The White Horde

The White Horde

by David Talon

Warning This fiction contains:
  • Gore
  • Traumatising content

[participant in the Royal Road Writathon challenge] Game of Thrones meets Attila the Hun. Set in an alternate Earth where magic is slowly fading and decadent empires must stand or fall against the barbarian hordes pushing west, this epic tale is told from the view points of three different people:

Amazonia, a female gladiator who gains her freedom at the cost of a cursed Rune sword, and a mission to save the Empire of the East from destruction at the hands of the Sasnayam empire.

Blood-Wysper, a Celtic priestess stolen by the Shadow-walker Ghostdog for the High Priest of the Sasnayam god Yun-Kax. A young woman with a mana node inside her like a second heart that regrows each time she is 'sacrificed', driving her to the edge of madness.

Greywolf, son of Ghostdog and Asena, known as the Wolf-mother and once considered a goddess of war. a young man Asena considers scarcely more than a boy, Greywolf's actions will cause Blood-Wysper to lose her life unless he can save her, risking his freedom or his death at the hands of the high priest, Muzen.

Empires will shatter and new ones arise, and all because of the power of the White Horde.

  • Overall Score
  • Style Score
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Author
David Talon

David Talon

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Royal Writathon October 2020 winner
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Table of Contents
90 Chapters
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Sub-title: ...Do A complex magic pact that can warp the very core of your being, as they say.

- Style:

The style is simple and efficient, describing just what is needed. It’s not starved for details, as some stories can be, nor lose itself in pompous description extending like some swamp.

As for description vs dialogue, so far, the mix of the two is balanced, without one side having the upper hand on the other.

4.5 out of 5

 

- Grammar:

Nothing to say

5 out of 5

 

- Story:

The setting that is built right from the start of the first chapter is heavily inspired by Antiquity and, in particular, the Roman Empire and all the other societies that revolved around.

This very solid foundation gave birth to a simple story (anyone could dissect and discovery the simple trope used here) yet a powerful one, because it’s grounded and built from the base to the top without holes.

5+ out of 5

 

- Characters:

There are numerous characters, even just at the start of the story, which diminishes what I will call their “screen time” but each is a true little jewel that shines when the spotlight falls upon them.

4.5 out of 5

 

- Overall:

Energetic, full of potential and hooking, The White Horde is a novel whose foundations are powerful, and each step built over it are well-planned, with a great cast at its heart, bizarre, old magic that gives it an exotic feeling, and a clear quest to drive the whole thing forward.

5 out of 5

 

- Stray thoughts :

I really like the “Antiquity Period” inspiration of the first chapter.

Very hooking.

I’m doing a ton of review swap and finding way too many good novels to read XD

The characters are very likeable imo ^w^

Urgh, my heart.