The Fate of a villain (But not really)

The Fate of a villain (But not really)

by cielthree

Warning This fiction contains:
  • Gore
  • Profanity
  • Sexual Content

And in all fairness, he's a walking, talking red flag. With neither the talent for magic, nor the constitution for swords, he opted for the one weapon he knew by heart. A gun, gifted to him by his (now) ex-girlfriend. Taking over the body of a dying boy, he lives out his days, slowing working towards the ultimate end that either sees himself dead, or the rest of the world exterminated. But for now, he has time to kill.

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NOTE: CONTAINS CROSSDRESSING, LGBT ELEMENTS

It starts off really slowly, so take your time

Word counts per chapter part from 1000-1500

Photo by Dorothe form PxHere

Releases twice weekly(?)

Thank you for your support!

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cielthree

cielthree

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Table of Contents
119 Chapters
Chapter Name Release Date
1 - Regarding reincarnation ago
2 - Deal ago
3 - And nothing particular to speak of. ago
4 - Good morning, teacher ago
5 - Princess ago
6 - An Outing ago
7 - A gift ago
8 - Sister, Sister ago
9 - Hunters Festival (Part 1) ago
10 - Hunters Festival (Part 2) ago
11 - Arcleus ago
12 - Meeting the final one ago
13 - Something close to assault, perhaps ago
14 - Beyond a certain boundary, with a touch of alcohol ago
15 - Unless... ago
16 - Spying, an essential act ago
17 - New Arrivals ago
18 - Interviews, or just another day ago
19 - Sickly Sweet. ago
20 - Standoff ago
21 - Good Evening, and how are you? ago
22 - The night ago
23 - Interlude I ago
24 - Dragon Hunt I / Kidnapping I ago
25 - Rescue Mission (Haein) I / Rescue Attempt (Estelle) I ago
26 - Dragon Hunt II / Kidnapping II ago
27 - Dragon Hunt III / Kidnapping III ago
28 - Rescue Attempt II / Dragon Hunt III ago
29 - Rescue Mission II / Kidnapping IV ago
30 - Dragon's Search / Identity Crisis ago
31 - Regrouping / Hot Potato ago
32 - Hot Potato II ago
33 - Reunion ago
34 - The Hero's Prologue ago
35 - Reunion II ago
36 - A small intermission ago
37 - Scarlet Invitation I ago
38 - Scarlet Invitation II ago
39 - Scarlet Invitation III (Iris) ago
40 - Scarlet Invitation IV ago
41 - Handling diplomacy ago
42 - Occultic Whispers ago
43 - Questions & Answers ago
44 - A murder in the scarlet house ago
45 - A murder in the scarlet house II ago
46 - Kicking down heaven's door ago
47 - Bahamut's grace ago
48 - A crash course in magic ago
49 - Revelations ago
50 - Leads ago
51 - Trials I ago
52 - Soul Searching ago
53 - Commence Operation ago
54 - Horrible mistakes were made ago
55 - Mistakes ago
56 - The Dark Room ago
57 - Murder ago
58 - Confusion ago
59 - Catch up ago
60 - Time passed in a blink of an eye ago
61 - Return of Iris ago
62 - Arms Race ago
63 - Birth of a demonic tyrant ago
64 - Long Telegram ago
65 - Guns and poker ago
66 - The Saint and Prosecution ago
67 - Casus Belli ago
68 - On War ago
69 - Calm before the storm ago
70.1 - Dubious Deals ago
70.2 - Dubious Deals ago
71.1 - Passerine ago
71.2 - Passerine ago
72.1 - Accusations ago
72.2 - Walls ago
73.1 - Ensnare ago
73.2 - Trap ago
74.1 - Ceasefire ago
74.2 - Prince ago
75.1 - Foreigner ago
75.2 - Cycle's End ago
76.1 - Archaic Laws ago
76.2 - Of Scandals and PR ago
77.1 - Pentinence ago
77.2 - Pentinence ago
78.1 - Library (Inside) ago
78.2 - Library (Outside) ago
79.1 - A dream of murder ago
79.2 - Origins ago
80.1 - Cracking ago
80.2 - An explanation, and then some ago
81.1 - To Kill a God? ago
81.2 - Genocide ago
82.1 - The Way Home ago
82.2 - Mission to Murder ago
83.1 - Global Warming ago
83.2 - City of Magic ago
84.1 - Invasion ago
84.2 - Relations ago
85.1 - Limβurs ago
85.2 - Infatuation ago
86.1 - Interruption ago
86.2 - Pursuit ago
87 - A Brief Thesis on Magic ago
88.1 - Demon ago
88.2 - (Re)Group ago
89.1 - Trigonometry! ago
89.2 - Conspiracy Theories ago
90.1 - Digging Down ago
90.2 - Chasing the Tail of the Dragon ago
91.1 - Sylvana, the Elf ago
[Rewritten] Chapter 1.1 - Beginnings ago
91.2 - The Walking Nuke + Notice ago
[Rewritten] Chapter 1.2 - Beginnings ago
[Rewritten] Chapter 2.1 - Beginnings ago
[Rewritten] Chapter 2.2 - Beginnings ago
[Rewritten] Chapter 3.1 - Beginnings ago
[Rewritten] Chapter 3.2 - Beginnings ago
[Rewritten] Chapter 4.1 - Drugs ago

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TheNameOfTheWind
Overall
Style
Story
Grammar
Character

A lot of people will presumably like this story.

Reviewed at: 24 - Dragon Hunt I / Kidnapping I

I was very conflicted whether I should write a review or not. Espesially when it is the first review. But here I am, so sorry in advance, because I suck at sugar-coating.

Let's start with the story, because that is what people primarily come looking for when they start reading a novel. The story starts with the whole: "waking up in another body" -thing, which is very well-written. We "the readers" learn that the Main Character (MC) was a normal dude from our world, and now is in a body of a bad-mannered, presumptuous son of a duke.

While this is the start of the story, it does not really tell the reader with certainty what the story is gonna be about, but I as a reader, thought the story was gonna be about how he escape the whole "villian" -role, but I was sorely mistaken. 

So what is the story about? I still don't know.. It was only the servants and knights that hated him, and that's that. Why the knights hate him, when he has never interacted with them is never really explained, the best explanation is that they all hate his father and family which ofcourse includes him, but that raises the question: "why would anybody swear loyalty to somebody they hate?" I mean, if the MC family was a small poor baron, then it would make sense that less-talented people would aply for a job at the only place it is posible for them, even if they hate their employer, and the poor baron wouldn't have the money to only take the best and most loyal. But that is very much not the case here.

Since I have no ideƩr regarding what the plot or story is about, I can't really review it, so right in the middle 2,5.

Characters 

Characters are what shape the story, and in my eyes at least, the most important part of a novel.

As I said before, the story start with MC being just a normal dude in a son of a dukes body, which is were we "all the readers" (again) was sorely mistaken. The MC is apparently not just a dude, or a brutich bullly, he is almost the opposite, he is very feminine and weak trap. This is first revealed around chapter 11.

I believe the meme "It's a trap" sums the whole novel up pretty well actually. Maybe I should have used that as a review title instead.. Nahh.

The princess and holy-knight charakters are amazingly written, really good work there. The princess has a complicated but clear personality with a motive and goal, while the holy-knight fall in line with the more simple but understandable characters like the MC father and sisters. The MC sisters personalities are not very defined, since they have so little "screen time", but what is shown, is shown well.

Why the female knight hate/hated the MC is never really explained, and that kind of sums up 80% of her character, so can't really say that i think she is very well written. And I have totally forgotten everything about the MC mother, so she either ain't that memorable, or I am very forgetful. 

I don't think a strategic general genius would repeatedly act only on emotions and against all facts. I mean, humans do crazy things for love, especially in the heat of the moment, but we don't lose all coherent reasoning, or that is at least what I believe. I can be wrong, I am not all-knowing.

Style

Some would say that the writing-style is the most important part of a novel, but I would disagree.

The most important part of "style" is to me that the author: "show don't tell" and I believe that the author of this story has understood that very well. So props for that, not many authors can do that :)

the only problem I have with the style, is that there times where I as a reader really would have liked to see things from another person's perspective, and times where i believed it to be extremely unnecessary to see the same scene again from another person's perspective. But I think that is a matter of opinion, or perspective ;)

Grammar

The grammar is fine. Small mistakes here and there, but overall fine.

DrakoRem
Overall
Style
Story
Grammar
Character

A well written but a bit generic book

Reviewed at: 4 - Good morning, teacher

Before we start, I want to say that this review is subjective and before judging the book, give it a try, I'll try to be constructive and give you some suggestions that, I hope, will help you.

Style: let's start here, it's well written and it's easy to follow, it's what you would call a light novel, through and through. The descriptions are good and the writing style is okay, why I've removed half star? Well, because the author has the habit to break a sentence that was perfectly fine and make it weird to read, here's an example: "They had a suit looking outfit, with black over white. They all had the same outfit, the blue mantle and a steel plate covered the right shoulder." I'd suggest making this kind of sentence into one more structured sentence, like: "They all had the same outfit, a suit looking outfit, black over white with the blue mantle and a steel plate covered the right shoulder." 

Grammar: Generally speaking, it is well written, but unfortunately many small mistakes could sour the experience. There are many missing words and unfinished sentences, for example: "Very then, my lord." or "Do you want to guide you there." There are quite a few missed words, I'd suggest you get an editor or a proofreader, you don't need professionals, you can just ask some friends or readers to do it.

Story: Be prepared, it's a slow-pace narration, where a whole chapter could go with just a few scenes and very little information provided, probable 10 years ago when I was wet behind ears, I would like this story more, but now, well I look at things differently, first and the biggest issue for me is that there's no hook! Nothing makes me excited about continuing reading, we don't know where the story goes to, we don't have any hidden plots, twists, or cliffhangers, things just happen and each chapter just describes an event, that's it. I'd suggest you maybe rewrite the first few chapters a bit, reintroduce the feeling of urgency, it'll add more dynamic to the story.

Character: The secondary characters are quite well written, you have their descriptions, sometimes motivation for their behavior and actions, so I would say that things are okay here. But when we talk about the main character, well, there's nothing to talk about, it's a blank, we know nothing about him, nothing at all, and I'd say that the MC (main character) is one of the most important parts of the story! He's a soul that transmigrated into the body of a son of a Duke. Who was he before, what did he do on Earth? No one knows, and I believe that's the very reason why the MC is shallow and unrelatable, because his past self would influence and define the current self, so without the background, we have a kid who acts suspiciously around his parents without being questioned does things in a way that everyone should understand that he's an impostor, but for whatever reason don't. And the MC, despite being called an impostor, doesn't act like one, he doesn't try to hide his identity as an impostor at all, that makes it weird for me, but okay. So, I'd suggest that you give the MC a background at the start of the book, you don't need to write everything at once, but when he's overly polite you could just write a small explanation about his previous life, so we know why he acts that way, we know nothing about motivation, becoming a villain? He thought about it a brief moment, and nothing else, no action plan, no ideas, no deadline, he basically can do something bad before daying and fulfill the agreement of being a villain, and I don't want to wait that long.

At the end of the day, if you're looking for something light to pass the time, or if you're a fan of those mass-produced Japanese light novels, give it a try.

majorsilver99
Overall

I am definitely having fun reading this and I find the writing style easy to digest. The changes in perspective can be slightly confusing, but since it is written in third person it is easy to catch on.

This is my first review so I probably don't know what I am doing but I hope someone finds this helpful.