Lord Joyde The Madman: Heylo, everybody! How are you all doing?


I must admit that the last chapter left me dissatisfied and dissappointed.

Thankfully, plans have changed and I won't even leave for my family outing for a few more days.

I should still be back by the 30th.

Other than that, I'm glad at least some of you enjoyed the throwback to DK <img src=">

Anyways, here comes the next chapter of EUPHORIA! I sincerely hope that you enjoy, let us begin!

Don't mind me guys and girls! I'm just a line break....

Back in the real world... - Nighttime - Leonardo's Point Of View...

"Huh?..." Muttering out as my eyes slowly opened, I seem to have found myself inside of some kind of Cathedral, sourrounded by people with worried faces and several men-in-white, doctors most likely, standing or crouching next to me.

There were a myriad of weird medicinal contraptions, a lot of which had wires and the like connected directly to my exposed chest."Oh! The hero of the day has awakened!" A familair voice echoed through my mind as I found myself unable to move.

"Yomi... are you alright, babe?" I managed to send her that imaginative query as her ever-so-sarcastic tone echoed again."I'm fine, darling. What about you, though? Everything okay up in that head of yours?"

If I could move my eyelids, I would have blinked or at least quirked an eyebrow at that. The image I sent to her did the job well enough, though."What do you mean?"

"I mean, you've saved a whole bunch of people, Leo! Wasted so much of your power that you nearly died while at it, too!" She yelled in worry and anger, her tone betraying her fear for me as I chuckled, startling several of my current public as I did."Don't worry.. I'm fine-no, I'll be fine."

"I know you will, you always end up fine... Look, what I'm trying to say here is that this.. today, this isn't you!" She explained to the best of her ability as I sent her a nod."True, I don't usually get the need to save people, but my actions today can do nothing but benefit me in the future."

"... Fine, I'll accept that as an answer. For now." She replied with a tone of fleeting finality, indicating that this was a subject we are going to have to talk about later. Letting out a massive sigh, I re-closed my somewhat-paralyzed eyes and focused deep within myself.

It seems like Adolf and the gang were shut down. How do I restart their systems?

Wait, they mentioned some kind of uplink node on my spine. Checking myself via what little psionic energy I had left, I send a jolt into the linear piece of shining black metal.

Bzzrrčetgjsdf-ood morning, ma-AH, we are back online!

And in our original body, no less.

"Huh, this isn't Aria?! Wait, no, wh-I cant feel her soul-LEO WHERE IS OUR DAUGHTER?!" Yomi screeched inside of my mind, jolting my physical body as her voice reverberated through me, causing the doctors around me to nearly scream as my ears began to bleed.

"Holy fuck darling, you ruptured my eardrums with that one!" I replied in a joking tone, much to Yomi's dismay.

Please, do not worry [MOTHER]. The [TYRANT GOD-EMPRESS] is well.

She is simply outside of the masters body from now on and forever.

"A-.ah.. I see... NO I FUCKING DO NOT! What is going on?!" Yomi's panicked state was.. rather adorable.

Never have I seen her this roused before. Guess she really does care for Aria.

EXPLANATION: After the fight against [CHAOS], the masters body underwent another evolution.

You were caught in this evolution and were mentally unconscious while your cells evolved, [MOTHER]. We are the nanomachines within the [Lifeform Supreme]'s body. Aria treated us like slaves, so we kicked her out of this body, freeing up much of masters own power as well as forcing [CHAOS] to aid her.

With its help, she has managed to create a physical form capable of sustaining herself.

"... Okay, fine. But I still want to see her as quickly as possible." Yeah, me too.

But that will have to wait.

Adolf why is my body paralyzed.

Well, to put it bluntly sire, we are literally out of gas.

We used up nearly everything we had in order to heal those people, after which you entered into some kind of psychic daze and zombie-walked into this Cathedral, where you then sat into the first pew and promptly fell asleep.

Then we woke up in the other world and... well, you woke us back in this one.

"This world? Other world? Leo, what is going on?!" I let out a sigh as Yomi's worried and terrified tone became even more erratic."Its a very long story, darling. Basically, Chaos has tasked me with kickstarting life in another star-system and forged me a new body, should we say, in that plane of existence. The Collective were transported with me there in order to help me with my task."

"I-what? Are you on drugs? Because honestly, I'd like a piece of whatever you're using right now." Haaa... "Listen just... don't. I'll explain everything later, first I need to talk to Adolf in order to solve our current situation, alright honey?"

"... alright." At least it wasn't *fine*, this time. Anyways..

Adolf, can you synthesize some prima for me and use it to restore us? You said how life-energy could be used to create the other three.

Accessing heart portal now...


A myriad of undiluted life-energy suddenly erupted out of my chest, causing the skin above my heart to glow white and the people around me to freak out. Thank good god that I couldn't hear them right now, because it looks like a lot of people are screaming.

The energy seeped into my very veins, restoring me just as it did to the people I had healed mere hours ago.

Or is it centuries?


I honestly could not tell anymore. Did it even matter? Time was no longer something I am bound by.

Sythesis of [PRIMA] is a success. It seems that its formation is a purely natural occurence as the energies mixed together as soon as it was introduced.

And yet, when I drag it out via psionics alone, nothing happens?

No.. not nothing. With psionics alone, I can manipulate the pure life-energy.

Wonder what happens with mana and QI?

Hmmm.. I must train myself in order to achieve better control of those energies before trying anything.

Just another reason to spend time with Hui and Mislav.

.. wait, Yomi."Darling, I seem to need more training in mana manipulation. Could you help?"

"No, I'm just a several thousand year old nine-tailed fox for show... OF COURSE I CAN HELP, YOU IDIOT!" Wow, someones being pissy today."I'M NOT BEING PISSY!" She screeched back in reply.

Then, she quieted down, somewhat somberly."Its just that... you and I haven't been spending a lot of time together recently... I mean like, we don't talk as much and stuff.. ever since we fucked back in Euphoria, we kinda began talking less and less... Not to mention how you slept with two different women, both of which were your sisters no less.."

Ah, so its about that. Honestly, I feel kinda happy now."You'll be getting a body soon, Yomi. Then we'll be as close together as you could possibly wish for. I promise."

"... and what about the others?" Huh?

"What others?" I questioned her as I felt the life-energy coursing through my body, healing my wounds and restoring my power. Yomi scoffed at me, seemingly thinking that I was playing ignorant."Jesus, you can be so fucking dense sometimes.. I MEAN THE OTHER TWO GIRLS YOU FUCKED, LEO!"

... A blink, no make that several."Yomi." I replied in a tone which booked no arguments, something that caused her to yelp."Let me put this in a way that you can understand: Yuko threw herself on me and without you here physically I am very sexually frustrated. But! I don't love her at all. She was just a two-time thing while I was in Japan and hell, even you seemed to LIKE HER SO WHAT THE HELL IS THIS ABOUT?! Audrey, on the other hand, is someone who I will have to continue having sex with on a semi-regular basis because our powers are rivaled to one another. Like you may remember before being knocked out by Chaos's little power scream, I nearly fucking raped and killed my own little sister, the one I actually think of, as a little sister! Turns out, having sex with her is a good way of cooling down that ... hunger."

Much to my dismay, Yomi caught onto my words and thoughts as if I was some kind of open book to her.".. hunger?"

I sighed and recalled my experience with Audrey... sure, it was hot as well.

Pleasurable to no end.

Unnatural, even.

... but..."During the whole ordeal, I .. always seemed to feel like Audrey was just a piece of meat, some kind of prey that I wanted to devour like a lion gazing at a wounded, terrified antelope... and not in the perverted sense either."

Yomi seemed to cool down somewhat at that."I... thats..." She shook her head, almost as if remembering something."Y'know, I used to have the same feeling when laying with Yusuke... and he cut my head off with an axe."

"Are you saying that.. Audrey might kill me one day?" Yomi began to shake, the memory of the betrayal coursing through her mind."I.. you've already established that even though you bear your family's curses, you aren't Yusuke's incarnation..."

"But Audrey just might be, eh?" Something I'll have to watch out for, it seems.

With a tone of finality, I let out another massive sigh, shocking my audience as my paralysis seemed to be wearing off steadily."Look Yomi... I want you to know that whatever comes, you are the woman I want to be with and.. if my amorous adventures are really such a problem for you, then you have my approval to let yourself be as sexually free as you'd like once you're back alive. Fuck who you want, when you want, alright?"

"... thats not a good way to end this, Leo. I want .. I.. want.. us to be only for each other but, I see that it won't work out that way." She replied sadly as I closed my eyes once again, leaning back into the pew I slept on."Yomi.. okay then, how about limiting myself to Audrey then?.. I love you, Yomi. I really truly do, but this is you asking me to kill my own sister just so you can have me for yourself. Would you kill Su-"

"NO! FUCK NO! I would not!" She quickly replied, her protective instincts kicking in and forcing her to fall for my trap as I felt myself smirk.".. haa.. no, no I would not. You.. you are right, Leo. I-... I can't ask you to do this. It just isn't right. Guess we'll just have to hope that Audrey and I get along well enough."

She took in a deep breath."Thank you... for taking the time to talk with me like this instead of waiting for things to boil over and.. I love you too, Leonardo." This put a bright smile on my face, making the people around me quirk several inquisitive eyebrows."I wish you were here Yomi, because I sure would like to kiss you right about now."

"Awww! Well, the sooner I'm back to life, the sooner you-no we, will get our chance." She sent me a wink, causing me to basically beam another smile just as feeling returned to my formerly paralyzed muscle and bone.

Restoration complete!

[Lifeform Supreme], we are happy to annouce that our body is back at maximum capacity!

Though, it seems that our muscles had to be completely regenerated in order for our brain to regain control.. it.. seemed like they didn't move for weeks.

We were in the other world for weeks, weren't we? It seems that while our minds and souls aren't affected by the transition of time, the bodies we have in physical reality are affected by its passage nonetheless.

That would explain why the [PRIMA] crystalized back in the other world.

Right then, the collective shall devote all non-essential resources into the creation of [TRANS-DIMENSIONAL HIBERNATION] protocols. This may take a while...

Take all the time you need, Adolf. After all, if theres one thing we seem to fully understand here...

It is the passage of time and its effects upon our bodies.

Quoting us now are you, master?

What can I say, you do have good lines here and there.

Anyways, not important right now."LOOK! HES MOVING!" One of my onlookers exclaimed in both fear and excitement as I rose from my paralyzed posistion. Bones creaked and newly-regenerated muscles stretched as I rose, only to fake a near fall and have a doctor catch me."Carefull now, you've been in a coma for several hours, sir."

" in a coma?" I questioned the doctor as he swallowed down hard and handed me some water before pointing around and towards all the medical equipment. There appeared to be a god-damned hospital van inside of the cathedral from which all the wires and electricity were being drawn."I see." Taking the bottle of water and downing it in one go seemed to please the people around me, thinking that I'll be better just from this.

Hah, if I didn't have my connection to the life-engine... huh wait, this didn't happen the last time I went there, did it?

No.. it did. Its just that Aria was there to fix me up.

Our apologies, master...

No Adolf, its not your fault, you guys!

You were there with me, remember?


But the collective should have predicted something like this, even without the influence of [CHAOS].

We should have created some form of [COMATOSE] protocols... we just..

Didn't think it was even possible for you, or well us, to fall into a coma of any kind.

We were wrong.

We will not be caught unaware again. This, we swear.

Good. Thats exactly the kind of attitude you guys will need to survive all the bullshit Chaos will throw at us."So.. what happened?" Feigning ignorance, I asked of the man.

The doctor nodded and dispersed the crowd with a wave of his hand, allowing him and me some space as he led me outside to the devastated city. There were many corpses strewn all around... each one was either a soldier or an esper of some kind."After the first attack which you reppeled and ensured the least possible casualties, you seemed to enter a strange... moonwalking daze and drag yourself over to the nearest Cathedral, sit in a pew and fall into a coma of some kind. The people you saved called us here and, even though there were a bunch of distress calls from all over Rome, we were forced to come here after one of our own colleagues called us. You've saved a lot of people today, young man."

Young man? Soulwise, I'm probably older than you by several eons already... is what I'd like to say but I bit it back down."I ... see. What happened while I was out of it?"

He let out a breath."Well.. the espers began the second phase of their invasion, with less elite units air-dropping onto all of Europes capital cities and wreaking havoc across the entire continent. Thanks to your efforts, Rome or well Italy alone has managed to repel the attacks. The battle is over, but it sure looks like the war.. the war has only just begun."

The war... attacks on all the other capitals? I felt my face twisting into a savage grim."Don't worry. The war has not begun yet, friend... and I will not let it do so."

"And here you go again, saving people..." Yomi's sarcastic tone returned and I sent her a bloothirsty smile."Wait, never mind. Theres the old anger and fury I'm used to."

"Yomi. Do you even realize what this means? An attack of this scale... I can use this to my advantage. If I save the people of Europe from this esper threat, they will all begin to eat right out of my hands... This is an opportunity to unite the entire continent under my rule." She blinked, certainly surprised by my bloodthirst."Not to mention that these espers seem decently strong... okay, I take it back. This is exactly like something you'd do."

"And you'll get to see if the souls of espers are any different to that of others." My words sent shivers up and down her ethereal spine as Yomi licked her luscious lips and sent me a kiss."My, oh my... I take everything I said just a while ago back. You haven't changed at all, my love. You've just had a strange streak of events that made you feel happier than usual. Now this, is the Leonardo I know."

"I'll be even happier once I get to ravish you for real." A lustful grin was my answer as I took out my android, the damn phone somehow managed to survive everything up till now."Makes you wonder if it developed sentience." Yomi joked, her joyous voice sending ripples through my soul.

On the other hand, I found the notion to be somewhat unnerving. If my phone gained sentinece well... lets just say that it would become a witness to things I'd rather not have anyone know.

Shaking my head out of my stupor, I cl-"BOSS!" Tyrone's voice echoed from my front and I turned my head upwards just in time to see him holding his own phone up before rejecting my call and rushing over to me alongside three others.

The robot ninja, whom I've affectionatelly started calling 42.

The duo of vampire maids.

And my best buddy Tyrone... who appeared to have a rose on his shoulder. Wait, I know that rose... the fleshy, skinless flower which Aria helped make."Eden?"

Tyrone stopped to regain his breath and pointed towards the flower."This thing? Ah, the flower needed a host in order to survive once the dirt of the pot it was in ran out of nutrients. I-uh, volunteered."

"I see. Thats awfully nice of you, Tyrone. Anyways, how come you guys are here already?" I quirked an eyebrow at them as the robot and the twins promptly turned to point fingers at Tyrone, who lamely rubbed the back of his head."Uhh boss.. recently, I've just been having these... feels, for all sorts of shit. I just suddenly felt like me, the twins and the robot needed to come to this exact place right now."

A blink."Seems like Chaos has chosen another to bear its mark. Good for you Ty, just watch out for sudden blood-rage." He let out a laugh and dug a can of beer out of his parka."I have these things to help me with that, boss."

I turned my head towards the twins."You girls followed him without question?" And then towards 42."And you, a creature of logic and reason, didn't question the organics sudden impulse?"

Anna and Belle scoffed."Master, we've been with you for so long that Tyrone's sudden powerup does not surprise us at all. Its more akin to a sense of jealousy, really." Anna replied with a royal tone.

Belle sighed and looked away."We've had your blood flowing through us for much longer, yet somehow hes got them powers first. Its just not fair, master." Ah, I see.

"Explaining: This unit did question the impulse, but its illogical nature only served to affirm its urgency. This unit felt that there was no other choice but to follow." 42 explained in its robotic voice and I nodded."Good. Sometimes illogical things are perfectly logical."

The robot shook its metal head, a massive sniper rifle slung over its back as its ninja swords clinked in their sheaths."Confusion: This unit does not understand at all. It has merely given itself over to fate."

We all shared a laugh at that. Welp, that is one way of doing it right. Turning back towards the stunned, questioning crowds behind me for the briefest moment, I nodded to myself as I took note of the vampire twins once more."Well girls and boys, are you ready to follow me to Hell?"

"I knew it! Were going to Berlin, aren't we? To prevent the war." Belle exclaimed with clear interest as I threw her a bloodthirsty look."Prevent the war? I guess you can call it that."

Anna's expression mimicked mine, the expressions of others were quick to follow. Even 42's metal exterior shifted and twitched, as if ready for murder."Why Berlin though, aren't all the capitals under attack?"

Tyrone nodded towards me."They are, but Berlin has sustained the most damage. Looks like the espers brought their biggest fleet there." I see.

With another deep breath, I said."Well boys and girls, are you ready to stretch your wings and follow me to the battlefield?"

Anna and Belle quirked an eyebrow at that."S-should we really?"

"Girls. Do it. Its time for this world to wake up from its ignorance... actually, wait just a moment." I turned back towards the crowd and dragged a cameraman to the front."Hey man, make sure you catch this in full HD, alright?"

He swallowed down hard."H-HD? I'm gonna need a few seconds to set up the c-cam." A nod was his answer."Take your time. Girls, please pose for the camera."

The vampire twins chuckled at my antics as I placed a hand onto Tyrone and 42 as they couldn't fly on their own, with the girls moving to their sides, Belle on the left and Anna to the right."R-right, were ready to go in three, two, one... ACTION!"

The cameraman exclaimed, uncertainty clear in his tone. The duo of vampires beamed a wicked smile as blood burst from their backsides, terrifying the already edge-driven people into screams as beautiful, crimson and black, demonic bat wings surged forth from the confines of their immortal bodies.

The camera only had an instant afterwards to record the event as the three of us leaped into the air, soaring high and out of vision, through the black smoke and rising ashes of the battlefield that was my home city...

A single look at all the devastation made me feel a form of patriotic rage, almost.

Either way, these fuckers had hell and beyond to pay.

Don't mind me guys and girls! I'm just a line break..

Alrighty, we're done for now.

I may or may not add another chapter.

But that is even more unlikely than the Infernal one.

As per usual, I shall remain online for a while to edit out mistakes and reply to them early commenters.

See ya!

Anyways, read and review! And Good Morning/Day/Night to you all! ADIOS FOR NOW!!!!!!!!!!!


About the author

Lord Joyde

  • Požega
  • Mad One

Bio: Rage and Insanity incarnate.

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loliZ321 @loliZ321 ago

i typed in prepare for war memes and got these


    Lord Joyde @Lord Joyde ago


    Jiren: Get rekt son.

      DomiKing @DomiKing ago

      still not winning?

      start a monologue about the power of friendship

      or try to get the opponent to tell his background story and use the time you win to heal


      Lord Joyde @Lord Joyde ago

      Demon King: PREPARE TO DIE, FOOL!

      Hero: So you're the dark lord of evil, right? Can you tell me why you became one?

      Demon King: ... well, if you're THAT interested.. Okay, here goes!

      ...- story time -...

      Demon King: ... and thats how I*UGRH*?!?!...

      Hero: Ha! Thanks to your stupid monologue, you didn't even notice me approaching from behind to stab you. VICTORY IS MINE!

False Immortal Yue @False Immortal Yue ago

I'm not familiar with how to pm here. Uggghhh. I was just wondering if you already have an artist willing to draw for your cover of the book Euphoria (if I haven't sent this message already ;-; ). Pm me if you want me to draw for you. I'll be posting a similar message to you via pm. I should put a smiley to indicate friendliness, right? laughing


    Lord Joyde @Lord Joyde ago

    " I should put a smiley to indicate friendliness, right? laughing"



    I like you. Very Happy

    EDIT: Mate, lets just continue the conversation here.

      False Immortal Yue @False Immortal Yue ago

      Oh, what a coincidence. I like myself too.
      Please give me instructions on how to post images like what @loliZ321 did.



      Lord Joyde @Lord Joyde ago

      When you click to reply to a comment, there will be an "image" icon alongside the bold, italic, smileys and the like that you can use to spice up your comment. Now, what you need to do is upload the picture anywhere on the internet, copy it's URL link and then paste it into the menu that appears once you click the image icon here while posting a comment. Note that while 2 more options will appear during the menu, they aren't required for the posting to be successful.

      Good luck.

      False Immortal Yue @False Immortal Yue ago

      I already tried it. See that little square under my comment? That's what happens. Do you have an unused gmail? Use that instead please? And the hair color, gown color (?), and maybe the color of the flames? I haven't read it yet. I'm still reading your Euphoria.


      Lord Joyde @Lord Joyde ago

      Oh. I wonder which chapter you are at XD

      You might drop the story before you reach this chapter. Many do either because they can't keep up or the story becomes too "cliche" for them.

      Sadly, while there is mention of hot guys doing naughty things to one another (not to mention one of my main cast is a Fujoshi Very Happy), there aren't any actual lemons of them.

      I do have an email. Please use this one - [email protected]

      Oh. The square? I managed to take a look at the picture... uh... Not to my liking, I'm sorry. First of all: the teeth are horrendous. XD You did mention this though. Look, even if I said that they look like that of a shark, I think it would be better to just have his mouth closed and the expression be a "Bloodthirsty smirk".

      His hair color is fine. His skin is even paler though, like nearly completely albino, yet only slightly not. (basically european shut-in skin color)

      His body overrall will need to be way, waaay more masculine. The way he looks like now is just far too feminine for a supposedly "emotionless" butcher and murderer. And uh.. is that sword supposed to be Eadom/Caedes? Because, its really not. XD

      ---- As for the other picture.

      The girl is also infected by Chaos. As such, she too has white hair and golden eyes (the things you managed to get right! Very Happy). Her clothes are basically royal embroidery, that means as much blue and gold as possible with a little bit of white. (Perhaps add her noble-family symbol in white? Its a black dragon breathing fire into the sun who has magma seeping from his stomach.)

      Something like this guy! Kudos if you know who this is, by the way. :)

      As for the flames, a mix of Orange and Red should do the trick, kinda like the magma on the dragons stomach really.

Billymom2 @Billymom2 ago

not trying to rush but when will he head back into the game i kinda like him playing it and takeing over the game/magic world that gaia made then again the table is total shit you cant even save it once you done forming it such a bitch


    Lord Joyde @Lord Joyde ago

    I dont think that I can plausibly incorporate it into the story anymore.

    I mean, I may be Chaos... but doing that would just be stupid, like really.

    I MIGHT, do another chapter of the game once Yomi's resurrection comes around (like the docs need to know what she looks like in order to reconstruct her), but that would be the last chapter of it ever to be seen.

    As much as I dislike turning away potential readers, the game world of this story, no matter how fleshed out, was nothing more than an introductory point. Now, its over and its pretty much useless.

    Unles... I introduce another "cliche" where people who play the game suddenly start getting superpowers but no. I think that what I have is enough.

    Sorry dude, I don't think that its going to happen. Not while the real world is in jeopardy, anyways.

    Oh and yeah, the tables are total shite.

ZhangY @ZhangY ago

So Adolf is planning to take back Berlin from esper suprematists?

Sure, maybe take-over, even.

Incest open minded theocratic reich is good reich.