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Lord Joyde The Madman: Heylo, everybody! How're you all doing?


Not much more to say here other than thank you all for the support you've given so far!

Our story's popularity is rising guys and girls! More people chose to let themselves be guided by chaos every single day!

MUAHAHAH, SOON, I SHALL CONTROL THE ENTIRE WO-ahem. *cough*

Anyways, here comes the next chapter of EUPHORIA! I sincerely hope that you enjoy, let us begin!


Don't mind me guys and girls! I'm just a line break...


A few minutes later... - 1 AM - Palatine Hill - Leonardo's Point Of View...


Managing to arrive at my destination within minutes due to my sheer excitement, I seem to have come far too early.

Because there was no vampire taxi waiting for me nearby.

Deciding to take this moment of peace to calm myself, I sit down into a meditative position on a seemingly random patch of grass... the same bit of ground where I split that werewolf's head in two.

Grinning widely as the memory replays itself in my mind, I start getting a feel for my energies. Locating my mana isn't that hard since its mainly concentrated around my heart and then goes outwards following a specialized nervous system. Kind of like blood flowing through veins but more... energy-y.

However, what I wanted to find was my essence, my life-force, my Qi. Remembering how Yomi said that it was scattered everywhere in my body and trying to escape to the outside, I focus upon my skin and muscles. At first, I can only sense a kind of warmth, but it seemed to be nothing special, just the natural heat my body produces and feeds into cells in order to ensure that they function properly. And then, just barely managing to catch it, a golden-orange string of energy showed itself flowing around the deltoid muscle of my right hand. Focusing onto it, I sensed that I could move the string of essence around and, as I did so, found that it moving causes me quite a bit of pain. Instinctively, I moved it to the middle of the muscle it was floating on and then found myself thinking of a seaport, a number of images showing docked ships with heavy anchors stuck to the earth beneath the cold seas...

I felt myself pushing the string of energy down, locking it, anchoring it to the muscle below it. As soon as the anchor found its way down, I experienced the most painful muscular paralysis of my entire life."Guh!" I grunted in heavy pain as I found myself clutching my arm but soon, the pain subsided and left behind it a newfound sense of said muscle. I no longer needed to focus on it to feel that its there and it felt like the muscle wound itself tighter. Focusing upon the string of gold, I noticed how it seemed to consume the heat around it and then throw it out for some reason.

Wait, there's only a little bit of Qi for every lot of heat, right? Could it be processing the energy and taking only Qi?"Congrats Leonardo. I have no fucking idea what you just did to yourself, but you seem to have managed to create an artificial Dantian."

"Oh, well that makes sense." I blankly state with a flabbergasted voice."And before you ask, I have no idea what I did. I was just following my instincts."

"... you know what, screw the immunity to mind control, your *instincts* are the real overpowered piece of bullshit here." Yomi promptly relied with a blank stare.

I scratched the back of my head lamely."Well, instincts are one of the first things Chaos improves to those who are linked to it."

She rolled her eyes."Oh really? And what exactly is this Chaos of yours?"

I smiled."That's a good question, Yomi. But I have absolutely no idea how to explain it to you... hmm, to put it in the most simple of terms, its a way of life."

"So its not some random supernatural entity you've apparently decided to worship?" She asks with a quirked eyebrow and I laughed."Chaos is no entity. In truth, it cannot be designated as anything really... well, other than life itself."

Her voice went silent at that, as if entering yet another spree of pondering."Does thou speak only with the dead, Prophet? Or art thou capable of conversing with one such as I as well?" An impossibly old and powerful voice echoed behind me.

Turning my head around so quickly that my neck cracked, I found myself staring at a bowing old man... which creeped the hell out of me."Uh.. yeah, I can speak with the undead too.. You're my driver, right?"

His amusement is clear in his tone as he replies."Oh my, your skills in deduction are incredible sire... perhaps you can also guess my age?"

I blinked and blurted out a random number."2997."

The old man was suddenly frozen solid. Oh my god, I got it right."O... kay... that was... strange, to say the least... should we go now?"

Nodding at the old man, I promptly stood up from where I was sitting and walked into the limousine to sit down again."So uh, gonna celebrate your 30th century soon?"

He laughed."Indeed! And what a celebration shall it be!"

And then my brain finally catches up to the fact that somebody who is this old is a fucking taxi driver. Apparently, my thoughts are incredibly loud since the old man turns around to look at me with a knowing smile upon his face."What can I say? When you get to be as old as I am, young man, you begin to realize that no matter what you decide to be, so long as you have enough power on your hands, everything's going to be all right."

"I don't think I'm ever gonna reach those years, but I agree with you. Power is the only universal language, one that all things can understand, weather living or dead." A nod from the driver makes me close my eyes for a moment, only to reopen them in shock as he says."Well, you are already an eternal being... just have to play your cards right and not piss off the wrong people and you should be alright."

I blinked."Wait what?!"

He blinked right back at me as he turned on the limo and started driving."Hmm? Have you not realized it yet? You are a Revenant, young man. One with an item or two bound to you, which means you will not age any more than you already have."

"... The items I bind to myself are a link to my life... so long as they exist, so too shall I..." I heard myself muttering out in uncertainty.

I gained immortality and didn't even notice it."I figured that would be enough for you to get the meaning but apparently, I was wrong. Sorry Leo, I should have been the one to tell you." Yomi says in a saddened voice."No, that's fine Yomi. I'm... surprisingly alright with this."

"Yomi, eh? Was she not a very infamous white Kyuubi some 'ne or thousand two years go?" The driver asks with quite a bit of interest and I bite my lip in frustration."Really ought to watch my mouth when I talk with the dead..."

Noting the drivers ever-so-amused glance, I say."Yes.. I don't know how old she is, but that's the one."

A nod from him."Indeed! Asking a lady her age is perhaps the oldest mishap a man can do."

I found myself snorting at that and then gaining a mischievous smirk upon my frame, I asked."Hey, would you be willing to tell me whatever else you may know about her?"

"HEY! That's rude! If you wanna know about me then ask me directly, dammit!" Yomi screamed into my ear but I promptly ignored her as the driver caught on to my intentions and decided to fully indulge my request."Hmm... yes, I seem to remember how her ancestral homeland was very near Tokyo city, some few kilometers to the west of what is today referred to as the Nasu Onsen Jinja, I believe. Though, my Japanese is not very great so I may have butchered that name in one way or another..."

"OH FOR THE LOVE OF KAMI! Please, do not go there when you fly to Japan. I have ABSOLUTELY NO DESIRE to go see my parents... although, I do wonder if my little brother is still alive..." She exclaims and then grumbles out in uncertainty.

Musing on what I just heard, I let out a loud sigh."Doesn't take so well to jokes, does she?" The Driver questioned with a smile.

I waved my hand in negative."Nah, its okay... how long until we arrive to the Mansion?"

"Approximately fifteen minutes, sir." He answers clearly and efficiently, making me nod in approval."Good.. I'm gonna meditate for a bit now so if I fall asleep before we get there, please wake me."

With a nod from him, I begin to repeat what I had done to my right deltoid muscle, seeking strings of gold and then anchoring them to each and every muscle. Every muscle I complete causes me incredible pain, more so than the last, but I fight through it, the image of an indestructible body forming in my mind, as I fight through the pain with a grin and a smile upon my face.


Don't mind me guys and girls! I'm just a line break...


Approximately fifteen minutes later... - The Shivering Cross Mansion (Ruin) - Leonardo's Point Of View...


Some fifteen minutes and ten new dantians later, I felt a hand shaking me out of my meditative state."Are you alright, sir? Your life-force seems to be fluctuating quite dangerously."

Opening my eyes to find the old man creepily staring at me once again, I give him a uncharacteristically shaky nod."Y-yeah, I'm... fine.."

"Leonardo, whatever you've been doing is making more damage than simply fluctuating your Qi. Its making a huge strain on your heart.. the only reason you're even alive is because a Dantian formed naturally on your heart because the energy pull from all the others caused much of your Qi to flow into your center." Yomi says with worry clear in her tone.

Dad, I don't know what you've done but your entire body is reconstructing itself! But it doesn't have enough resources to continue on like this, you need to stop it!

My eyes grow wide as I attempt to stand up and fail miserably. My entire body is aching with extreme pain... but I feel... everything. I can sense... my entire self. Every bit of muscle, every vein, every pore... My existence itself has revealed itself to me.

And so much more. My Auspex is now permanently activated, although to a lesser degree of detail. The old man in front of me has an immense, colorless soul, stretching around everything within a fifty meter radius... while mine only covers two... he is an existence to which I cannot even compare.

"Boy, what's wrong with you all of a sudden? You weren't this scared of me before..." He asks me with confusion in his voice and I blink."S-scared? I'm.. scared?"

I blink again and the pain momentarily stops. I exhale and soon, I feel nothing again and the old mans eyes grow wide before he shakes his head in disbelief."Never mind. My senses seem to have dulled from not being used in such a long time. There is no fear within you."

Smiling at him as I finally manage to stand up and take a look at the burning mansion, I feel my smile turn into a giant grin."Dozens... no, maybe even a hundred..." I heard myself mutter as I leave the car, holding the car door in order to support myself. The old man turns his head towards the mansion and his confusion soon turns to disbelief."Ah.. you can see them, can't you?"

A nod from me as my newfound hunger returns... for a hundred crimson souls, full of essence are gathered before me."Vampire Hunters... from several different organizations. They've come to investigate the ruins." The old man says with a chuckle.

Turning towards him, I put on my mask and then roll up my sleeve and show it to him."Well, I must say that I enjoyed the drive, old man."

He takes one look at my hand and tilts his head in confusion."Um, I feel the same, boy but.. why are you rolling up your sleeve?"

I blinked in confusion."Well how else am I supposed to pay you for the cab?"

He blinks right back at me before his jaw drops in realization."You... want to pay me.. with.. blood?"

I blink again, even more confused."Is that.. strange?"

"Well yes, boy. In all of my years, you are the first mort-well, ... living person, to offer me blood willingly... as payment, no less." His stupefied look quickly becomes one of disbelief as I simply shrug."Well, are you gonna take the payment or not?"

Shrugging after taking a moment to compose himself and cough into his fist, he replies."Well, don't mind if I do!" And with that, he bites into my wrist. Ignoring the pain as I look onto the mansion, I begin thinking about my plan of attack.

There are thirty people outside and around seventy inside of the mansion. The outside guard are most likely the weakest, mere scouts... but Eadom is not a very stealthy weapon.. unless it can change shape.

A click inside of my mind makes me realize that it is so."Aaaahhh.. now that's a taste I've never felt before... many thanks young one. Also, can you give me your phone for a moment?"

Blinking at him as nanites heal the fang wounds on my wrist, I hand him my android and see him quickly go to an internet site I've never seen before and downloading an app which requires some sort of password. After the installment is complete, he hands me my phone back."There, a little something from me to help you out in the world. If you are in Rome, then clicking the app will give me your location and I will arrive to offer you my taxi services... Otherwise, it is a symbol representing you as one of my... friends."

I look at the app and note its name, Esarxi."Esar?" I question somewhat confused and he nods."My name, boy."

I blink, utterly stupefied."Esar?... as in ESARHADDON?!"

He mimics my stupefied look before his jaw drops once again."You.. your knowledge of history is.. somewhat terrifying, boy."

Grinning at him as I take out Eadom and turn toward the mansion, I say."Guess that trip to Egypt didn't kill you at all, eh?"

He grins right back at me and says."Indeed... I shall cast a barrier around the mansion and wait for you to finish your job. If things go too badly since you are quite wounded right now, allowing me to drink of your blood did not help at all by the way, simply click the app and I shall come to your aid, this time."

A nod from me is the only answer he gets as I focus upon Eadom and watch in amazement as the blade turns into two burning daggers, the flames singing in unison as my hunger reaches even greater levels.

My body is currently in a very dangerous state. The uneven amounts of Qi are fluctuating inside of my body, devouring one another until there's nothing left. All I need to do to fix this, theoretically anyways, is consume enough essence to calm down my Dantian's.

I grinned to myself."Its time to even the scales."


Don't mind me guys and girls! I'm just a line break...


And that is it for this chapter of EUPHORIA! I hope that you've enjoyed it!

Not much else to say here, Sumerian Vampires FTW. Also yes, Esarhaddon is a real antediluvian ruler. He ain't made up. :D

... And yes, he is inspired by Cain from Vampire: The Masquerade, one of my favorite games of all time. In fact, just about everything vampire in my story is inspired by it.


Anyways, read and review! And Good Morning/Day/Night to you all! ADIOS FOR NOW!

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About the author

Lord Joyde

  • Požega
  • Mad One

Bio: Rage and Insanity incarnate.

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Comments(19)
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gaigous @gaigous ago

Thanks for the chapter!

Sweet~ dual daggers are always badass

bop369 @bop369 ago

So this story is set about 300 years in the future going by Esarhaddon's age in this story.

ofother @ofother ago

Thanks for the awesome chapter. 

Natsume @Natsume ago

Thanks for the chapter! As awesome as always..Except for maybe a few bit of earlier chapters.

valheru @valheru ago

Thanks for the chapter 

Epicmission @Epicmission ago

3000 years old, shouldn't that be celebrating his 31st century? Not 30th as the MC mentioned.

ninja baiano @ninja baiano ago

Woah the whole discovering the age and somehow finding something that random by talking with the cab. Would be bullshit plot armor on anyother novel but it fits for this one kek.