An Unbound Soul

by cathfach

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Note that chapters 27 onwards are currently missing, while I attempt to convince amazon that I am in fact me. Normal service will resume shortly.
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When Peter suffers a too-close encounter with a truck, he finds himself reborn in another world. At first glance it is a perfect fantasy land. There's magic to play with, elves singing in the forest and a hyperactive catgirl neighbour. There's even a System that lets him earn skills and level up. But it isn't long before he notices that the world is far too perfect. Just why is everyone so nice? Can Peter accept the alien morality of this world's self-proclaimed protector, or will he seek to overthrow her?

Set after the events of A Lonely Dungeon, a few hundred years after the rebirth of civilization, this is a story about an earthling falling in to Erryn's new world and the subsequent struggles of himself and Erryn to understand each other.

Published here, scribblehub and amazon. Two new chapters a week on Tuesdays and Fridays. Join the discord at https://discord.gg/ZxmZWhTm4e

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cathfach

cathfach

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FlowerPothead
Overall

I loved the first fiction, and am keen to see how the author will write from our isekai protagonist's POV. It's an interesting litRPG system and I'm curious to see it explored more down the line.

It's still early days, but so far I'm loving it. I feel that it's a shoe-in for trending eventually!

 

Junduffer
Overall

A good part 2 to "A Lonely Dungeon"

Reviewed at: Chapter 15: Library

This is a fantastic way to continue the story of "A Lonely Dungeon" and so far the story is holding up well as a standalone. The MC's limitations are relatable, the deadpan humor is solid, the worldbuilding is good, the progression is satisfying.

The characters feel fleshed out without the descriptions being exhausting. The exposition is blended nicely with the actual story, so it's not just an exposition dump. So far this fiction is doing great.

RedPine
Overall

Passes the "not evil" test.

Reviewed at: Chapter 39: Planning

I look for two things in stories. 1) Makes me smile, think, chuckle, and/or cry.  2) Doesnt make me feel sick afterwards due extravagant war crimes (example: Overlord, Azarinth Healer, Everybody Loves Large Chests, Warhammer 40k).

This story passes both tests. The characters are not evil, but they dont exactly agree on what it means to be good either.  This is a promising setup for interesting conflicts that dont rely on cartoonish villainy to be dramatic.

Update: due to being a new fiction with few chapters, my tentative review was 4 stars. With the consistent updates im bumping it up to 5, as the author has a good track record of finishing his stories. Objectively there are a few writing mistakes and awkwardly worded scenes, but subjectively this is easily 10 out of 5 stars.

Jordisk
Overall

Decent start, but it is early yet

Reviewed at: Chapter 5: Routine check-up

As RedPine said, this story lacks the overwhelming "Murder, Death, Kill" of many LitRPGs on this site and others. It is a little slow-going, but based on the author's previous story that will pick up.

Because of the few number of chapters, we don't have a lot of the lore built in yet, only hints. These hints are more noticable if you have read Cathfach's other story, and the prequel to thsi one, called "The Lonely Dungeon".

All in all, a decent start, and I look forward to more.

FordPerfect
Overall

So far its good.  Set up is good, world building is good.  People have logical and believable reasons for their actions.   Gonna hold off on giving it the last star until I see how good dialog is between characters, so far it has mostly been internal dialog.

Plot so far is just the setup.  Thankfully it looks like the author isn't going for an overpowered protagonist.

Waffle(est)
Overall
Style
Story
Grammar
Character

A nice, gentle fantasy novel

Reviewed at: Chapter 30: Delvers Guild

.. with only complete mind control to enforce it! Nothing serious, I promise! :)

This is a very curious novel in that depending on if you have read "A Lonely Dungeon" You will likely have a very different gut reaction to what is happening. Regardless there's satisfaction to be had both ways.

Without prior context you get to quake in your boots and figure out a mind control mystery. It's scary how oblivious everybody is and how they are incapable of (by force!) understanding your common sense. 

But knowing all about Erryn it's a totally carefree utopia with a a system admin rooting for you. And You will basically be giggling waiting for what sort of nonsense will happen once she makes direct contact with MC.

I would best describe it as a slice of life novel, but with a slow transition to more traditional adventuring. There is overarching plot though, so it's not just a feel-good read. Significant developments are afoot and the MC is slowly being drawn in.

The characters are distinc and interesting with relatable motivations and feelings. Most of them act kind of oblivious at times, but In the context of explicit mind altering magic at play the types of deviations make perfect sense. Overally everybody behaves in a consistent manner to their character and circumstances which is good to see.

There are no glaring grammar issues or awkward sentence structures that I have spotted so far (though I can kind of read over them at times, so grain of salt and all that).

42offside
Overall
Style
Story
Grammar
Character

This is the story that, of all that I follow, I most look forward to updates of.

The spelling and grammar are so good that I don't notice it, the characters are believable (and cute) and the dramatic tension never entirely lets up. The plot advances steadily despite the improbably young age of the MC. The action scenes are playground oriented, with his other friends in the village. And if the existential dread intrudes too much, a flying tackle hug is always the right answer.

And if the early childhood development isn't quite persnickety with what I'm familiar with, that's a minor flaw at worse. The exploration of a new interesting world with strange and sometimes seemingly nonsensical rules takes center stage.

This is a litrpg isekai story, with the protagonist bring essential someone from our world of born in another. Unlike other litrpg style stories, this one actually has an in-universe explaination for why the system exists, and I look forward to our unwilling but curious protagonist gradually unraveling the mystery.

Read the prequel for spoilers if you desire. I found this story by following the link at the end of the prequel, so I didn't get that choice. Certainly hasn't ruined the story for me, but your results may vary.

 

WhiteBirdy
Overall

I'm trash for isekai, so heck it, five stars

Reviewed at: Chapter 1: Babies suck

There's only 1 chapter, and it seems like a standard isekai, but since I know this is set in the lonely dungeon world, well, I am very excited to see Peter explore (and ruin) the perfect world Erryn has made. 

I hope you'll go fast over the baby years though. It's always cute to read about the bonding between a baby and its parents, but it's been done a lot.

ZebulonTheCat
Overall

Stories can tell you more that they say and ask questions without them even being written, and often times without the author intending as such (although I don't know if that is the case for this story). This story is one of my favorites because it made me question my own understanding of morality and philosophy, and it is rare that I find a story that manages to do so to my satisfaction. This story managed to make me think on the importance of free will, benevolence and other concepts that I don't know how to describe. 

tldr; This story is good.

BedlessSleeper
Overall

Its great, and it will only get better from here

Reviewed at: Chapter 30: Delvers Guild

tl;dr: Solid start, the future beholds greatness.

I noticed a few people gave talked about the start being boring or because they didn't think it was that unique or very special. The thing is with these kinds of stories, the beginning is usually just a blindfold covering our eyes, and it just takes time for the showman to build up his act so that once he takes the blindfold off, we would be truly shocked. There's already been a revelation in the inner workings of the current world, which changed the entire perception of the story. Won't spoil it, but it's all uphill from here.