writing skill is so good for royal road that I still think this story to be deserving of 5 stars...

Hopefully other people will stumble upon this story and will be able to appreciate it.