Lord Joyde The Madman: Heylo, everybody! How're you all doing this fine morning?

Me? I'm fine, somehow.

First morning in a while that I've felt that way.

Had to move back to my old city temporarily so that I can clear and pick up some documents... I swear to god, everything that could be is complicated these days...

Anyhow, I have to go drive some more and have errands to run in about an hour so lets see what I can do until then since I won't be here for most of the day... probably.

Anyways, here comes the next chapter of EUPHORIA! I sincerely hope that you enjoy, let us begin.

Don't mind me guys and girls! I'm just a line break...

The Following Morning - The Mansion - Leonardo's Point Of View...

"-ast night attack upon the Beno Mansion, which was originally blamed on terrorists, is now being investigated deeper and reports suggest that it may not have been terrorists but the violent monster our city knows as the Gourmet... my friend within the investigation group have told me that the criminal busted through a crack in the mansion's high brick wall and then proceeded to kill a guard before entering the sewer opening connected to the mansion's reactor room, which he then proceeded to blow up, shutting down each and every camera inside and frying their memory cores. How he survived the explosion as he apparently did so by shooting the reactor several times is not yet confirmed-" I yawn hard into my hand as the TV's casts annoying voice echoes into my ears.

Shaking my head out of my stupor as my eyes hazily form the space around me to a visible level, I look around to find myself still dressed in the Butcher's Garment, mask and all, while laying down a couch in the middle of the main hall. The Kitchen, I mean."Already up and about? Wow, I thought you'd be down for at least a couple more considering the hit you did yesterday... or rather, earlier today." Taking off my mask, I crack my fingers.

Another big yawn is forced out of me as I turn around towards Michael."Good Morning, Mike.. you mind telling me what day it is today?"

Quirking an eyebrow at me, he chuckles before proceeding to turn off the TV and turning his head down towards his phone."Its the first of June, year 2022 and y'know, Monday."

Standing up, I crack my neck and do a couple stretches before yawning for the third time."Ugh... I really need to get some coffee... Oh and, how long does my absence last?"

"You mean for school? You got three days left, excluding this one... but dude, I knew that Reality Lapses are dangerous but that was some freaky level shit." Ah, reality lapses.. right.

You see, a Reality Lapse is a possible side effect of playing any form of virtual reality for so long that your brain experiences utter shutdown, becoming a form of receiver rather than transmitter. Some say that reality lapses are an AI's attempt at mind controlling humans, as our brains get so used to receiving commands and input that they turn of the ability to form those themselves, at least for a while.

Possibly due to my current state, I've never really had one no matter how much I played... and I'm quite sure that those dreams don't exactly classify as one."Getting scared of Euphoria now, aren't we big brother?"

He gulps down hard."Honestly? I'm pretty terrified of anything AI related... how can you even have the courage to just let an AI send signals into your brain?.. I think, I'm gonna cancel out on my capsule."

I shrug, raising both of my hands up in the air."Welp, that's your choice. And its not that bad when you know said AI enough to call him a friend."

Blinking at me with a raised eyebrow in confusion, Michael suddenly exclaims."You... you just smiled and called someone a friend. What the fuck?"

I blink right back at him and turn around to stare at a nearby mirror and sure enough, the remainder of a smile is shown upon my features."Huh, I guess even this was a possibility."

"Dude! Maybe that reality lapse really did fuck you over in more ways than one.. you should go see the doctor to give you a checkup." Ah. Akim... well, there might be some measure of worth in paying him a visit, provided he isn't researching anything.

Hey, maybe I could get him to cook up a claymore or a crusaders long-sword for me to use. So that I can get in touch with said weapon type before I grab Eadom."Heh, yeah. I just might... anyway, I'm gonna go for a shower right now. See you later, Mike."

Another stunned blink from him as I turn away to leave, making sure to grab my mask on the way to my room."Yomi, is this what you meant by sating that so-called hunger of mine?"

"Mhm, tell me, you supposed social-cripple, how does it feel to feel?" Her amused voice echoes throughout my mind and I can't help myself but smirk.

"Pretty good, actually. Its like whatever bitterness was eating at me all this time has been... cut. Not removed, like a stubborn weed, only setback to the point where it can't affect me."
I calmly explain, my mind wandering around yesterday. Just how casually I butchered those foolish guardsmen... well, those who remained alive anyways.

Turns out that once you kill a Vampire, all of the ghouls borne of its blood turn to dust. How... sad.

Not that I actually care anyways, yesterday proved to be both entertaining and satisfying... but these new emotions do make me pose a question. Grabbing Eliot out of his sheath beneath my cape, I promptly stab myself through the palm of my right hand."Hmm? What's this about?"

"I don't feel anything. Haaa, good. I was actually scared there for a moment."
Is my reply to her question, an amused spree of laughter echoing in my mind as I watch black tendrils nearly instantaneously fixing my wound."Black tendrils? And they look kind of like yours, Yomi." I hear myself say out loud as I walk into the private bathroom of my own room, taking note of the already fixed door. Damn the servants of this mansion sure do work fast... then again, saying that their lives are constantly on the line would be an understatement.

"A-ah, those Nanites of yours seem to have... for a lack of a better word, copied the design of my physical form. Although, I do not understand how or even why."
I quirk an eyebrow at seemingly nothing as I send my biochip a little question.


Order Detected; Processing....
Organic material designated as "Yomi", possesses an advanced bio-organic structure which had the possibility of improving regenerative capacity by 500%

As such, the changes done fall within the "Allowed Processes" category which do not require the hosts acceptance to be implemented..

Don't make me repeat myself, VI. How. Did. You. Assimilate. Yomi.

Order Detected; Processing....
Success, describing process...
Step 1 Step 2 Step 3
Scanning results revealed advanced organic structure. Structural Assimilation attempted.
Further analyzing revealed the use of an unknown energy. Host body scan revealed the source of unknown energy.
The organ designated as "The Heart" has been revealed to have its own version of the Neural Network.
Host cells which bound themselves to that network maintain a constant bursting of unknown energy.
Nanite structure divided.
One thousand Nanites now possess "Heart Cell" structure, providing a sure source of the New Energy.
One thousand and five hundred Nanites now possess "Yomi" structure, providing five times the regenerative power they normally would.

I see..."Well now, isn't this interesting, eh Yomi?"

Her voice is barely a whisper as she replies."Yeah... but I've never heard of these Heart Cells... I do know how a persons mana circulation system is around their heart but I didn't think its made by physical cells... and with so much mana flowing inside of a persons body, said cells would most likely spend their entire existence utterly invisible. I guess that only something their size would be capable of noticing them."

So this is a small tidbit of the magic world that only I know? Nah, not possible. I can't be the only person equally tied to both magic and technology. Still, these Nanites are quite impressive.

I wonder... How many more Nanites could I sustain?

Order Detected; Processing....
Success!; You have the ability to sustain exactly twenty-five hundred more nanites.
Warning!; exceeding the default limit may have dire consequences.

What would happen with a thousand more?

Order Detected; Processing....
Success!; Required food intake would be doubled.

Sensory input/output would be quickened and may cause severe disorientation before adaption.

Then do it. Start fabrication of one thousand extra nanites. Keep them at default just in-case the new models have unknown weaknesses. Oh and designate the New Energy as *Mana*.

Order Detected; Processing....
Success!; Queue has been started.
1. New Energy has been designated as "Mana".
2. Fabricating Default Nanites... 0/1000 est 45 minutes.

There, good. Now then, lets finally take this damn bath... I stink."Ooooh, my my my... you're quite eager to get naked, even with a lady in your head." She whispers in my mind, echoing in my ears as if she was standing right next to me.

"With whom I can't do a single thing..." I mutter out quite with a voice full of disappointment, a dark cloud appearing above my head as I witness Yomi's imaginary smirk.

Winking at me with a rather lovely smile, she replies."Don't worry... with how you've been doing so far, it shouldn't take long before you can see me..."

"And what about touching you?" Quirking an eyebrow at apparently nobody, I let out a tired sigh as I fall down into the bath, steam filling the room as the heated waters hit against my bare skin.

She hums in thought before replying."Well, if you are really up for it... then let me possess a corpse, a random chick you like. We can fuck like that."

I shake my head in negative."Nah, that wouldn't be you and I don't want to put junior inside of a corpse... is there any way we can require your body?"

Another imaginary quirked eyebrow before she replies."Uh, in case you don't realize this, you'd still be fucking a corpse even if you found my body.... right?"

Yet another negative shake as I feel a shred of hope already raising from my mind."No, because your *corpse* would be worth spending money on to perform Cellular Revitalization."

"Ce...cellu.. cell-what now?"
I let out a massive laugh as she asked me this, cheery chuckles eventually dying down as I get serious."Cellular Revitalization... its the modern days favored path to supposed immortality. Its a process where a body is put inside of a capsule filled with agitated regenerative liquids of all kinds, eventually resulting in the reformation of lost cells and forcing the body into a somewhat living state... Rich families will often use this on relatives who died in gruesome ways in order to bury them whole or as they remembered them if they per say died in a fire. Sadly, or perhaps thankfully, it can only be used on the bodies of younger people, but as you Nine-Tails don't really age..."

"There is a chance that it could be used on me too... I... I... You've given me a lot to think about, Leo... and while I do not yet know where exactly my corpse it, I do know that it still exists somewhere for one simple reason..." She replies thoughtfully as I nod.

"You can't pass on." I point out with a smile.

"Exactly... I will extend my power to the maximum... give me some time, around a week or two and I will find it." Another nod to seemingly nobody as I give my own reply."Alright... but if its somewhere in Japan, which it most likely is, we may need to wait a little before I can go re-claim it... and even then, we'll have to wait for Akim to get his hands onto a CR-Capsule."

"That's understandable... I've spent two thousand years as a ghost, I have the capacity to wait another few years if I have too." She explains with a bright smile and I let out a breath of relief, a part of me had thought that she'd be angry, but hey, I guess my ancestor would not have married an illogical woman.

Suddenly, a blink shoves me back into reality as I realize something."Yomi. There may be a way for us right now, after all."

"H-huh? How? What do you mean?" She questions me with quite a bit of excitement, some of it being bitten back as she most likely did not want to appear too needy.

But I can't exactly blame her for being horny... I mean, shes been stuck as a ghost for the last two thousand years...

I quickly dry myself and slap a towel around my waist before doing something I haven't done in a couple weeks. Turning on my non-vr gaming setup, awe yeah. Three separate computers spark to life as the one on the left is instantaneously connected to, the one on the right is connected to Youtube and the middle one just opens up like a normal computer.

Yawning into my hand, I open up my browser and log into the forums of Euphoria. Time to call Harold. With a quick PM, I soon hear the familiar call of Skype and return it as I hear the robotized voice ask."Dude, what's up with you calling me so suddenly?"

"Harold, you are going to love this. I had a reality lapse when I disconnected a couple days ago, do you know about it?"

"Yeah man, you nearly fucked over the entire server and broke your own account. The Starvation VI was pounding against your bugged profile for ages but you just didn't receive any form of warnings, its only when I overrode the entire system that we could kick you out of the game."

"Man, I was raiding at that moment, y'know... but why didn't you just whisper me?"

"I COULDN'T. It said you ignored me but when I checked your list it said you didn't... dude, your entire profile got super buggy all of a sudden... we managed to fix it eventually but.. Ah, whatever, its in the past, what did you want now?"

"Turns out, that reality lapse made me develop an acute split-personality... and better yet, its a chick and the doctors actually managed to isolate her."

"... you're shitting me."

"Are you ready to do some science, Har Har?"

".... Your temporary ban is from now on utterly abolished. Get your sorry ass in here, I. HAVE. TO. SEE. THIS."

Needless to say, my smirk rose from ear to ear as I received the notification saying that I was no longer banned."An Acute Split-Personality? Wow... I must say, you do have quite the imagination."

"Every guy has a boost to his imagination when he need to think something up if the end result is getting laid." She blinks before nodding in reply."That's a fair point."

Now then, lets get this show on the road.

Don't mind me guys and girls! I'm just a line break...

And that is it for this chapter of the story!

I'm sorry but I'm really tired after all that driving and the tilt I got from posting the chapter prematurely...

I need to go to sleep for a couple hours... next chapter should be up tomorrow evening if all goes well.

Anyways, read and review! And Good Morning/Day/Night to you all! ADIOS FOR NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


About the author

Lord Joyde

  • Požega
  • Mad One

Bio: Rage and Insanity incarnate.

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Lord Joyde @Lord Joyde ago

02/08/2016 15:59:49alexanderyou Wrote: [ -> ]Thanks for the chapter~

Np :D

JacobJoker @JacobJoker ago

OMG, Harold's last comment made me laugh so hard.


Lord Joyde @Lord Joyde ago

02/08/2016 16:06:24JacobJoker Wrote: [ -> ]OMG, Harold's last comment made me laugh so hard.

Good xD

Natsume @Natsume ago

Yomi is going to get laid in Euphoria?

Thanks for the chapter!

Shikirei @Shikirei ago

That ending just made surviving this hellishly hot&humid day totally worth it >_<

Lift-Off @Lift-Off ago

I love Harold. I can't describe it in any other way. Just love that AI God.


Lord Joyde @Lord Joyde ago

02/08/2016 16:14:43Natsume Wrote: [ -> ]Yomi is going to get laid in Euphoria?

Thanks for the chapter!


02/08/2016 16:15:05Shikirei Wrote: [ -> ]That ending just made surviving this hellishly hot&humid day totally worth it >_<

I'm glad it did.


02/08/2016 16:16:53 Wrote: [ -> ]I love Harold. I can't describe it in any other way. Just love that AI God.

:P ./tips fedora

I'm glad you think so, my good sir!

"Insert Edgy Comment about the cosmos being unnecessary and everyone should die Die DIE"

valheru @valheru ago

Thanks for the chapter

Thanks for the chapter

dragonmage124 @dragonmage124 ago

....well now what is that AI doing getting more and more emotional and thinking on its he going to go all Rouge if he keeps up chatting up with the MC... that may be fun to watch anyway .... more plzzzz