Rock Falls, Everyone Dies

Rock Falls, Everyone Dies

by zechamp

Warning This fiction contains:
  • Gore
  • Profanity
  • Traumatising content

By a stroke of fate, a stone gains sentience and sets out on a grand quest to touch grass. 

However, the system forgot to change its stats from their [Metric] values to the appropriate [Str, Int, Dex] values.

Things escalate. Fast. 

- Cultivation 
- Jade Beauties
- Numbers go up (Ridiculously up. All of them)
- Most balanced protagonist of all time (is round, so is balanced)

Thank you Sininenblue for making this cool cover for me! You a legend.

Previously titled DMG=MA

  • Overall Score
  • Style Score
  • Story Score
  • Grammar Score
  • Character Score
  • Total Views :
  • 504,913
  • Average Views :
  • 24,043
  • Followers :
  • 3,371
  • Favorites :
  • 1,876
  • Ratings :
  • 1,852
  • Pages :
  • 128
Go to Table of Contents
Fiction breaking rules? Report


Word Count (14)
250 Review Upvotes
RRM January 2023 Winner
Top List #5

Leave a review

Sort by:

I read this while laughing hysterically, so this review may be slightly biased. HOWEVER! I can say for sure that this story takes a simple premise (a rock falling down a mountain) and executes it wonderfully, by giving the stone access to a LitRPG system. Will the rock accelerate? Will it grow in size? Most likely, both!

All I know is that there will be a trail of devastation and blood left by this rolling boulder, and I'm here for it. As a sidenote, the cover is absolutely amazing, and sets the comedic tone for the story perfectly.


The above review was posted 7 months ago, back when there was only a single chapter. For all this time I have waited patiently for more, and zechamp has finally delivered! 

Catching up to this was a delight, mainly due to how rock-solid the premise was, and how faithfully it's been executed thus far. Specifically, it's extremely funny to me how well plot twists have been implemented, considering this is literally a story about a rock rolling down a mountain. 

This is truly a hilarious story, and I await more with great anticipation. Enjoy!

Advanced Review Subcategories : 

Style : Clever and sardonic, the prose has really made this work into an engaging masterpiece. 

Story : There's a clear goal established from the beginning, and measurable progress is consistently made.

Grammar : Impeccable, I noticed no issues in this area.

Character : Best rock protagonist I have ever seen.🗿 


I do not really write reviews but in this instant I feel like I have to. Chapter 8 is just that good. I will not spoil anything, just know that when you get to that point in the story that you will gain the spark that will lead you to understanding my extremely favourable review.

Slifer274 (Aaron Shih)

This story addresses every issue that Royal Road readers might ever have with litRPGs.

Problem: Numbers that don't make sense. Solution: Enter the glorious power of PHYSICS.

Problem: Poor pacing that draws arcs out forever. Solution: 500 years of nothing.

Problem: Main characters aren't proactive. Solution: This rock is rollin'.

Problem: The main character hates killing. Solution (chapter 11 spoilers): 

Assist Experience received:

23 x [Civilian] & 89 x OTHERS



DMG = MA is part of a new wave of litRPG. Will this wave of inanimate objects killing everything in their path ultimately wind up being a single pebble in the endless field of litRPG? Or will they become the [Avalanche] that Zechamp promises?

There's only one way to find out.

This story may be called a 'meme' by some, but Zechamp demonstrates an artful mastery of the concepts that make a litRPG good. The number (of the rock's velocity) goes up satisfyingly, and the story has been a blast to follow so far. What's more, the author actually has a plan to take this to the end, so it won't overstay it's welcome.

Overall rating: 5/5 would rock again

Want some physics knowledge? Here:

Kinectic Energy = 1/2 * mv^2

F = ma

e = mc^2

Your Next Favorite Fiction = Rolling Stone LitRPG



They see me [rolling], they [hating].

Reviewed at: Epilogue 2 – Sisyphus

This story manages to maintain a sense of wonder - despite having read alot of stories and gained a pretty good ability to predict events... this one still manages to surprise me again and again. 

What direction will he go? left or right? Those are the only two options right? Wrong, he will become a nuke.

The worst part is everything makes sense in the moment. You know its completely preposterous but you are completely on board.

Can't wait to see what happens next.

Update: The story went from great to great as it managed to achieve something many series fail at - finishing and sticking the landing.

It's short enough and good enough I'd recommend it to anyone.



I chuckled.  I cringed.  I got a lot of references.


Most satires are pretty minimal.  This series is pure satire, very well done satire.  Seriously, I cringed at times, not because it was bad, but because it showed the silliness of so many genres.


Now excuse me, I have a friend that needs to start reading this.


A rock goes on an adventure and discovers the truth of this world, gaining size and strength all the while.

Albert Einstein once said that world war 3 would be fought with rocks.

He was wrong.

It would be fought with one rock. This rock.

A truly amazing story.

🗿 🗿 🗿 



As the cover and title shows, this is about a rock. An OP rock. This rock is so OP that he can kill foes 10 levels higher than him. Do you need to know anything else? Just read it already.

Ok fine, if you need to know more, then HERE:

He gets a legendary quest to get to the bottom of the mountain.

And a major spoiler here:

Are you sure you want to know?

100% sure?

Ok, fine. 

The MC never finishes the quest.







This Rocks (someone had to say it)

Reviewed at: Rolling Out

Such a brilliantly simple concept with so much potential to be an ablsolutely hilarious ride. I already want to see this CG animated and narrated by some award winning British actor. I know this one is probably going to take a while but I'm patient... (hits "follow" after posting this review.)


This story made me cheer for a rock. Despite the premise this story is not as simple as it seems. I was definitely surprised at how much world building went on in the background. I've read a lot of lit RPGs and monster evolution stories and I still have no idea what could happen when this rock finally completes their quest. 


This is definitly a comedy.

An occasionally dark, bloody comedy, but a comedy none the less. And it's hilarious. 

This [Rolling Stone] shall [Rock] the [World]!

Hmm, I wonder if it can get a clan of dwarves to worship it? "Rock and Stone!" Might help if it could talk though.