Ben is on vacation in Greece when a drunken mistake made in an attempt to help a stranger earns him the wrath of a god. Ben is banished to Hell, a world far from Earth that is a prison for the prisoners of war that the gods had taken in their conquests throughout the universe. Hell is a place filled with mystical and alien creatures, objects and phenomena unexplainable by science, and legends both living and dead. Ben must do his best to survive and grow in this world, where opportunity and danger come hand in hand, and eventually become strong enough to challenge his jailers.
A fantasy LITRPG story set in a vast world and filled with characters of all kinds.
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|Chapter Name||Release Date|
|Chapter 1: prologue||ago|
|Chapter 2: Judgement||ago|
|Chapter 3: a new world||ago|
|Chapter 4: desert destination||ago|
|Chapter 5: Conflict||ago|
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Zeus is really kind of a git.
After an unfortuante transgression committed by a drunk, but ultimately well-meaning Ben, he finds himself trapped in what is essential a hellish domain where power rules and stats don't mean what he thinks it means.
Style: Out of everything, I like the style the least. Main issue is mostly with the formatting as without some differentiation, sometimes the skills, thoughts, and non-standard prose bleed over into each other. In terms of the prose itself, it's alright. The language is not overly verbose as to become a chore to read nor its a lyrical masterpiece. What it does do usually is present the details in a easily digestable way. There is a bit of raw exposition especially when it comes to the magic system and the setting behind hell, but I find that it's not that hard to get through since the chapters are not overly long. It also does decently to support the story.
Story: Pretty early on, but the concept is interesting: poor, decent guy ends up stabbing Zeus after catching the god attempting to commit degeneracy and ends up being sent to hell for it. The idea behind it is amusing but also does two very useful things: it gives the reader sympathy for Ben because he's undeserving of this; it gives Ben very clear motivation to try to develop and survive. Better than him being dropped somewhere and left directionless.
There are a great many directions the writer can expand Ben's story from here. It will be interesting to see how things go.
Grammar: Not too bad. Probably needs some cleaning up with an editor, but overall, it doesn't detract too much unless you really, really tear into the grammar (but in doing that, you'd likely be obliged to massacre a good deal of other written works). Can be improved but won't annoy you with incomprehension.
Character: Characters are a mixed bag mainly because we haven't had enough meat sample yet. Ben himself isn't a overly complex guy. A few things are clear though. He is decent. He's not a coward--though definitely not immune to being terrified, he will try to do the right thing even if there is a cost. What probably helps the reader attach to him is a mixture of fish-out-of-water vulnerability and Ben not being overly passive.
What is established for him is that there are certain things in his capacity to affect (his choices; trying to stop what he deems to be immoral; how her perceives this world.) and what is beyond it (the metaphysics of the setting; the power of other characters; his present weakness). The best way I can call him now is simple, well-meaning, brave, and vulnerable.
He really didn't ask for this.
There are a few other characters introduced but there's not much detail about them yet. There is a very expository character placed early on that I think could've been streamlined a bit. The most recently introduced characters are a mix as well, showing that not everyone trapped in this hell is the same. Some are there for a reason. Some aren't. Ben gets to deal with both kinds of people.
Overall, this isn't a complex and arduous read, but provides enough conflict, growth potential, and failure for Ben that there's some potential for development here.
Drunken Ben gets a one way ticket from modern Greece to LITRPG Hell. The Prologue gives you all the momentum you need to excitedly dive into the story.
STYLE: The style is a mixture that swings from smooth and formal wording to casual expressions and out-of-story references. This lightens the story at the cost of some seriousness at times. Still, it is very enjoyable and readable. The writer does a good job of "show-don't-tell" but does occasionally do both "show" and "tell" while avoiding too direct repetition. Humor is abundant and will keep you smiling through most of the story.
STORY: It has a solid standard LITRPG setup; MC ends up in a new world and has to progress within the system. The setting is great as the writer's imagination gives a flex. The execution thus far is great, with some violence scattered throughout the beautifully crafted world.
GRAMMAR: The grammar is very good, with very few mistakes. Only in one part does the story diverge from 3rd person to 1st person, though I'm unsure if that is intended.
CHARACTER: The MC, Ben, is the sole focus for the first few chapters with hints of side characters that will join the fray. Ben is an idealist and a thinker, though does tend to move instinctively at times. Ben's physical description is lacking a bit for now.
OVERALL: Reading this was fun and not tiresome at all. Would recommend.
A fun read with only a few minor issues. The story is entertaining and Ben, the main character is likeable.
Style - The style is okay. It's perfectly readable and doesn't make you want to claw your eyes out, but there are three things to note. Chapter length is short. Some people would like this and some people won't. If you're a busy person, the short chapters are great, you can do a quick read during a break time. Second is the 'system' notifications aren't set apart from the regular writing. So it sometimes gets lost in the story. Third is descriptions and pacing. I'm writing these as one because they walk hand-in-hand.
The author tells a lot. This is the biggest issue in this story, in my opinion. One key moment to point out with this glaring issue is when the Mc wakes in the new world. We are told by the author that the MC is having what is happening and why its happening explained to him. That's it. We don't see the conversation, we don't see the MC's reactions, physical, emotional, or mental.
The author doesn't use the MC's five senses to aid with the descriptions, so scenes sometimes feel flat because you can't picture it.
Story - The story is good. It's interesting and amusing at times.
Character - Ben is a nice and likeable guy. The author clearly intends to work with character development, so it would be interesting to see where he goes. There are a few moments where he's actions are questionable and you can't tell if it's his personality or plot convienance, but the story isn't long just yet, so we'll see in future chapters if it's simply his personality. Due to the style issue of descriptions and the Mc's senses and emotions not being shown well, there are times when the character feels rather flat, but it's a style issue as i said and not a character issue.
Grammar - I spotted no grammar issues myself.
Funny hook. Ben angers Zeus and gets thrown into prison. I love the focus on character development, Ben feels alive, his choices are organic, the setting is new, and comedy is refreshing. Highly recommended novel, Give it a read. Sad that there's only 5 chapters. Can't wait to read what our cardinal sinner does next to reach the maple tree!
A drunk idiot stabs a god and ends up in Hell, only to find out Hell is a LITRPG. There's only five chapters out at the time this review's being written, but I like what I see so far.
STYLE: It's well written and easy to read, with simple but effective descriptions. The fight scenes are well choreagraphed, the MC is likeable, and the bits of humor are both funny and spaced out enough they don't detract from the drama. It's got good pacing and clever dialogue. Most of the jokes land.
STORY: Aside from the setting, this is a pretty standard LITRPG. MC gets dumped in a new world with a system, and has to find ways to build himself up to survive. While it's not breaking any molds, it is well executed and makes for a fun read. The tone is relatively light, but it doesn't shy away from violence or darker themes.
CHARACTER: Most of the character development is focused on the MC, who is an average, if likeable, dude. The other characters seem a little one-note, but that might change as the story progresses. We'll see.
GRAMMAR: The grammar is excellent. I didn't notice a single mistake.
OVERALL: This is a fun little series. Would recommend.