Beware Of Chicken

Beware Of Chicken

by Casualfarmer

Warning This fiction contains:
  • Gore
  • Profanity
  • Sexual Content
  • Traumatising content

Jin Rou wanted to be a cultivator who defied the heavens, and surpassed all limits.

Unfortunately for him, he died, and now I’m stuck here. Arrogant young masters? Heavenly tribulations? Cultivating for days on end, then getting into life or death battles?

Yeah, no thanks. I'm getting out of here.

In which a transmigrator decides that the only winning move is not to play.

Beware of Chicken will be updated Monday to Wednesday, and then Friday.

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Word Count (13)
Royal Bloodline
Table of Contents
Chapter Name Release Date
Chapter 1: He Bravely Turned His Tail and Fled ago
Chapter 2: Rice Farming 101 ago
Chapter 3: Beneath the Crescent Moon ago
Chapter 4: Nothing But a Hound Dog ago
Chapter 5: Verdant Hill ago
Chapter 6: "Young Master", Type 19 ago
Chapter 7: Country Roads ago
Chapter 8: Experimental Procedure ago
Chapter 9: Title Drop ago
Chapter 10: Lift Together ago
Chapter 11: The Newcomers ago
Chapter 12: The Mid-Autumn Festival ago
Chapter 13: The Spirit Furnace ago
Chapter 14: Winnie the Poo ago
Chapter 15: Side Quest ago
Chapter 16: Commandment ago
Chapter 17: Counting the Days ago
Chapter 18: Cracked Moon ago
Chapter 19: ROUS ago
Chapter 20: An Autumn Leaf ago
Chapter 21: The First Flakes ago
Chapter 22: Meanwhile, Back at the Town... ago
Chapter 23: The Young Mistress ago
Chapter 24: The Princess and the General ago
Chapter 25: The Students ago
Chapter 26: Two Pig Open Sleigh ago
Chapter 27: The March ago
Chapter 28: Strength and Skill ago
Chapter 29: The Great Master ago
Chapter 30: Something Worth Recognition ago
Chapter 31: A Glorified Battery ago
Chapter 32: Choices ago
Chapter 33: A Blade of Grass ago
Chapter 34: The Goalie and the Dishwasher ago
Chapter 35 Connections ago
Chapter 36: Homecoming ago
Chapter 37: Rewarded ago
Chapter 38: Preparing for the Night ago
Chapter 39: Jin-gle Bells ago
Chapter 40: Dawn ago
Chapter 41: Tick Tock Goes The Clock ago
Chapter 42: A Lull ago
Chapter 43: Broth and Ice ago
Chapter 44: A Fox and A "Deer" ago
Chapter 45: Statues and a House ago
Chapter 46: Vengeance and Hives ago
Chapter 47: Observe ago
Chapter 48: Ignite ago
Chapter 49: The Final Stretch ago
Chapter 50: Setting Sail, Coming Home ago
Deleted Scene from chapter 50. ago
Chapter 51: Wedding Part 1 ago
Chapter 52: Wedding Part 2 ago
Chapter 53: The End of the Beginning ago
Vol1: Epilogue ago
Volume 1.5: Kintsugi ago
Vol 2 Chapter 1: Full Steam Ahead ago
V2, Chapter 2: Each Day a Blessing ago
V2 Chapter 3: Crossed Blades ago
Interlude: Lost As Hell ago
v2 Chapter 4: A Fine Morning ago
V2: Chapter 5: But One Flaw ago
Interlude 2: The Twilight ago
V2 C6: A Bee ago
v2c7: A Meeting ago
v2c8: A Needle ago
V2c9: Dream ago
v2c10: Routine ago
V2C11: I'm Here ago
V2 C12: I Scream ago
Interlude 3: Q=V/t ago
v2 C 13: Hong Xian ago
v2 c14: Jin Rou ago
v2 c15: A Lady ago
v2c16: Secret Spot ago
v2c17: Still ago
Collected LN Teasers ago
v2c18: Rat and Cat ago
Interlude: Heart of the Swarm, ago
v2C19: Boar ago
v2 C20: Knock-off Part 1 ago
v2 c20: Knock off Part 2 ago
v2c21: The Search ago
v2 c22: Set out Stay in ago
V2 C 23: A Past Conversation ago
v2c24: Righteousness ago
v2c25: Plants and Clothes ago
v2 c26: Preparations ago
v2 c27.1: The Town ago
v2 c27.2 ago
27.3 ago
v2 c28: Depart ago
v2 c29.1: The Hills ago
29.2 ago
v2 c29.3 ago
Interlude 4: The Waterfall ago
Image: Meiling Coloured ago
V2C30.1: Progress ago
v2 C30.2 ago
v2 c30.3 ago
v2 c31: The Child ago
v2 c32: Conversations ago
33.1: The Legend Begins ago
v2 c33.2 ago
v2c34: The Correct Place ago
v2 C 35: House and a City ago
V2 C 36: Length and Breadth ago
v2c37: Conundrum ago
v2c38: Wager ago
v2c39: These Halcyon Days ago
v2c40: Understand ago
v2 c41: Stay the Course ago
v2c42: Transform? ago
v2c43: Wheat and the Blade ago
v2c44: Ash Forest ago
v2c45: The Plum Blossom's Shadow ago
v2c46: The Cat's Question ago
v2c47: Foiled ago
v2c48: On the Road ago
v2c49: Around the Town ago
Interlude Yun Ren: Tale of the Fox ago
Interlude Yun Ren Part 2 ago
Interlude Yun Ren Final: Back Under the Summer Sky ago
v2c50: Symbols and Names ago
v2C 51: Fangs and the Deep ago
v2c52: Crystal ago
v2c53: Recognizing Limits ago
v2c54: Burden of Trust ago
v2c55: Past, Present, Future ago
v2c56: One Last Dance ago
v2c57: See You Again ago
Interlude: The War and The Rooster ago
v2c58: Growing by Miles ago
v2c59: People and Places Part 1 ago
v2c59: People and Places part 2 ago
v2c59: People and Places Part 3 ago
v2c60: The Dueling Peaks ago
v2c61: Sect Business ago
v2c62: Wayward Companion ago
v2c63: Registration ago
v2c64: The Smaller Blade of Grass part 1. ago

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drakan_glasses BE NICE! Fair critique is fair, but be respectful & follow the review rules. There will be no mercy.
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Personally I thoroughly enjoy this story. I generally enjoy xianxia novels, but this one brought an entirely new take to the genre completely changing the rules, while still undeniably remaining in the same category. The characters were all slightly one dimensional at the start, mostly being one defining trait each, e.g. arrogance, greed, caring, but they all have evolved since then and have become much more interesting. I would say there might be slightly too many characters to give them all their chance in the spotlight, but still overall the characters are quite good. In terms of grammar I don't pay that much attention to it so I don't feel like I can give it a perfect score, but I haven't really noticed any mistakes. I absolutely love how smoothly xianxia and slice of life have been combined with the MC focusing more on life, but with the aspects of power and training following him with his animals. This effectively lets me get the typical happy chemicals from the advancement while still not making it the main focus of the story and letting the characters evolve rather than just being generally determined and getting more powerful. I don't really know enough about writing to critique the style, but the pacing is quite nice and I have no problems with the story in that regard. Overall an AMAZING story.


if anyone was like me and was turned off by the writing style of the second half of the first chapter, stick it out. the excessive swear word internet-style prose quickly matures into something more natural and less embarassing for mc's voice.

its pretty interesting how the author maintains their ability to switch between voices with the pov. anyway its a good story is all im saying if you can gird your loins from some early awkwardness


Tolerable Xianxia. Is such a thing even possible?

Reviewed at: Chapter 52: Wedding Part 2

Keeping in mind this whole site is stuffed full of fan-fiction tier word salad:

1 star - Trash. Unless you orgasm from certain genres or the MC is literally you but in a power fantasy stay away.

3 stars - Junk food. Nothing to brag about, but not fingernails on chalkboard bad. B movie with some nice popcorn.

5 stars - Good enough to recommend even if it's not in your genre wheelhouse. Not many of these even in the "Best Rated". lmao

Grading grammar and spelling is dumb unless it's so bad as to be unreadable.


A surprisingly enjoyable take on generic xianxia tropes. Not to the degree of parody or satire, simply tweaking the generic dumpsterfire just enough to make it fun.

Philosophy can be tricky to pull of in fiction but the author managed to keep the MCs "Simple life as best as I can" on track. No silly diatribes or phony moral conundrums to show how wise MC is, just some wholesome fun and a bit of elbow grease. The true path to enlightenment.

Having said that, the generic tropes are still there and I am not sure how long the bland but enjoyable slice of life can stave off the hoard of young masters to come (and they will come. xianxia is xianxia) so I couldnt quite bring myself to give it 5 stars.

Never thought I would enjoy a story in which a side character chicken has character developement. Props to the author for that.

3 Stars. As it turns out, yes, tolerable xianxia is possible. What a strange timeline.


I like how to plant a seed!!

Reviewed at: Chapter 10: Lift Together

I give you 4 hints for that, hoping for chapter is promising too i currently reading chapter 10 and that makes me rate after reading it all.. i was hoping the next chapter is give me more what i expecting.. i just have a humour about this line 

Hanging onto a cart of rice, while Jin ran as fast as a horse.

Do that face too like a horse.. 




Continder for the title, greatest story ever told.

Reviewed at: v2c58: Growing by Miles

I know it is treason to speak of a contender to 'The Princess Bride', but Beware of chicken may have a slight chance of dethroning William Goldman's masterpiece.


A thrilling tale that is a mixture of adventure, romance and comedy. While you may be asking, 'wait which story is he talking about?' and the answer is YES! Both of these wonderful tales are complex and veried in their magnificense.


I'll just say I cannot wait for the Beware of Chicken Movie! Please someone make it.


I am not a fan of the Xianxia genre. I've never touched it before. I didn't even really properly know what it was until I read through this. I binged this over a day and a half. It was all I could think about during those two days, and then I fell off not long after the epilogue.

This story is like cotton candy: sweet, colorful, fluffy. The chicken has the best character arc, and that's where a lot of the comedy comes from. I wasn't fully on board until that first "fight," which had me howling.

The four stars are for how it kept me hooked, and the sheer number of times it made me laugh. Some elements were repeated a little too much, but they were extremely enjoyable in the first place. I've removed one collective star from some minor grammar stuff, and the fact (correct me if I'm wrong) that a "final boss" type character was given a lot of emphasis and build-up, mentioned one last time in the middle preparing to search for the main, and then, to my knowledge, was never seen or heard from again. RIP you random oily idiot, I waited for you until the very end.


Despite having bad grammar for the first 10 chapters or so it was an excellent start. Unfortunately the more effort that the author put in the lower the quality of the story over all became. World building reduced over time and characters didn't develope but degraded. 

One example would be the female lead. She was introduced as cute, freckled, head strong, protective and ignorant of her charms. But as the story goes on she becomes/reveled to be spiteful, lustful, thinks to highly of herself. All the while MC acts like nothing has changed about her. Author is ignorant of the fact that the girl whom sings about f*cking a donkey and licks someones chest is not the same girl as was promised. 


A good ish read. A novel idea for this website.

Though looking at it in the context of this abundance of praise, the novel seems nothing much. It falls to the same set of cliches it tries to mock. It's the worst kind of satire - the one that subverts the whole genre. 

Grammar though could be its strongest part. It’s fully bearable.

I see so much praise for the "lightness of style". While the story only employs simplicity of concepts. Note that said concepts are no more diverse that an average *xia story. 

Ideas are delivered in a begginer's manner. Though I am sure the author grows with the story, he or she breakers the description's promise. It hints of a cerebral character exploring a Confucianistic universe through the eyes or a rational, sensible person. The story even sets on with a mocking string of decisions. Which is then ruined by a standard character development. Exactly as its fellow average Chinese style web novels do. The formula is: 1 target encounters nuisances; 2 he/she not strong enough; 3 magically get strong; 4 solve nuisance; 5 repeat. Bonus points for showing no emotions. Double points for character exposition by fellow existences’ praise.

Characters are flat. To the point of not existing in this novel. There are only simple placeholder NPCs. I heard half of wuxiaworld is suing for intellectual rights. Take for example MC’s girlfriend’s father. He is a person that just sees a guy someday. Magically becomes best friends with the guy. Then says absolutely nothing when his underage daughter returns one night sweating and disheveled alongside the MC. He asks her absolutely nothing.

Furthermore, the people, or should I say the one-line deliverers, are at least developed rather consistently. The clicheic deployment is steadily increased with every chance. There is a chicken in the novel. It *a wizard did it* magically gains sentience. Then *a wizard did it* somehow speaks in the exact manner a feudal Chinese person would.

Sorry not sorry for the negativity. The text is just too un-ironic for its pretense.



The MC has barely arrived in a world dominated by abusive psychopaths who are near-infinitely more powerful than he is (he is a frog in a well), so what does he do?  Get a random gf and start to plan a family, because of course his plot armor garantees that everything will easily work out for them...

What annoys me immensely with this story is how the MC does everything on a half-baked feeling.  He wants to feel good and be comfortable all the time, so he just narrow-mindedly focuses on that.  I never get the feeling that he has a smart long-term plan in mind - he is just going to YOLO everything on his path to max comfort, aiming for max comfort from the very start, because why would you ever let yourself be uncomfortable, really?

Being single?  That's not as nice as getting laid every night, so just accept the advances of the first village girl to show up - don't worry, there is plot armor!

MC is a 'nice guy', so he proudly flexes his 'nice guy' chops by picking an average looking girl - but, big surprise, the 'average girl' he randomly picked (because she is the first girl to have shown interest in him) is actually an ultra-rare magic girl!!!

The MC disgusts me, basically.  He just is 'nice' to people and his only goal in the world seems to be to aim for a myopically comfortable life for himself and his future family - as if they could ever truly be safe/happy/flourishing given the state of the world they live in...

MC is 'nice' to bad guys (ex: antagonizing and then letting total psychopaths go without a care in the world), just like he is 'nice' to villagers by showing them up constantly (of course poor villagers are all simple-minded and nice back to him, because plot armor).

Anyhow, the story basically has a lot of 'nice' moments, but if you analyze them closely, it becomes sadly apparent that they are all lame.  I feel a ton of cringe from the bad karma the MC is accumulating due to his poor decision making.

What is kind of funny however is how the grossly underachieving MC is basically doing everything possible to guarantee a passionless romance and mariage.  His only hook is easy money and clout (+ fake kindness), so the gf is just being turned on by materialistic greed, which is absolutely disgusting to watch, never works long-term, and cannot generate true passion.  (Much like how trying to buy friends with money is pathetic and only generates parasites rather than true friends.)

In any case, the world-building is totally incoherent: in a psychotic xianxia world of power-tripping 'young masters', being a peasant means being victimized constantly.  It means grieving and raging because your loved ones were abducted/raped/crippled/murdered/etc, or seriously worrying about it happening at least.

Instead, everything and everyone is nice and pleasant, 100% untraumatized, even though according to the story they supposedly should be worried about any pretty girl in their midst being spotted by one of the 'young masters' and their depraved henchmen.  (As in: what was the reason the MC felt compeled to pick an average looking girl in the first place?)

Why is this rated so highly i seriously cant see where the story is going
how does the MC make such and important life changing decision ie quitting the sect and becoming a farmer in such an arbitrary manner? with absolutely no info on the new world and how it functions.
Who the hell lets a chicken sit on his shoulder i mean wtf man how does it even get there chikens r unweildy as hell.
All in all i dont recommed it but if u got nothing better to do u can go ahead and read it maybe youll get a few laughs here and there