The Eager Dimension Hopper (SCP)

by Hurdle

Warning This fiction contains:
  • Gore
  • Profanity
  • Traumatising content

SCP 507 didn't utilize his abilities properly, that's what got him killed. Let's see if someone with ambition does any better. 

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AN: Updates will happen periodically . I don't have a set release schedule, but new chapters will come out frequently. I'm also fairly new to writing stories, so I appreciate any creative criticism. I'm also posting to Scribblehub under the same name. Thanks for reading!

Source Material: http://www.scpwiki.com/scp-507

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  • Story Score
  • Grammar Score
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Hurdle

Hurdle

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SamStrike
Overall
Style
Story
Grammar
Character

Style is good, no problem there. Paragraph are not too long and are easy to read. 

Story, as an SCP story I guess you may have an idea of what you are going to read, there also seem to be a big background behind the scene that the author is trying to set up, look forward to that. The MC seem to have some plot armor. Some of the story assume that you already know about SCPs, which not every reader may know, I feel like there should be a bit more explanation in those.

Grammar is fine, but there are some errors at times, like words repeating and some weird sentence structure, but rarely.

Characters... this is the problem.. The MC get reincarnated in a new body, and his reaction is completely null, he accepts it like it's nothing, he doesn't even question it, as if being reincarnated is an average situation. He doesn't even seem to care about his previous life at all. He get sended to another dimension after 1-2 week and he doesn't seem to feel any emotions, it's like if he was strolling on a park nonchalantly, also, he can apparently easily adapt to life death situations like it's nothing, and remember that he was a normal guy before. Even when he killed a human, when he probably never killed anything before, he did it as if he was killing a mosquito, he didn't show any trace of emotions; every action of his feels like is made by an emotionless AI. There aren't many characters as of now, but they don't seem to have much of a personality, they seem to act like robots without emotions, including the main character. Overall, I am also not very happy with how the MC is turning out, he is an antihero, but not the interesting type, the douche kind.

 

Still, the story is not bad and fairly interesting, I will keep reading and see.

Osamaru Ta
Overall
Style
Story
Grammar
Character

All right story, but made with the Fan in mind.

Reviewed at: Chapter 23

If you are a fan of SCP Stories, you'll enjoy this one. Its a Fun little romp into the SCP world with an intreseting twist.

THAT BEING SAID! Story wise, I'd probably only give it maybe a 7/10.

Fun, but not Groundbreaking.

You can tell that it was written for the SCP fan in mind, and it assumes as much, as we're basicly thrown right into the mix without really much setup or explanation for anything.

The MC in particular seems extremely undisturbed by his entire situation, to the point that its very likly he either has some kind of mental condition, or the Crown he is wearing is somehow affecting his mental state.

That doesn't make it BAD, per-say, only one of those stories you have to suspend your disbelief at first.

I expect the Author will explain why he's like that later in the story, but if that kind of thing turns you off, you might not last long enough to figure out WHY.

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BoopDaSnoot
Overall

Awesome story, playing with SCP lore, giving the MC chances to power up. 

Zero character development. The MC feels like robocop with how little emotion he has. He went full rambo since chapter 1, feeling not a bit disturbed, confused or scared upon waking up in a different body inside a facility belongs to an ominous organisation.

Need to seperate inner thought, or at least indicate the MC's having inner monologues, from normal story telling. Currently, author changing from first person to third person randomly when MC's thinking without any hint.

So, if you ignore all the above flaws, I suppose this is a nice story. 

 

 

 

TheMineKeeper
Overall
Style
Story
Grammar
Character

Incredibly enjoyable, Excellent take on SCP

Reviewed at: Chapter 16

So, I've been a fan of the various SCP universes for a long time, and 507 has always stricken me as one of the SCP's with the most potential for story.

Up until now, the story has been very interesting, with a slice-of-life (or rather slice-of-shift) esque feel interspersed with nuggets of information in regards to what happened/will happen to our main character. That leads to the 5 stars in story.

Style is good for me, I usually have problems focusing if the paragraphs are too long, or the story is just straight up a wall of text. This is not the case for this story. Max points of style because it's the perfect one for me.

Grammar is on point, I haven't seen any errors.

Now, Character score. I'm honestly unsure of whether or not it is the right choice to give it a lower score. On one hand, I feel like it's a bit repetitive how the MC keeps reiterating that the foundation shouldn't fuck with him. But on the other hand, he also is someone from outside the foundation, who has access to all kinds of information on how they fucked over other SCP's. So I'm very torn on what character score to give.

 

Overall, while I don't necessarily like how brash the MC is, the story in general is both interesting and enjoyable. I definitely recommend giving this a read if you're a fan of the SCP universe(s)

Vitaly S Alexius
Overall
Style
Story
Grammar
Character

A rational scp? Why I never!

Reviewed at: Chapter 21

Here I thought I could try out this SCP tale of interest. This story is smooth and wonderful and it explores the world of the scp with a protagonist who's actually clever and rational and caring [ which is the problem with most scps - they're one track mind monsters or idiots.]

Here we have a man who's soul gets stuck in SCP 507, so he uses it to his fullest advantage to hop across universes, meet with other SCPs, interact with them and fight them, etc. A whole big bucket of opportunity, basically!

Grammar wise the story jumps from past to present tense for no reason, that's why grammar is at 2/5, but if I ignore that the catchyness of the protagonist and the whimsy of the scps digs into my soul.

Main character is just a nice guy who wants to see the multiverse. He helps out people suffering under other SCPs, which is really wholesome and swell. Through his eyes we get to experience the flesh that hates and the infinite ikea among others.

Seriously, the SCP wiki is a huge potential for exploration - it provides a backbone for this story to ride and a lot of power for the main character to harvest as he takes control of anomalies as means of survival.

Totally putting this boy on my reading list and eagerly awaiting more chapters!

uiytt
Overall
Style
Story
Grammar
Character

Original use of SCPs

Reviewed at: Chapter 25

Well I didn't think I would enjoy it as much as I did. It starts a bit meh but certainly gets better as chapters go.

Grammar :

Well I'm not english so I can't really tell. Seemed fine for me

Story :

This is the interesting part. Of course the scp universe is interesting but the author includes his own plot and really add his own touch with theory and custom takes on some scps. They feel good and plausible so it's really enjoyable.

We get new interesting scps interaction and we see how the mc deal with them.

 

The MC does tend to get op quite quickly, it's still fine because we're in the scp universe but I'm a bit afraid he just go too powerful and it's just start getting boring (but it's not the case currently).

SCP is supposed to be a bit of a horror universe, and since he is quite op, we don't get that anymore.

Anyway the story is very enjoyable.

Style :

Ok, this is a rough part. Everything just go very quickly, the author spend almost no time on a situation, we have little input on where the MC is, how he feels, whats around him, etc..

On top of that the transition are quite bad, they're just "----------------------------". They really disconnect us from the story. They could be easily replaced or even totally removed sometimes.

Character :

I think that this is the worst part of the story for me. At the beginning we don't have any information about him, who he is, what he likes, who does he know, what are his goals, etc... He is just blank

It doesn't go better as the story advance, he just want to improve himself but he doesn't have much of a personality.

And the rare time he has one, it's always changing to suit the plot. He goes from I must save everyone to It's okay to kill innocents.

When we read the story, we just don't believe that he is real.

 

World Building :

Well I'm adding this part since the world plays a big part in this story.

First of all, this story is not for people who don't know anything about the scp foundation. Almost nothing is explained.

However, for people who already know the world, it's a great way to learn about new scps since the author present quite the bit of them and they are not always the most famous one.

What I really appreciate is that the author create new information on scps to make the plot progress or make them more intersting. The additional information are good, believable and intersting ! So a big +1 for me.

As for the SCP-Foundation itself, their decision are logical, for me they seem a bit bolder than the original one, but we still recognise the SCP-foundation.

FlaireBurst
Overall

Nice, Really Nice

Reviewed at: Chapter 26

For starters, I've never given any reviews on novels, at least not with descriptions, so do forgive me if you find this review lacking.

Well, this novel is exactly what I've been looking for, an SCP fan fiction with a little power fantasy sprinkled on it. Of course, there are other SCP fanfics out there but this one matches my taste to perfection, especially since the MC is not an utter psychopath unlike the other popular SCP fanfic (you know which one I'm talking about). The premise is simple, a random dude possessed the dead body of SCP-507 and decided to be pro-active and have fun with his powers. The world-building is nice, mainly because it's an SCP fanfic so there are a LOT of mysteries that're waiting to be solved (mainly those that involve the MC and his powers) and a LOT of SCPs to tackle. In essence it's simple and there's beauty in simplicity. So yeah 10/10 will binge-read again.

AliceHealer
Overall

Dimension hopper survival guide.

Reviewed at: Chapter 10

This is another one of those stories I call "portal tier". Not a perfect story, but perfect in what its trying to do. This an action story first, then an adventure, then a mystery and then an scp story. Expect the super smart scp foundation to be a bit less invincible. The main character is set with some reasonably strong plot armour to survive dealing with the cool environments and mc is way more informed, armed and level headed than what seems reasonable for the scp foundation.

But at its core its a damn good story with a great idea and alot of fun to be had.

It sounds like I'm ragging on it but this is a case of "don't play fallout if your only here for the shooting". Scp wiki is a horror/supernatural/mystery genre. This story is an action/adventure/mystery. It's great you'll love it trust me

Sansblueye64
Overall

good story but random tense shifts are physically painful to read. it jsut switches between "micheal" and "i" at the drop of a hat for no good reason (though you should still read because its a good story)  (buffing wordcount time) w w w w w w w w w w w w w w w w w w w w w w w w w w w w 

 

PaulTB
Overall

Okay start, gets worse.

Reviewed at: Chapter 19

Grammar and editing mistakes are common. There are at least a few every chapter.

Style - Early on the author tended to PoV switches in the middle of chapters, which wasn't fun.

Character - the MC seems to be pretty much a sociopath, or just badly written. Possibly both.

Story - it starts pretty readable, but gets worse. The MC has some major power creep. The SCP foundation behaves in a really naive way. Although he is 'dimension hopping' it mostly ends up with him 'randomly' arriving in a dimension / location dominated by one of the SCPs the foundation has encountered.