Lord Joyde

72. Of Balkan News and Dark Outfits


Lord Joyde The Madman: Heylo, everybody! How're you all doing this fine day?

So it seems like you guys actually liked the chapters featuring Audrey even if you hated the other secondary characters...

Meh. I hated them more than you. Which is why we are currently pretending that they never even existed.

In any case, I find this to be rather relieving.

On a side note, this chapter is going to be so fun afterwards, especially the comment section. People from the Balkan's will know why. :)

Anyways, here comes the next chapter of EUPHORIA! I sincerely hope that you enjoy, let us begin!

Don't mind me guys and girls! I'm just a line break...

The Eight Of October, year 2022 - Leonardo's New Hideout - Leonardo's Point Of View...

A deep inhale and exhale echoed throughout the room as I found myself sitting upright on a couch and watching TV re-wired to a European channel by Tyrone."Feeling any better, boss?"

Said strongman approached me with a cup of hot cocoa which he gingerly laid onto the table in front of me."N-no man... I'm f-f-f-fuckin' sh-shivering."

"Well maybe next time you'll close your windows and turn on the heat before laying down naked into a barely closed tube while covered in sweat and blood." Belle snorted from behind me, her rude tone echoing in my ears as she chuckled at my misery.

I snorted right back at her."Result non-withstanding, you seem to have enjoyed seeing me like that if your sister is to be believed."

Belle blinked several times as her brain processed what I said and then, with rage etching itself into her frame, turned around with a roar."ANNA! WHAT DID I TELL YOU ABOUT -" Turning around back towards the TV and promptly shutting her voice out as I sneezed from my cold, I took the remote and went to a news channel.

"-staggering reports coming in from the Balkan League this morning, my European friends... While the good portion of last week was mainly covering the debate between Serbian and Croatian nationalists who fought over which city should be the new nations capital, that is either Zagreb or Belgrade, it seems that this was little more than a blatant cover-up perfectly executed by the newly entrenched government. Yesterday, at approximately the fifteenth hour of the day, the League's unified armies led an unprovoked attack on Kosovo alongside formerly Serbian nationalists and other such civilian militia. The result? The utter and complete capitulation and annexation of Kosovo. It would seem that, even if Kosovo did not end up as Serbia, it did end up as part of The Balkan League. Many European countries are stunned by this aggressive military move but our leaders have decided not to intervene as doing so would likely tarnish our newly established good relations with Russia. Furthermore, as the League was basically made to deport all Muslim population from its collective territory, Albania and Greece have been effectively paralyzed and thus, made unable to provide any form of aid to Kosovo. In addition, nationalists from both of these countries are radicalizing and calling for the joining of their respective countries to the Balkan League, causing multiple terror attacks and worker strikes to appear all on the same day." The black haired reported spoke with some difficulty and with immense black bags under her eyes.

She seems shocked and horrified by these events... Me? I think that this obviously planned event was pure genius. Whomever leads this Balkan League isn't a normal person at all."However, though the event prior to the attack was a total hoax and the capital city of the new nation is still unknown, there appears to be a far more dangerous conflict going on between two religious groups, that is the Catholic and the Orthodox Christians. Both of these groups, stationed in Croatia and Serbia as one would expect, are calling for the nations religious unity under their respective banners. The politicians of the country appear to be supporting neither side in the conflict, with one of its leaders; namely Zvonimir Belašić has declared himself a Deist and believes that the peoples religion is their own personal choice. Though others have not openly declared their intentions as Mr Belašić has, this does appear to be the general governmental opinion, which rises questions about the League's true motivations."

A deep breath was taken as the reporter switched papers and sighed out clearly tired."On another note, the League has begun *talks* with its neighbors about their integration into the league, even going so far as to openly state a time limit to Romania. This time limit is not yet publicly known but what is known is that Ukraine seems to be part of whatever the League is planning, as it has started to mobilize its military forces to the Moldavian border."

Another sigh followed by a yawn."I don't know folks... it seems like we might be having a third world war on our hands pretty soon."

Her solemn frame made me bust out laughing, to which karma replied to with an intense headache."Oww!"

She continued after a minute of silence."Continuing on to America, it seems that the situation has not exactly improved there either, as the current madam president has shown to be largely disinterested by the many Esper organization tearing into the people of America. This has caused very bloody riots to erupt everywhere from New York to Nevada and if the Internet's predictions are to be taken seriously, a coup is on the way. Furthermore, the Pentagon itself has been attacked by a force of Espers a couple days ago and while the American forces on site managed to prevent any severe damage, the lack of any kind of response has lead many to believe that the madam president may be an esper herself and that a coup had already happened without anyone noticing."

Don't mind me guys and girls! I'm just a line break...

At that same time - The Zatara Family Mansion (Audrey's Room) - Audrey's Point of View...

As soon as the light returned to my eyes and I was able to properly open them, I managed to see several people standing around me worriedly, each and every last one gasping in both surprise and relief as I sat up."AUDREY!"

My fathers voice echoed through my head in a very painful manner and forced me to slam a palm onto my forehead in frustration."Oh for gods sake be quiet!"

I exclaimed with raising fury as my older brother Michael snorted while leaning onto the open door to my room, an elderly gentleman I had not seen before standing next to him as my brother elegently points towards me with a hard."Well here we are, Mr. Istvan. Though, it seems like nothing much happened to her... Well other than that rather sexy skintight outfit appearing out of nowhere."

And with that, he went away as I took a look at myself to find that I was still in my shadowform. A quick glance at my wall mirror proved that everything was there, eye-cracks and all."Huh, guess this means I can become a shadow even in the physical world? Come to think of it, Arsene did first appear in reality and I only met him in the void afterwards."

Muttering to myself and much to the utter confusion of my father, I promptly leap off my bed."Ah! A-Audrey! You should rest! We don't even know wh-huh?" Father yells in worry as his eyes grow wide but I merely place a finger onto his lips in a rather un-daughterlike-manner."Father, everything is fine. I just got myself superpowers like Leonardo."

"So you are also a prophet of Gaia?" He asked in surprise and joy as I blinked and shook my head."No, I.. uh, how do I explain this..."

Much to my surprise, he shook his head in negative as he stood up."No-no, that's fine. You can explain it to me whenever it suits you, it does not have to be right now. Honestly, it does not look like you have the full story yourself anyways..."

I blinked, stupefied."Y'know pops, while you always diss on Leo for his apparent prophetic ability... the implausible validity of said ability nonwithstanding, you aren't exactly ... how should I say this? Argh, words are difficult, anyways you got me. I don't really have the full story but something tells me that the mister over there just might."

Father nodded and turned towards Istvan as he stood up from his kneeling posistion, a maid handing him a handkerchief to wipe away his tears."I figured as much. Hmm, with two of my kids already getting their hands on some superpowers, maybe I should start seeking my own sometime soon..."

He left the room, but not before giving and receiving a bow to and from the man named Istvan.

I stared at the old guy as we both waited for father to leave, a pale energy collapsing around his heart which did not beat. Ah, is this guy a vampire?"Indeed. A creature whose soul has been consumed by the void, yet the void never saw fit to finish the job."

The voice of Arsene whispered in my mind as realization dawned upon me, this must be ancient vampire that Leonardo befriended."Not even going to question the voice in your head, milady?"

The vampire asked of me with a chuckle as he sat down onto a chair... wait, since when do I have chairs in my room? Must have been brought by one of the maids...

Although, taking a closer look at the chair, I can see dark energy leaking out of it... an object created out of shadows?"Your assesment is correct, milady. Though I would prefer to continue this conversation via voice... mind-reading is difficult. Especially since your mind is clouded in protective dark."

Catching myself and then shaking out of my stupor, I give the older man a respectful and very ladylike bow."Sorry about that old man, but I just woke up so excuse me if I'm a bit slow."

He blinked at me and smirked."Ladylike physical behaivor, but not ladylike manner of speaking. How odd." He shook his head."In any case, I suppose I should introduce myself. I am Istvan J. Helix, though just Istvan would be fine."

"Audrey, nice to meet you. Now, why don't we get to the point? I sincerely doubt you're visiting me just out of courtesy." I replied with some annoyance leaking through my tone. Hmm, I thought I gave my rage to Arsene when I summoned him... how strange.

He took in a deep breath."Indeed, you are correct. I am here because of my servants and their failure. You know of who and what I am talking about, yes?"

I quirked an eyebrow at the old man as I sat down onto my bed."You mean the vampire sisters? I can tell you right now that what happened yesterday was not a failure in any way." I raised my hands and willed the dark power now resting inside of me forth as shadows collapsed around my arms, surging through my veins and making me feel as if I could accomplish anything I desired.

The vampire rubbed his chin in thought."Hmm... perhaps. But I have already punished them for their actions. Do not worry, they yet live or unlive anyways. Now then, where was I? Oh yes, the reason why I am here..."

He makes a dramatic pause which causes me to roll my eyes."I am here because I was fully prepared to have to kill you should your body transform into an abomination of darkness and then resurrect you as a Vampire later on... though it seems that you've somehow managed to beat down the void itself and come out on top."

Closing my eyes at the vampires explanation, I quickly threw a blanked around myself as I willed my shadow form to dissipate, revealing my currently naked, human form."Yeah, you could say that."

A nod from the guy was my reply as he stood up."I suppose that my presence is not truly neccessary anymore. However, since you have now gained some power over darkness, you may wish to gain more power. If so, then please tell your father that you wish to see me whenever you are ready."

"And what exactly are you going to do when I am ready to call you?" I tilted my head in confusion as he smirked and replied in a humorous tone."Well, what any gentleman would do if they wished to impress a lady such as yourself!"

"Take me shopping?" I questioned with a snort, to which he suprised me by nodding."Yes! And with no real limit on how much I am willing to spend."

A blink as I stared at the old guy."Say, how old are you again?"

"Why? Is the young lady perhaps interesting in me?" I laughed at him and then deadpanned."Nah, just your purse."

He cringed and rubbed the back of his head lamely."Well, at least you are honest."

Don't mind me guys and girls! I'm just a line break...

Okay for some reason this chapter was extremely confusiong to type down for me.

I dunno why but I lost my train of though several times.

.. The quality is probably gonna suffer for it. Oh well.

Also, I have no spellcheck installed as I have a new computer! YEY


And the like...

Next chapter will be solely LitRPG... well, as much as it can be at this point... I've never really planned anything much for it other than the Incerum storyline.

Guess I'll have to re-write the plotline in my head to fit it in somehow.

Anyways, read and review! And Good Morning/Day/Night to you all! ADIOS FOR NOW!


About the author

Lord Joyde

  • Požega
  • Mad One

Bio: Rage and Insanity incarnate.

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bramblestar9010 @bramblestar9010 ago

Balkan League is removing kebab well it seems

gaigous @gaigous ago

I won't miss the LitRPG aspect of it as much as I originally thought I would.

I think we should all take a moment to ponder this line: "the Internet's predictions"

All hail the lord prophet "Sir Interweb" Tongue


Audrey's intentions for Istvan's wallet and "possibly" all other wallets:



Derwipe @Derwipe ago

Well i had to choose between first here or dishonored 2 and you see what won xD