Twilight The Return of Lycans

by ScientistX

Fan Fiction ONGOING Historical Romance Sci-fi Tragedy Harem Male Lead Martial Arts Non-Human lead Reincarnation Strong Lead Supernatural
Warning This fiction contains:
  • Gore
  • Profanity
  • Sexual Content

The Lycans are dead or are they???

 

Twilight world is much larger than any thought and here is the true extent of Twilight world and Return of Lycans

  • Overall Score
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  • Total Views :
  • 450
  • Average Views :
  • 56
  • Followers :
  • 7
  • Favorites :
  • 2
  • Ratings :
  • 2
  • Pages :
  • 30
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ScientistX

ScientistX

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Sin of Wrath
Overall

Not worth your time

Reviewed at: The Void

The spag, sentence structure and style is so bad an 8 yr old would write it better. Not worth anyone's time, the author doesn't even attempt to write properly.

Example: I went to the park don't ask why I won't tell you I saw friend playing football I kick ball then he started crying why is he crying it doesn't even hurt ok moving on I went home and slept

Next day I woke up are breakfast then go school (etc)

S_k_y
Overall

Show don't Tell, on steroids.

Reviewed at: The Plan

Alright, this seemed like an interesting story/idea. But the author suffered a worldbuild stroke. 

Do not get me wrong. I LOVE a detail story building. But I want to be inturduced to it slowly, to be given time to explore it. 

In contrast this felt like I was reading a report, rather than some work of fantasy. 

So my advice to the author would be this: Do not be afraid to leave your readers somewhat ignorant. Let us explore and traverse the world your mind forged.Insted of throwing everything you created at me at once. I do not need to know how a sperm works in werewolfs to understand what they are.

 

I hope you do not find my words harsh, rather I hope you improve and one day get the chance to do your worldbuilding a justice it deserves. 

 

PS: I gave it 5/5 rating just so the author doesn't think I am some asshole who likes to shit on other people's work.