Minecrafts Reality

by TheReaperKing

Warning This fiction contains:
  • Gore
  • Profanity
  • Sexual Content
  • Traumatising content

Follow Aeternum, an unlucky soul, through a world some would consider a blessing and some a curse. Robbed of his rightful afterlife, how will he make the best of his second life?

On his adventure, he will struggle against and fight the world’s monstrous denizens. He is trying to survive using creativity and what little know-how he has while trying to enjoy life a little.

Maybe, with enough effort, he will be able to escape his fate as the toy of a bored God.

-----Author-----

Thank you for checking out my light novel. I am a hobbyist writer who is still learning. I would appreciate any corrections people can make as well as constructive criticism. I hope that you enjoy the story!

I personally made the cover art with photo editing.

*edit* This story is the grinder I use to sharpen my writing skills further. Of course, I care for the story and wish to see it flourish. But, please understand that I have a long way to go to become a great author.

Current schedule: 12am, UK standard time. 9pm, central standard time. Once per day upload, excluding sunday. 

V3 courtesy of Skye

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TheReaperKing

TheReaperKing

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100,000 Views
250 Comments
Faith in the Internet
Word Count (13)
200 Followers
50 Review Upvotes
15 Reviews
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Table of Contents
Chapter Name Release Date
Chapter 1: The Art of living V2 ago
Chapter 2: Am I the barbarian V2 ago
Chapter 3: It's only up from here ago
Chapter 4: No shortcuts to mining V2 ago
Chapter 5: Screw bronze I’m in the iron age ago
Chapter 6: Farming is where it's at V2 ago
Chapter 7: One step up ago
Chapter 8: Scouting, bathing and preparing for hellfire ago
Chapter 9: Hell is hellish for sure ago
Chapter 10: Learning and fighting ago
Chapter 11: Smarter Monsters! ago
Chapter 12: I despise swamps ago
Chapter 13: The crystal cavern hides diamonds ago
Chapter 14: Enchanting, essence, and a good old inventory ago
Chapter 15: Good Gear – finally ago
Chapter 16: The journey – part 1 ago
Chapter 17: The journey – part 2 ago
Chapter 18: The journey – part 3 ago
Chapter 19: The journey – part 4 ago
Chapter 20: The Arrival ago
Chapter 21: Building and growing ago
Chapter 22: Flight, falling and building ago
Chapter 23: Flying islands are always cool ago
Chapter 24: Ender pearl drought ago
Chapter 25: At least it’s harder to kill me now. ago
Chapter 26: Very productive day ago
Chapter 27: Real Food ago
Chapter 28: Hunt for animals ago
Chapter 29: Enjoying life ago
Chapter 30: The Forest ago
Chapter 31: Random teleportation is truly random ago
Chapter 32: Progress in town ago
Chapter 33: Exploring and town defense ago
Chapter 34: Enchanting ago
Chapter 35: Witchery ago
Chapter 36: The mayor holds the keys to the city ago
Chapter 37: The resource investigator ago
Chapter 38: A peaceful day ago
Chapter 39: Boss fight ago
Chapter 40: The Meeting ago
Chapter 41: Teasing the guest ago
Chapter 42: Terror ago
Chapter 43: The Trade ago
Chapter 44: Speed build ago
Chapter 45: Speed build – Part 2 ago
Chapter 46: Speed build – Part 3 ago
Chapter 47: Rewards and a mothers caution ago
Chapter 48: Screw killing the wither ago
Chapter 49: Truly portable ago
Chapter 50: All that’s golden isn’t good ago
Chapter 51: Gigantic pains ago
Chapter 52: The coven ago
Chapter 53: Priroda ago
Chapter 54: What is it, Halloween? ago
Chapter 55: First Contact ago
Chapter 56: Demonic Deals ago
Chapter 57: Power of the world ago
The offer ago
Chapter 58: Carnival island ago
Chapter 59: The bond ago
Chapter 60: Questing ago
Chapter 61: The visitor and The Books ago
Chapter 62: A peaceful day ago
Chapter 63: The metallic abyss ago
Chapter 64: Draconium ago
Chapter 65: Time on my hands. ago
Chapter 66: Power of the wyvern ago
Chapter 67: Oops V2 ago
Chapter 68: Just life ago
Chapter 69: Rumors ago
Chapter 70: The Crimson Room ago
Chapter 71: Interviews V2 ago
Chapter 72: Final Errands ago
Mod suggestions. ago
Chapter 73: Ars Magica ago
Chapter 74: Let's kill water ago
Chapter 75: The hunt for elusive plants ago
Chapter 76: The Visiter ago
Chapter 77: Pyramid Of Old ago
Chapter 78: Damned Tarma root ago
Chapter 79: The green orbs ago
Chapter 80: Obsolete carriages. ago
Chapter 81: Power in poor hands ago
Chapter 82: Battleship ago
Chapter 83: Curios conversations ago
Chapter 84: Spicy merchant ago
Chapter 85: Kraken ago
Chapter 86: The dagger family ago
Chapter 87: Deals and Dinner ago
Chapter 88: Screw organizing ago
Chapter 89: Homegrown cult ago
Chapter 90: Cult Hideout ago
Chapter 91: Becoming a true born ago
Chapter 92: The Thirst ago
Help wanted. ago
Chapter 93: Leveling spree ago
Chapter 94: Meal for another ago
Chapter 95: Troublesome Day ago
Chapter 96: Curiosity killed the cat, literally ago
Chapter 97: Stir the beast ago
Chapter 98: The Captain ago
Chapter 99: Now, the hard part. ago
Chapter 100: The Leader ago
Chapter 101: Coaching the rooky ago
Chapter 102: Cult Arrangments ago
Chapter 103: The house of cards crumbles ago
Chapter 104: House tour ago
Chapter 105: Cult Completion ago
Chapter 106: Ore Spawns ago
Chapter 107: The meeting ago
Chapter 108: Blood above and below ago
Chapter 109: Dagger ago
Chapter 110: Accidental End ago
Chapter 111: Draconic destruction ago
Chapter 112: The slayer ago
Chapter 113: And I already need more ago
Chapter 114: I am the doctor ago
Chapter 115: Jurassic? Or somewhere else? ago
Chapter 116: Vampiric checkup and chocolate delights ago
Chapter 117: Fear chocolate, as it awakens the beast. ago
Chapter 118: The End by the book ago
Chapter 119: It hates fire! ago
Chapter 120: David and the goliath ago
Chapter 121: From fighting a goliath to building a mountain. ago
Chapter 122: Gas ago
Chapter 123: Heart ago
Chapter 124: News ago
Chapter 125: Sucked dry in the worst way possible ago
Chapter 126: Recovery and infusion ago
Chapter 127: Gluttonous beasts ago
Chapter 128: A familiar hunt. ago
Chapter 129: Rex ago
Chapter 130: How interesting ago
Chapter 131: Saving a world or damning another? ago
Chapter 132: A date ago
Chapter 133: Elven passengers and energy experimentation ago
Chapter 134: Magical experimentation ago
Chapter 135: Vampiric Fears ago
Chapter 136:  Speech ago
Chapter 137:  Thank the charm ago
Chapter 138:  The 3 fold fish ago
Chapter 139:  Bar ago
Chapter 140:  Phones ago
Chapter 141:  The start of the internet ago
Chapter 142:  Unfortunate news. ago
Chapter 143:  Journey ago
Chapter 144:  Journey 2 ago
Chapter 145:  Journey 3 ago
Chapter 146:  Journey 4 ago
Chapter 147:  Journey 5 ago
Chapter 148:  Journey 6 ago
Chapter 149:  Journey 7 ago
Chapter 150:  Journey 8 ago
Chapter 151:  Journey 9 ago
Chapter 152:  Journey 10 ago
Chapter 153:  Journey 11 ago
Chapter 154:  The capital ago

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Reviews
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Redbeastofforgottenworld
Overall

This story has a interesting plot and grammar is definitely sub par. It readable enough but will require to be rewritten and a good proof reading, it's better then many translated light novels (I mean definitely better then machine translation). I agree with both of the other reviews OL and MMM.

And MMM is not a troll, just read the synopsis anyone would understand what he meant by basic English mechanics not being sufficient, and this view would be reinforced in a few chapters. If you are upset by this kind of thing then let the author know.

In my boredom I had read far worse things, and it's a lot better than any of those.

Uh.

OBLIVION LORD
Overall

This story has a very promising start, as I generally don't like the Minecraft logic of 1 m cubic that the currently only flaw I see, but I am highly biased about that so it doesn't matter. It's going in a very good direction. World building, I'm not sure this is the correct word but after reading the 17 Ch I decided that this story is perfectly good for a 4 star rating. It starts kind of lame thou but it gets exponentially better. 

Please don't take that shitty one star review seriously that's a troll he reviewed it a 2 Ch. And about grammar I can't say much I didn't notice anything worth mentioning.

I hope author didn't get discouraged by that review.

This story is definitely worth trying.

 

TheLastScavenger
Overall

Needs grammar work to become a worthwhile story

Reviewed at: Chapter 1: The Art of living V2

Let me say this right now. I'm a glutton for books of just about any kind. I can stomach bad characters, stupid situations, nonsensical locations. What I cannot stomach however, is bad grammar. My internal auto-correct can deal with some of it, but there is a limit to what it can handle before I have to read and re-read, just to understand what's going on.

I tried to push past the first chapter, to maybe get a glimpse of the story. Didn't go well. The sentence structure is first person, that much is clear. However, it is written in a way that is... Well, hard for me to describe with a simple sentence. I'll give you an example.

Everything’s black, what on earth is going on? Wait, my eyes are closed. ‘opens eyes’ “Better,” wait?

This is literally the opening to the story, meant to instantly hook the reader. My internal auto-correct saw this and crashed. You can understand it, sure. I have never met someone who enjoys this particular style of writing, however.

I thought it might just be something the author would grow out of, so I skipped ahead to the most recent chapter to check it out, hopefully without spoiling anything. Here is the example of Chapter 52.

‘Sizzling’ turning the contents of the pan. I am truly in a good mood. Todays the day the [review: spoiler hidden] gets back; with absolutely no pushing from me.

With that example, you can see clearly that the writing style of the author is slowly being refined. However, the word choice and phrasing still makes it almost painful for me to read much further than this.

Let me say this one more time. I'm a glutton for books. I love them immensely, which is one of the reasons I chose to give this one a look. The basic premise is interesting, but I and many like me can't get through the thorny branches of your writing style without significant effort. As such, what I recommend is heavily editing each chapter as needed, until it is caught up with the most recent chapter.

I hope to be able to come back to try reading this without frying my brain.

Until then, I wish you good luck.

-TheLastScavenger

grademaster
Overall
Style
Story
Grammar
Character

A light novel, not to be taken seriously

Reviewed at: Chapter 56: Demonic Deals

I enjoy the novel, sort of. It isn't the sort of story I'd ever get sucked into and not because it's fanfiction or wish fulfillment. My issues with it lie mostly with how stagnant it can be and how little detail it has. It's more like a dry recitation of events at times than a story and it has a lot of bad habits to go along with it. So long as you go in knowing what this is, a fun, casual story with no real stress or objective, it's nice. 

First is the style. This is the highest score because for it's flaws, your story does have a distinct style to put it apart from other stories on RR. Your tactic of few details and cutting out unnecessary dialogue is, in my opinion, poorly done. It's a bit like you stripped the flesh from the story, leaving just the bare bones for readers. If you like to fill in details with an active imagination that's good but it can also be dull, again, making it a dry recitation of scenes instead of a story. 

Next is grammar, and it's bad, real bad. The dialogue is especially poor, and here's one example, which I put in brackets: ["You're not escaping, ‘grasping my shoulders.’ ‘Don’t open the soldier island he says’ before immediately letting some people play on it.” His face emotionless, but clear annoyance on his face, maybe a hint of humor as well.]. 

Something that just makes me flinch is the apostrophies seperating actions from dialogue. Misspelled words aren't uncommon and there are other sentances like this, with actions awkwardly placed into dialogue, but it could be worse. It's understandable but kind of broken. My understanding is that you're a non-English speaker, though, so don't be ashamed. It has gotten noticably better since the start of the story as well, so good ojb with that, and good luck learning further. 

Continuing on, the story, for the most part, is nonexistent. There is an overarching plot of some bored god that will eventually assign tasks to Aeternum, the MC, but it hasn't actually been put into effect yet. There was an initial arc of surviving alone, where the writing style was very effective (being alone in the wilderness can make for boredom), but past that, where Aeternum met other people and interacted with them, it's been pretty awful and I'm about to tell you why. 

It's the characters. They're so... flat. Aeternum has a little charictarization, he's generous (too generous in my opinion, to the point where it makes me groan in pain when he gives away some high end artifact to random villager number five), kind, sort of a loner, and trusting. Besides him there's the mayor, who's a greedy politician that eventually mellows out a bit and Aeternum's lackey/employee, who gets showered with gifts for relatively easy tasks. The characters are basic models of one trait or another and you don't have enough complex situations or detail to pull off archetypes in an interesting way. Maybe I'm biased because Aeternum's constant unending generosity to literally everyone around him REALLY annoys me but this is my biggest hang-up with the story. 

All that critisism said I do have to commend you on writing so much. You've come a long way with the story, and the best way to get better at writing is to keep writing. This isn't a good story but it's still one that deserves attention for the effort you've put into it. I might revisit what you write in the future to see how far you've come but for now I think I'll need to leave you be. Again, good luck. 

KaiserMoon
Overall
Style
Story
Grammar
Character

A decent story, but really hard to look at

Reviewed at: Chapter 4: No shortcuts to mining

First of all I just want to say that, I found the story, from what I could get out of it to be decent, but I kept getting dragged out of it by the many many mistakes, and weird perspective things. And I haven't read farther than chapter 4, and ther are 60 something available chapters, so the writing could improve later on.

I gave a 2.5 for style because the way some stuff is presented is just so weird, you get the feeling of "wait what did I just read" quite often. It happens pretty often too.

This ties in to the 2 star grammar score. For what its worth there aren't many spelling mistakes, its all the other mistakes. Take for example the very first 2 line of chapter 1 for example. It reads "Everything’s black, what on earth is going on? Wait, my eyes are closed. ‘opens eyes’ “Better,” wait? it’s all white now; I guess I just can't win - a great start." The fact that opens eyes, is written as such, its jaring, its weird prespective wise, and there is capitalization mistakes and everything. This is just one example of something that happens all the time, at least in the early parts.

For story I gave 3.5 stars, becasue for the most part it's decent, if not deep. The problem is that, though the story takes place in a heavily modded mincraft, it's kinda just bland. There doesn't seem to be much of an underlying goal, keep in mind that I stopped after chapter 4, and it seems to just use a bunch of cliches to get by.

Finally a 2 star character score. The protagonist and the god, the only 2 real characters we have been introduced to by chapter 4 are very flat, there isn't any real depth to them. The protagonist just accepts the jaring situation he's in much to easily, he seems to do things just because. There just doesn't seem to be any real depth.

Spirit1299
Overall

Fulfilling Minecraft fan fiction

Reviewed at: Chapter 42: Terror

The story is an excellent one with some minor fallbacks but overall it fulfills my need for a fan fiction and actually makes me want to get back into Minecraft mods.

The story can be too fast or too slow at times but I notice a quality improvement as they write more chapters I awate for the future.

MeatyMinkMilk
Overall

The basic English mechanics of the story is not up to par. While it is not completely unreadable and is significantly better than that of "My Immortal" or "Invisible Dragon", it is nevertheless not good enough for people to bother reading. As such, the writing has no value to the reader, and we are forced to give a 1 star rating.

The summary of the story is representative of the story as a whole. The amount of mechanical mistakes in the summary is the first warning that the story is not up to par. Reading the first few paragraphs of the story reinforces this warning.

Overall, we suggest that the author of the story heavily proofreads his writing. This process should be rigorous, involving googling the spelling of words, and reading up on grammar and punctuation conventions. We believe that the author lacks sufficient knowledge of such conventions, and will not be able to sufficiently edit his story without learning.

 

Seelentrinker
Overall

4 und ein halber Stern, ich möchte, dass du mehr schreibst.

Diese Bewertung wurde in deutscher Sprache verfasst und mit Google Übersetzer übersetzt. Sei sanft mit mir. 

 

Ich mag und liebe diese Geschichte für das, was sie ist. Keine ernsthafte Geschichte. Die Charaktere können sein, was sie sind. Ja, es kann manchmal etwas flach werden, aber für eine Geschichte wie diese ist das vollkommen in Ordnung. Minecraft Adventure ist für mich etwas völlig Neues und das allein verdient viele Sterne.

My wishes are my criticism. Everything would also be much more realistic. Mostly I am from the actions of nobles and cities. Well I would expect more greed about him. I mean he throws presents around like ... I don't have a suitable comparison for that. It's okay. Yes sometimes details are missing and yes the god could, if there was chaos really wanted, give him more tasks that cause a huge chaos in a very simple, simple way. Sometimes things and actions by the MC do not trigger the consequences that would normally result. Except that with God, which is a little illogical to one's own logic in history, everything else does not have to be given. It is your work my friend and I will read it anyway. Nevertheless, I will smile gratefully for each chapter and get up again at 01:30 a.m. in Germany to read the current new chapter. Damn I'm a real fan you might think and every time I read it I want to download Minecraft again.

Boristheanimal
Overall
Style
Story
Grammar
Character

Amazing if you look past the grammar

Reviewed at: Chapter 114: I am the doctor

I found this story very enjoyable (the most important aspect of a story in my opinion), but enjoyment is subjective so I will share my thoughts on it.

The world seems to be great blend between game and reality. It is realistic enough that I can imagine it like many other fantasy worlds, and yet keeps enough of the game mechanics that they can plausibly create advanced modded items (without spending the first 100 chapters bashing rocks together in a cave).

The character interactions, power levels, and emotions all seem reasonable enough. The quest's from felix add a wonderful splash of humour to the story, and much needed direction.

The only failing point's I can see is the grammar, with occasional missing or extra words. Ass well as places having similar or lacking descriptions it takes me a while to figure out the main character's location( this has only happened a couple of times however so it is not a major issue).

Personally as someone who cares little about grammar and will read machine translated novels, I believe the grammar will likely not be an issue for anyone who is not picky. The story more than makes up for grammar issues, a great read.