Rebirth Of Civilization

by princepablo

Warning This fiction contains:
  • Gore
  • Profanity
  • Traumatising content

Andrew suddenly finds himself alone in world that is not his own. The creatures are hostile and unfamiliar, the land around him unrecognizable. He will have to work hard to explore the wilderness he has found himself in, to unravel the ancient magics of this world, and to create a safe place for the others lost in a foreign world like himself.

This is a slow paced novel, with an early focus on discovery, survival and crafting. The slow pace is intentional as I hope to write this novel for many many chapters to come. 

This is also the first fiction I've written and I'm always working on improving my writing so all feedack is appreciated and taken into account. 

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princepablo

princepablo

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hi&hello
Overall
Style
Story
Grammar
Character

TLDR: Like plain popcorn, it's inoffensive, You'll munch on is as a snack but you aren't eating it cause of the complex flavours and it certainly won't fill you up. This story is like that, and just like plain popcorn you get tired of it after awhile. Maybe the author will sprinkle on some metaphorical salt and butter but I can't see that happening any time soon.  So it's fine to read if your bored and want crafting as a focus for a change but that's about it. (All said, I still mostly enjoyed reading it, I just tire of all the missed opportunities)

Story: The story is more nonexistent than bad. Just survival and the litRPG grind. Though to it's marrit there's more crafting than most stories but the crafting is kinda dumb. There's the occasional creative flair but most of the time you'll be frustrated by the MC ignoring the possibility's

the style is bland and sometimes redundant. I kinda wish the MC thoughts weren't written as much cause they're mostly exposition and kinda just highlight how bland he is. On the flip side, this has been great to read before bed as I have been drifting off especially well while reading it.

grammar is fine, nothing much to say about it.

charecters is... well there is one; the MC, and I've already forgotten his name. The most notible thing about him is he dropped out of collage and you can kinda see why.he bumbles about occasionally making somewhat intelligent decisions but if you're expecting an Mac to make deliberate decisions towards the goal of rebuilding civilization that's not here (not yet at least). Forget the scientific method, I'm not sure he even know's that Iron is an element. There's no real process to his expiermentation he mostly gets lucky. His work with rune's is a bit more intelligent than smithing though. You may have noticed that what I'm describing counts at most as a character flaw, not really a review of his characterisation, but that's all we got. 

That, and an overly calm "and rational" reaction to most everything. He doesn't feel emotion beyond mild annoyance as far as I can tell but if that's your thing, all the power to ya (I know a lot of people like there MC like this. Just know he'll make a tone of noise next to a rode where an ambush happened without considering it may be a bad idea...

Note: this may all change (and improve) as the story progresses, I just have limited time and patience.

Stillness
Overall

Making things doesn’t work like that

Reviewed at: Chapter 11 - Getting Stronger

What interests me most in the story are the runes and exprimenting with them. Otherwise, I'm unimpressed. 

There are three main things I dislike. 

One, hunting animals like the MC does only works in fantasy land. If any thing, I'd expect animals to be rarer and more stealthly than those on Earth, simply due to increased predation from literally everything.

Two, making things, especially things out of metal, is unrealistic. Magic allows for a lot of handwaving away of issues to the point where it isn't as big an issue, but in places where magic isn't used I have an issue with how things just don't work how they're described. 

Three, the story goes nowhere. There is no reason to care. It's just a guy gaining levels and skills alone in the woods. 

TomWrites
Overall
Style
Story
Grammar
Character

Overall: 3.5/5

There's nothing objectionable with this story, but there's also nothing notable. Excellent grammar and decent (if generic) style is pulled down hard by the very light story and lack of any characters.

Grammar 5/5:

Well edited and without errors. I have no complaints here, and compared to the usual 4.5's and 5's of rating on RR, I wish I could give it a 7.

Style 4/5:

In a word: fine. Entirely generic, but that can be comfy.

Concept and Setting Style: The setting is a generic fantasy forest with wolves and boars and a boss bear. The system is a generic levels + attributes + skill + class: not quite as basic as they come as the magic has a seperate XP track, but pretty close: you've seen it before. Character is generic Isekai only more bland than usual. The magic has runes and if you move them around you change the effects.

It does delve a little bit into crafting things using what little runes he knows, the materials available, and the power of magical wishful thinking. There hasn't been all that much developement, but I can see it becoming interesting in the future.

Writing Style: The writing style is easy to read, but also doesn't grab attention. Nothing technically wrong with it in terms of grammar, but also not much, well, style. I found myself skimming paragraphs at a time because the individual words weren't particularly interesting. The descriptions are enough to understand whats going on. Its fine.

Its not like the elements of style are bad, but there's little new to find here either.

Story 2/5:

A generic "person" who was in the woods and got transported to a somewhat depopulated fantasty world that has a generic System. By luck they witnessed a caravan get massacred and could salvage everything they needed from it. By luck they fell on top of a book of magic and was able to use the pictures to make some runes and learn how to manipulate mana. They have killed some wolves.

That short description sums up everything thats happened so far. There aren't any threats to him, not really. The only goal with any stakes he's had (find water, shelter, food) were perfectly solved in either the first or second chapter through sheer chance. There's no goals with stakes, no tension, no inciting incident, nothing. There is no story so far.

The only thing of interest is that some magical accident killed ~90% of the planets population, which is why people got grabbed and put there, and maybe what was going on with the caravan, but the MC doesn't seem particularly interested in exploring either.

Character 1.5/5: 

There has been one person so far: He was camping in the woods, played video games in the past, took a semester of Japanese, and failed out of college. He is excited by the idea of magic.

Thats it. I know nothing about his past, his views, why he was in the woods, what he wants, whether he ever had pets, what his skills or interests were, his personality etc etc... He's just a blank slate, more automaton than person, that messes around with things.

A least the MC isn't actively awful, and that count for something, but there basically aren't any characters in the story.

assasin
Overall
Style
Story
Grammar
Character

Beautiful start to a litrpg

Reviewed at: Chapter 7 - Beartrap

disclaimer; this was done as part of a review swap

The story starts of very slow but I love the premise. Too many litrpgs are focused solely on progression fantasies and ignore the fun stuff like an interesting crafting system. Plus I definitely prefer ones focused more on exploration,discovery and survival.

The grammar and vocabulary is impecable and outside of the very slow pace I see nothing wrong with the style. 

The magic system and worldbuilding is interesting enough that it doesn't come across as another generic litrpg. There's a certain je ne sais quoi that appeals to me that I think a lot of them lack. I think it's because every discovery is a real effort of sweat and, sometimes literal, blood and not just a gift from the author. 

My one complaint is the main character is very bland. But I think that can easily be addressed as the story progresses. Especially once more characters are added to the story so there's some actual character growth through dialogue and interpersonal relationships. Way too many litrpgs fall into the same trap. There's too much focus on one character in the beginning and it gets very tiresome to see the same cliche over and over again. 

 

Terozys
Overall
Style
Story
Grammar
Character

Readable, somewhat interesting story. I liked it and will continue reading, but not sure if I have enough patience. 

This story is an isekai action adventure comedy. I can describe it with just "fantasy magic sandbox litrpg" survival sandbox-is perfect description for this story. Main Character finds water and food in start of the story, so surviving is not main thing here. He just plays with runes and tries to craft things most of the time.

Story: sandbox crafting with light survival. Kind of like vanilla ice cream. When you say "typical crafting in fantasy litrpg" - you mean this. Main character doesn't have any goal. Literally just: 1. don't t die 2. craft 3. increase quality of life. 

Grammar: good and readable.

Character: not weeb or your typical isekai MainCharacter, just man with friends gone lost while camping. Not dr. Stone level of knowledge, but average national geographic + primal survival watcher

Not bad, not good. If you have spare time-read it, if not-don't. If author will not make any big twist to this story, he will lose many of his readers. I think author already wotlrking on this, because there's already a hint to new characters being introduced. But I don't have many hopes for this. 

Frost_Rune
Overall

As of chapter 11 there are some details that already need to be addressed. Such as the phone not working, like does electricity not function? This can be explained by magic interfering I guess. The main character also doesn't seem to have any remorse for the world ending. Avoiding grief is understandable but even an attempt to forget or ignore grief isn't mentioned. A lack of empathy isn't great in a main character. Even if besides this he's empathetic and normal, which makes it seem more like a plot hole. The rest of the story isn't that bad at all and rather wonderful. The world building and magic is where the story shines. The lack of any guiding hands or for shadowed b.s. tropes is also pleasant to see. Those ruin stories so easily. I think this will be a story that can only be great by sheer volume of material. Like the Azeranth Healer in a way. Just needs to steadily build itself up. Pacing is near perfect as he's struggled but enough build up. Maybe take some time to build the character itself up but not so much focus to derail the story. All in all I'm glad this is being written and look forward to wasting my free time reading it and contemplating. Good job man keep it up.

MadGod
Overall

The only mistake the author has made for this story so far is in its description. He should have just mentioned that it's a crafting focused novel and not story/charater driven and instead of casual readers complaining that it's plain, he'd have the crafting nuts drooling over it, like how it happened with Magic Smithing.

Basically, it's all about a guy in the woods bushcrafting, researching rune magic and base building, with some ocasional fighting in-between and slow leveling.  And this is all you need to know to decide whether this is the story for you not.

Don't go around downvoting stuff just because you don't like the genre.

Luis Ramon Sierra Flores
Overall

Weirdly Good. Reminds me of Chris Hetchl style

Reviewed at: Chapter 11 - Getting Stronger

Well, this is the first time that I have found so many similarities between authors.

This is a story about a crafter/warrior, the story focus 80% of the time on crafting and developing himself,15% on Fighting monster to level up,5% on the world around him.

And it just Works... somehow, now please understand this is a very niche type of novel that does not work for everyone, some people might find it boring, or too slow, there is no OP from the start MC, the MC is not a genius, he fucks up from time to time (Spoiler alert: Don't mix air with fire dumbass), and there is no grand objective so far, the MC thinking pattern is like an engineers mind, he breaks problems in steps and works his way to solve each one by one. 

Grammar is Ok!

The bad: The author needs to learn how to use Blue Boxes, or find a way to show the status that it's more friendly for the reader. He really needs to add some side characters into the story, we are at chapter 11 and so far the MC only interacts with his mind, if he is going to take this stance, then making sure the MC develops a speech problem because of his lack of talking would be a way to go.

 

I have added the story to my follow list, and I plan on staying until the end. 

Rivet
Overall

I enjoy the focus toward crafting rather than to the levels and the magic system. It gives me the same feelings as when reading Hatchet or similar stories. The pace is nice, not too fast, but with an interesting indirect magic system. There are no casting fireballs or arcane lightnings, but an indirect rune system that focuses on the materials used. Great story, and something I could easily devour 100 chapters of.

moredread
Overall

The plot is pretty basic. Guy gets pulled into another world that has a system. 

At the point im reviewing this it's still very early so the meat of the story hasn't come out yet. So far the MC hasn't had any interactions with anyone but wolves yet, but it's a lot of fun. It's just survival and crafting traps. I love these types of stories though.

Looking forward to seeing how this turns out.