Mana Odyssey

by Forvish

Original HIATUS Action Comedy Harem School Life

After the apocalypse of 2042 where many types of beings that looked like monsters out of story books appeared. Human's called them magical beings, they attack humans indiscriminately. Human's relying on technology to fight this new menace discover that things like gun can’t fight the Magical Beings the people of the world fall into despair. But one day a person invents a mana stone. This stone fuses with a person's soul which enabled human's to use a new type of energy which they called mana which was effective against the Magical Beings the world rejoiced that they had hope once more. With more research it is discovered that everyone's mana is different because everyone's soul is different. In the year of 2069 a war with the the Magical Being's start, the humans lead by 7 heroes fight the demon which is the most dangerous type of monster.The demons were pushed back but the world mourns the many casualty's of the war. For the next 10 year's there is peace, mankind rebuilds the world but the human race knows that peace is ever fleeting. So human's create a school to teach the next generation of mankind children they teach these children subject's from the old world and the new, they train them to fight the Magical Beast's and drill in the knowledge of mankind But one day on the year of 2079 a hero adopts a child that has been experimented on by a scientist, the hero doesn't know but this child will change the fate of the world.

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Author
Forvish

Forvish

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750,000 Views
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Word Count (15)
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Table of Contents
Chapter Name Release Date
Prologue: a hero meeting with a child and he adopt him cause he want it ago
Chapter 1:Must i go to school? ago
Chapter 2:I don't understand why my dad fear my mom... ago
Chapter 3:Is wyfern really that scary? ago
Chapter 4:Team up? ago
Chapter 5:This test is really a pain ago
Chapter 6: What the hell i got a fiance! ago
Chapter 7:Yeah you are strong ,happy now? ago
Chapter 8: A fight between mother and my fiance is scary.... ago
Chapter 9:Meeting with shiroyuki! ago
Chapter 10: Shiroyuki past and problems. ago
Chapter 11:I wonder how this guy survive? ago
Chapter 12:Is this it? ago
Chapter 13:It is too late if you notice it now. ago
Chapter 14:I won't forgive you.!!!!! ago
Chapter 15:After battle. ago
Chapter 16:A Fight between my mom and fiance Is a pain. ago
Chapter 17:The fight between shiroyuki and Riese(start) ago
Chapter 18:Shiroyuki and Riese fight. ago
Chapter 19:Unknown dream. ago
chapter 20:Them again ago
Chapter 21:Homeroom teacher. ago
Chapter 22:Loli Ninja!!!!!!' ago
Chapter 23:You still lack a battle experience ago
Chapter 24:Sorry ,i can't help you this time.. ago
Chapter 25:Shiroyuki Brother ago
Chapter 26: Vs Julius ago
Chapter 27:Brother don't run away yet. ago
Chapter28:Shiroyuki,riesse and Miyuri vs mom (part 1) ago
Chapter 29:Shiroyuki,Riese and miyuri vs Mom (last) ago
Chapter 30:How to prevent crime?Easy just call my dad. ago
Chapter 31:Another Problem of the month. ago
Chapter 32:You better be her boyfriend or i will cut yours. ago
Chapter 33:A hell? Yep i feel it now....... ago
Chaptern 34:I want to smack my head to the wall. ago
Chapter 35:Kidnapped ?Then i just need to make my out. ago
This is not a chapter ago
Chapter 36:Mom?Why you open your mouth like that ? ago
Chapter 37::Don't you dare a waste a food ago
Chapter 38:......An unexpected problems. ago
Chapter 39:Peaceful morning ago
Chapter 40:You overestimate me to much. ago
Chapter 41: Are you an idiot? ago
Chapter 42:Even you have thousand live ,i can easyly defeat you! ago
Chapter 43:Problems solved,but new problems arise.. ago
Chapter 44:A simple wish of mad scientist. ago
Chapter 45:Mad Scientist wish part 2 ago
Chapter 46:Mad Scientist Wish part 3 ago
Chapter 47:Sorry can't do that. ago
Chapter 48:You aren't the same as other ago
Chapter 49:Your real wish are... ago
Chapter 50:I will do it for you.. ago
Chapter 51:I HATE YOU FATHER(Jessica) ago
Chapter 52:The difference between powers. ago
Chapter 53:Mysterios past ago
Chapter 54:....A fight.... ago
Chapter 55:Do you think my house is hotel or something? ago
Chapter 56:......I am not weak! ago
Sorry again there is something to do ago
Chapter 57:How to get wolf as pet. ago
Chapter 58:Liese and riese ago
Chapter 59:Now what we must search? ago
Chapter 60:The Hell is wrong with this people brains ago
Chapter 61:Holy Emperor, i have questions for you... ago
Chapter 62:.....At home....... ago
Chapter 63:I will let forvish know about your 'special' book ago
Chapter 64:Vs Holy emperor part 1 ago
Chapter 65:Vs The Holy Emperor part 2 ago
Chapter 66:Vs The holy emperor(Riese dad) last ago
Chapter 67:Cheater! ago
Chapter 68:Peaceful week?Impossible! ago
Chapter 69:Oni-chan(Miyuri) ago
Chapter 70:This is for my family. ago
Chapter 71:lunchtime =Suffering ago
Chapter 72:I can't believe no one except you. ago
Chapter 73:i don't care what she is! ago
Chapter 74:Fox! ago
Chapter 75:Preparation! ago
Chapter 76:Kidness has a limit. ago
Chapter 77:That's all? ago
Chapter 78:Single swords is enough! ago
Chapter 79:What I am doing all this time? ago
Chapter 80:Sorry,i only understand human language. ago
Chapter 81:So?Past is past you couldn't change it. ago
Chapter 82:Aulia return. ago
Chapter 83:No matter what,he is still my dad. ago
Chapter 84:Forvish past(1) ago
Chapter 85:Forvish past 2:Meeting with strange girl. ago
Chapter 86:Forvish past(03):I am sorry... ago
Chapter 87:Neechan,why? ago
Chapter 88:to me she is just a cute girl. ago
Chapter 89:Let me the humble junior show you something.. ago
Chapter 90:Your family! ago
Chapter 91:ah i am late. ago
Chapter 92:I don't believe you. ago
Chapter:93 Vs Aulia part 1 ago
Chapter 94:Vs Aulia part 2 ago
Chapter 95:Vs Aulia part final!Suprise attack! ago
Chapter 96:Test! ago
Chapter 97:Please go with me to the amusement park!(Alice) ago
Chapter 98:Ideal type .. ago
Chapter 99:You goddamn insect!!! ago
Chapter 100:Student council. ago
Chapter 101:Student council prank. ago
Chapter 102:Plan. ago
Chapter 103:Leon and Claire... ago
Chapter 104:Battle operator. ago
Sorry guys becausw the bug the latest chapter is gone ago
Chapter 105 fear. ago
Chapter 106:Dad and mom ago
Chapter 107:Magic is sure convenient. ago
Chapter 108:THAT IS FREAKING IMPOSSIBLE! ago
Chapter 109:I didn't hide it . ago
Chapter 110:Why did they follow us..... ago
Chapter 111:Request ago
Chapter 112:Strenght is relative. ago
Chapter 113:Really,i am amazed. ago
Chapter 114:Then,let her die. ago
Chapter 115:Protype weapon is good. ago
Chapter 116:Offer ago
This is not a chapter. ago
Chapter 117:...........Why i am so unlucky... ago
Chapter 118:School school like there is no tommorow
Chapter 119:The Traitor. ago
Chapter 120:You don't have right to be one. ago
Chapter 121:The mom murderer. ago
Chapter 122:Forvish Room Security!! ago
Chapter 123:Reason ago
Chapter 124:Reason(2) ago
Chapter 125:The truth. ago
Chapter 126:Iris confidence. ago
Chapter 127:That is outrageous. ago
Chapter 128:Stop it!!!! ago
Need a proof reader. ago
Chapter 129:Believe!!! ago
Chapter 130:Mana growth and evolutions. ago
Chapter 131 :Sudden interference. ago
Chapter :132 The answer! ago
chapter 133:Everyone reactions! ago
chapter 134:Leon and Forvish ago
Chapter 135 :Back to sweet home. ago
Chapter 136 :Dinner and Problems ago
Chapter 137:To be stronger ago
Chapter 138:Lune School life ago
chapter 139 :Mock battle ago
Chapter 140:The outcome of match ago
Chapter 141:cheer up! ago
Chapter 142:Night strolling ago
Chapter 143:Respective paths ago
Chapter 144:First impression . ago
Chapter 145:Home visit ago
Chapter 146:Past and revenge. ago
Chapter 147:bet ago
Chapter 148:The result ago
Chapter 149:Night meeting ago
Chapter 150:family safety ago
Chapter 151:Decision and request. ago
Chapter 152:First priority ago
This is not a chapter ago
Chapter 153:Defeat ago
Chapter 154 :Alice way too cheer up ago
Chapter 155:Futile resistance part 1 ago
Chapter 156:Futile resistance part 2 ago
Chapter 157:Futile resistance part final ago
Chapter 158:Fight?There is no need ago
Chapter 159:Parents meeting ago
searching for editor ago
Chapter 160:Jessica wish ago
Chapter 161:Talk with jessica father ago
Chapter 162:A Perfect person. ago
Chapter 163:Yakuza?(Non edited) ago
Chapter 164:I see.....(Unedited ago
Chapter 165:A Choice.(Unedited) ago
Chapter 166:A house for living.(Unedited) ago
Chapter 167:Training.(Unedited) ago
Chapter 168:Cursed of family.(Unedited) ago
Chapter 169:First meeting(unedited) ago
Chapter 170:Flower. ago
Chapter 171:Night talk ago
Chapter 172:tournament: prologue(Unedited) ago
Chapter 173:First match!Easy win? ago
Chapter 174:Conquering the castle ago
Chapter 175:Experimental monster ago
Chapter 176:Proof and Truth ago
Chapter 177:Execution. ago
Chapter 178:True form!! ago
Chapter 179:Weaklings. ago
Chapter 180:The answer. ago
Chapter 181:Redeeming sin. ago
Chapter 182:Yume true worth. ago
Chapter 183;What do you want? ago
Chapter 184:Creation ability. ago
Chapter 185:Be confidence on the path you choose. ago
Chapter 186:Easy going.. ago
Chapter 187:Sudden attack. ago
Chapter 188:Kidnapped. ago
Chapter 189:The next day.. ago
Chapter 190:The objective. ago
Chapter 191:Escape from prison!!! ago
Chapter 192:Arrival at the city. ago
Chapter 193:Julius battle. ago
Chapter 194:The battle just begin. ago
Chapter 195:It should wait !!! ago
Chapter 196:Start of 2 week break. ago
Chapter 197:Going to school. ago
Chapter198:Challenge and gift!! ago
Happy new year!!!I got poll for you!!! ago
Chapter 199:Heroes,you fail as parents. ago
Chapter 200(Finally 200):Brand new arc!1 ago
Chapter 201:1st annivesary yay!! ago
Chapter 202:Hero's plan ago
Chapter 203:Teaching sakura. ago
Chapter 204:Forvish past(4)(Still an Idiot ) ago
Chapter 205:Forvish past(5) When a lie become the truth. ago
Chapter 207:Separation. ago
Chapter 207:Decision of choice. ago
Chapter 208:Born of new power. ago
Chapter 209:End of the battle. ago
Chapter 210:Christmas day. ago
Chapter 211:The end of christmast day.(Unedited) ago
Chapter 212:Feeling inferior(Unedited) ago
Chapter 213:New enemy. ago
Chapter 214:Coming of special guest.. ago
Chapter 215:Grandma thought ago
Chapter 216:At the bottom chapter.. ago
Chapter 217:Cultis city. ago
Chapter 218::I know them. ago
Chapter 219:Decision. ago
Chapter 220:Before the great escape(prologue) ago
Chapter 221:Grand escape 01.. ago
222:Grand escape 02 ago
Chapter 223:Great escape 223 ago
Chapter 224:Grand Escape 04 ago
Chapter 225:Grand Escape 05 ago
Chapter 226:Grand Escape 06 ago
Chapter 227: Grand escape Epilogue. ago
Chapter 228:Day before new year. ago
Chapter 229:How my mom and dad become Idiotic couple?part 1 ago
Chapter 230:Mom and Dad Conflict. ago
Chapter 231:Dad help mom without mom noticing. ago
Chapter 232:Mom Fall in love with Dad. ago
Chapter 233:Mom Confess his love at dad . ago
Chapter 234:Crimson Flame essence 01 ago
Chapter 235 :Crimson Flame essence 02 ago
Chapter 236:Crimson Flame essence 03 ago
Chapter 237:Crimson Flame essence 04 ago
Chapter 238:Crimson flame essence 05 ago
Chapter 239:Crimson Flame Essence 06 ago
Chapter 240 :Crimson flame essence 07 ago
Chapter 241:Crimson flame essence 08 ago
Chapter 242:Crimson flame essence epilogue ago
Chapter 243:Changing of view. ago
Chapter 244: Half year later. ago
Chapter 245:Being unfriendly. ago
Chapter 246:Plagiarism(01) ago
Chapter 247:Plagiarism(02) ago
Chapter 248:Plagiarism(03) ago
Chapter 249:Plagiarism 04 ago
Chapter 250:Plagiarism 05 ago
Chapter 251:Plagiarism 06 ago
Chapter 252:Plagiarism 07 ago
Chapter 253:Plagiarism End ago
Chapter 254:Sadness and Happiness are side of the same coins(01) ago
Chapter 255:Hapiness and Sadness are side of the same coin (02) ago
Chapter 256:Sadness and Happiness are side of the same coins(03) ago
Chapter 257:Sadness and Hapiness are the same side of coins (04) ago
Chapter 258:Hapiness and Sadness are the same side of coins (05) ago
Chapter 259:Endless Nightmare(1) ago
Chapter 260:Endless Nightmare (2) ago
Chapter 261:Endless Nightmare (03) ago
Chapter 262:Endless Nightmare (04) ago
Chapter 263:Endless Nightmare end.. ago
Chapter 264:?????? ago
Chapter 265:Knowing yourself(01) ago
Chapter 266:Knowing yourself(02) ago
Chapter 267:Knowing yourself(03) ago

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Slaggedfire
Overall

Worst harem on royal road period!

Pushy women I hate those the most. it is so irritating when the male MC can’t even say a word to defend himself from misunderstanding or insult.

Skimming through most of the chapters the author clearly thinks harem equates to a very onesided relationship, the MC literally has no real say in any of the conversations it is either the mom or the harem members.

Am I the only person in the world who thinks a harem should have a relationship of understanding? this whole bullying the MC being comedic is not even one tiny bit funny!. Lets go over this overly perfect MC with a mysterious past who has a pushy bossy pissy harem who hate him so much that they won't let him live his life oh excuse me this author seems to think forcing someone into decisions is called love.

I forgot to mention the ninja loli that of course the 2 harem members go kya over because shes so cute *spits angrily in direction of monitor* *wipes monitor* my grammar is shit so I won't comment on his, but what I can say is that he does not even put names at the end or beginning of dialogues meaning you have no idea who the hell is talking.

here is what a conversation is like in this story.

 

"He's MINE! old hag!"

"no"

"YES!!!!!!!"

"no"

"MINE MINE MINE MINE"

"can I go make bre-"

"SHUTUP!"

"ok..."

btw the one who was trying to be a reasonable person and make breakfast was the MC and the one yelling was a harem member fyi that's exactly what she is like she screams and yells and calls people old hag and she bosses the MC around.

 

Forgiv3n324
Overall

going to go with the overall score of the others... Edit* seems the intro got updated so ill give it a shot

I haven’t read one chapter and I don’t know if I should or shouldn’t…

The intro to your story in itself is littered with so many grammatical errors  that I can only assume that the chapters themselves are the same or… even worse… and that is a real turn off.

I don’t want to come off harsh or mean, but honestly the grammar turned me away from giving this novel a chance… 

I’d suggest getting a proof reader before continuing this grammatical monstrosity in my honest opinion…

(though if your perfectly fine with keeping it as it is, and enjoy writing the story I can respect that as well I’m just giving you my opinion)

and like I said since I haven’t read the story I don’t want to give it a bad review or a good one so I just went with what the people before me went with to not influence the score to much just to give my opinion 

 

*Grammar isn't nearly as bad as it was, but still terrable, the women in this series are way to dominate and the MC is just an OP doormat bout sums it up... dropped it after 10 chapters srry m8... 

xanadu
Overall

 it’s a little quote from chap 10, I didn’t change a thing, a simple copy past : 

“Then he still facing his enemies he say to me “Go run to there everyone go there. You will hinder me i you say here.”, then i go run alone and only heard cry of pain from the direction of the boy, but i keep running to search for an help.after1 hour walk, i found my uncle and my brother and their team come back from hunting demon i go to them and tell them everythings.When they heard it ,my uncle is furious so the half of them stay here to protect me and half of them run to the directions of boy.and they come back 1 hour and tell me they don’t found the boy and only corpse of reseacher and the criminal.i am the only suvivor of that accident so uncle and my aunt adopt me and my brother cause their child is dead .”

Actually I didn’t even read your story but after you synopsis I wonder if it was at the same level everywere and … it is .

Like you notice I can’t write like shakespear because I’m not english native but at least I don’t put a story here with so many flaws in it.

Sorry lad.

Holtz
Overall
Style
Story
Grammar
Character

How the hell did this get into the Top 5?

I won’t… I can’t even… Yes; I literally can’t even.

 

The story itself is not that bad, the idea behind it got potential, but this is where the positives stop.

 

Your style is simplistic, your choice of words measly and yet it serves the deed.

 

But now grammar…. Jesus fucking Christ. It is terrabad, absolutely unreadable. It is not merely the spelling, the tenses but also the syntax with sometimes missing punctuation or overall wrongly done punctuation. This fiction is…. it is… I have no words.

 

The characters: Oh how I love them… The one sided sidechicks that can do naught but scream at the protagonist and the dense as rock protagonist that doesn’t do a single shit…. I love it…. not.

 

The fiction is bad, simple as that. It has potential, yes, but it isn’t used…

Tekdg
Overall
Style
Story
Grammar
Character

Ugh...good potential story but very hard to read.

Since I’m not a native English speaker myself, I’m usually very forgiving about grammar and pretty much an expert when it comes to understanding …bad English? Sorry to say this, although the story seem to be good, but the grammar needs a huge improvement. Good luck anyway! Don’t let it get you down, I’m sure this would have been a much better story if you write in your own language.

lolandylol
Overall

interesting but hard to read - initial review

Serious grammar issues which makes it hard to read if youre someone like me who uses text to speech converter to read. All the mistakes add up and ruin the story when hearing it - ps im only on chapter 3 so so it could improve later on.

Despite everything i recommend you give it a go

Kandoral
Overall

Could be good, but not readable

The story could be a good one, but sadly the grammar is so bad that it is unreadable. The meaning of the sentences are most of the time not understandable.

Sorry author but at the level your grammar is now i can only say "don't even bother to read"

It just hurts the eyes and ruins a possibly good story

xamnus
Overall

fucking sucks MC is a bitch, can't do shit, this needs the be rewritten.

TrueDragonSoul
Overall
Style
Story
Grammar
Character

Headache...such a headache...

There was so much potential when this story started. A lot of advise has been given from the get go, but apparently the majority of it has been ignored.

 

I got through the first few chapters when this was still new, but had to give up and put this on my read later list to come back and see if the story quality improved.

 

Sadly upon returning and taking a quick peek at the latest set of chapters all I could see was that almost none of the advise that I had seen people given multiple times had been ignored. Some of said people having some of the greatest stories on this site.

 

The premises of the story itself is wonderful, BUT character building is several lacking, style is weak, and most of all...the grammar...o GOD the grammar. (Of course I can understand grammar problems and can accept them  especially if English is not the primary language, but the degree of error within this story goes beyond what that excuse can cover.)

 

The grammar alone makes this story impossible to continue, and sadly it would be one of the easiest things to fix if the writer would actually listen to what a good portion of the advise that is being given.

PROOFREADING!!!

No signs of proofreading can be seen. Nether the first starting chapters I had read, or the later chapters that I have skimmed over.

 

At this point the only, repeat ONLY, positive thing I can say about this story is the release schedule is fast. Sadly I say that is also probably the biggest contributing factor for why this story ends up on the trash pile.

Drake19
Overall

Pls get a proof reader or someone who knows English or write this in whatever language you are best at. I couldn't even complete a whole chap, it was so bad.