A note from Well Rounded Idiot

Ainz making some [Message] calls to some of his minions. A bit short, I'm afraid.

“[Message]. Cocytus.”

“[Ainz-sama. How. May. I. Serve. You]?”

“[What’s the situation in the Draconic Kingdom]?”

“[Everything. Is. Proceeding. According. To. Plan. The. Theocracy. Forces. Have. Divided. Into. Three. Columns. To. Prevent. Us. From. Reaching. The. Capital. But. We. Have. Bypassed. Two. Columns. Emperor. Jircniv. Is. Personally. Leading. The. Rest. Of. The. Imperial. Legions. To. Divert. Those. First. Two. Columns. He. Will. Go. Around. Them. And. Rendezvous. With. Us. At. A. Convenient. Location].”

“[Excellent, Cocytus. Now]-”

“[Ainz-sama. Forgive. My. Rudeness. But. I. Wish. To. Make. A. Request].”

“[Go ahead].”

“[Thank. You. Ainz-sama. I. Wish. To. Request. Permission. To. Take. Prisoners. Much. Like. The. Lizardmen. I. Believe. It. Would. Be. To. Nazarick’s. Loss. If. We. Wipe. Out. The. Theocracy. Forces. Their. Spirit. Is. Like. Fire. And. I. Am. Against. Extinguishing. It. Entirely].”

“[I understand how you feel, Cocytus, but is that the only reason you wish to take any prisoners]?”

“[No. Ainz-sama. I. Believe. That. We. Can. Use. The. Theocracy. To. Strengthen. Your. Hold. On. Your. Vassals. I. Discussed. The. Matter. At. Length. With. Demiurge. And. We. Concluded. That. Conquering. The. Theocracy. Is. In. Nazarick’s. Best. Interest. Much. Like. With. The. Lizardmen].”

“[What did you and Demiurge come up with]?”

“[Demiurge. Said. We. Can. Use. The. Pious. Culture. And. Nature. Of. The. Theocracy. To. Influence. The. Beliefs. Of. Our. Vassals. Over. Time. To. Cement. Their. Loyalty. We. Would. Not. Be. Able. To. Do. So. As. Quickly. If. The. Theocracy. Was. Mainly. Widowed. Spouses. And. Orphaned. Children. Filled. With. Resentment].”

“[A good point, Cocytus. I am greatly pleased that you have placed the future of Nazarick above a personal vendetta of mine and Shalltear’s! This is what I expect of my Children. Well done, Cocytus].”

“[Ainz-sama. I. Do. My. Duty. To. Nazarick. And. To. You. Especially. I. Am. Honored. By. Your. Gratitude. Ainz-sama. But. It. Is. Reward. Enough. To. Know. That. I. Have. Served. Adequately].”

“[I will insist on giving you a reward, Cocytus. But we will discuss that later. If there is anything that comes to mind, let me know].”

“[As. You. Wish. Ainz-sama].”

“[Very well, Cocytus. You have outdone yourself again. I will let you return to your task].”

“[Thank. You. Ainz-sama].”

“[End Message]. [Message]. Demiurge.”

“[Greetings, Ainz-sama! May I please have just a moment? I am personally conducting a surgical experiment. It is rather hard to hear you with the subject screaming here. The newest herd of sheep tend to struggle a lot. There we go, it’s nice and quiet now. Aw, a pity. This one showed some promise. I suppose it couldn’t survive after all].”

“[Is this a good time, Demiurge? I don’t wish to interrupt your important experiments or your work at the Farm].”

“[No, please, Ainz-sama, You are too kind! Anything You wish to communicate to me is far more important than my experiments. This test was just a simple unanesthetized exploratory surgery of the nervous system and its reactions to various acids and poisons. In the process, I have learned of the existence of unbelievably small creatures that I call Animalcules, based on one of Tabula Smaragdina-sama’s texts1 in Ashurbanipal. I had just made my eighteenth incision when You]-“

“[I understand, Demiurge. You can tell me more about your experiments later. I simply wished to offer my compliments].”

“[You are most kind, Ainz-sama. May I inquire as to how I deserve such a high honor?]”

“[I just spoke with Cocytus about our plans with the Theocracy. I agree with his conclusion and yours].”

“[Sasuga, Ainz-sama. Your modesty is inspiring. But surely we both know that You had long ago considered this matter, before it even crossed our minds. I am truly awed by Your humility and Your grace towards us, allowing us to serve you].”

“[Er… Yes, Demiurge, I am pleased that you yourself are aware of the truth. Now I would like you to consider a possible reward. Have something in mind for once we finish with the Theocracy].”

“[I understand, Ainz-sama. Thank You for Your great kindness. I will think of something].”

“[Good. That is all, Demiurge. I apologize for interrupting Your experiments].”


“[End Message. Message]. Shalltear.”

“[-Unnnfff… Hahhh… Hhhah… Yesss]!”


[I-Is that Ainz-samaaaa’s voice?! I’m so… so pent up my imagination is just… YES! I’m so closeeeee to… to… I’ve been going for three hours, Ainz-sama! Just to last longer than that fat ape when I have my first time with You, Ainz-sama! Just a little longerrrr, Ainz-sama, my love! I love You soooo much, Ainz-sama! Harder! AH! YESSS! It’s- I’m-I’m-I’m going to]-”

“[End Message]! Ugh… I’ll try again later. [Message]. Narberal Gamma.”

“[Ainz-sama. I have returned from the Theocracy. Shall we form a search party to extract Pandora’s Actor from]-”

“[No, there’s no need].”

“[A-As You wish, Ainz-sama, but may I mention that Pandora’s Actor is Your only creation, Ainz-sama]?”

“[You may. That will not change anything for now. Are you alright]?”

“[Yes, Ainz-sama. The Theocracy forces are stronger than most humans, but next to us they are pathetically weak. I personally took on three members of their Black Scripture. Gloom Herald, an arcane magic caster of the 5th tier, Divine Chain, who specializes in area control and denial, and Myriad Barriers, one of the group’s tanks. There is also their leader, the Captain I believe he is called. A powerful spearman. I observed that they also have a priestess, likely named Divine Chant. There are still eight other members whose powers I could not assess, as well as the World Item user].”

“[Excellent! Now, I want you to get some rest, and think of a possible reward. I’ll ask about it when we finish with the Theocracy].”

“[A-Ainz-sama! Serving you is]-“

“[I won’t take no for an answer here, Narberal].”

“[Herr Ainz. Please. I do not deserve Your]-“

“[I-Is that… German? Did Pandora’s Actor teach you German]?”

“[Ja, Herr Ainz. I will stop if it displeases you].”

“[No, no. It’s fine].”

“[Danke schön, Herr Ainz].”

“[End Message]. GERMAN? [Twin Magic - Message]. Aura, Mare.”



“[Yes, I am. How are things going]?”

“[Great, Ainz-sama! I’m almost starting to like these Holy Kingdom humans, Ainz-sama. The way they talk about You is so respectful and kind, even for humans! I think out of all the outsiders You rule, they understand their place best! Although that’s not saying much]…”

“[Onē-san i-is right, A-Ainz-sama. I-I feel like t-they really really l-like You, even if the ways th-they show it are i-insignificant to y-you. I-It makes me h-happy knowing th-that all of this i-is because th-they saw only a l-little bit of h-how a-awesome You are, Ainz-s-sama]!”

“[Hahaha! Thank you both! I am truly pleased to hear that. Our work in the Holy Kingdom has paid off. Now, both of You have been working incredibly hard, not only to make the map of the world but also repair the Holy Kingdom and dismantle their Great Wall. I wanted to give you my thanks for that].”

“[Ainz-sama! We’re happy enough to work anywhere and anytime for You! What would we be if we weren’t working for You, Ainz-sama]?”

“[Onē-s-san’s right, A-Ainz-sama]!”

“[Your dedication and diligence are things I highly value from both of you. But remember that part of serving me is improving yourselves with rest and recreation. Be sure you are resting and taking time to do non-work things that you find fun or relaxing, as long as those things are not destructive towards our subjects. I remember, Mare, that you have a bit of an artist’s eye. When was the last time you were able to sit down and make something]?”

“[E-eeh? I-It’s b-been a few m-m-months, Ainz-s-s-sama]…”

“[I see. Definitely take a day off soon].”

“[Yes, Ainz-sama! We’ll come back to Nazarick tomorrow and take a day off, right, Mare]?”

“[Y-Yeah… t-tomorrow]…”

“[Good. I don’t want to keep you from your business in the Holy Kingdom. I apologize for interrupting].”

“[Ainz-sama… You know You could never interrupt our work. We’re here to answer You whenever You want us to].”

“[Thank you both. End Message]. They’re as bright and energetic as usual. That’s good. [Message]. Albedo.”


“[Albedo! How are things in E-Rantel]?”

“[Quite good. May I ask a question]?”

“[Of course, Albedo. Ask].”

“[Tell me where Ainz-sama is. Is He in the Theocracy, Pandora’s Actor]?”


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Well Rounded Idiot

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