Warning This fiction contains:
  • Gore
  • Profanity
  • Traumatising content

What happens when one of the purest angels of God, kills...?

Becca has a past that she just got to recover
She has a secret that she's recalling litte by little
Her world and her beliefs are not what she thought
And it's going to change the whole ballance of things

Even if it stains the whole reality in shades of gray

Updated every other Monday

  • Overall Score
  • Style Score
  • Story Score
  • Grammar Score
  • Character Score
  • Total Views :
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  • Followers :
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  • Ratings :
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  • Pages :
  • 16
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Author
Bentancourt Alexsandher

Bentancourt Alexsandher

Constellation

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drakan_glasses BE NICE! Fair critique is fair, but be respectful & follow the review rules. There will be no mercy.
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T.K Paradox
Overall

This has the making of a very good book. Even thought it is early in devolpment I'd have to say that this story show promise, and makes me feel eager on what will happen next.

After all the base concept is intresting, the idea of angels being various shades of gray instead of being full of black and white to various shades of gray. I have a feeling once the author gets a few more chapters out he will see a large increase of fans of his work

Sincerely, T.K Paradox

Weavervale
Overall
Style
Story
Grammar
Character

And by that I mean, okay this could go somewhere. I see this as a distinctly nice style of writing but it remains to be seen where the author goes with it. 

 

No grammar issues that I could find although overall coat is a nice touch. I want a coat that is also overalls. Usually when I read some grammar issues they pull me out of a read, but this one is just fine. Keep it up.

 

 

 

Criticism: The cover is... well it's fine okay. The thing I'm lacking is a blurbity blurb with a release schedule. Could we get that much at least? 

 

Style: 5/5 No blocking paragraphs so this didn't come across as a problem.

Story: 5/5 Again, there is a lot of promise of the premise and I don't know where this is going yet so, keep in mdin I'm going off the writers skills to convey this initial chapter here.

 

Character score 5/5: OKAY! This is good! I saw some good interactions here and the characters are less "show" more "tell" through their action, CLASSIC GOOD WRITING THERE. Keep that up please.

 

I always give this critique to my writing partner. The only problem I have with your story, besides the blurb... is that there isn't more!

 

Hit me up in a month and I'll update the review.