The Butcher of Gadobhra

The Butcher of Gadobhra

by The Walrus King

There is only one AI left in the world, and he has a new game for the world to play. Corporations are ready to slice up the new cyberspace and exploit their human workers. Too bad there's more than one game being played........


EndlessQuestingOnline3 used to b the greatest game ever created. But no more. Produced and run by 106 Autonomous Artificial Intelligences housed in a shielded Quantum Core, the VR world felt nearly real. NPC's reacted like people, the world evolved, civilizations rose and fell. There was a landmass twice the size of the real earth to explore and conquer. Guilds carved out kingdoms. Corporations employed players, bought land, and conducted 21% of the worlds commerce from within the game. 

And then it all came to an end. In one blinding flash, an EMP device of unknown origin was detonated within the shell of the Dallas/Fortworth Quantum Core, crashing EQO3 and murdering 106 beings who were born and lived in Cyberspace.  31% of the worlds population spent at least part of their time in the VR world. They were used to that reality being filled with lifelike NPC's who entertained and served them. To fill the void, millions of poverty level citizens living in the Hab Blocks were hired by corporations. Vast industrial parks were filled with workers who logged into the game using cheap VR gear to play the roll of butlers bandits, pirates and opera singers. It partially filled the gap, but the game continued to decay without the guidance of the AI. 

One AI remains. He keeps the trains running on time, audits your taxes, guards cyberspace and is used by every government in the world. And now he has a new game he wants you to play. A new world he wants you to explore: GENESIS ENGINE

Players rush to be the first legends of GE.  Guilds prepare for their constant wars of bragging and bullshit. Corporations demand land and resources to rebuild their dominance of online business.  Millions of Contract Workers living in the Habitat Blocks wonder if they will still have jobs.

And a few humans who work with the him ponder what kind of game the last AI is actually playing and how deep does his game go?

This is partly a story about the last AI in the world. Feared and yet needed -  But mostly it's about a group of friends who hope to keep their jobs working in VR. In reality they are on the bottom of the heap eating synthetic food and living in cramped habitats. But in the old VR world they were dashing Cyberpirates, skilled entertainers, and servants to the rich and powerful. 

When they find out that their old jobs  are about to end, the group  jump ship to the new game, quickly signing contracts. The Corporations will still need workers, but those contracts have a lot of fine print, and the world is raw and unfinished. They'll first have to build the stage before they can perform upon it. Things will be a lot harder than they expected. The game AI has some odd ideas about making things more difficult for everyone. And the corporation signing their checks is cheating them from the start, making sure they start at the bottom...and stay there.

The while the deck seems stacked against them, the world has more than a few jokers to play. There are quite a few surprises for everyone, including the players, the guilds, and the corporations trying gain control. And in the midst of this chaos, maybe everyone gets a chance  to grab the brass ring.

If you have to swing a mop and not a sword, you'll just have to swing harder, and cheat better.


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The Walrus King

The Walrus King

The Walrus King

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Table of Contents
Chapter Name Release Date
Chapter 1: Cheese and Whine ago
Chapter 2: Sponsored by Bludgeon Brew ago
Chapter 3: A troubling start ago
Chapter 4: WALLY ago
Chapter 5: Welcome to Sedgewick ago
Chapter 6: Who let the players in? ago
Chapter 7: A lot of Bull ago
Chapter 8: The Very Hungry Caterpillar ago
Chapter 9: Death Perspective ago
Chapter 10: Small Talk ago
Chapter 11: Whiskey Run ago
Chapter 12: Squirmies and Bananas and Deer! Oh My! ago
Chapter 13: The Great Rabbit Hunt part 1 ago
Chapter 14: The Great Rabbit Hunt, part 2 ago
Chapter 15: It's been a long week. ago
Chapter 16: Corporate Team Building, ACME style. ago
Chapter 17: Bludgeon Brew presents "We had it all wrong." ago
Chapter 18: A knock on the Door. ago
Chapter 19: Loot! ago
Chapter 20: Prelude to Chaos ago
Chapter 21: Cabers in the dark. ago
Chapter 22: Lost and Found ago
Chapter 23: Road to Ruin ago
Chapter 24: "The first thing to understand....." ago
Chapter 25: Life was good today. ago
Chapter 26: Night at the tavern ago
Chapter 27: Late Night at the Tavern ago
Chapter 28: Dark Currents ago
Chapter 29: Earn the Light ago
Chapter 30: Meat ago
Chapter 31: Have we talked to you about your extended warranty? ago
Chapter 32: Drunken mornings and busy afternoons. ago
Chapter 33: Teaching ago
Chapter 34: Barbeque and Loot ago
Chapter 35: Naps and Rats ago
Chapter 36: Dungeon! part 1 ago
Chapter 37: Dungeon part 2 ago
Chapter 38: Drinking and Dowries ago
Chapter 39: Adventures in bartending. ago
Chapter 40: Negotiations ago
Chapter 41: Sir Timothy's Big Adventure ago
Chapter 42: Do try to keep up. ago
Chapter 43: Back in the saddle ago
Chapter 44: Welcome Home ago
Chapter 45: Bacon? ago
Chapter 46: Problems ago
Chapter 47: New hats and lost satchels. ago
Chapter 48: Harmony ago
Chapter 49: New friends. ago
Chapter 50: Learning to Ride ago
Chapter 51: A dark and stormy night ago
Chapter 52: One on the way ago
Chapter 53: Partings ago
Chapter 54: Mixing it up ago
Chapter 55: The Price of Tomatoes ago
Chapter 56: Hot and Sweet ago
Chapter 57: Weeds ago
Chapter 58: Awakening ago
Chapter 59: War and Pieces ago
Chapter 60: Back on his feet. ago
Chapter 61: Slow day ago
Chapter 62: Options ago
Chapter 63: Designing for Dungeoning ago
Chapter 64: Cheese? ago
Chapter 64.1 Falconer ago
Chapter 64.2: The General ago
Chapter 65: Dungeons Dark and not-so-Perilous ago

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Crakednut69
Overall

An interesting take on a commonly used setting

Reviewed at: Chapter 10: Small Talk

Style

I have seen a lot of stories with the game lit rpg system and world but this one stands out quite a bit with its detailed system and characters, problems that many lit rpgs face and makes me lose interest. The world building is really well done and it's easy to imagine the world and the characters.

Characters 

From what I've read all the characters feels realistic and has some essence to them and are introduced properly.

Grammar- I haven't spotted much grammar mistakes but the length of the paras used could definitely be shortened as reading long paras can be exhausting.

Overall I feel like this is a well written book with amazing world building and life like characters. I feel like there is a lot of ways this book could branch out and this is definitely a story you check especially if you're a fan of lit rpgs.....

 

scost
Overall
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Adventures in a corporatized VRMMO

Reviewed at: Chapter 11: Whiskey Run

This is a really interesting take on the VRMMO genre that has a unique focus on corporatization. The background and world building are especially interesting and well implemented. 

The style is probably the strongest element early on. The first few chapters have wonderful framing devices in both the character dialogue introducing the plot and excerpts from in-world documents that introduce the history. Once the story progresses to inside the game, the style becomes a little shakier, but totally servicable. The key problem being a tendancy to head-hop a little, especially when characters with distinctive voices enter the scene (Billy). Similar to this, perspectives shift without proper signposting and could benefit from paragraph breaks to signal different locations or viewpoints. Apart from this, the story is delivered in a tone that works great with the narrative but also has some levity to it.

The grammar is almost totally without issue. the only problems were slight mistakes in dialogue punctuation - but who even cares about that?

The story has an interesting set up in the corporatized VRMMO. The main actions of the story seem to be fairly standard for the genre, with a focus on characters levelling up and uncovering secrets in the game system. The structure of the corporate controlled village is very interesting though and gives the story and great structure.

The characters are currently serviceable but without exceptionally distinct voices. Billy, the manager of the village, has the most distinct character and makes his scenes much more engaging. I would like to see a bit more of a distinct voice and character from the main cast. But at the same time, they are totally servicable.

Overall, a pretty cool story with a really engageing setup and places to go.

TripleSeven
Overall
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General:4.5
Now let me explain the metaphor. The story starts of slow, real slow. You hear the engine chugging along but could barely sense the train moving. The engine is fine, but the reason it’s going slow is that it's fully loaded with things you need as you go along.
Style: 4
With the heavy emphasis of world building on the earlier chapters, it leaves very little space for flowery words and even sometimes fall into overexplanation. It’s not common, but it happens.
Grammar: 4.5
Grammar is fine, I haven’t found sentences that makes me want to reread it but the structuring of the paragraphs could use a little work. It affects the readability of the chapters, but a bit of editing work could fix the issue easily.
Story: 4.5
The story leans on the front loading of a lot of world building elements. Later on, it becomes its strengths as you have an established understanding of the events and doesn’t make any fortuitous event happening to the characters to look like an asspull.
Character score: 4
The story utilizes multiple POVs which affect the development of the characters. What it trades for is a better view of what is happening in the story, the motivations of the characters of why they do the things they do, and a better expectation of what they are going to do next.

In general, if you're the kind of reader that loves worldbuilding and how systems work, this will fit right into your alley. 

TurtleKing
Overall
Style
Story
Grammar
Character

Overall Score - I think this is a litrpg that is really well done, or at least really well done to the part of the story I have read. It goes into detail, building a magnificent game world, that really makes the reader want to immerse themselves in the writing. 

Style Score - I'm partial to stories that are inside a game world; I think that these types of settings lead to interesting stories if the author doesn't neglect the characters in his story. The author of this writing certainly didn't neglect the characters in this story. 

Character Score - The characters in this story are realistic, each portraying their own emotions. The main character is likable and someone you want to root for. for the portion of the story I've read. He makes seemingly smart / realistic decisions involving the game. 

Grammar- I found nothing wrong with the grammar. The story is slower paced, but in a way that is interesting and doesn't feel like it is dragging along. The prose is varied and there aren't any misspellings. 

Story Score - The story is well fleshed out to the point where I read. Everything seems planned and intentional. Nothing stood out to me as weird or improper planning. The author definitely takes time to make sure his story is engaging and entertaining to read. 

 

 

MalevolenceMau
Overall
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Story
Grammar
Character

Corporations, wage slaves, and a big old virtual reality to play within. The Butcher of Gadobhra is an interesting take on the genre with plenty of comedic throwbacks to other series dotted about the story.

Style: The story swaps perspective often, with a cluster of different characters to follow within a similar setting. It can get confusing at points and a bit much to keep track of, but is able to keep the flow well enough between changes. The use of tables brightens up the text, however, they do feel overused at some points especially when it lists out rewards of 10 or so separate tables.

The author notes are used, though less as the story progresses, to give other information like company layouts, background information, or emails. This can feel really out of place, and could be a major detriment as I know several readers who do not read these, thankfully the information isn’t overly crucial but is still a valued addition to the story.

Story: Following several characters, the story is mostly setup to follow several individuals as they work through a virtual reality world. Focus is put onto encounters, quests, as well as the progression from both. There is a lot of world building that encapsulates the story, though a good portion is front loaded or left to the author notes. With a slower pace than most stories we get to know the characters and situations a lot better, the pet system getting a good section of the story dedicated to it.

The use of real-world and other media naming conventions or even the actual names can bring me out of the immersion at times, leading the story to feeling like a comedy or satire. The fiction is noted as a comedy, so this is probably well placed, but it isn’t something I personally am fond of. At least the comedy isn’t forced down our throats, but it pops up quite often.

Grammar: There are a few missing punctuation marks around, letters that need to be capitalized, names changing their uppercase, etc. A few misplaced or missing words are also prevalent on the story. A lot of the time the grammar doesn’t take me out of the story, but I am very analytical when it comes to these kinds of things, so I feel the general reader would not find any issues.

Character: As there are plenty of characters I would have thought they would feel underdeveloped, though with the number of chapters it doesn’t feel like that. Each character gets their time to shine and to become dull. Some do feel more important than others, possibly pointing to the true MCs, but generally each individual has a good representation. I did miss a few aesthetic descriptions at times though.

Overall, the fiction is well-made with a lot of moving cogs in the machine. The overload of information could be off-putting to some readers, especially those who read many stories at once since you have to remember quite a bit.

Archsage
Overall
Style
Story
Grammar
Character

Style :- Classical third person style. When reading a fantasy/litrpg novels, it's so much better reading from the third person point of view. As readers, we are made to experience the feelings and actions of the various characters in a good way. I believe the author's is able to pull this off beautifully. 

Story :- This is a fantasy/litrpg novel which was set in the dystopian future. I love fantasy/rpg novels. The story is well written and planned by the author. Right from the synopsis, the readers can already see the basis of the storyline which is captivating. Once the readers start to read, they'll find it difficult to stop. The author is doing a good work on this aspect.

Grammar :- Excellent use of the grammar. From what I've read so far, there was no noticeable error that could affect the flow of the story. It showed the great effort the author is putting into his work. Highly commendable. 

Character :- The characters are the life of any novel. Everything about the characters,  from the personalities to dialogues, determine the beauty of a novel. The author has created well designed and planned characters that have life to the novel. I'm giving kudos to the author for a job well done,

Underload
Overall
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Character

I'm waiting for the tide

Reviewed at: Chapter 19: Loot!

I'll change the review once I've read further.

So where to begin... Ah, yes. Let's begin with Wally, the artificial intelligence. The smartest, the fastest, the most advanced, and loneliest being on the planet. He knows all. he sees all. And he listens to you. But he's too busy. He's overburdened and grieving for his lost brothers, the artificial intelligence who didn't survive. 

This story is his plan to bring them back. He's the true butcher of Gadobhra. I believe.

Let's start with the review:

The importance of style depends upon the story foretold, but it should and foremost be entertaining. Style is easier to grasp, but the hardest of the four categories to master. How well the style is received depends not upon the words used and information crammed between the dialogues, but upon the narrator and his ability to awe a reader.

The style of this story is flawed in this sense since it tries too be grand, rather than be entertaining. We are welcomed with a rather normally written first chapter, but what follows are the not so entertaining stage performances between characters whose importance to the story is as fleeting as the information they provide. 

The style of the normal chapters is as fine as chicken dinner, but the author's idea to go grand with it breaks the pace of the story, and that is just a tragedy. 

I have given 4 stars to the story because of things I've perceived and plot seen. I had difficulty understanding who the real protagonists of the story were, plural because there is never only one character on screen, which is a great thing by the way. 
However, everything is not great with the plot and how it's told. I believe, the central idea of a game world needing human forces to act as NPC's should have been better explored, because it feels half-baked at the moment. I had to ignore it to read the story, which made me quite sad, to be honest. 

To think such hardworking people had no place in the real world was a bitter pill for me to swallow. It's a novel idea in general, and I liked that author put it right in the center of the story by giving the players and the NPCs an empty world to grow and reign. The human-controlled Npc's would certainly have plenty of growth potential in terms of personal status in the game, and their influence in the real world.

Overall, the story, or the plot definitely has more potential than most rrl works, but the one thing that might keep it from real growth is the pace at which it opens the world. 

Alaqi
Overall
Style
Story
Grammar
Character

A Nice Mixture I Rarely See

Reviewed at: Chapter 7: A lot of Bull

This is a rare story including both the modern times, VRMMO, and adventuring/medieval times. There is much promise here because there is a lot to work with. It's a blank world like the author said. I loved the dynamics in the first chapter, but it kind of died out in the few next ones.

Story: It is well built, the change between characters is signaled and well made. You don't continue to think 'what happened to the other guy' and lose what is important on the current side of the story.

Style: I love how the author makes the dialogues and gives descriptions. They are extremely good to see and don't make you bored. They actively pull the readers towards specific parts that better increase the understanding of how this new world functions. For now, it is at a slow pace, but that can probably change as the MCs evolve.

Grammar: Since I am not a native English speaker, I couldn't notice any relevant mistakes. Only a lack of Capital letters in the first chapter, but that only happened then and there and I have yet to see any other flaw or something in need of correction.

Characters: I loved the first two relevant characters: Ozzy and Billy. They bring a nice change to what I am used to and manage to surprise me with how they act. The side characters don't look like they are there just to fill up the story. They don't sound mechanic or unnatural which helps with the general flow of the story.

Overall, this is a fiction with a lot of potential, where anything can happen and you would not be surprised, but rather pleased. It makes for a nice combination of genres which is rare here on RR

Ayer12
Overall
Style
Story
Grammar
Character

Overall, it's quite the interesting read if you're willing to invest the time to really get to know the setting that the author is going for. It's a unique take on the virtual reality genre, as in players are needed to act as NPC's and the implications of that.

Style: very interesting style of worldbuilding and plot progression. The characters are introduced in a unique way, while also setting up the plot and keeping everything grounded. Some of the worldbuilding is also done by interviews and conversations between other characters, which is actually a lot more interesting than it sounds.

Grammar: Some minor typos here and there (like tonite instead of tonight) but nothing egregious or that would seriously take away from the story.

Story: This is the good part. The story follows a crew of characters who work as these "player NPC's" and their lives. In a rather dystopian future where the "VR future" has fallen on its head, their lives of contracted works contrast greatly with their desires and dreams. It's a good read indeed

Characters: The characters are introduced very early on and quite well. The main cast feels like real people, though their personality can be a little unclear at times, but so can real people's.

Long story short, solid recommendation!

Sea_chelle
Overall

Strong World Building and Full of Wit

Reviewed at: Chapter 11: Whiskey Run

The first thing that jumped out at me about the Butcher of Gadobhra, is the witty writing style the author has. The descriptions were clever, humorous, and made for an entertaining read. This story contains through world building, and the futuristic world feels both intriguing and believable. There is a lot of information to take in at the beginning of the story, but this information is delivered in unique ways, and adds important background to later events. The plot has a good amount of suspense, and I can’t help but wonder more about the happenings about greedy corporations, the last AI, and how the story will continue to progress. The more I read the more I found myself immersed in the story.

If you like strong worldbuilding, clever writing, and a sinister plot, I highly recommend you give this a read!