Reborn - Book 1 of the Jade Phoenix Saga (A Wuxia LitRPG Series)

by freedcats

Warning This fiction contains:
  • Gore
  • Profanity
  • Traumatising content

In an ancient world of death and blood, a child born to be great is crippled before she can even crawl.  She spends the next seven years of her life treated as trash by most of her family, clan and city until a series of unlikely events grants her an opportunity to be more. 

Join our young MC, Fenghuang Yu (Jade Phoenix), as she struggles to move beyond her past and reaches for a greater future despite the odds.  She is forced into brutal combat, political intrigue, sinister plots and painful tribulations as she attempts to show everyone  she can be more than she was.  


This is a coming of age wuxia cultivation story with light LitRPG elements including some tables and very limited system messages.  While this book contains only limited swearing, there are detailed fight scenes, blood with some gore, and quite a bit of violence both human on human and human on creature.  There is no material sexual content.


The average chapter is approximately 1,750-2,750 words so I am only releasing 3 per week - Mon, Wed, Fri.  Much less often than my other story, sorry.  This story is published on Royal Road ONLY.  If you are reading it elsewhere it is being unlawfully published and could you please let me know.  Thank you.

NOTE: THIS BOOK IS BROKEN DOWN INTO 12 VOLUMES.  THEY ARE NOT INDIVIDUAL BOOKS, JUST GROUPS OF CHAPTERS WITH SIMILAR TOPICS COMBINED.  IT IS TO MAKE UNDERSTANDING PLACE IN STORY AND GOING BACK TO FIND OLD INFO EASIER. 

**This story is copyrighted.  Any attempt to plagiarize and claim this writing as your own with be reported to the sites as well as the authorities.**

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freedcats

freedcats

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TomWrites
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Overall 4.5/5: A solid but standard take on the "hero rising from nothing" trope set in a familiar Xianxia universe. I had a good time reading it. The grammar needs some work, and so far the characters have not been all that fleshed out, but those looking for a comfortable, familiar progression fantasy would do well to give this a read.

Style 4.5/5: While there's nothing especially new here, its a clean and engaging take.

Concept and Setting Style: This seems to have a pretty standard Xianxia setting, with cultivation stages centered around Qi,  core forming, etc, with a very light system on top that gives numerical values to some things and proficiency levels in others (it seems to be purely descriptive so far, with no skill trees the MC must select from or things like that). In the opening city there are rival clans, arrogant young masters, demonic core beasts, wandering mystics, distant sects that the children will go to, and probably a few other staples of the genre as well. While nothing here is strictly new, the characters and plot engage with it in a natural and engaging way that makes me want to know more, and there's nothing wrong with a good genre fiction.

Writing Style: Reasonably engaging, with good pacing. The exposition doesn't take over too much, but at the same time action scenes are punctuated with reaction. I found myself reaching instinctually for the next chapter button as I was reading through, a good sign that the writing style had me engaged. There are some grammatical issues that cause hiccups, but thats its own section.

Story 4/5: This is a fairly early review, but I would say that the "Status Quo" and "Inciting Incident" have both happened, and I found them satisfying, and there is plenty of peril and sect joining about to happen, unless my guesses are way off. My one complaint is that the story so far has was broadly predictable: not in tiny details, but in terms of the broad strokes its pretty easy to tell what is going to happen in the scenes as soon as they start, just because they follow the tropes.

(Is the MC really going to die after heroically sacrificing herself this early in a story? No, she isn't, she's going to get a powerup because of her nobility. I don't care that I saw it coming, it was still satisfying to read.)

Characters 4/5: There are a good number of characters with distinct personalities, though as of yet none are that complex: The MC who is psychologically scarred but tries her hardest and is a bit impatient, the brother who is protective and wants to learn to be a good clan leader, the distant father who 'must' bow to the pressure of the 'shame' that the MCs weakness brings, the distant mother who is protective and strong, but puts the clan's welfare ahead of her personal desires, and a few more I won't spoil. None of these characters are especially 3 dimensional, but they aren't bad either and it can be hard to establish deep characters in just a few chapters.

The MC has undergone some character developement just in the last chapter I read that I won't spoil, but it bodes well for characters to develop in general and not remain static.

There are also antagonistic young masters obsessed with pride. Fine. It's a staple for the genre, even if they have the depth and nuance of a roadkilled armadillo. 

Grammar Score 4/5: The writing has a lot of trouble with consistent tense use in paragraphs, and that can break the immersion and flow pretty badly. There are the occasional typos in terms of spelling, but nothing that makes it unreadable.

it really only gets 4/5 because RR standards are low. That said, there's nothing here that's unfixable: a little bit of work practicing tense usage and breaking bad habits would fix up the majority of the problems.

HalfStarFiveStar
Overall

A tale of growth and perserverence, the protagonist crawling towards capability from her start in weakness.

 

Background culture is fine, seems like typical Wuxia fare, albeit with slightly less sexism. System is light as advertised, mostly just a gods-given visual medium for cultivators to track their growth, which as a westerner is more accessible than an innate sense of the strength of the self and of others.

 

The Traumatizing Content warning is for depictions of violence/verbal abuse from childhood peers, as well as dealing with and processing low self esteem/childhood trauma.