Awareness comes when one least expects it.
One moment you had nothing, you were not aware of anything much less yourself.
It was as if your everything was frozen, there just was nothing there.
Then all of a sudden awareness comes to you. Once one is aware of himself naturally the next part is the awareness of the surroundings.
When I came to awareness I was just there. I had no desire to know anything but with time any awareness seeks something.
My desire was to know myself and so it came to me. My name was Alat Arim. I never liked it. Due to the numbering system in school I was always first on the teachers call list. They always went Arim tell me this, Arim how does this go or Arim lets see your homework and so on.
I hated it so one day I decided to change that. I used my name backwards spelled Mira but as that sounded girly I just went with Mir which meant Peace.
` Too bad only family and my friends ever used it. `
Once I had a name to associate with myself came the need to know where I was. That came to me too. ` My current accommodation is my Soul and with it came what a Soul is. `
` Soul? How could I be in my Soul and where does this knowledge come from? ` I asked. Again knowledge came and told me. ` It was myself that entered into it, went to sleep and the knowledge came from myself. `
` Myself, so I am recalling knowledge that I know. OK, but why would I sleep in a Soul? ` Again knowledge came and told me. ` It was to skip my childhood experience and go straight to adulthood. `
` Now I'm even more confused. Start the recollection from the earliest memories. `
With that want I began to recall my whole life.
First were my earliest memories as a baby. Then came early childhood, late childhood, early teenagerhood, late teenagerhood, young adulthood, late adulthood and then came the deciding moment.
My first death, journey through the Void, a chat with a tiny Cosmic parasite of me, our fight for survival, my eventual win over it, then the end point of my journey in the Void and the hopeful revival that went without any problems.
Understanding everything that led me here I flexed my awareness of the Soul and became aware of it and everything in it. In one corner of the Soul were memories of my new life while in another was Life Essence.
Once aware of the Life Essence I retook control of it too but did not touch the memories.
` I will deal with the memories later, first I need to retake control of the body. `
Rechecking everything in my Soul I let my awareness leave it
Once it was outside I became aware of the brain. Careful not to touch anything, I spread my awareness to the whole body.
Finally having everything back in control I issued a command for a general body systems check.
It came and everything looked fine. No major problems detected, so I initiated another but this one more detailed.
This one took more time but when one took into perspective, at how fast the brain worked it took but a minute for everything to be checked. Again no problems came forward and a relief came over me.
` Everything was fine. Good. `
Heavy with relief I opened my eyes. Immediately a felt slight pain in them as light came into contact with them but that was over in seconds. Giving my eyes Time to acclimate to the light I processed the images that showed me a white ceiling with no other color.
Giving it a few more seconds I moved my eyes left and right and noticed I was in a white room and I was not alone in it. Beside me I saw a few beds but they were empty but they looked very familiar to me.
Once the realization came that the beds were hospital beds and that I might be in a hospital came a slight panic but remembering that my body was fine it stopped growing.
But just in case I did another check and everything came back fine so in hope it truly was fine I tried to flex the muscles all over the body. The body did not actually move at all, it was more of a micro contraction of the muscles. Feeling them at work I went for bigger ones. This time one could see some muscle twitch. Feeling everything work, I thought of my hands and thought of moving them. With no delay they moved. Feeling them work I went for the legs and so did they.
Now I switched my attention to my neck and moved it left and right to flex and test them to. Then came the deciding moment, I put my attention to the front muscles of my chest and stomach all while at the same time holding the same attention to the back muscles. Once I was ready I pulled my upper body up in a 90 degree angle of the body lover body. Once it was in position I flexed them to the sides and everything worked so far.
While I felt some soreness from everything and the most likely reason would be from long inactiveness.
Having flexed the upper body I switched back to the legs. Holding my body steady with arms on the bed I had my lower body move and position my legs over the bed. Again looking around a bit I saw nothing. I detached all the instruments attached to me and went with the leap of faith that everything works and placed my legs on the ground and stood up.
Paying more attention to not lose my balance I had my body move forward then backwards. Then sideways and everything worked fine. ` Why am I in a hospital if my body works just fine? `
Asking that myself I went to the large window by the side of the room and looked outside. Once there I saw a big parking place. ` Looks like a public hospital to me. `
Looking all over it to see if there was anything interesting from behind me I heard a door being opened. Turning around I saw a woman in the 30s looking at me a bit stunned.
“ Ah you're awake. ” I heard her say. Coming out of the stunted appearance she came to me and checked me out from head to toe. “ Good you're awake. Some of us thought you won't ever wake up. ” she said in goodwill to me.
` Seeing that response it appears I was asleep for some time already. ` As if giving me a bit of time to reply I take awareness of my vocal cords and try to say something but as if not being not used in some time they needed more encouragement.
“ hau, Hau, How long have I been asleep. ” With a bit of stutter I ask her.
Hearing my question brought a smite to her face. “ Already can speak, that is even better. Honestly you were a bit of a mystery for us mister. While being hit by a car was terrible there were no big injuries but you still would not wake for some reason. You have been here with us for 3 weeks already. ” She said but soon continued. “ At first we were hopeful for a quick recovery and indeed your body healed fast but you would not wake up. Come sit back on the bed, there is no need to stress your body as it has not moved for quite some time. ”
With that she pulled me back to the bed. Once back seated she looked at me. “ Stay there, I'll go call for the doctor. ” And she was gone.
Again alone I thought for a bit but found no reason as to why I would be asleep for such a long time but it didn't really matter. What matters was that I am truly here in this Reality and it was glorious. To have my current awareness and my senses deliver all this information felt really good.
` When I think of the memories I had before this place they were all a bit dull and never had this much depth. ` Riding this moment I immersed myself into my senses but that was soon interrupted. It seemed the doctor was here.
Wearing the standard white coat of doctors he came to me. “ Hello there Mr Alat. I must say we are very happy to see you awake. Before we chat let's do some basic tests to get rid of them first. ”
With that we did some tests but to be honest i couldn't care any less about them. My body was fine but they probably won't believe me, I can actually examine my body better than their instruments could ever do nor would I even tell them that. Done with them soon after and declared healthy on the first tests and showed a broad smile at that.
“ Good everything looks good for now but do note we will do some more in depth ones later to make sure. ” said the doctor but then added. “ Now that we are done you can ask me anything you like. ”
` There was not much I really wanted to know but if I didn't ask anything it would be suspicious and would probably keep me here so best play along. ` Flexing my vocal cords again I asked. “ The nurse from before told me I had been here for 3 week? ”
“ Indeed you did. “ Confirmed the doctor. “ You were in a car accident and got hit. From what I have been told you were not hit hard and looking at the state of your body when you came in, that was true. So when at the site of the accident you would not wake up you were rushed to us.
” Taking a few seconds to recall all that happened, he continued. “Once here we examined you and found you with but a few scrapes, but still unconscious all the same. So we thought there might have been some head injuries but the scans showed nothing. After a few more tests all we could determine was that you were asleep. ”
At the end he looked at me as if I could tell him the answer but of course I wouldn't even if I knew it. Few moments later getting no reply from me he turned around and coughed once and turned his attention back at me.
“ Well it matters not even if we can't figure it out. Once the other tests are done I am sure you'll be leaving us soon anyway. ” Having said what he wanted he left me alone but before he went he said. “ Before I forget as you are awake and have no problems at all right now I will go and announce your awakening to your family and have them come pay you a visit. They should be here in a few hours. ” This time truly being done he left for good.
` Family eh, as in plural. Looks like my accident brought them into the same city. I guess even divorced they still do care for me as their son. Sadly I can't reciprocate them as much as the last years in that fake reality, I never really bothered to be a good son and probably won't here either. `
` I guess the old saying a child will never love their parents as much as they will love their child has some truths in it. Oh well, for now I'll be good and soon I'll leave for the wide world to experience it. `
` Thinking of all the things I'm gonna do once out there, and with my powers I can do anything I want but before that I will need to learn my limits. I don't want to go into the wide world and be offed as soon as I enter it. `
Thinking about my powers I turned my awareness back into myself and into my soul. Once there I examine the gathered essence in greater detail.
` Hmm, if I consider my previous theory of measurement of Life Essence with years then my current amount would be about 15 years. Less than I thought there would be. Hmm maybe the accident used up some to heal my injuries. As for the Life Essence I got before my revival, it probably was used up to ensure my timeline as best as possible. `
` Now then let's see what I can do with the current amount that I have. ` Having decided on a course of action I took all my life essence and put it back into the body.
Once it was spread out evenly Immediately I felt my awareness of the body spike by a huge amount from the previous low resolution to high definition. But it was not just simple imaging that came.
No, with the resolution came knowledge of what happened in each part of the body. When I focused on any organ of mine immediately the knowledge came to tell what it did, how it did it, its influence it had all over the body. ` Its amazing to truly be aware of your own body. `
Done with admiring my body's insides I switched my attention back to Life Essence to see if I can still take on an essence form. To test that I tried to send my essence outside my body but it failed. Wondering what the problem might be I tried again but when Life Essence left the body it was heavily pressed back into the body.
` It seems Reality has its own wishes on how Life Essence behaves once outside the body but what if I make an essence body while it's inside me? ` Immediately trying it I imagined my essence to take on the form of my current body. Once that was done I felt my awareness split.
` While I am still getting information from both they seem more muted as if more distant. `
` Lets see what happens now when I move this form outside the body? ` Taking back my awareness from the physical body and transferring it to the essence body I urged it to leave the physical body slowly.
This time once my complete essence body came out it was no longer pushed back but I could still feel the pressure. Once it was fully outside truly I felt what it meant to be separated from reality that is the physical body. It felt as if I lost an important anchor that grounded me to Reality.
Thinking of the body I tried to shift my awareness back into it to see if I could still use it. At first when I tried there was some resistance but with a greater WILL I pushed through that barrier and broke it. Once that happened again I felt my awareness split. Half here and half there.
It was weird being in two places at once and when I had both bodies look at each other it was even more so. ` Best I get used to having weird feelings for anything. Who knows what I will experience in the future. `
Pushing those feelings down I raised my physical hand but my essence hand followed too. From then on every movement I did was copied. Soon I went for different actions but just having a split mind didn't make it easier. Whenever I try to move just one somehow my orders get jumbled up and weird mixed movements happen like one body moves half and the other the other half.
` The information I received from both bodies is much too confusing right now. Let's leave it for later. ` With that I had the physical body lie down and sleep while my essence body went exploring.
First test I did when I wanted to go out of the room was to see if normal people could see me. So when I saw a nurse passing by I put out my essence arm outside the room, to see any reaction that could happen, but none came.
Nodding to that I did the same next time with my whole essence body, and still no reaction. ` Looks like I really am invisible in this form to normal people. `
With gained confidence at not getting caught I went out to explore the hospital. But to be honest it was a hospital there just was not much to explore at all. That is until I came upon an operation room. Once I saw it I immediately went in.
Doing my best to stay out of touch zone from the people around as I had no idea what would happen if we touched so I slowly inched my way to the body on the table. Again making sure I would not be touched by anybody, I let my right hand touch the body laying down.
With the contact done I sent some of my essence into the head. At first I did it slowly so as to not create unnecessary problems and having enough of a leeway if something did happen.
Seeing nothing happening I sent some more. With more Life Essence inside, more information came to me. I could see the brain and there I saw the Soul which only I could see at the moment.
Seeing it and feeling it felt no different from when i was in the Void so Ii did my infiltration technique. By mimicking the Life Essence of my unknowingly willing subject, I was inside the Soul and there I saw memories plus Life Essence that had been gathered over this one's lifetime.
` Hmm subject is about 45 years of age if I am counting the amount of essence stored. Quite young to be getting a heart bypass surgery to be honest. Looks like you've been having way too much greasy food. Although can't fault you, as they are tasty though. Here let me help a bit by being a willing subject of mine. `
With that decision I took about 20 years worth of Life Essence out of the soul and again split it two ways. Half went to me as payment for the help and the other half I spread it around and inside his heart and gave my instructions. Once the operation finished it would help heal everything and as a plus I gave additional instruction to clear out the blockages slowly over time.
Luckily I don't have to be precise with the instruction as Life Energy is heavily intent based. ` With my intervention the subject will probably get another minimum of 5-10 years of life without any problems. After that well it's not my problem. ` Withdrawing my awareness from him I gave him a good tap on the head and left
` Looks like it won't be hard to gather Life Essence for myself at all. I'll have to see later the best way to go about it. `
Done with my experiment I turn back to my room as soon my family should be here. At the same time I converted the gathered essence into my own. It was not hard to be honest. His Life Essence was only attuned to him as it came from him but had no WILL in it to command it. All it took was to inject my WILL into it and had it attune to myself, very easy.
Back in my room I saw my body lying there sleeping. I went to it and in a thought to go back to it I did another experiment. I stopped resisting the pressure the world put on my essence form. The moment I did it felt as if the world around me turned hostile and wanted to swallow me down the earth. Out of instinct of preservation I hurriedly resisted the feeling again.
“ What the hell was that? “ Cursing out loud really does help settle one's nerves even if they are only essence ones.
Not expecting it at all I was totally surprised but at the same time intrigued. As an experiment I took about 1 years worth of essence and took it outside my essence form. Once it was outside I removed my WILL and reverted its attunement to me into pure Life Essence. The moment I did that it shot through the floor.
I waited a while but saw nothing else happening so I ignored it for now. ` I will figure it out later. `
`Since my express way back into the physical body didn't work i guess the manual way it is.` I superimposed my essence body over it.
`Unlike before in The Simulator, now I have more experience and don't have to do my core first but can have it all done at once. ` With that done I undo its solid state and let it seep into the body all at once.
Done with that I regained control of the body and again I felt whole again and woke it up. Pulling my upper body up I leaned on the pillow more and waited. Somebody should be here soon anyway and best greet them with wide eyes.
I didn't have to wait for long. When I heard somebody there at the door. I turned to see which parent came first but it seems neither of them came. There at the door stood a beautiful girl of about 16 years of age. Her black hair at the front came just shy of the eyebrows but at the back went almost all the way down the back. When I looked at the face full of surprise and hope alongside those green eyes I had no choice but to admit that she was beautiful.
` WOW, Totally my type, but why is she here? ` Wondering why she stared at me like that for so long as if we knew each other, my brain wanted to tell me something but I ignored it. Now was not the time for those kinds of thoughts.
Still standing by the door and looking at me, I address her. “ Can I help you? Did you by any chance get the wrong room if so then would you move away I am expecting visitors soon. ”
This time she reacted. Tears started to build up in her eyes as she looked at me as if I said something hurtful.
Ugh tears on a beautiful maiden, my greatest weakness. Best get this over with. “ You don't have to cry for something like that and just ask the nurses for the correct room. ”
Again more tears went down. ` Now that i think about it she appears to be a bit out of breath too. `
Finally as if not being able to hold them down she cried out and assaulted me on my bed. By assault I meant more tackling but it was the cry that stunned me.
~ BROTHER ~
Yes, BROTHER she called me and started to weep on my chest. Stunned I looked down at her head buried in my chest crying while all while my insides screamed TIME OUT, TIME OUT.
` NEED more time. BURN that essence. Give me more TIME, there is a TIMELINE divergence at work here. ` With that inward cry finally time started to slow down.