Dreams or Another World - Not a Zero

Dreams or Another World - Not a Zero

by Dad

No, my name’s not Doug. I lied.

Waking up in this hospital bed and right away I’m being questioned.

They say I’m a hero, saved some girl. I don’t remember any of that.

Like the stories you read, a stranger in a strange world where magic and fantasy races exist, but technology hasn’t advanced.

It was all just a slice of life as I learned and grew in this world.

Was…



Author’s notes.
   Original work. First draft. Inspired by various fantasy games and books. Written with a focus on character development and interaction. Combat, progression, leveling, classes, but no numbers or stats. I’ll try to keep the language clean, PG-13, no smut.
   I’m in the US, writing in English. I intend to complete this story or at least bring it to a proper ending. I have a destination in mind. I find as I write, doors and ideas open, while others close and are discarded. 
​   ​I'm new to creating. My apologies now while I learn. I have not settled on a book cover or artwork, still looking for something that fits.

Registered & Protected #20VjeKDv2U6nynW6

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Author
Dad

Dad

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Table of Contents
55 Chapters
Chapter Name Release Date
Prologue ago
Chapter 1 – Not a Zero ago
Chapter 2 – Surviving a Bear Encounter ago
Chapter 3 – Am I under arrest? ago
Chapter 4 - Temporary ID ago
Chapter 5 – Jaxx, resident silver plate ago
Chapter 6 - Blue ID Band ago
Chapter 7 - An enigma ago
Chapter 8 - Intent ago
Chapter 9 - Not a child ago
Chapter 10 - Catalyst! ago
Chapter 11 - You and your body seem to be a little mixed up ago
Chapter 12 - “Bend” I hear her softly say ago
Chapter 13 - Goblin Commander ago
Chapter 14 - “Fight!” ago
Chapter 15 - Home ago
Chapter 16 - Your mother would not approve ago
Chapter 17 - My name’s not Doug ago
Chapter 18 - “I’m a ranked Bronze. Does that mean anything to you?” ago
Chapter 19 - This is Jack ago
Chapter 20 – Insight into this World ago
Chapter 21 - He is here now ago
Chapter 22 - This must be Grandpa ago
Chapter 23 – "1 + 1 = 2. Truth?" ago
Chapter 24 - Greens Brook ago
Chapter 25 - Awakening Farms ago
Chapter 26 - Skins from my Mother, Bones are Mine. ago
Chapter 27 - Do not disturb the other flowers ago
Chapter 28 - No Swarming! ago
Chapter 29 - In three days ago
Chapter 30 - Not Possible! ago
Chapter 31 - Maybe I’ll just wake up at home ago
Chapter 32 – I’ve got Nothing ago
Chapter 33 - Such are all the daughters of the Root of Aarush ago
Chapter 34 - All things are connected to the Great Trees ago
Chapter 35 - You wanted to help ago
Chapter 36 - You better behave yourself ago
Chapter 37 - If it makes you happy Jack, if it makes you happy ago
Chapter 38 - We will see where this path takes us ago
Chapter 39 – Wolves ago
Chapter 40 - Void magic! ago
Chapter 41 - We’re not going back to Community Farms ago
Chapter 42 - Proof ago
Chapter 43 - The Entrance. The Doors. And No More! ago
Chapter 44 - The familiar sight of Community Farms ago
Chapter 45 – Heal! ago
Chapter 46 – You can come with me ago
Chapter 47 – It is effective ago
Chapter 48 – Maybe someplace, other. ago
Chapter 49 – Yes yes, it’s stupid. I don’t know why they’re doing this. ago
Chapter 50 – Grandma gnome ago
Chapter 51 – Seeds! ago
Chapter 52 – Flowers! ago
Chapter 53 – Chain… ago
Chapter 54 – Shaman ago

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white_rabbit
Overall
Style
Story
Grammar
Character

The story so far has some promise, mostly standard isekai bits. There is some hint that the "magic" system will be interesting, hasn't gotten too far into it yet.

Progression looks like it might be very fast, the protagonist shows symptoms of having all the powers, which might cause issues with pacing/tension. Gets into a fight or two to the death with "no experience" and mops the floor with the bad guys.

Characters are ok. Very straightforward, what you see is what you get.

The intro is kind of weird, I would wait till at least the third or fourth chapter or so before forming an opinion about whether or not you like it. Style generally is ok.

Few grammar/spelling errors so far, seems fairly clean.

Overall, it's ok reading for now, really needs more time to determine if this is going be good or not.

Not sure why there needs to be a 200 word requirement for reviews.
Not sure why there needs to be a 200 word requirement for reviews.
Not sure why there needs to be a 200 word requirement for reviews.
Not sure why there needs to be a 200 word requirement for reviews.
Not sure why there needs to be a 200 word requirement for reviews.

tempast404
Overall

Author has an oracle to give them the exact perfect word count for each scene, and adheres to it religiously.

Except instead of spreading the words across a full scene we get far far far too many words about mostly nothing, and then the words run out, and so the next scene starts.

No resolution, completion, transtion or setup.  We just invisibly pickup elsewhere/when verbosely spend words without context or connection until we run out again and do it all over again.

Like someone took a comic book and used the word budget from the second half of every pannel to try and describe the missing pictures form the first half of each pannel.

I want to say I like the character and story despite the style trashing everything but... do I?  It's hard to tell since I'm filling in half the story myself I might just like the parts I invented to try and force some shred of cohesion or thread of consistency.

It might also be a "clever" use of style to make it feel dreamlike.  But if so, anyone who ever sat and listened to a friend's disjointed hot mess of nonsense they dreamed last night knows that stylistic choice is a stillborn.

Morris Darkstar
Overall

I'm enjoying this story a lot.  The main character is an engineer from our reality who wakes up in a fantasy setting.  He gets banished at one point and wakes back up the next day of his normal life.  Next time he falls asleep for the night, he along with some readied gear go back to the fantasy world.

Zarik0
Overall

This is a really a good work, a well though and done story, i find no fault who come to mind about it only praise

Even my only personnal little dislike about the little social drama and interaction we get about a secondary character (Fenn) who in my opinion is a little bit to much present sprinked in the first 25 chapter is just that, a personnal dislike, and i can state objectively that its been a long time since i dont see and read this type of situation so well though and done by a author

I really like how the author bring thing and how the interaction are in this story

I recommend you try it