It looked like Little Tao actually had sleep cycles to recover her energy now, so she slept with Luo Fei.
Even though I've been making sure not to touch her weirdly, I really wanted to tap that ass...!
This was the best opportunity!
I nonchalantly headed into her room with my head held high, causing her to glare straight at me.
"Why are you here?"
"I just wanted to sleep next to my daughter. Is it wrong for a father to do so?" I hid my ulterior motives, but it seemed like they couldn't be hid on my face. What surprised me was her tranquility.
She didn't get angry or kick me out. There seemed to be a difference in her eyes while letting me in.
I silently walked into the room. What I'd been expecting was her to put Little Tao in between us to separate our bodies. However, she didn't immediately put the sleeping little girl in the centre.
"You can sleep on that side, or on this side. Pick what you like." Was this supposed to be a trap?
I could either put my back down on the right side of the bed, next to my daughter. Or... I could go on the left and sleep next to Luo Fei. The answer I'd give was obvious, so I didn't understand her at all.
"Left." But it wasn't like I'd give up here. She was inviting me, so I'm gonna accepting the invitation!
The ponytailed woman held my daughter closer to her chest as I put my back down behind her. She still seemed to be trembling a little, feeling the fear I'd given her from what happened some time ago.
There was a silence brewing between us, one that became harder to break as time went on. I didn't know what subject to bring up. A part of me also didn't want to scare her off by speaking abruptly.
It was after calming down did she break it herself:
"You've changed." This statement wasn't hard for me to figure out. I really did 'change' to others.
"..." Rather than throwing out a joke, I kept silent.
She didn't turn around. The indescribable mood between us was hard for me to break easily.
It was only after a good while did I answer:
"Is that why you chose to stay here?" It was just a guess, but she didn't outright deny my claim:
"You're the only person I saw change with my own eyes." She didn't know... that 'he' wasn't me.
That's why she could say she'd saw me change.
Perhaps she wanted to believe that I'd become different thanks to her. Everyone woman like that.
They liked to believe that they could change a man themselves. Even though no one truly changed.
Someone like 'Kang Hyuk' would never truly change. However, I was here right now.
Looking from her perspective, I guess it made some sense. She'd 'experienced' that Martial King.
The way he dragged her to the room, tied her to the bed, and attempted to take what was hers.
For her, the me of right now must seem crazy...
It was at this point that I wanted to make her forget that past. I wanted to put a new memory in her.
"Are you still doubtful?" When being asked this, it seemed like the answer was buried in her heart.
She didn't want to think about the answer.
"...I wish what you're showing me isn't some illusion I cooked up. Sometimes, I feel that maybe it's just me dreaming. Sometimes, it feels like the nightmares I'd been having are the reality."
"What do you see in those nightmares?" When I asked that, a cold chill went down her back from attempting to remember. She started stroking Little Tao's hair, trying to heal away the bad memories.
"You. I see you as the most evil man in the world. A man who snatched away my freedom, my pride, my everything, and someone who takes pleasure in hurting me." My sexual desires started fading.
"...Are you crying?"
"I'm not." She insisted, and from what I could tell after lifting my back to see her face... she wasn't.
The girl had her eyes shut firmly. There was no tear stains on the bed, but I could feel it from her mood.
Luo Fei was crying...
I wasn't sure how to stop her tears. She'd opened up about a part of her that she'd never tell others.
If I referred back to my Core Tenets of Love, then this act would fall into the aspect of 'Submission'.
It was different from merely giving up resistance or giving up your agency, the 'Submission' Tenet was a hard task for anyone because it required someone to open up their heart and lay it bare.
It was the complete opposite of my 'Domination' Tenet, where I'd simply to try understanding others.
It took great courage to bare one's heart to another individual, especially if one lacked trust for the partner. Still... 'True Love' required both Individuals to be able to lay themselves naked to each other.
This was a rare occurrence that might never happen again. A window of opportunity for me.
Just as it was immodest for a man to ask a woman to take off her clothes. Normally, having my partner's heart laid out before me usually took considerable time of seduction and temptation.
However, Luo Fei never fell for any of my tactics.
It wasn't that she was modest, but that she was the exact opposite type of woman from her younger sister. She didn't want for my initiative to soften her heart, and instead took off her defences boldly.
Though it was in-line with the 'Submission' Tenet I was religiously following, it was much more bolder.
Like she was taking her clothes off and saying to have my way with her. A choice of her own...
How was I to respond to her feelings?
Perhaps it would be the more gentlemanly thing to also show 'Submission' and open up, but this bed wasn't a confessional. There could only be one submissive in the bed at a time, not two.
It was best to show understanding of her rather than ignoring what she'd came out to tell me.
However, even if she took the position of submission in bed, I couldn't just be 'dominant'.
It wasn't enough to just understand her. She didn't want me to take her 'power' despite giving it up.
Her nightmares all related to my dominant attitude.
That's why, it was better to take a different approach. Maybe 'Transaction' or 'Devotion'...
Since she would probably find the latter to weigh too heavily on her, I decided to pick the former.
"Can I touch you?" I asked, giving her full reign without ACTUALLY giving her total freedom.
She could choose when I'd touch, but she had no way of knowing where or how I'd draw closer.
"...Go ahead." She answered with hesitation.
Rather than diving into her and rubbing her body like a barbarian, I took a thoughtful approach.
I didn't hide my movements while getting off the bed. She likely felt scared when I did this.
However, it wasn't like I could touch her the right way from where my body was currently positioned.
That's why I went to the right side of the bed.
She kept her eyes closed tightly. I knew from experience that this was her way of rejecting me.
Her mouth may have given approval, but the essence of 'Transaction' was a true interaction.
It wasn't just give and take, it was communicating with the body. That's why... I touched her cheek.
I'd leaned over Little Tao and stroked her face like I was giving comfort, causing her to open her eyes.
She finally let go of my daughter, then looked at me with pain and a complicated feelings of trust.
I knew she couldn't understand my intentions.
But this much was fine. Just as one didn't scream at another person like a child, communication took listening to the partner on top of speaking. That's why my eyes waited for her to show movement.
When she lightly moved her head, I let go of her cheek, allowing her to move freely on the bed.
She put Little Tao at the centre of the bed and got up as well. It didn't seem like laying down was comfortable... This was likely because the bed reminded her of her nightmares of 'Kang Hyuk'.
After putting the covers over my daughter, she got up and grabbed my wrist. She let Little Tao sleep.
I wasn't sure where she was taking me until my eyes saw the entrance of my own room. That's when my heart understood her actions. She was going back to where everything had began...
"This is the place my Heart Demon shows me whenever I try to relax. So... dye this place in a different colour. Make me forget the pains you've inflicted on me." She said while pointing at the bed.
Her heart wasn't calm. She seemed ready to strip off her clothes and throw herself onto the bed, but I stopped her. Even if she said that, there was no way she'd be healed by some knockoff 'sex scene'.
"Luo Fei." I called out her name, which was when she'd finally showed a beautiful face full of tears.
I couldn't stop her crying, nor wipe them away.
It was only when we finally reached this point that I'd realised that making her stop crying was wrong.
After going through such torment, it was only natural that she'd cry. Her heart was scarred...
Perhaps showing her the opposite scene of that night would feel good personally, but I knew she wouldn't be able to 'dye' that scene if I'd done it that way. Her nightmares would still linger.
It was like how mixing the colour black with white didn't completely erase the darkness. It just made that dark colour less prominent, thus creating the colour of grey. It wasn't a good way to atone...
No, what would be better is creating a brand new colour from old ones. Like how mixing red and yellow would create orange. That way, the haunting memories of that night wouldn't bother ever again.
I turned her towards me, looking into those cloudy eyes that seemed filled with nothing but despair.
Then I whispered into her ears amorously:
"You haven't forgotten about my 'potency', have you?" A light appeared in her eyes as she took a step away from me, which was coincidently also the direction of the bed. Looks like she really did...
There was a fearful look on her face as she was about to change her mind, but I stopped her.
"Let go." She begged after I grabbed her wrist.
Perhaps it would be more honourable if I let her go now, but nothing would change if she left.
I could stand seeing her hide the pain she'd been feeling after seeing her open up. It hurt me too.
"I won't do cum inside of you. That should fix the situation, or am I wrong?" She stopped struggling to leave, and looked at me with the eyes of someone too indecisive to make a decision.
"What if you're just lying to me?"
"Then I promise to give up my freedom and let you abuse me until you're satisfied." She finally stopped in her tracks. A strong darkness arose in her eyes as she probably imagined torturing me.
"Alright. Then let's make a deal."
"Good... Then let's set some ground rules." This kind of thing couldn't be rushed hastily.
"Yeah... First: The safe word will be 'Null'. Though since it's weird to expect you to remember it the first time, just speak loudly and I'll halt my actions for a few seconds. If we're going to dye that memory, then let's recreate some parts of it."
I spoke before leaving the room. When I came back, in my hands were items from that day.
A knife, a bundle of ropes (with some of them having been cut), a gag, and a familiar manual.
"We'll throw away the gag. That isn’t needed right now.” I threw that useless cloth to the side.
“So... will we start now?”
“Let’s practice saying ‘Null’ a few times, then set the scene. Don’t forget that word. Though I won’t blame you if forgetting in the ‘scene’.” I tapped on the bed, and she followed my gesture to sit there.
“What’s a ‘scene’ anyway?”
“I’ll be pretending to be that evil guy you see in your nightmares. This will be our ‘first meeting’.”
“So I’m not allowed to say your name?”
“If you can’t act, just project what happened that day. Remember to not be too loud if you don’t want anything to stop.” She nodded her head. It looked like she was going to take this ‘scene’ seriously.
Then, I started to practice the safe word with her using normal touches and some painful pinches.
It was also a way for me to get my mind used to teasing her sadistically. Since this ‘scene’ wasn’t something I was especially eager to act out. The time I spent in paying at Orchid Pavilion arose.
These ‘scenes’ were usually flat and empty, but tonight I’d be doing one with a clear purpose.
A part of me wished to steal her heart secretly...