Exploring the Gateway

Exploring the Gateway

by Tzuf

Warning This fiction contains:
  • Profanity
  • Sexual Content

Join John Miller as he's introduced into a fantasy world that exists parallel to our own when he is given game like powers by a mysterious god. Once he finds his footing in that world, he quickly finds himself delving into the Gateway. The Gateway is a portal to worlds which are all linked to one another and through it to earth. Each are unique in their own ways and contain different types of creatures, magic, and technology. Along his journey to explore it, he finds himself dealing with political intrigue, moral conundrums, and the complexity of human nature with a team of varied characters both with and against him. 

Updates every Sunday (10 AM GMT) and Wednesday (6 PM GMT)

Inspired by CHYOA's the Gamer story. 

  • Overall Score
  • Style Score
  • Story Score
  • Grammar Score
  • Character Score
  • Total Views :
  • 24,172
  • Average Views :
  • 483
  • Followers :
  • 88
  • Favorites :
  • 25
  • Ratings :
  • 18
  • Pages :
  • 402
Advertisement
Remove
Go to Table of Contents
Rate it
Fiction breaking rules? Report
Advertisement
Remove
Author
Tzuf

Tzuf

Achievements
3rd Anniversary
10 Comments
Word Smith (IX)
Group Leader (V)
10,000 Views
Advertisement
Remove
Table of Contents
Chapter Name Release Date
Indecipherable Dreams ago
An Introduction ago
A fateful reunion ago
New abilities, discoveries, and mysteries ago
Unknown triumphs and mysterious failures in arts and crafts. ago
Learning the basics of mind manipulation ago
A mystery in class and an encounter ago
Getting some insurance ago
Rewards galore ago
A brand new day ago
Conviction of innocence ago
Insight into intuition ago
A date with Alice ago
The following days ago
Disappearing into the Gateway ago
A necessary use for an immoral tool ago
A world of darkness ago
Freedom is never free ago
The Council ago
A rival and a friend ago
A moment of quiet ago
Survival is key ago
Discovery is the name of the game ago
Exploration is the only way ago
Finally, some explanations ago
Settling in ago
Arc Epilogue Part 1: Nothing ends... ago
Arc Epilogue Part 2: ...Like you want it to ago
Author’s Notes (Volume 1 Arc 1 “The Gateway”) ago
Prologue: Welcome to the first day of the rest of your life. ago
An exercise in teamwork ago
An exercise in futility ago
An exercise in understanding. ago
Guiding Light ago
The name’s Miller, John Miller. ago
Sorting things out. ago
Some peace and quiet. ago
Time to process. ago
Grasping the unknown ago
Delving into the wolf's den. ago
Power tested ago
Intelligence is not all it's cracked up to be ago
More than meets the eye. ago
Rest and relaxation ago
Prep work ago
Information gathering ago
Dawn of the first day ago
Manual labor ago
Encounter with an infestation ago
Taking a break ago

Leave a review

drakan_glasses BE NICE! Fair critique is fair, but be respectful & follow the review rules. There will be no mercy.
Reviews
Sort by:
xenofixus
Overall
Style
Story
Grammar
Character

I would love this if John was older

Reviewed at: A date with Alice

Overall: If you are looking for another system novel and are find with a cast of teenage main characters acting like teenagers then give this a read. Advanced review criteria below the spoiler.

This is more a preference than anything but as someone who left their teenage years behind quite a long time ago I don't want to deal with teenage angst. I don't want to deal with perpetual teens in the real world, I certainly don't want to read about them.

John is a teen so him acting like one makes sense. At the same time I am spending chapter after chapter watching him make the same mistakes over and over again. I am watching him act without thinking, go back on promises he made to people he cares about, tell people way more information about himself than he should.

I read 15 chapters in before I felt the urge to look ahead to see if he had changed. I was dissapointed to see that even after 40+ chapters he was still acting like an angsty teenager with poor decision making skills.

I don't expect him to suddenly become a genius, either intellectually or emotionally, but I felt like 25 chapters should have been sufficient for him to 

stop lieing to/hiding stuff from his girlfriend.


For Advanced:

 - Style: Overall good. Nothing stuck out that would elevate this to great but nothing really detracted from it either. The images denoting the system prompts/dialogs are a nice touch.

- Story: Again overall good but I had to dock some points since it is extremely easy to draw parallels between this novel and the chyoa version of 'The Gamer'. This is further hurt because when 'The Gamer' (web comic version) first came out 'system' novels were not mainstream. Now that they are the concept can at times feel like a lesser version of more innovative stories.

- Grammar: Nothing glaringly obvious stuck out in this area but I make it a point to basically never give 5 points as I am so inundated with bad writing that I hardly notice mistakes anymore.

- Character: This is where my complaints come in. The characters often feel flat and lack growth as characters. Sure they may grow as stat sheets but it doesn't feel like their personalities evolve through their trials and tribulations. Unfortunately this is something that is extremely common in new writers. Writing characters that have visible growth takes experience that needs to be built up over time, both through the author's life experiences and through the art of writing itself.