Fallen
by PinkRose0106
- Traumatising content
Hundreds of years ago, the servant god Elsyn declared that they would destroy humanity entirely, explaining it as their duty as humanity’s peacekeeper. When the gods saw it fit to send someone to oppose the fallen servant, Iztris—the gods’ own servant and follower—visits Cheryn. Iztris requests the aid of Alyson and Jacob, the oldest two heirs of Cheryn and the only ones given the gods’ offer of the ‘assurance of victory,’ and the heirs agree. There will come a time when humanity does fall—but none of them would allow that to happen by the hands of a being just as flawed as mortals.
I recommend reading the story by volume, instead of by the order the chapters were posted.
This story was beta read by Mad Sadie. Many thanks!
Please note that some characters use different pronouns depending on the chapter’s view and the speaker. Iztris, for example, is referred to with neutral pronouns by Elsyn (in most cases) and themself, and after being introduced as such they are referred to with male pronouns by Alyson and Jacob.
- Overall Score
- Style Score
- Story Score
- Grammar Score
- Character Score
- Total Views :
- 1,513
- Average Views :
- 47
- Followers :
- 6
- Favorites :
- 1
- Ratings :
- 2
- Pages :
- 120
Leave a review
Better than Usual
Reviewed at: Chapter 5: Nothing But A Physical Form
Style:
I do not grade style.
Grammar:
I didn't spot any, could just be me though.
Story Score:
Now this is where it really shines. The highlight of it seems to be the characters, and it does well to get this along. The depths it goes into, crafting the details along with it. Expanding off of a kingdom, and how they serve the gods. Servants of the gods might be required to fight, if they accept that is. So, as it can be guessed, this is what the time is being taken to decide towards. The story does well to build up the situation, really touching on the senses.
Character Score:
Their personalities looks to be quickly learned, and how they are established. I cannot say if this is necessarily a good or bad thing, but this is me. Bottom line is, it works. Just know, the story looks to be character driven.
Over all:
A solid read, and one I can recommend for sure. It will take a bit of time to get into, but I believe you'll be pleasantly surprised. Just give it sometime, and follow along. It is a vast story, and the effort put into it is shown.
A Satisfying Read
Reviewed at: Chapter 11: Talk of Nations
To sum up my experience reading this in one word, I would use either "comfy" or "satisfying", like that feeling you have after taking a nice nap on one lazy afternoon. There's a certain charm to this story, something that enticed me to read more and more. However, no piece of literature is without flaws, and as much as I like this work, I do have some issues with it.
Style:
First thing first, diction, I love the diction in this work. You can clearly see the author chose certain words to enhance both the narrative and dialogues in the story, and it was employed in such effective and seamless manners it flowed naturally. Second would be the rather direct and to the point this story is, something that is note that often seen in stories such as this. However, the third thing I want to talk about is something that kind of worsened my experience reading this work. Sometimes you would find yourself reading an extra chapters or story here and there, disrupting your immersion reading the story. I'm not saying the chapters themselves are bad, if anything they held the same standard as the main chapters, but it would be much better to put them in a less disruptive manner than they currently are
Story:
One thing that I quickly note as I read through the story, is how much of a character-driven this work actually is. And althouh the story has quite a fast pace to it, if what you're looking for is an action-packed story, then you might be dissapointed in that regard. Like a road trip story, interactions between characters is key in this work, a very appealing thing if that's your sort of stuff. There are certains aspects of mystery and atmosphere that made this work feels...grander, like an epic of sort hidden through it's simplistic facade, another element of "duality" that I note is sprinkled throughout the story so far. However, just I note above, the extra stories kind of ruin the pacing of the story, especially it kinda break the immersion of some of the chapters. Not necessarily something that made me stopped reading the work, but it could be presented better.
Grammar:
Don't really have anything to say here, didn't see any flaws at all.
Character:
Just as how quickly the story is introduced to us, the characters are also presented in certain manners that makes you able immediately learned who they are, their personalities, and their "voices". In just a few paragraphs of narration and dialogues, the author managed to create hooks that would make any readers feel attached to them. As I mentioned before, this work is (at least to me) a very character-driven story, and it wouldn't work as effectively here if not for the strong presence each and every characters have.
Overall, a nice read, would be back for more