The Perfect Run
by Void Herald
The Perfect Run is now available on Amazon Kindle.
Ryan "Quicksave" Romano is an eccentric adventurer with a strange power: he can create a save-point in time and redo his life whenever he dies. Arriving in New Rome, the glitzy capital of sin of a rebuilding Europe, he finds the city torn between mega-corporations, sponsored heroes, superpowered criminals, and true monsters. It's a time of chaos, where potions can grant the power to rule the world and dangers lurk everywhere.
Ryan only sees different routes; and from Hero to Villain, he has to try them all. Only then will he achieve his perfect ending... no matter how many loops it takes.
The Perfect Run updates on Tuesday and Saturday. Cover by Vitaly S. Alexius.
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This is a work of art. Its like groundhog day not only in premise, but in comedy, tragedy, and heart as well.
Filler filler filler filler banana filler filler filler fish fillet filler filler i hate typing on a smartphone filler filler filler filler am i at 50 yet? Filler filler filler
TL;DR Don't let the plethora of rave reviews by this author's fanboys fool you. If you like intelligent, thoughtful, or sympathetic MC's this story is not for you. I explain exactly why, in detail, below.
Ok Prose and Grammar. Decent world building. But the MC is utterly insufferable, which bleeds heavily into the direction of the plot. MC acts in stupid or suboptimal ways because he is easily bored. This makes him unsympathetic.
For example, in the first chapter, he's shot to death by a superpowered gang enforcer who is after the owner of the bar he's just made a delivery to. So he loads his save, then drives through the front of the bar with his car to run over the superpowered Assassin before beating him to death with a bat. Sounds kind of badass right?
The problem is that he then has to bribe the bar owner to have him testify to the cops that he was helping. He also needs to pay for repairs. Then he has to bribe the the cops so they don't arrest him for being a vigilante, since he isn't a licensed hero or law enforcer. He ends up spending several times the money that the delivery job earned him. In what universe is this outcome part of a "perfect run"?
He has all the time in the world to consider his actions. Yet when during his final altercation with the enforcer, he had to stand in front of his trunk for several moments after hitting him with the car, deciding what weapon to use. He did this despite having just waited for the enforcer outside the bar in his car for upwards of an hour (his save point was a couple hours back). The fact that he hadn't already worked out exactly how he was going to dispatch the enforcer highlights just how big a fool the main character really is.
In the very next chapter, he is tinkering in his boxers because, according to him, clothes represent confirmity, and taking them off represents freeing himself from the constraints imposed upon him by society. What hipser nonsense. This is eccentricy for eccentricty's sake, to the detriment of plot and character. Experimenting with weaponized gadgets requires PPE. Especially, as he himself put it, he hates loading in quick succession to solve for things.
Bottomline: he MC is a grandstanding fool more concerned with dick waving, face-slapping, and standing apart from the crowd than practicality. Poor impulse control. No foresight. No prudence. And a grade schooler could use his power in smarter ways than he does.
I found the first chapter annoying to read due to the poor writing. A quick proofread would fix some of the obvious issues.
Story is a bit rough but interesting.
Maybe the quality increases as the story progresses, but I think i'll pass. Not worth my time, when the author isn't putting enough deligence into his craft.