Kernstalion
by Carrarn
- Profanity
One release per week [Hiatus in November due to NaNoWriMo]
[Changed the Summary based on reader feedback. Thanks guys!]
When Mitchel gets a birthday gift from his girlfriend Sandra - a pre-order version of the newest VR game, he is thrilled. Real-life graphics, full-body senses, and a mysterious world that nobody knows anything about seem like a great way to escape real-life for a few months or longer.
Two days later, his dreams of a pleasant pastime are shattered. After meeting a rude welcome-NPC, getting a weak starting body, and having a near-death experience, he finds himself sleeping on the ground, cold and filthy. Unable to log-out, he now has frightening dreams where the tutorial-AI is walking around in his body plotting Earth's conquest. If that isn't enough, he slowly realizes that the game might not actually be a game but that he could very well be in another world.
Can Mitchel find out what is going on and where Sandra is? Can he regain his own body, and would he still want to when all is said and done?
[The Story]
What this story is: A LitRPG, portal-like, slow-moving story with a protagonist who has to balance crafting and 'magic' to survive. The books have a pre-thought-out plot and finish. Also, the world is harsh, and things don't always go the MC's way.
What it is not: A drama, romance, grimdark, although these elements might appear.
I've had some feedback that the intro seems to set up a very rough life for the MC. There is a reason for this, and I hope you give it a try beyond the first few chapters. Do note, this is not an unreasonably harsh novel.
- Overall Score
- Style Score
- Story Score
- Grammar Score
- Character Score
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High Quality
Reviewed at: Chapter 35 - Makeshift armor
This is one of those few stories where I struggle to find anything to complain about, as I read this I pointed out in comments some things that could potentially have become plot holes, but the author seemed to have planned for all of it! (e.g. there are no glaring issues with the plot)
The style is great, it's just simple first person, there are no POV breaks insofar which is fantastic in my opinion, and I mean yeah, the author found something that works for him and has stuck to it.
Haven't seen any issues with theg rammar really, only reason I'm not giving it a 5/5 in this area is because my senses to grammar mistakes are severely dulled after years of reading webfiction of lower quality... (This means, expect mistakes, just not truly serious ones; the author knows proper english at least, that's all you can ever trust in when I give a good grammar rating)
The characters are good, I only gave them 4 stars because I've seen better, but I would say the characters are more like 2.5 dimensional than 3 dimensional. What I'm trying to say is the characters are simple, but distinctive from one another. It works. Which is more than can be said for most webnovels which all seem to use the same 3 character templates for about 90% of all characters. At least the characters here have their own backstories and circumstances, and you often get glimpses into these backstories and circumstances, without going into entire side chapters or interludes that drag down the pacing, which is fantastic.
The worldbuilding is really there, again similar to the characters it's rather simple worldbuilding, he does some special things that I haven't seen before, but there's nothing too extravagant here, he tries to differentiate the world from other generic worlds by having different races and creatures than most stories (e.g. he doesn't just copy paste all the races and creatures, at least not from an obvious source, which is a fairly nice touch, especially since he properly explains all the ones that are relevant; as they become relevant.)
Reason I give the story a 5/5 however, is that with all these previous elements combined creating a solid foundation, and a clearly apparent main plot from very early on in the story, the key element that's missing in a lot of webnovels, this story has a starting point, and a visible potential end point right from the beginning. So combined this all sets us up for a completely solid and well put together story.
A story this solid is quite rare among webnovels, which is why I call it high quality, but the best thing about this story, and something that sets it apart from 99.9999% of other webnovels, is that it actually has GOOD PACING!!! the plot is constantly progressing at a steady pace, it has intense parts, and calm parts spaced nicely apart, so far it hasn't felt like a single chapter was some kind of "filler". This is what really marks this story as high quality, good pacing is something that in my opinion separates wheat from chaff in regards to authors. Authors capable of setting up and maintaing good pacing, and a constant sense of plot progression, those are the ones to keep an eye on. And this, at least up till this point in the story, appears to be exactly such an author!
Overall this has been a very enjoyable reading experience, and I excitedly await the next chapter (not because of cliffhangers, this is not one of those authors apparently, but because I simply enjoy reading this!)
It truly surprises me that a story of this caliber seems to be going under the radar, I mean it has all the elements that are popular in stories on the webnovel scene, it's litrpg, it's an isekai, it's a fantasy, it's got magic, it checks all the boxes! Yet somehow people aren't noticing this story, but oh well, it truly is their loss! Because this one's a keeper :)
Harsh & Dark
Reviewed at: Chapter 2 - Step two: pick a profession
Well written, but heading towards a dark, hardcore premise. Almost seems Grimdark.
I'm getting Ready Player One vibes. But like he legit stuck in one of the loyalty centers. And it seems like he set up to fail.
I'm sure it is a good story for those that like this style so hopefully someone reviews it properly that likes the darker style of this genre.
I wanna keep reading! Chapter 52.
Reviewed at: Chapter 52 - Gurossa
It's a good story so far. The worldbuilding is slow paced but always growing and until now, I liked all that I read. All has its sparks of originality.
The beginning is a bit confused, because the system is a little fuzzy. The character responsible by introducing the world is very annoying and the experience to readers is similiary hard as it's to the MC, but after we learn what is happening (still in the initial chapters) everything makes sense.
The main reason I give 4.5, not five, it's the system. It is not very important so far and I think if there is no RPG system, the story maybe will be better. It is complex, but more confuse than interesting. There is no reference of stats in others chars to put some perspective, so this informations are there just to put the text in LitRPG genre.
Though the critics I like a lot of many elements of story: the chars, the races, the gods, the creatures and scenaries. I wish that the author can keep writing and evolving the world, introducing new chars and bring back some of that already presented.
---------------- SPOILER----------------
I like the MC, he is inteligent, but not so to prevent him to do some mistakes. He becomes strong (get powers) fast, but the level of the threats grows up together keeping the reading interisting. His body has four arms and he learning how to use them in smart forms. The principle of magic (made using hand seals) is also good. He uses life magic to control plants and combines this with his class that allows to imbue spirts in constructs and I'd liked how he uses his powers so far. I hope that the pace of story keep going how it is, not so fast.
Spoilers, read at you own risk. read the story tho
Reviewed at: Quick update- not a chapter
This was grate, and did lark just sorta disappear after the ocean battle? Also what happened to the eggs and the soul bound silver dracosep queen? Plus his squirrely space manager let extras into Est's head space did Rathaca just clear it all up? Trying to be constructive not destructive by drawing attention to these things, I'm aware these things will probably be addressed in a later book or revised.I read the whole thing in three day's, I had to finish it. Est was not overly powerful either considering he was still dangerously outclassed towards the end you have him at a good balance, he had to work for everything often paying for advancement with physical pain and mental anguish. Yet you kept him from drowning in angst, good work and good luck.
LitRPG that isn't in your face
Reviewed at: Chapter 23 - Choices and consequences
Reviewed at Chapter 23.
I like how the author has been slowly introducing their system and character build as the story advances instead of all at once in a data dump fest. The story progression is a little more natural.
The author does suffer from modern kid's problem with spelling homonyms. They obviously know the word, type it in how it sounds, and let a spellchecker create the word without verifying the meaning of the now badly misspelled butchering of the english language. Aside from ejecting me from the storyline, I'm amused at all of the homonyms that I never even knew existed.
Overall, I am looking forward to more of the story development. It will be interesting to see if the author will develop some more followers to give this story the broader audience that it deserves.
I don't give advanced reviews that often and now I am unable to submit this review because it needs to be at least 200 words long, so rather that provide pithy commentary on the VR module update mechanic found in the first chapter, (really an arm module? at least that's a first for me....) and the lack of clear mechanism for the ego transfer of proposed main nemesis, I'll just pad my review here with more fluff.
End of the day, read this story, it doesn't disappoint.
Not a grim-dark
Reviewed at: Chapter 33 - Welcome to the Howling Forest
This story is set in a world that on first glance screams grimdark, but is actually quite light. I has many points with dark subjects, but it doesn't dwell on them long, and maintains a swift pace throughout.
Style: a standard litrpg set in a grim world, but still fast paced, as I said above.
Story: well thought-out and fast paced. Largely focused on progression, though the author has indicated that that will change soon.
Grammar: I have found no errors so far, a feat as I usually find at least a couple iffy words and such, but the structure seems to let my mind glide right over any problems.
Character: not the most deep and thought provoking characters I've ever seen, but they still have enough detail and uniqueness to standout.
Filler filler filler filler filler filler filler filler filler filler filler filler filler filler filler filler filler filler filler filler filler filler filler filler filler filler filler filler filler filler filler filler filler filler filler filler filler filler filler filler filler filler filler filler filler filler filler filler filler filler filler filler filler filler filler filler filler filler filler filler filler filler filler filler filler filler filler filler filler filler filler filler filler filler filler filler filler filler filler filler
Solid story with interesting plot
Reviewed at: Book 2 - chapter 44 - Change of plans
This book has a nice flow and plot. Its kind of litrpg lite.. which is nice as pages of stats are not cluttering up the story to much, just tracking the progress.
The MC isn't looting all the time for upgrades, he is crafting his way to victory. Which is an interesting path.
The character is not instant OP victory which is also nice.
It is a solid work, thanks for sharing.
Why isnt this on top rated
Reviewed at: Book 2 - chapter 20 - Toil and trouble
i really enjoy the plot of the story alot, its a unique take on the generic "hero saves world" and the lit rpg system is really uniue as well, its much more realistic than most litrpg and i never feel that the mc is too op. he has to think and struggle to fight what he cant and what he can fight are still note worthy for the most part.
The grammer and is kinda iffy early on but the quality of it improves significantly later on. overall, pretty good grammer and not many typos.
the plot of the story is kinda boring early on but TRUST ME, it gets really good when he meets a deity. the first part of the story is him getting used to the new world hes in and getting stronger. i would go further but i dont want to give to many spoilers so you'll just have to read to find out!
i really like est's character, the others are well written most of the time but the purpose they serve is kinda bland most of the time, its mostly "i like you because you saved my ass from that monster and now were traveling together" or "you want me dead so ill stay away from you".
i might edit this later as this fantastic story comes out more.
Wonderfully fleshed out LitRPG
Reviewed at: Not a chapter 2
I'm really enjoying this story. There are some minor problems with spelling/grammar as the author is not a native english speaker, but none are so problematic as to ruin the reading experience. The flow is not interrupted, and the author is responsive to corrections and critique.
More importantly, the characterization and pacing are both great, at least from my perspective. There is minor conflict and fighting monsters in the early chapters, but most of the early story is the MC establishing his foundations and learning about the world. World building is usually snuck in, not belabored, and the info dumps that do appear are usually conversations, not narration.
Sometimes the stakes are low, sometimes high. Kernstalion, the other world, is replete with dangerous monsters, but also towns of people just trying to get by with their lives. It's not until fairly far into the story that you find a lot of people in opposition to one another, but it turns out that's more because he starts out in a backwater than a feature of the world. Most of the action takes place away from towns, while those bastions of civilization generally serve as respites. It's a well-balanced story of learning and fighting, but the focus will vacillate back and forth.
In terms of the guts of the story, you get a bit of everything, sometimes Mitchel/Est is alone, sometimes with allies, but the narration is all from Mitchel's perspective. Every character has their own motivations influenced by their pasts and goals. The other early characters are mostly friendly, but you find they all want something of different kinds from the MC. MCl is relatable, particularly for those I expect are the average audience of RR. I wouldn't characterize it as a weakness, but he's a known quanity, enjoys everything gaming, devoted to his girlfriend, standing up for right when he can.
He is thrust into an adventure through a confluence of luck (or misfortune if you like) and the machinations of deities, and despite this somehow maintains his agency, neither succumbing to the wills of gods, nor other inhabitants of the world (though he might just be fooled).
The "great system" that often appears in a litRPG is not in your face. It's integrated into the world, and all the characters are aware of it, sometimes how to game it, but you won't be reading a wall of stats and skills every chapter, just the occasional update. Furthermore, any grinding is handled elegantly with enough attention paid it without overwhelming.
Read this story, or you should regret it!
Pretty Cool
Reviewed at: Chapter 1 - Step one: Select a race
I just started reading your story and I'm really liking it so far. Lit Rpg is where it's at! It's got the kind of adventure I'm looking for. It's the kind of genre I like writing as well. I am looking forward to going through the whole thing and fleshing out a comprehensive reivew soon.