The Kingdom of Malinas (YA Fantasy)

The Kingdom of Malinas (YA Fantasy)

by EmmyJL

Fifteen-year-old Sorrel returns to her home to find it burned and most of her people taken as slaves by Corrinus, the new ruler of Malinas. She's devastated to find her mother is amongst them and swears to rescue her. But her older brother Leif sends her to seek an army, while he remains with the survivors, teaching them to fight. It hurts that everyone says she's too small and too weak to fight, because she wants so much to be like her dead father - a great warrior - but she does as she's told.

She travels across country with her seer friend and faces many dangers – from mysterious grey wraiths to the crazed follower of Corrinus. She set out to find an army but instead, she returns with a dragon.

**

This was one of the very first novels I ever wrote. I wrote this when I was 16/17 (which was many years ago now!) on a really old PC I called Phylis. I remember having to print it out on an old ribbon printer to submit it to publishers - this was back before esubs were the norm! It never got picked up and I ended up self publishing it. I hope you enjoy.

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EmmyJL

EmmyJL

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Table of Contents
Chapter Name Release Date
Chapter 1: The Past & The Future ago
Chapter 2: An Evil Plan ago
Chapter 3: Ambush! ago
Chapter 4: The Aftermath of the Fire ago
Chapter 5: The Hunt ago
Chapter 6: It's All New ago
Chapter 7: Putting Up a Fight ago
Chapter 8: Guests and a Captive ago
Chapter 9: The Seer ago
Chapter 10: Silence Gorge ago
Chapter 11: Threats ago
Chapter 12: A Captive Freed ago
Chapter 13: Nightmare ago
Chapter 14: Dragon Boy ago
Chapter 15: Oh Deer ago
Chapter 16: Dragon Sent ago
Chapter 17: The Theft ago
Chapter 18: Joining Forces ago
Chapter 19: The Chase ago
Chapter 20: Whispers ago
Chapter 21: A Talking Wolf ago
Chapter 22: The Prophecy ago
Chapter 23: Murder ago
Chapter 24: Plots & Plans ago
Chapter 25: A Bad Idea ago
Chapter 26: A Promise ago
Chapter 27: Encountering the Dragon ago
Chapter 28: A Face Full ago
Chapter 29: The Unexpected ago
Chapter 30: A Dragon of Our Own ago
Chapter 31: Time to Act ago
Chapter 32: Twin Dragons ago
Chapter 33: Traitor ago
Chapter 34: Family ago
Chapter 35: Cave Escape ago
Chapter 36: Death ago
Chapter 37: Gate & Conflict ago
Chapter 38: Wraiths ago
Chapter 39: Attack of the Grey Men ago
Chapter 40: Weapons ago
Chapter 41: Revived ago
Chapter 42: The Disguise ago
Chapter 43: Be Prepared ago
Chapter 44: Undercover ago
Chapter 45: Working With the Enemy ago
Chapter 46: Taste of Freedom ago
Chapter 47: To the Castle ago
Chapter 48: Fight with the Slavemaster ago

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An interesting world that feels a little storybook (in the good way) with an adventure brewing in the beginning that promises to be good. 

Style
The writing is pretty good. Easy to read and just descriptive enough. Standard 3rd POV with the focus shifting between a few characters (it is tagged multiple leads). It might hop around a bit too much across scenes since I got the impression from the summary that this would be largely paying attention to Sorrel. 

Grammar
Nothing stood out to me here, so probably pretty clean and proofread.

Story
There are a lot of small scenes, so at times the story feels a little disjointed. Sometimes it feels like it's going by too fast and at other times too slow depending on if the scene is short or long and if there's a lot of detail and introspection or not. I think the story would benefit from a better balance of it all. That said, the story is turning out to be a definite adventure. There's a good sense of tension and conflict that kept me interested. The world is also really charming.

Character
There are a few POV characters, but the most time is spent with Sorrel and there's a good sense of her character because of it. However, the POV isn't really deep most of the time for other characters, so they're a little on the hazy side.

In sum, the multiple leads and short scenes at times makes the story feel a bit messy, but at the heart is a real adventure in a unique world.