--FIRST DRAFT WARNING: EDITS WILL BE MADE--
As the perfect child - Kyra knew she was the main character™. Perfect grades, mastery over any activity whatsoever - piano, debate, soccer - you name it!
But when a leveling system hijacks Earth, she is nothing but 1 of 7,000,000,000. She didn't win the lottery. Her average-joe best friend Marc did.
Of course she isn't going to back down - but how can Kyra get stronger? If she can't do it regularly, she's going to have to become a rule breaker. An irregular path, beginning from a level 1 nobody.
Seriously, when was she going to become the main character™ again?
[Work in Progress! (Small changes will be made to chapters from time to time :D)]
[Participant in the Royal Road Writathon Challenge]
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Just wanted to say author, I like the flow of this so far and it makes sense how you rolled out things between Marc and Kyra. Especially since Marc got isolated in a dungeon with no real contact it seems and forced to level. Then Kyra has a complex and so always pushes herself to be better than those around her. How she reacts when Marc 'shows off' feels legit!
I'm a bit bothered by the current high rating. The story is very basic, the language is less than basic, the characters are flat. Oh, and it is not that interesting.
Kyra panted, dropping to the ground once more as she noticed her health bar dropping to a mere 5/33. A sudden jolt of realization hit her as she realized she didn't know how fast her health would regenerate.
This is the beginning of chapter 10 or 11. Otherwise the tenses jump merrily with the past being the mainstay, there are spelling issues like dosing and biding (dozing, bidding) and there are logical mistakes - see the explanation of becoming a hero vs winning the lottery.
It all feels very young adult, I hope there will be some relationship angst at least...
Another system apocalypse novel joins the Fray!
The protagonist Kyra, as the synopsis promises, is naturally gifted. But she soon finds out that her skills are no match for the System. To add insult to injury, her dweeby, gamer friend suddenly is super powerful because of shenanigans, chosen by the God of Fire to be a hero.
She decides to soothe her wounded feelings by striking a deal with the nefarious figure "Tiny", who gives her a chance to also get crazy system powers
The novel isn't there yet, but I'm going to call it here right here, right now:
50 bucks that the dramatic reveals is that Tiny is short for 'Des'Tiny.
The grammar has no issues. Characters are a little one dimensional, and could use some more work. The story premise and style are interesting enough, but could benefit from more worldbuilding and fleshing out.
In particular, the friends sudden powerleveling works fine as a plot device, but it leaves a lot of questions unanswered about the influence of the gods of the setting on the system. Later, there's a run in with another mysterious disciple lady, but there's not much fleshing out of the interaction.
Especially since the arc of the story seems to be that Kyra is going to become super OP and wreck all of the lucky individuals who were chosen by the Gods first time around, It would be nice to have a clearer idea of who she's fighting against, and what the stakes are. Instead, we have so many enemies and forces that seem to just be fodder for her Mary Sue powers.
The characters are unique... ish. They haven't yet been given the opportunity to shine, but given the rest of the story, I'm sure they will shine.
The characters seem kinda cliche, but what characters don't at the beginning of a story? It always helps to set up characters with cliches and build them from there.
You can see the main conflict of the story miles away, but that's not necessarily a bad thing, as the resolution is still up in the air.
Though I could be wrong, and her being 'irregular' won't cause her to be targeted by the 'heroes' and her bestfreind, leading to all sorts of shenanigans.
Grammar's fine. You can read it without any real problems, and that's more than some novels on this site.
Story's a bit grindy, but look at me, I'm litrpg101, that's never turned me off of a story before. But really, if you don't like grinding, eh, you might want to skim some parts.
Also, not many character interactions. Probably a design choice, but I felt the need to point it out.
All around, not a bad read. Definetly better than some of the stories on this site. It's always a plus when a story has direction and is legible. If the author updates regularly, then this novel will get on trending easyly.