Somebody Stop Her

by Vitaly S Alexius

In a world of villains and heroes, the Kilborne family moved to the small town of Saint Mary. Their new neighbors, living in the 1888 Saint Mary cathedral, turned out to be a family of supervillains. Martin Kilborne would find school perfectly mundane if it wasn't for Alexa Terranova who is: constantly bothering him with a pocket raygun, demanding he become her minion and threatening to blow up the principal's office in a series of unnecessarily complicated, wacky plots. 

The more Martin learns about Alexa, the more dangerous and insane his life becomes as he is dragged into terrible, misfortunate, no good adventures of doom.

A wholesome, slice of life, superhero / supervillain sci-fi comedy, sprinkled with elements of horror.
Participant in the Royal Road Writathon challenge - 55'555 words in 35 days!

Dedicated to my daugher who has an unbendable stubborn spirit and my friends at the Silver Pen server who motivated me to write new things!

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Vitaly S Alexius

Vitaly S Alexius

Archbishop of Captania and sovereign territories

Royal Writathon April 2021 winner
300 Review Upvotes
Word Count (12)
25 Reviews
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This really reminds me of Addams Family meets Rick and Morty.

You've got the story of a young superhero's son who meets a girl that seems like a quirky mad scientist at first, but also has a dark struggle that I feel propels the story to the next level. 

The strongest aspect of the story, though, has to be its humour. It's just a lot of fun to read about Martin and Alexa even when they're just talking.

I want to go into more detail, but I found the twists with in the novel really kept me going to I'd like for them to surprise you too. So I'll just stalk about the categories.

The story's still early in its chapters, but so far it's suited the tone well with a nice pacing and strcuture that I found drew me in. Due to the comedic tone, the story regularly goes into madcap hijinks which are then followed by some fairly grim moments. I found so far that was a nice balance. 

Style is good, with easy smooth reading, but I think the dialogue is where it really shines. To me the verbal fencing (oh who am I kidding, verbal 'one-sided beatdowns') between Alexa and Martin are the strongest aspects of style. 

Grammar is good and there's no mistakes I saw.

Finally, I love the characters. They function in a kind of 'saturday morning cartoon' fashion that I think works really well for the story. If you're looking for a story where every character is a deep study into the human condition, then this isn't the purpose. Some characters, like the teacher, are just there to be straight man to a joke. And that works well.

I think Somebody Stop Her is a lot of fun to read and wind down after a long day, with moments of macabre action and humour.

Give it a shot!


Somebody Stop Her is a very wholesome book and it’s wholesome because of the adorable personalities of its characters and their hilarious interactions. The heroes in this novel are kids and their entire future is ahead of them, however they find out that their world is doomed and so they must grow up, improve themselves and rapidly change to face the coming storm of all-consuming darkness that looms in the near future. It’s a quirky mixture of a kids book, a comic and a superhero tale and is giving me flashbacks to Pippi Longstocking, which is technically a book about a girl superhero who is stronger than everyone around her and has a lot of gold. In here, the role of Pippi is taken up by Alexa Terranova, a daughter of a supervillain who’s been forced to grow up too fast in the world of apocalyptic future into which she is forcefully flashed by her bracelet. 


Her two new best friends aka minions who don’t know it yet are: not yet-hero Mittens aka Martin Kilborne and equalizer Cottie aka Verse 24-19. The book gives a very distinctive feeling of “home”, because it portrays a sort of a childhood world where the power of the imagination of Alexa is the plot driver, her hijinks and intelligence is what takes her above others. Alexa uses her wits to take down one enemy after the other - the very first of her enemies being Martin who feels that he must destroy her simply because she is a villain. Alexa operates on the tropes of being a villain - she is a magician who uses sleight of hand to trick her enemies into submission. For example: she doesn’t actually have a million bombs, she only needs to pretend, to convince her enemies that she does to appear more powerful than she really is and once they fall in line she uses their obedience to further her plot and to trick others, etc. 


The treehouse made entirely from stolen signs harvested from the future is a fun concept, also adding to that feeling of “home” and reminds me of The Three Investigators series which I read when I was 10 while learning english, in which kids construct a clubhouse in a junkyard.


Grammar is good, so is spelling. Storytelling style is basic mostly with conversations of the mains, but it works quite nicely, especially since Vitaly S Alexius is planning to turn this work into a comic book according to his patreon and his other work has been going on for 10+ years now so I doubt that this new epic will hiatus anytime soon.


This book makes me laugh out loud on nearly every page, which is a rare feat.

There are loops within loops of unexpected twists in this masterpiece and I can’t wait till there is more to read!


The cunning fox plotter, a hen and a hunter.

Reviewed at: Chapter 18: The Admiral of nevermore

This book is a delight to my senses as a purveyor of reading. The characters definitely fall under existing tropes, but they ride those tropes in style becoming more and more exotic, twisted, catchy and lovable. Alexa is my favourite by far and reminds me of young Rick from Rick and Morty. She’s a brilliant, a tad misguided, lost, broken, sad girl who is keeping herself together through incredibly focused willpower. She wants nothing but to fix the world, but to do so she must grow up faster than the others and also stay sane while being thrown into a death grinder unlike no hero has ever faced or survived. She’s been dead what? A thousand times? She takes cunning to a whole new level. Do I feel like I’ve been socially hacked while reading this book, just like poor Mittens? 100% yes. Somebody Stop Her doesn’t stop for anyone - it’s a freight train without breaks that chugs off a cliff into hell, with demons trying to claw their way into the car windows, all while inside mad hatter and Alice are having tea!  There’s no stopping yourself once you start reading it, because oh boy does it get crazy and fun and exciting all at once, once Alexa rips the bags off Martin’s face and off the reader’s face as well with her insane hijinks and overly complex plots. She’s the kind of supervillain I simply love to read about - one that laughs a lot and makes long winded speeches, but she does it in such a way where it doesn’t feel forced, where that sort of an activity is just part of her character as a kid trying to laugh and explain things to clueless Martin.

My second favourite character is Martin. He’s the bedrock upon which Alexa concocts her symphony of a dance of madness. He’s the hen to her fox, the watson to her sherlock, the morty to her rick, etc. Basically without Martin this book would make no sense and would just be Alexa acting nuts for no reason. He’s not even described in any of the chapters, so I am guessing he represents the reader self-insert, a normal person in a mad mad world of Alexa into the shoes of which anyone could put themselves in while reading this book.

Cottie has a wicked cool gun. I do like how she acts as the human balance between heroes and villains. Cottie has no powers except for her gun as I understand it so far, she is the human standing between Martin [hero] and Alexa [villain], trying to be strong and emotionless like spock, but often failing due to Alexa’s constant harassment.

Ember is an ass and I hate her, thanks. I didn't think Alexa would minion her too,  God why??

Writing style, spelling and etc is overall legit. 
In conclusion : Bitching story, keep it up, authorsama, more power to you!


Seven Deadly Sins in 3AM!😂😪😰😱🙊👈

Reviewed at: Chapter 30: The train of thought with no breaks

Seven Deadly Sins is a hack and slash story made by Microsoft, In this story, you will meet the 21 main members of Seven Deadly Sins, Making the story more sinful than adding pineapple on a pizza, and I know you readers have waited for so long for me to introduce you to this wonderful poem and be warned you might not believe the information given by me in this review, if so please write an angry post in Twitter so that I can send it to the federal reserve of Pork island, so buckle up your donuts and tea because this will be Bri'ish.


In this story you follow Martin, a half Mexican and half Italian, this gives him the privilege to put pizza on tacos, And next is Alexa, The mastermind behind Jeff Bezos success in selling Amazon Prime and she also knows as Amazon Alexa from Game of throne, Next is Cottie known as my waifu, She is the most waifu material and the best waifu, did I tell you that she is my waif-, Next is okay... I guess, Next is Spider Bro, best bro you will have, if you are planning to get one I would 100% recomened it, Next is another spider....I forgot her name so let's get to the next category


If you have never read a story from this author before, you will be on a treat.....what I mean is like you taking LSD while reading the story, it makes sense in a way but it also doesn't, you might say this is not your cup of coffee because learning about mind bending mechanism of Quantum Psycoroporial Evaporation is too much for your smooth brain, But I will say back that you should stop drinking coffee and start drinking tea, and it's not Quantum Mechanics its Psycorpiral Mechanics, the story plot is soo deep it will take you deeper than you ever have been before😰......anyway I'm just saying you should give this story a try, If not I will drink 1 liter of water in one drink so try me! 


So the conclusion is 5 out of 5 story with great characters, with an amazing plot, so you should read it, this is not an option, because this is the only option, if you dont read it....You know whats going to happened👀


It's so lovely to see wonderfully developed characters with complex histories in a world with many mysteries. The story is immersive and pulls you into the world of... super-ish heros? Apocalyptic futures? Icky inky monsters?
I cannot do it justice by describing it in a few phrases but it's such a good read, please do read it if you're on the fence. 

Side note: I also enjoy the references of our favorite traffic light from RA. ^^


This reminds me of Vigor Mortis. Great!

Reviewed at: Chapter 9: The puppeteer and the paladin

What does it take to please me as a reader?

Be a little weird. Be a little audacious. Grab me by the hand, guide me into your world, then throw me off a cliff where I fall in headfirst and I'm not going to ask for a parachute. That's the feeling I got when I was reading another smash hit called Vigor Mortis. And from what I'm seeing here, I can already tell this is going to be another smash hit for being so freaking fun!

It's a little dark. It's rather blunt and in your face with certain dark subjects. But the earnest goodness of our "Watson-like" character--Martin--mingling with the madcap, mad-genius, weirdo of a Sherlock--Alexa--who you'll want to doubt because she acts super crazy, and seems unreliable, but turns out to be highly reliable in the most unique and heartfelt ways. 

The writing isn't perfect, but it still rates highly for quickly telling me what I need to know in a way that allows me to understand it and move the story forward. I'm sure there are plenty of better writers, but sometimes those writers use too many words to say simple things. Or they fixate on grammar so much that they come across as either dry or purple. The author does well enough to get the message across and in RR, that works!

In the end, all I can tell you is this story is dark, fun, and weird. I want more of this story.


Heh, Terranova... the name seems familiar!
Great job as always, Alexius!
I just like the villain aesthetics the neightbours have, the descriptions, the humor...
It is so amazing, and i do not know why... 
But yet every book you write makes me amazed, it has it's own eldritch sci-fi aesthetics which brings a smile to my face, anyways, good luck on writing the book!

Origin, The Creator

First and foremost: Can't stop, won't stop! This story has blown me away to the point that I've sacrificed the limited and precious sleep I've available to me. At first, I couldn't stop. Then, I wouldn't, just as Alexa refuses to be stopped.

Disclaimer: I don't usually read superhero stories, but that didn't matter in this instance. 

Style: This puts me to shame. Seamlessly done, the characters come alive fluidly and stay consistent throughout the entirety of the story. There are so many things that set this way above other stories.

Story: Wowzers. Give me more, more, moooore! The sequence of events, the revelations, the way everything ties in so flawlessly... Read it.

Grammar: If there was anything I'd take a point or two off for, it'd be this. However, the author bends the rules of grammar in a way that compliments their style.

Character: Alexa is loveable. Her energy, her struggle, her chaos, her deep planning, her constant pop culture references. I want her to succeed on her mission, despite her so-called proclamation of villainy. I want her to be happy. I love her chaotic relation with all the other characters, especially Cottie. I want to see more of literally everyone and everything.

So, as I first said: Can't stop, won't stop.

I can't stop reading. I won't stop reading. I'm gonna be shirking my own Writathalon anytime this story notifies me of a new update. That much I promise. 


Overall, a nice rollercoaster romp that feels like the breaks have been cut and the person who cut them is in the coaster car with you, screaming in delight.

I was expecting something like the standard YA fare of "My neighbor is a super villain" "I am a super hero", but got a fun little romp instead.

And honestly, the use of the "death ray" to kill a social life just slays me. 


Style: It's a decent writing style. Third person limited omniscient with the camera focused on the POV character. 

Story: A neat spin on teenage super heroes and villains, which is fun. The MC gets recruited as his nieghbors minion.

Grammar: I haven't noticed any issues, so if there are problems in this metric I have yet to stumble across them.

Character: Well developed thus far. I don't want to say more for fear of spoilers, but there's a method and reason to the madness.

Otters: This story lacks otters, and thus I am forced to deduct the sixth star. However I was bribed to make an advanced review for the appearance of a million otters, so we'll see if this changes.

Hmm. Advanced reviews must be at least two hundred words long, but it also doesnt tell me how many I have used so far, and for some reason copy and paste doesn't want to work so I can not check it against other sites. 


A story worth reading for hijinks and horror!

Reviewed at: Chapter 6: The guest from the future

      This story is captivating; the characters pull you in. Their eccentricities and quirks make them relatable in a way few characters are. The story isn’t overly obtuse in its prose, the dialogue in the first chapter was rough to adjust to, but as the story goes on the narration and comedic timing becomes amazing. Like I said the comedic timing is great, the small bits of meta-humor perfectly blend in, and the dialogue perfectly captures this. The pacing continuously ramps up through the story, the drama builds, every moving piece feels like it's converging, and the end of the current chapter (chapter 6) has me on the edge of my seat.  
    The story starts slow, letting the characters build, and then drops you in the deep end. The story starts rolling and the horror builds with it. The setting is amazing and there are so many hints at greater world-building. I personally love when more and more pieces of the story start moving in the background. Everything starts coming together. And the breaking point seems to always be coming.
    The dialogue does start a little rough, some exposition isn’t the best, but the characters quickly shine. The two main characters have great chemistry and the dialogue is super fun to read. Just how the dialogue builds and grows so does the pacing. It is honestly a roller coaster. I hope you give it a try. 

    The grammar had a couple of things I took note of to send to the author, but contrary to what I usually expect the story grows better. The sentences get tighter, the grammar gets better, and there are no typos I noticed later on. Some dialogue does go back and forth very quickly with little character description. Nothing too distracting. 

    The main character Martin is a bit of a White Knight, he has no powers or special abilities, but his personality really does shine. I love his quirks and his motivations. His chemistry and relationship with Alexa the secondary main character, is a highlight of the story. Alexa is a villain and a victim. Her personality is fun and her dialogue is great. Side characters don’t get fleshed out much, some of their dialogue feels weird compared to the great chemistry the main characters have, and it’s unclear for some of the characters how much involvement they have with heroes and if they have powers.  
    Overall the comedy and chemistry shine through the story making it an amazing read. The horror slowly builds and grows. The mixture is shocking, making me fear for the characters, and leaving me at the edge of my seat when she goes Lovecraftian. I don’t compare things to Lovecraft often. But the vibes I get from the Skinwalkers, the end of chapter 6, and the apocalypse that plays out like the movie The Mist. Oh man, this story is good. Personally, my overall review is really just to give me a Netflix adaptation already.