They Shall Call Me EMPRESS (Cultivation Tales of an Isekai'ed Life Coach)

They Shall Call Me EMPRESS (Cultivation Tales of an Isekai'ed Life Coach)

by CLRobison

Warning This fiction contains:
  • Gore
  • Profanity
  • Sexual Content
  • Traumatising content

Meet Lynn Lee: yoga instructor, personal trainer, life coach, and smoothie enthusiast...

Not a mystical martial artist.

Lynn is nobody special, and yet she awakens to find herself in somebody else's body in a merciless medieval world of martial arts cultivators and superhuman muscle wizards. And, what's more, the quirky meditation technique she's been practicing for years somehow gives her an edge over most of the locals. The only question is... will Lynn survive long enough to take advantage of it?

They Shall Call Me EMPRESS is my quirky take on the cultivation novel, a story of a fitness enthusiast Cali girl transported into a realm of immortal warriors and trying to survive... and maybe even thrive beyond her wildest imagination.

Chapter updates on Sunday, Wednesday, and Friday. Plus, sometimes I accidentally upload chapters on Tuesdays, which will either stand in for the Wednesday chapter or be a weekly bonus chapter. It is a mystery!

Please also check out my other novel, The Shadows Become Her

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The storytelling and writing are both good, and I am entertained, so this is ultimately a positive review. But I have some problems with this MC.

I was initially excited for this premise, since since it's extremely rare to see a protagonist like this in any sort of novel, let alone a cultivation novel. However, I sense that the author almost disdains the sort of person they are writing about. 

The protagonist is a total airhead who doesnt consider the consequences of her actions, and will screw people over on accident a lot. She is incredibly dense and unable to pick up on cues.  She is vegan for no reason despite eating meat every chance she gets. 

I assume the goal is to have the MC grow over time, but I dont see why the MC started here in the first place. She could have just as easily been a hippie yoga girl with some degree of forethought and self preservation. 


The story is fairly interesting but you will have to turn off your brain at everyone's thought processes. 

The villains are nothing but cutout baddies that can only think three things that consist of that's pretty, me like pretty, how dare you not bow before me.

Normally entire towns are exempt from the protagonist and their groupies' stupidity in stories. Unfortunately, these ones are not. 

The townspeople seen to have no problem conducting in shenanigans that will get them violent reprisals from their local tyrants, but it is okay since they seem to not be able to think past the next five minutes.

Overall the story could be good so long as you can look past that nonsense. I unfortunately have difficulty doing so.

Leahcim Zanathax

There's a lot to like about this story, which is unfortunate, because the MC is not one of those things.

She is a shallow, immature young woman with zero ability to consider the consequences of her actions ahead of time.

In fact, if it was possible to have a negative ability to consider consequences ahead of time, she would be the poster child for it.

Saying she's an airhead is insulting to airheads.

You get the idea.

Some of the side characters are genuinely interesting, and the world and idea behind the MCs cultivation are genuinely neat.

Unfortunately, the MC is kind of important for a story, and she's unbearable to read about.  At least for me.


I came from the author's other story and thought, well, he writes really well, there's no harm in trying. And I loved it !! Give it a try, just the writing style is on another league from standard RR quality. 

I need to write a bit more... Well I hope it goes without saying that we have a good plot, rounded up characters and kind of funny, since the MC doesn't understand xianxa at all. 



crappy cultivation stuff on RR part 567

Reviewed at: -New Patreon Announcement!-

Its not horrible and if you like all the generic cultrivation stuff you will probably like this but for people seeing this on trending or whatever its only rated so well cause the author has an established fanbase not because its so good in any way.

Suggestions to author

- Some males are decent human beings (some...)

- Mabye change something about the cultivation system, its very generic

- the world building is not very well done and everything blurs together 

Some people do like this stuff and the grammar is good so if its for you go for it, but its not for me.


Extremely fun, and well written

Reviewed at: 13. A Big, Ghostly Finger

They Shall Call Me Empress is the best cultivation story I have read. It takes all of the common premises and features of the genre, and provides it's own fresh interpretation of them, without feeling like a mockery. I love this story, and you will too. 

Lynn Lee is a fitting main character for the story being told, her lax nature and cluelessness are in harsh contrast with typical main characters, yet she still has captured my attention, and I am invested in her journey. I will say that it can be somewhat frusturating to watch Lynn stumble around confused, but I vastly prefer it over a character who is perfect and always knows what to do; flaws are a huge part of characterization, and cultivation growth is all the more fulfilling when there is simultaneous mental or emotional growth. 

This author's writing style flows beautifully from scene to scene, perfectly capturing the story with exquisitely detailed descriptions, and a brisk pace. Additionally, I have not personally seen any grammar or syntax errors, and the ones pointed out by others are fixed promptly.

The overarching plot thus far is simply the cultivation progress of the main character, which makes perfect sense for a story of this genre. However, everything else feels like it too has a purpose, whether it be to build characterization or expand worldbuilding, nothing feels out of place. 

Overall, I really have enjoyed this story thus far, and highly reccomend reading it. 

Disclaimer : This is an edited review, my initial review only covered the first chapter, I hope this new review more accurately represents the story, though I do stand by my initial perception that this story would be uniquely good. 

Gibb, Occasionally Omnipotent Annoyance.

Firstly: I'm only 10 chapters in, but thus far this hasn't lived up to a single word of the hype. The world is the same random whorl of names and cities that all blur together, tied together under the generic Empire, with its leader, the Emperor. really creative stuff.

The cultivation system is the same as every other 'let's justify an op mc!' cultivation story ever devised. Standing in sunlight gets you sun chi, which is against moon chi, but no matter what, you punch harder and that's all that really matters. At leat until the mc gets the "Insert Unique Chi Type Here" which makes them immune to consequences and able to deflect my ability to give a shit!

The characters are almost all single-note cut-outs. They only have one, or in extremely rare cases, two settings. (A personal aside, the way male characters are handled is extremely dickish. Every one of them has been abusive, savage or perverted/rapey.)

The reviews agree with me on the 3rd point: The protagonist is just stupid, but her narration is the only thing keeping this from being unreadable, so maybe that balances out.

Overall, generic world, one-note characters, bargain bin cultivation system, idiotic protagonist. Not a fun time.

Bobby jobby

Huh . I'm pretty speechless here , this story has all good parts of Isekai and all the good parts of a cultivatetion story . Story also pretty fast pacing wise but not too the point of being unintelligible (which in my opinion is way better than being to slow ) . No noticeable spelling mistakes . Character look interesting so far . I'm definitely going to keep reading .

Ducking Duck Duck

We're still in the freethrows of the first 10ish chapter but I'm really looking forward to how Lynn's story will play out. The characters are intriguing and I'm defintely interested in how the world will be fleshed out (hopefully) in the future. Very curious about how this will turn out! Quack!

- A humble duck


Lynn is a lovable 20 something who is cast adrift into fantasy. The story starts off well with a good glimpse into the world and the Isekai being moved from event to event. 


I will say that I am hoping the MC starts some growth soon now that things have become more stable so we explore her unique talent and perspective and let her become more fleshed out than so.eone who seems in shock.