Abyssal Road Trip

Abyssal Road Trip

by redhand

Warning This fiction contains:
  • Gore
  • Profanity
  • Sexual Content
  • Traumatising content

Julia is a practical person. All she wanted was a home and family to call her own, a small piece of the world she could say was hers.

Instead of arriving home one evening, Julia finds herself in the Abyss. Now she's not only far from home, she's trapped inside a cursed body.

The curse may have caught her, but she certainly wouldn't let it or anyone else tell her how she has to live. It's not a hero that you have to watch out for, it's the practical person when you're in the way of their freedom.

Hell is a place for the organised torment of the guilty in life while the Abyss is its sociopathic disorganised cousin.

There’s darkness in the Abyss, and darkness within her that might draw it in.

But she'll need to risk its strength, for to get out, she'll need to become strong enough to descend to its deepest reaches.

Yet it's in those places that the most dangerous secrets lie in wait.

These aren’t the type of secrets that are valuable, or that anyone wants to be found.

These secrets destroy.



Image by Comfreak from Pixabay



This is my first story, and a work in progress. Feel free to point out any errors, and I will gladly fix them.

The ending and the major plot points are all planned out. 

Julia's story is more of a slow burn, and she won't always be in trouble. There will be breathers between the action.

Though the story is about Julia, she is not the only force in play. Her actions will affect others, and the actions of others will affect her as well.

Chapter Releases presently on Tuesday and Friday - 18:30 Sydney Time (AEST)

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redhand

redhand

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Table of Contents
218 Chapters
Chapter Name Release Date
0 - Damnation ago
1 - Emerging ago
2 - Time to make a change ago
3 - In the land of the blind ago
4 - The only way is up. ago
5 - Come on baby light my fire ago
6 - One small step ago
7 - Ashes to Ashes, Dust to dust ago
8 - Pitstop ago
9 - Blood can be a Poison ago
10 - Jail House Rock ago
11 - Reduce, Reuse, Recycle ago
12 - Uncomfortablly numb ago
13 - Contact ago
14 - The tolling of the Iron bell ago
15 - Oath of Blood ago
16 - Terms and Conditions apply ago
16.5 - Reference Details ago
17 - You are wind beneath my wings ago
18 - You can ring my bell ago
19 - Reach out and touch me ago
20 - I want to break free ago
21 - Take what's mine ago
22 - (Together) We will go our way ago
23 - A Hard Day's Knight ago
24 - Hard Truths ago
25 - It takes a village ago
26 - Dead to the world ago
27 - The Good, The Bad, and the Worst ago
28 - A Light in the Darkness ago
29 - Going under... ago
30 - Siren Song ago
31 - Don't even fix same price. ago
32 - Fire and Ice ago
33 - Gonna make you an offer. ago
34 - His every broken enemy will know ago
35 - Sticks and stone. ago
36 - Underground ago
37 - A little bit off Today ago
38 - The sound of Music ago
39 - Toe the Line ago
40 - New Rules ago
41 - What are you going to do now? ago
42 - Under new management ago
43 - Fury road ago
44 - Clockwork Asylum ago
45 - Despite all my rage ago
46 - Pain in full ago
47 - Ashes to Ashes, Blood to Dust ago
48 - I'm going to show you crazy ago
49 - Gone away ago
50 - She's so mean ago
51 - The Hollow ago
52 - Can't you feel my heart's desire ago
53 - Dirty Deeds, done dirt cheap ago
Interlude - Choices ago
54 - Everyone hurts ago
55 - Let's Dance ago
56 - Through the Valley ago
57 - The Pit ago
58 - In another time ago
59 - Losing my religion ago
60 - Is there anyone home? ago
61 - Sledgehammer ago
Interlude - Clothes make the man - Part 1 ago
Interlude - Clothes make the man - Part 2 ago
62 - Chained to the rhythm ago
63 - Feel Good Inc ago
64 - Shockwave ago
65 - Warning ago
66 - Knocking on Heaven's door ago
67 - The Catalyst ago
68 - Right back where we started from ago
Interlude - Chained in Hell ago
69 - Dangerous Woman ago
70 - Popular Monster ago
71 - Getting to know you. ago
72 - You really got me ago
73 - C Minor ago
Interlude - I've been working like a Dog ago
74 - We didn't start the fire ago
Interlude - Missionary Position ago
75 - Darkness Settles in ago
76 - Burning down the House ago
77 - It's Alright ago
78 - The Light ago
79 - All I know so far ago
80 - Some like it Hot ago
81 - What lies ahead ago
82 - Cutthroat ago
83 - Behind your walls ago
84 - Something from nothing. ago
85 - Shot through the heart ago
86 - Clear the air ago
87 - Between the lines ago
88 - Demons are a girl's best friend ago
89 - Pride is the Devil ago
90 - Come together ago
91 - Lift me up ago
92 - The hand that feeds you ago
93 - Savages ago
94 - Blood in the water ago
95 - Downfall ago
Interlude - Sweet Dreams ago
96 - Don't bring me down. ago
97 - Home ago
98- Welcome to the Party ago
99 -Land of confusion ago
100 - Control ago
101 - One way or another ago
102 - Stone ago
103 - All Nightmare long ago
104 - Heavy Metal ago
105 - Let us burn ago
106 - Vermilion ago
107 - Stricken ago
108 - Broken ago
109 - You can't always get what you want ago
110 - Have a nice day ago
111 - Hear me now ago
112 - Money ago
113 - Its been awhile ago
114 - Toxicity ago
115 - Hurt ago
116 - Call me by your name ago
117 - Jungle Fever ago
118 - Rock and a hard place ago
119 - Tears don't fall ago
120 - Exodus ago
121 - Here I go again ago
122 - Born this way ago
123 - Closer ago
124 - Nightwish ago
125 - Fix you ago
126 - Famous last words ago
127 - Never too late ago
128 - Ain't no rest for the wicked ago
129 - This is gonna hurt ago
130 - Bad Habits ago
131 - Cover me in sunshine ago
132 - Good enough ago
133 - I refuse ago
134 - It's a kind of magic ago
135 - In my place ago
136 - How's it supposed to feel ago
137 - Til I hear 'em say ago
138 - Time to start the healing ago
139 - Welcome to the black parade ago
140 - History ago
141 - Battle lines ago
142 - Tormented ago
143 - Umbra ago
144 - Under your scars ago
Interlude: Desires ago
145 - Sparks in the Darkness ago
146 - Push it ago
147 - Who are you? ago
148 - Uncaged Birds ago
149 - The Unforgiven ago
150 - Lash out ago
151 - Everyday is a winding road ago
152 - One step closer ago
153 - Where is my mind? ago
154 - Just go away ago
155 - The frayed ends of sanity ago
156 - If you try sometimes ago
157 - Get what you need. ago
158 - Watch your words ago
159 - Angel of Death ago
Interlude: Betrayer ago
160 - Another one bites the dust ago
161 - Remnant ago
162 - New Divide ago
163 - A breath of fresh air ago
164 - Changes ago
165 - Wrecking ball ago
166 - Memories ago
167 - All the things she said. ago
168 - You learn ago
169 - A reason to fight ago
170 - Shake it out ago
171 - Decisions ago
172 - How's it going to be? ago
173 - Imperfection ago
174 - The Unforgiven II ago
175 - Regret ago
176 - Ashes to Ashes ago
177 - Lithium Flower ago
178 - The outside ago
179 - From the inside ago
180 - Light in the Dark ago
181 - Evil Angel ago
182 - Metamorpheus ago
183 - Glory ago
184 - Gift of life ago
185 - Lifetime ago
186 - Warning ago
187 - Visiting Hours ago
188 - Moving on up. ago
189 - Insight ago
190 - Home again ago
191 - Picking up the pieces ago
192 - Climb together ago
193 - Trading places ago
194 - Turn the Page ago
195 - Destination unknown ago
196 - Open season ago
197 - Hungry like the wolf ago
198 - See you again ago
199 - Bitter Harvest ago
200 - Sleeping in the cold below ago
201 - Lucky ago
202 - Ain't it a drag ago
203 - Into the darkest desires [NSFW][TW] ago
203 - Into the darkest desires [Fade Version] ago
204 - Music to my ears ago
205 - My mother told me ago
206 - Maze ago

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Reviews
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MDMANN
Overall
Style
Story
Grammar
Character

An interesting premise, well executed. The MC is (unfairly) cursed to the Abyss and incarnates as a virginal succubus. Less prudish than stubborn, she attempts to ascend out of demonhood whilst trapped in forced oaths, compelled on her by others. Unrealised sexual potential that bubbles away but doesn't dominate nor get too explicit.

A progression fantasy, it follows dnd rules and structures for the most part and is clearly and logically explained. The stats pages are behind spolier tags, making them easy to ignore or read when wanted. 

It's dark in a nice way, with the MC practical and offering hope where she can sensibly. Character is flawed in a believable way with reasonable improvements.

A few minor typos, that get fixed pretty quickly. My favourite part is the system and progression which is roughly based on 3.5 expanded to include more skills, resistances, affinities (magical aptitudes) and multiple classes which hangs together very well.

There's a nice mix of politics and action with a fleshed out world incorporating traditional mythos adapted from the Norse, Greek, Roman, Egyptian and other pantheons, plus non human races.

I'm enjoying it. There have been a few cliffs, but publishing has been reliable and on schedule.

Mynthio
Overall
Style
Story
Grammar
Character

A devilishly good story

Reviewed at: 51 - The Hollow

Let's start with some points for improvement. The grammar is sporadically horrendous, the reason for the comparatively high score is that the mistake often boils down to the wrong syntax, presumably from rewriting sentences partway through and thus is still readable with no to almost no guesswork needed.

Next up is a compound problem where things aren't explained well or hard to understand (such as the Skill listing being a mess) which coupled with the grammar can make for a challenging riddle, though there ought not to be one.

The characters are well-crafted and realistic. The characters have their own interests and though most are self-serving there are no comic book villains who are evil for the sole purpose of being evil. The protagonist is likeable and has common sense.  Besides this, all characters are unique and fun to read about.

I find the story to as of yet contain a lack of overarching goal or plot that would keep a readers attention to the big picture instead of only focusing on the here and now, but the beginnings of such can already be found, and I consider this fiction already well worth my time and hopefully yours too. Should you wish to give it a try I'd recommend reading at least until chapter 4. All in all, any fan of LitRPGs should read this, and many more besides.

Steelheart
Overall
Style
Story
Grammar
Character

Surprisingly deep lore and interesting characters

Reviewed at: 82 - Cutthroat

First of all, I think this story is quite good. The premise is intriguing and it is fairly well executed. Instead of reading this review, you should read the story.

The following review is mostly aimed at the author anyway, to hopefully help him or her improve.

The grammar is good.

The story is quite original and there are several subplots being developed.

And with that let's get to the style:

While no Brandon Sanderson or George R. R. Martin, the style is alright in my opinion. Sometimes things aren't quite clear to me, but that could just be the fact that I am reading it a chapter at a time, which means I tend to forget certain details.

The dialogue could probably use some work though. Especially the inner monologues with the "voices in her head" are sometimes confusing. In general I would advise to give more information about who is saying what and how (are they shouting, giving an opinion, showing an emotion, whispering, threatening?). Since currently a dialogue often consists of just the words the conversing parties say directly one after another.

 

The characters are fairly distinct, most of them have a distinct personality, though some are very confusing.

like Lêdhins, I never got that character, might be due to the aforementioned problem of reading a chapter at a time though.

 

For anyone who has actually read through all that, you should definitely check out this story. It is very much worth your time.

RottenTangerine
Overall
Style
Story
Grammar
Character

A story that keeps pulling you back in

Reviewed at: 96 - Don't bring me down.

I'm constantly surprised by this story. Every time I reach a point where I'm not super interested in the story, something new happens and I get dragged back in. Without going into spoilers, each more questionable portion eventually resolves itself into a helpful change for the story and one I personally appreciated. I would 100% recommend this story and am very glad its updated as regularly as it is. 

Taking off stars because grammar isn't perfect (but mistakes aren't frequent enough or bad enough to distract from the story) and a half star as a few characters seem to be included to be obviously so the "bad guy" with few qualities to make me interested in them. The worst offender was recently improved so I can't even say much negative about that. 

The story and background themselves are very complex, understandable, and unique. While the story pulls from other media, it is combined in a unique and refreshing way. Character growth is different without being confusing or frustrating and the author does a good job of allowing the character to grow and get stronger without it being a situation of "the big villain was just defeated but now there's an even bigger one who will destroy even more and is even more powerful". Growth is interesting and well put together. 

Great story overall. 9.5 / 10, would recommend. 

luda305
Overall

Dammit, Another One I Forgot to Review

Reviewed at: 103 - All Nightmare long

You know, I've been reading this for such a long time. And I even ko-fi'd the author.  And yet, I find another great fiction that I somehow haven't reviewed (did rate though).

In short, this is an excellent LitRPG involving a reimagined metaverse combining basically all the pantheons and mythologies known on Earth. The author is seemingly very knowledgeable about this, and does a great job tying them all together, but substantively and within the LitRPG framework he has going.  And through it all, he tells a great story about a young woman who was cursed and now struggles to break free from her demonic shell. 

I'm frankly baffled that this is rated as poorly as it is.  And none of the written reviews are particularly enlightening on why so many readers give it such a low rating that the average rating is as low as it is. 

My only real complaint is that sometimes the lore gets so deep and following along from chapter to chapter (2x weekly) can be difficult.  But that's a frankly intermiitent point and I think the author is much more conscientous of that as of late. 

Vegetables
Overall

Going to have to give it a bit more time, but so far this has been an enjoyable romp.

The MC is unique even given the somewhat common transformed into a demon trope, and its refreshing that she's realistically asexual given the situation she's found herself dumped in. Oh and she's not dumb...

Other characters are fleshed out, all have their own motivations and goals.  So far no cardboard villains to be found. 

No complaints about the writing, minor grammar issues here and there but nothing too detracting.

One thing that did confuse the hell out of me initially was the inner monologue - I had colour overriden, so I couldnt tell what was going on since everything was black.  Maybe not relying purely on colour for this would be a good idea.  Try italics, hyphenation or something else like hashing the start of the sentence perhaps.

One thing that would be nice is a bit more detail on each of the planes that have been visited.

 

Nyx Katalixi
Overall

I find myself enjoying the read greatly. I personally love female MCs as I find it much more relatable and here our heroine feels "real" to me considering her circumstances. She is not perfect, nor a villain however she is adaptable and able to be influenced. A fun read that I want more of. 

sleepyblinky
Overall

Well written story with good characterisation

Reviewed at: 67 - The Catalyst

The story is well written with a steadily developing plot. The premise is interesting and remains relevant as the story progresses without devolving into a revenge story. Characters are fleshed out with their own motivations and circumstances. Spelling and grammar are reasonably good, and new chapters are released regularly. Well worth the read.

Eifer
Overall

Great Story - Too much POV switch

Reviewed at: 198 - See you again

I loved this story in the beginning, it really had me hooked and I think it has great potential. I specially love the MC's development through the story and find it easy to see the world from her perspective. My only wish in that regard would have been a bit more focus on her friends and their journey rather than side characters.

 

Sadly I'll have to put it away because I simply can't keep up with the POV switches that's become a constant every new chapter.
It's super jarring escpecially because a lot of the characters have multiple names or actually change names and that makes it hard to stay immersed because I constantly have to think back on who's who.

It ends up feeling like I don't really know any of the persons in question and I'm frankly losing touch with the MC because most of the story by this point isn't her anymore, but side characters.

 

Anyway, for those people who don't mind frequent POV switches I highly recommend this story.

ssalogel
Overall
Style
Story
Grammar
Character

Classic Fantasy Story with DnD style lore/system

Reviewed at: 116 - Call me by your name

Overall:
Great story if you want a progression fantasy, with easily graspable rules, with a little bit of System Rules cheesing for fun and profits, detailed characters and well balanced story elements.
Style:
Abyssal Road Trip is a great mix of DnD style rules, myths usage and plain good storytelling. This is what the Power of Ten wishes it was, if it wanted to be a well balanced story instead of number crunching with a plot.

Story:
The plot has great narrative impetus that make sense and bring you along, with classical begginings and a quick but earned power gain. We can see that there's a power ceiling, but MC is not near it yet. The plot goes quick and hard, but still lets you breathe.
Grammar: 
No flagrant problems so far, and if you wait a couple days after publication, the most egregious errors and typos are corrected.
Character score:
This story's less strong point. We could probably do with a little bit more character exploration, especially of the side characters. We are quite deeply embedded in the MC psyche.
 
 
 I strongly recommend this story for any who like DnD lore, but wants it seen in a non-TTRPG style story.