The Internet Cultivator

The Internet Cultivator

by JBRhorst

Warning This fiction contains:
  • Gore
  • Profanity
  • Sexual Content

Lan Jin was brought into a new world because of faulty software. Instead of downloading a new browser as he intended, he got magically blown through a wormhole and into a part of reality so far away that even the laws of nature changed. What's more, he brought the internet with him!

How will Lan Jin navigate this mysterious, new and fantastical world? Will he be swallowed up by cultivators and vicious beasts or will he somehow manage to bumble his way through life using a quick search of the internet?

Welcome to a world where survival of the fittest is the only absolute law and everything else comes in second place.

(AN: This is intended to be a longer story so some of tags may not be immediately relevant. In addition, while I will be avoiding actual sexual content there will be explicit nudity in the story and implicit sexual activity of a mature nature. Notice the Grimdark tag; if you don't want to hear about mature sexual content, you may want to avoid this story.)

(P.S. I am in the process of looking for a good artist to commission a nice cover for my work. I had a short list, but the first artist fell through and the second one got banned from the service I was using for fraud. If anyone knows someone who can do xianxia artwork, please let me know. XD)

(P.S.S. The photo I am currently using belongs to Joshua Ang on Unsplash and has received permission from the platform to be used here.)

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JBRhorst

JBRhorst

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fishsandwich
Overall
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Story
Grammar
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All the instructions in the world, but no reading

Reviewed at: Chapter 18: A Bit of Insight

So far a fairly run of the mill isekai cultivation story. A few grammar and spelling issues, but nothing egregious. The world building so far is middling I would say. The supporting cast is starting to become interesting, but the biggest problem is the main character himself. He is super dumb, but not intellectually. He is that type of person that tries to put a some assembly required product together by ignoring 90% of the instructions. In this case, his special gift is literally every instruction manual in the universe and it is just pearls before swine. 

Per author comments, this is intentional in order to setup a future "wakeup call". Well its been 18 chapters and there has been no consequence of note for his frankly stupid actions so far. Add some plot convenience and plot armor for a supposedly grimdark type story and it makes a somewhat frustrating read.

This is especially disappointing because I like most of everything else outside of the main character himself. If you can tolerate the the foolish MC, then by all means go ahead with this story as there is good stuff to be had here. However, the MC is the embodiment of the milennial stereotype seeking instant gratification and that is going to be polarizing unfortunately.

dmitril
Overall

Ok time sink, but dont expect much more. The MC is a cardboard cutout acting unnaturally stupid for the sake of the plot. So far the supporting cast has been the redeeming factor.

Also, this seems to be a classical xianxia with no explanation as to why and how of the cultivation which makes it a big nope for me, though this is personal taste and did not affect my review rating.

Acerbic
Overall

Ye, sorry to be negative here, but I think you ruined your book. You may not care about what I say, and I understand, but I am quitting here.

The beginning was great, really liked it - we get a decent sort of normal person isekai, reasonable enough and no "half-naked goddess" bs.

The Omega browser is a good (for a story) cheat - powerful, yet balanced with how awkward it is to use. Great potential, but in small trickle.

Then you introduced Heavenly Gaze - balance breaking disaster trash. Its just too broken OP - literally zero to rank 1 in one sitting at a cost of mild headache!?.

Physician Bing as a benevolent teacher was already straining the story, and now this Dragon cultivation.... ?! 


So, from tense, confusing and exciting story in chapter 1, we dropped to "super easy" difficulty setting with cheats on. Like, OK for some, but not for me.

I've seen enough of these to know when to cut loses, before offended young masters, face slapped sect partriarchs, jade beauties and tournaments appear.

to do
Overall

Didn't enjoy this one.

The writing was decent and the grammar seemed fine, but there just wasn't anything interesting to grab my attention.

The MC was bland and uninteresting and the system/cheat was overpowered yet also somehow underwhelming at the same time.

Despite the author's attempt to write about a standard xianxia world through the eyes of some random western guy who knew nothing about xianxia, they failed to account for the fact that 99% of people willing to read this story will have at least a passing familiarity with the concepts being introduced, so we are forced to sit through a slog of infodumps and boring exposition on basic concepts.

So far the only real attempts at excitement have been the MC slowly getting more and more interest from his surroundings by making stupid faux-pas one after the other because he is too lazy to learn about the world that he has found himself in.

While the author attempts to assure readers that it will pick up later, nearly 20 chapters in and nothing has really happened besides the MC sitting around and learning some random techniques. The sad fact of the matter is that without a good hook you lose the majority of an audiences interest.

Mohammad Al-Deep
Overall

The Author Made The MC Unnaturally Stupid

Reviewed at: Chapter 9: The Arena

The Mc is smart in some things, but like seriously stupid in others, unnaturally so. 

Even after receiving advices or direct warnings from his own cheat he still do whatever the fck he wants.

So he got trasported to a different world, most people he meets are like demi gods back on earth and still he won't beleive in things he calls ' Mythic bumbo jumbo bullshit' . LIKE ARE YOU KIDDING ME, ALL THIS AND YOU STILL WON'T BELEIVE SHIT.

Gh0st_Writer
Overall

Its pretty good with a clueless guy isekai'd into a cultivation world with a super op cheat .

The mc calls out stupid tropes and is pretty normal except he's pretty inexperienced. Trusting a complete stranger, sharing all sorts of info and overall pretty reckless behaviour which he has been warned against yet he continues to ignore any advice and just does his own thing.

That's the only thing that actually bothered me. The mc seems like a child who only does stuff he's been told not to.

arnoniem
Overall

It is pretty good, a bit long on the explanations, but that is common in this genre. Good satire in its genre and a new nice take. It is not a top 10 Royalroad fiction, but it's fun. I really don't understand the negative reviews at all, but everyone their own i guess. Solid 4/5.

Dive the Bookworm
Overall

The MC does come across as a spoiled teenager, because he is. He does stupid things in the name of laziness, and does not think through his decisions properly. The people complaining about it probably identify too much with him, and feel embarrassed about it.

I guess we'll find out if he makes it through to adulthood unscathed, or if he ends up like Mimir.

Zenopath (AEV)
Overall

Look, I'm not going to lie, this novel isn't perfect. It's actually a bit silly. Not slapstick silly, more like just a general absurdity of the situation and the ease at which the MC uses his overpowered abilities to quickly improve while being generally clueless about how reckless he is being. But that may be the point... I don't think it's meant to be taken seriously.

I am really enjoying reading this. The key is to have the right mindset, this isn't A serious cultivation novel, and the author knows that. It's tongue in cheek, though the characters take themselves seriously, the reader clearly isn't meant to. A lot of this novel is just people reacting to the strange things the MC does. As a foreigner (isekai'd non-asian from modern world) he keeps making people around him react in amusing ways. Also he calls out cultivation novel tropes. I laughed when he checked crime rates... Of course A cultivator world would be a terrible place to live if you think about it.

You have to use suspension of disbelief to enjoy this, and you have to accept it as a subtle comedy, if you are expecting A serious cultivation novel, you will be disappointed. Half A star off because no fight scene yet... Might be a little too slow paced. But this novel is one of few on site that is genuinely amusing to read, so I might give that half star back if author pulls off a good first fight.

P.S. thinking about it I'm no longer sure Satire is the right word. It is a novel that tries to be amusing, pokes fun at cultivation novel tropes, like for example it turns out having good spiritual sense can be mistaken for being a peeping tom because u can use it for seeing underneath women's clothing. That's a deliberate joke. Its a disservice to author to think otherwise. But is it satire or parody? Or is it just dark humor? In some sense this novel is probably like Guardians of Galaxy; meant to be legit superhero movie while also not taking itself seriously. Simularly I do think this is a legit cultivation novel, and can be enjoyed that way, but it just doesn't take itself seriously, in a good way.

Draugluir
Overall

Nice cultivation isekai that I can't wait to read more of!

The MC has a system-like internet connection with a near infinite amount of information in his head, but no context or prior knowledge. Will be interesting to see how much trouble it will get him into, and just how OP information is in this world.